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Motherhood

Global Bedtime Rituals For The Littles

Although it’s true that we are are a singular species of Earthlings formed of the same biological matter, we are still shaped by cultural and geographic differences, especially when it comes to parenting.

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Dani Katz

And while there are (at least) a zillion-and-one aspects that we could examine in terms of cross-cultural chasms/crossovers when it comes to the rearing of our littles, let us focus our attention on that most confounding of parental riddles—bedtime—while exploring how folks around the world put their kiddos to sleep.

What time is bedtime?

Let’s start with the basics, as in when we’re putting our babes to bed. Psychologist Jodi Mindell, PhD, studied over 28,000 infants and toddlers in 17 different countries and concluded that global bedtimes are (pun intended) all over the map.
Whereas American kids are turning in—on average—around 8:30 p.m., Kiwi kids hit New Zealand’s proverbial hay anywhere between 7:30 and 10:45 p.m.
But, that’s almost 11 o’clock! I can hear the early-to-bed, early-to-rise camp crying. And while that’s true, 10:45 is still the outside edge of a rather spacious range. Parents in many Asian countries, on the other hand, are putting kids to sleep around 9:30 p.m., on average, with kids in Hong Kong settling in as late as 10:30 p.m.
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In another bedtime study, titled “Sleep Patterns Among South Korean Infants and Toddlers: Global Comparison,” Mindell reported that “children from predominantly Asian contexts had significantly later bedtimes [and] shorter sleep duration.”
Not compared with the Spanish, though. Maybe it’s the siestas, but parents in Spain—and Southern Europe in general—tend to put their kids to sleep after their notoriously late dinners—around 10 p.m.
According to journalist Amy Choi, Spanish parents are “horrified at the concept” of removing children from the hustle and bustle of late-night family life to fall asleep alone in a dark room.
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One Spanish mother, tired of the criticism she receives from her UK pals for putting her 5-month-old to bed around 10, tells HealthyWay, “You could equally ask…why the British insist on getting their children into bed in the middle of the afternoon (because that’s how 6:30/7 is perceived by us!), and then are surprised when said children wake up at 5 a.m.” She has a point…

Setting Routines

In her book The Secret Life of Sleep, Kat Duff writes about the Southern European propensity for including children in late-night activities. Little ones in Greece, Spain, and Italy generally accompany their parents to late dinners and post-mealtime gatherings, simply falling asleep whenever and wherever they do—in laps or in corners—instead of at pre-established bedtimes.
Same goes in Bali, as well as in parts of the Yucatan, where children are passed among a rotating bevy of relatives, neighbors, and caretakers throughout the evening’s activities, while they doze, wake, and then doze again.

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Dani Katz

It’s a totally different approach from that of the Dutch, who dig regimented sleep routines as much as Americans do. While order and time specifications vary, bedtime protocols (in parts of the world where they’re actually favored) generally include eating and bathing (or the reverse), followed by story time and lullabies, then lights out.
“Rhythm is super important,” emphasizes New Mexico–based parenting coach Michele Worstell, who favors the dinner, bath, bedtime story trifecta of sleepy-time magic.
Christiane Ashline, a healer with spiritual leanings, does her own variation but adds lavender oil to the bath and affixes “a plant-dyed lampshade for story time” before reciting a prayer and turning all the house lights off, which puts the whole family to sleep at the same time. Along with prayers and affirmations, lots of American moms are now relying on guided meditations and mindfulness apps to help with the bedtime situation.
“My kids both [use] the app Headspace before bed,” says Wyoming-based entrepreneur/mom Patty Triplett West. “They love it.”
And while South African parents recognize bedtime rituals such as bathing as both wonderful and effective, the Cape Town water situation makes nightly bath routines prohibitive.
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“Unfortunately with the tight water restrictions in Cape Town, [nightly bathing] is not always possible,” says South Africa–based parenting coach Celeste Rushby. “Most families are just top-and-tailing for one to two nights between the nights of bathing.”
Sometimes geographic parenting trends have little to do with perspective or tradition, and everything to do with environmental living conditions like this one.

And down will come baby…

Whether logged with a red “x” in the nightly bedtime dossier or whispered while a child is bounced on a knee around a roaring drum circle, lullabies seem to be standard sleepy-time protocol no matter where one goes in the world. As archaeomusicologist Richard Dumbrill said, “Lullabies belong to the instinctive nature of motherhood.”

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Dani Katz

Ranging from the sweet to the sinister, global lullabies imbue the darkness associated with bedtime into the storylines, verily scaring little ones to sleep. Take, for example, the popular Kenyan ditty that warns of babies who cry being eaten by hyenas, or the popular American one brought over from the UK, wherein we sing about rock-a-bye-ing our babies from unstable tree tops that ultimately break.

Spain utilizes its saddest melodies and most melancholy texts to tinge her children’s first slumber.

And then there are the melancholy lullabies, such as a popular one from Iraq that doubles as a funeral dirge and includes the lyric: What a pain in my heart. Oh my son, how I wish to hear from my loved ones.
Poet Federico Garcia Lorca spent a good chunk of the 1920s studying Spanish lullabies and concluded that “Spain utilizes its saddest melodies and most melancholy texts to tinge her children’s first slumber.”
Despite their varying geographic origins, lullabies all seem to make use of repetition, which contributes to healthy neurological development.
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According to author and child development expert Sally Goddard Blythe, cross-cultural lullabies also feature similar rhythmic composition patterns, including the favored 6/8 time signature, which lends itself to the rocking that generally accompanies the bedtime sing-along.

…cradle and all

Nurses in Swiss maternity wards put newborns to sleep in Hängematten—rocking, swinging, bouncing hammocks that soothe babies’ nervous systems, which can be a little freaked out after journeying down the birth canal. Hammocks without such fancy names are also favored by parents in Vietnam and parts of Central America, where babies hang above ground next to their parents’ beds.

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Dani Katz

Filipina moms rock their babies to sleep in a rattan cradle called a duyan and then transfer them onto a sleeping mat called a banig once they slip into unconsciousness.
In Japan, parents park kiddos on futons or straw mats when it’s time to go to sleep, while Scandinavians favor swaddling their babies tight and then taking them outside for stroller naps.
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But we’re not talking about naps, are we? Let’s stick with our Northern European friends and home in on the Swedish practice of “buffing,” wherein parents lay babies face down and rhythmically pat their wee little bums until they doze off.

To co-sleep or not to co-sleep.

Co-sleeping is as cross-culturally controversial as it is common. The practice is fairly unquestioned in most of Asia and Africa as well as in parts of Europe, where—as we’ve already determined—routines are shunned as often as beds are shared.
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“We first came [to Goa] when [my daughter] was 6,” British ex-pat Melanie Cordeaux told me of her family’s move to South India from the UK.
“It was very different, as all of our Goan friends were surprised that she slept in her own room and that we put her to bed by 7:30. Their children hadn’t even had supper by then and went to bed much later and slept with them until they were at least 8 years old, perhaps even later.”
Let’s add South India to that belated bedtime section, shall we?

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Dani Katz

Co-sleeping is the norm in Japan, where, according to James McKenna, PhD, of the Natural Child Project, “parents (or grandparents) often sleep in proximity with their children until they are teenagers.” This arrangement is referred to as “the river,” wherein the mother and father represent the banks and the child between them represents the water.
In Korea, 30 percent of infants and toddlers sleep in their parents’ room, while a whopping 64 percent share their parents’ bed—64 percent!
Americans generally shy away from co-sleeping, instead favoring cribs, nurseries, and private rooms indicative of the American allegiance to independence. The American Academy of Pediatrics discourages parents from co-sleeping, citing injury risks and accidental suffocation as imminent threats.
“Most people I see in every country have a problem breaking the bad habit of lying with their children to get them to fall asleep,” Dubai-based parenting coach Andalene Salvesen told me, pointing rather clearly to her perspective on the co-sleeping situation.
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“Falling asleep independently was associated with longer nocturnal sleep duration and few nocturnal awakenings,” Mindell wrote in her 2016 global comparison study. “Parents in Australia and New Zealand favor self-soothing and independent sleeping,” she claims.
Aussie mama Zoë adheres to this national norm by putting her own daughter down after bath time and then reading to her, singing to her, and “telling her she is the love of my life, kissing her on the head, and then … finally doing some work.”
Sounds pretty independent to me.
The beauty of this cross-cultural romp through the (literal) world of bedtime strategies is that we get to glimpse the beauty of our diversity and start to recognize that there are as many ways to parent as there are parents.

Categories
Wellbeing

5 Reasons You Shouldn't Feel Guilty for Watching Television

Television is terrible for you. Haven’t you heard?

That’s why you might feel a secret thrill when you overhear co-workers discussing a TV show that you missed, because, of course, you were busy reading last night. Or, more commonly, why you feel a twinge of guilt when you hit “play next.”
Either way, that emotional response is tied to the narrative that TV is bad for you. And the research feeds that narrative—it might even have birthed it.
Here’s what the scientific literature tells us: We know that watching more TV increases obesity risk in children and that watching more TV can increase our chance of developing life-threatening illnesses. We’ve learned that watching violent television can desensitize kids to violence. We don’t dispute these things. There are real reasons “the idiot box” has become a central metaphor for an escapist, death-denying, sedentary, maybe-even-honest-to-goodness decadent Western lifestyle.

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But just because something can be bad for us doesn’t mean it can’t also be good for us. When watching TV, several unique conditions—what you’re watching, and when, where, and why, and who with, and how much—all add up to different psychosocial, physiological, and emotional health effects. We’re only now beginning to learn how good or bad they all are.
Dr. Robin Nabi is a professor of media effects and health communication at the University of California at Santa Barbara, and she’s one of a growing group of researchers who seem to say, sure, media consumption can contribute to negative health outcomes. But that’s not the whole story.

We always seem to start from this place of, ‘How could this cause problems?’ rather than this place of, ‘How can this be wonderful?’

In their research, Nabi and her colleagues ask what a healthy media diet looks like “so we can maximize the benefits and minimize the costs, physiologically and emotionally,” she tells HealthyWay.

To be clear, no one is suggesting you drop everything and binge the entirety of Netflix tomorrow.

Binging on anything, as the term implies, is probably not great for your health. We just don’t want the pervasive, ambient guilt we often attach to TV viewing to deprive you of the true comfort you might find in a few episodes of your favorite show.

“We’re not saying, ‘Oh, you should watch 8 hours of television a day. You’ll be healthier,'” Nabi explains. “It’s more … your media diet can contribute to your health just like the food you eat can contribute to your health … We’re just starting to scratch the surface of that question.”
The relationship between media and well-being is a newish sub-sub-(maybe sub)-field of research, but already a couple things are clear: Our relationship to television doesn’t operate along a binary, good/bad dynamic, and it’s probably alright to let go and enjoy the occasional evening with the remote—especially when you’re stressed out, or worse. The evidence is slowly amassing.

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So, while the researchers work on the details of a truly healthy media diet, be kind to yourself when you feel like relaxing in front of the screen. Here are a few reasons you shouldn’t feel guilty for watching television:

1. If you watch TV to relieve stress, you are certainly not alone.

Who uses media (including, for our purposes, television) to cope with stress? At least two groups, according to Nabi and colleagues’ recent published research in the field. They asked 421 undergraduate college students and 102 survivors of breast cancer to describe the coping mechanisms they used to handle stress over the previous four weeks.
The responses featured the range you’d expect. People listed exercise, talking to or being with friends or family, deep breathing, yoga, prayer. They listed sleep and food and going to therapy. Some threw themselves into work or school, while others—amazingly few—chose unhealthy behaviors such as substance abuse.
Among both groups, though, “media use” was in the top five coping strategies listed without any prompting from the researchers whatsoever. In both groups, people used media more often than religion to cope with stress. To be clear, the researchers didn’t code responses for specific types of media, so we don’t know who was going to the IMAX theater and who was playing video games. But if you choose to watch TV to deal with a stressful moment, this study suggests you’ll find yourself in plenty of company.

2. There’s some physiological evidence that TV can reduce stress levels.

If watching television actually helps to reduce stress, you’d assume that people who use media effectively, from a physiological perspective, would have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol. That was the idea behind one of Nabi’s and colleagues’ earlier studies.
“What we did was measure people’s stress hormones … before and then while they were watching different types of media,” Nabi says.

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The research team found that women who watched more television had lower cortisol levels than those who reported less time spent viewing. (Note that, perplexingly, men did not show the same relationship between TV and cortisol.)
“Now, we can’t necessarily make a causal argument because of the nature of our data collection,” Nabi says. “But it does suggest there is some relationship there.”
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And there seems to be something to it—in the American Psychology Association’s 2017 “Stress in America” survey, 33 percent of men and 39 percent of women said that they watch television to manage their stress.
Of course, researchers are stuck with statistical analysis. We’re free to be a bit more anecdotal, so we put the question to you: Do you feel less stressed out when you watch television? And if so, why feel bad about that?

3. Our cultural narrative about TV viewership still skews negative.

The evidence against television has been piling up since the first twist of the knob—and really, this happens with any new medium. Anyone who heard Plato argue that poetry has no place in the ideal society, or noticed that Madame Bovary is a novel about the dangers of novels, or read Dr. Fredric Wertham’s 1950s arguments against comic books, could have predicted this.

As human beings, we tend to orient more towards negative than towards the positive, because those are the things that are threatening.

“Concern on the part of the public and Congress about the harmful influence of media violence on children dates back to the 1950s and 1960s, and remains strong today,” Dr. Dale Kunkel told the U.S. Senate Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transportation in 2007. “The legitimacy of that concern is corroborated by extensive scientific research that has accumulated over the past 40 years.”
Kunkel’s right. But we have over 40 years of evidence that he’s right. What, in the obsessive search for the negatives, have we missed? What else can we discover about our consumption of media—and television in particular?

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“We always seem to start from this place of, ‘How could this cause problems?’ rather than this place of, ‘How can this be wonderful?'” says Nabi. Media researchers are just beginning to look at the second question, and the fact that it took this long probably shouldn’t surprise anyone, either.
In studying the media—and, one assumes, pretty much anything else—there are two forces that push researchers toward negative questions, Nabi says, rather than toward questions that could reveal as-yet-uncovered positive health effects.
“One is, as human beings, we tend to orient more towards negative than towards the positive, because those are the things that are threatening,” she says. “So when there’s something new, we go, ‘Uh oh, how could this be a danger?'”
The second reason reflects a similar dynamic, but this time on the part of the forces that hold the university’s purse strings.
“That’s where the [research] funding comes from,” Nabi says. “People don’t say, ‘Hey, let’s study the good stuff.’ They go, ‘Could this be bad? How might this be damaging to kids? We need to find out.'”
In the end, if they’re not careful, the zeitgeist and the researchers end up in the same place. “Watching TV is for slobs,” says the cultural narrative. Then, when we watch TV, we’re left to conclude that we are slobs. Like the images flickering on the screen, though, this is just a story.

4. TV can be a social experience.

If you want to know what a society values, look at what they say about raising their kids. In our case, that means a quick peek through some top mommy blogs. “The Hook: How to Get Kids Reading,” blares a recent headline from MomBlogSociety. “How to get kids excited about reading,” CoolMomPicks promises to reveal. “Creative Ways to Foster a Love of Reading in Your Kids,” says ScaryMommy.

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Guess how many pieces about getting kids to look at screens you’ll find on these blogs. And while we’re the first to champion the power of the written word (pow!), why must it come at the expense of another way to consume a story?
“Parents, a lot, are like, ‘Oh, I feel so terrible. I’m the worst mom. I just put my kid in front of the iPad,'” Nabi says. “Well, it’s not the iPad, necessarily. It’s the amount of time [kids] use it, and it’s what they’re actually doing on it.”
Novels have their strengths. So do television shows. For example, television—like film, theater, opera before it—can be a shared experience. You join your friends for movie night. You and a spouse cuddle during a favorite show. Your mother, your father, your child, your cat: You don’t always watch alone.
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“Fundamentally, it doesn’t matter how technologically sophisticated we become; emotional connectivity remains a core part of being human,” Drs. Shoba Sreenivisan and Linda E. Weinberg wrote for Psychology Today. “We need each other—maybe not in the ways that characterized us evolutionarily, but for a need that remains essential for psychological survival.”

5. Sometimes, TV is the only social experience you’re capable of.

The value of TV as a social experience is thrown into high relief in cases of illness or despair or even during end-of-life care. There are times you don’t want to talk or aggressively socialize, and further, there are times that you simply cannot. Group television viewing offers what must be the best way to be together without having to fill the silence.

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“If you could use [television] in a way that helps to build these social connections, and these bonds, then that could actually lead to longer-term stress relief,” Nabi says. “There’s evidence that social support and social connections aid in dealing with stress, in mitigating the negative effects of stress on health when someone is already dealing with, particularly, a health challenge.”

I’ll Go First: TV Has Helped

I have mourned deaths and nursed broken hearts and had run-of-the-mill rotten days by the hundreds. But I had, and have, a cure. No, not a cure—there is no cure—but a balm—and it is there for me, right there on the DVD shelf where it’s stood since, well, since people used to buy DVDs and put them on shelves. It is called Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
For you it might be Empire or Macgyver or Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Maybe it’s the Harry Potter movies or the works of Terrence Malick. Maybe it’s Family Matters, maybe Game of Thrones. The point is, maybe you can identify. Maybe you depend on television and film to be an emotional release valve the way we do. And maybe it’s time to stand up and be counted—without the guilt.
Nabi doesn’t dispute the research on the downsides of media use, she assures us. “It is real, but there are silver linings here, too. And it might not just be silver linings,” she says. “It might be sunshine and rainbows.”

Categories
Lifestyle

Another Nightmare? Here Are The 4 Things You're Doing That Can Cause Bad Dreams

A single hair is growing from the center of my tongue again. It is wiry and impossibly long. It dangles out of my mouth and gets caught in my crumbling teeth. I try to pluck the hair. It hurts, but its root is attached much deeper down than my tongue. It goes down to my core, in fact. If I pull it out I will die.
There is a dark presence in the room. It watches me struggle with my tongue hair and disintegrating dental work. If I can scream loud enough, the stranger will not harm me. I fill my lungs. I bellow…
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And find myself transported back to my bedroom, where my wife has just kicked and nudged me awake. It’s the wee hours of the morning and I sense myself hyperventilating.
“Was I screaming?” I pant.
“No. You were going, ‘Myeh.'” She offers a pathetic bleating, the complaint of a scrawny goat as opposed to an adult human determined to live.
“No way,” I say. “That was a scream. A shriek. This was a night terror.”
“No,” she corrects me. “You don’t wake up during night terrors. You generally don’t remember the content of a night terror episode.”
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I later check Mayo Clinic and Sleep.org. My wife’s right—again.
We decide to call it a scream dream. It’s become the subject of some contention in our household.
Sometimes I have several scream dreams a week. Other times months go by without a single instance. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, I find myself bleating into my pillow again. Of course, within the dream, I’m letting out a mighty wail.

The Stuff Nightmares Are Made of

The National Sleep Foundation (NSF), a healthcare advocacy group, recently published a list of common causes of nightmares (which are, remember, distinct from “sleep terrors” or “night terrors”).
It reads like a checklist of my not-so-commendable lifestyle decisions. No wonder I have scream dreams.
Causes of nightmares in adults, according to the NSF, may include:
1. Feeling more stress than usual. Extreme forms of stress, such as post-traumatic stress disorder and anxiety disorders, can certainly cause nightmares.
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So can periods of increased non-pathological stress, such as a promotion at work or a serious life change.
2. Sleep deprivation. Oddly enough, your brain’s reward for finally getting a bit of the rest it so desperately needs can be terrible nightmares.
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This, of course, can lead to even less sleep. It’s a tough cycle to break.
3. Late-night snacks. Sorry, but I feel like I have to quote Dickens here: “You may be an undigested bit of beef, a blot of mustard, a crumb of cheese, a fragment of underdone potato,” Scrooge tells Marley’s ghost in A Christmas Carol. “There’s more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are!”
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Scrooge’s reasoning is solid, even if he happens to be wrong about this particular ghost. Eating boosts your metabolism, which boosts your brain activity, which can lead to nightmares.
4. Certain prescription medications, such as antidepressants. If you notice changes in your sleep patterns or have more nightmares after a change in your medication, talk to your healthcare providers about it. They might be able to suggest a workaround.
That’s the word from the professionals.
Now, my advice: If you find a six-foot, wiry hair growing from the center of your tongue, don’t try to pluck it. To do so might cost you your life.
Also, know that what sounds like a blood-curdling scream inside your dream might sound a bit less impressive to your spouse, kids, or roommate.

Categories
Sweat

Should You Be Concerned About Becoming Red Faced During A Workout?

In my mid-20s, I embarked on the adventure of living carless in a tragically auto-dependent Midwestern city—something I couldn’t have done without my bicycle.
And what a bicycle it was! A Schwinn World Sport from the 1980s, it was black with hot pink striping. It had track wheels (completely unnecessarily) black-wrapped flop and chop bars, and that rear hub? You’d better believe it was fixed.
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It was the ’00s. It was the Midwest. Fixed-gear bicycles were a thing, okay?
All this is to say I had finally broken through into the territory of the legitimately cool—or so I thought. I pictured myself skidding to a stop and crowds erupting into cheers.
That’s why I was so confused when, that first summer, I’d pedal for half an hour up a hill to meet a promising date only to be greeted with with the shame-inducing inquiry:
“What is wrong with your face?! Are you okay?”
I learned it the hard way: When I exert myself, my face turns intensely red and blotchy. It is not a good look for a night out.

Much later, when the bike-only lifestyle collapsed and I slouched into my true and stationary adulthood, I got a gym membership. There I learned I am not alone. I’d sit there pumping away at a stationary bicycle, going nowhere, pretending to locomote despite a daily commute by car, and I’d spot them: my red-faced compatriots.
Are we sick? Is our fate normal? And, most importantly, can the affliction of red-faced people everywhere be used as a legitimate, doctor-sponsored excuse to stop exercising now and forever?
The answers are, respectively: no, yes, and no. Here’s why.

The Real Reasons Your Face Gets Flushed During Workouts

Lots of fair-complected folks share my tomato-faced concern. Readers asked Time magazine health writer Markham Heid about this phenomenon. Heid turned to Edward Coyle, director of the Human Performance Laboratory at the University of Texas at Austin, for official answers.
Getting flushed during exertion is normal for lots of people, Coyle told Heid.
“As your body heats up during activity, your core temperature and your skin temperature increase,” Coyle said. In response, the blood vessels close to the surface of the skin open up, distributing more blood at skin level.
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“This helps cool your blood and therefore your body,” Coyle explained. “But especially if your skin is very pale to begin with, that increased blood flow may result in a red or flushed appearance.”
But that’s not all. Individual differences in skin chemistry can also contribute to this sometimes-embarrassing flush.
“For some people, exercise can cause the cells in the skin to release histamine, which in turn can cause the blood vessels to widen, adding to the exercise-induced flushing,” dermatologist Adam Friedman told Heid.
Like just about everything else—your complexion, body shape, predisposition toward depression, whatever—you can thank your genes for the extremity of your exercise-induced flush. There are worse problems to have.

Today, I ride a bike with lots of gears. Sometimes I even ride it to work. On those rare occasions, I stagger into the office, drenched in sweat, with a purplish face that frankly concerns my co-workers.
So what? I’m fresh out of things to prove. That’s the consolation prize that comes with the end of youth, and besides, the doctors say it’s normal.

How to Address Your Post-Workout Flush

If you’re still in the ride-your-bike-to-a-hot-first-date chapter of life, you might have a vested interest in getting rid of the post-workout flush as quickly as possible.
According to Shape magazine, the trick is to cool your body down or to avoid getting quite so hot in the first place.
“Make time to gradually reduce your heart rate at the end of your workout,” New York Dermatology Group dermatologist Jessica Weiser told Shape.
Don’t skip the cool-down, and remember to stretch.
Even better, leave the house a bit early so you can bike to your sweetheart’s place at a leisurely pace.
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“Doing lower intensity exercises and intermittently taking breaks will bring down your heart rate to help relieve redness before it gets out of hand,” Weiser said.

Categories
Motherhood

The Woman Who Successfully Performed A Cesarean Section On Herself

Ines Ramirez Perez, a 40-year-old mother of seven, made medical history on March 5, 2000, when she became the first woman ever to perform a C-section on herself in which both the baby and mother survived.

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In her isolated, one-room cabin home, Perez performed a modern miracle. She was unable to seek immediate help or medical attention, with her husband—her usual birth coach and assistant during labor—out at a cantina in town that had no phone. Neither did Perez.

Midnight was fast approaching, and after 12 hours of unbearable labor pain, Perez knew what she had to do.

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“I couldn’t stand the pain anymore,” she told a reporter. “And if my baby was going to die, then I decided I would have to die, too. But if he was going to grow up, I was going to see him grow up, and I was going to be with my child. I thought that God would save both our lives,” she added.

A Determined Mother

Having lost a baby girl just two years earlier because of obstructed labor, Perez was driven by her desperation to save her unborn child as she made a brave but terrifying decision with only her younger children to accompany her.

Left to endure her labor alone and knowing she would not be able to deliver the baby vaginally after her earlier pregnancy trouble, Perez got started on the task at hand with no previous medical training or experience.

Going simply on mother’s intuition, Perez began to operate on herself with a knife with a 6-inch blade, doing anything she could to birth her baby safely. After more than an hour of work and three separate but successful attempts to cut into her abdomen, Perez was able to reach into her uterus and pull out her baby boy.

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As her final act of bravery before fainting, Perez cut her new son’s umbilical cord with a pair of scissors.

Help on the Way

After regaining consciousness, Perez bandaged her wound with her sweater and ordered her oldest son, 8-year-old Benito, to find help in town. After several hours, health workers arrived at the scene to find Perez awake and alert lying next to her infant.

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After her almost 7-inch wound was sewn up with household needle and thread, Perez and her new son were loaded gently onto a straw mat, carried to the town’s only road, and driven to a local clinic over two hours away, and then on to a hospital another eight hours away.

About 16 hours after her delivery in her small cabin, Perez underwent surgery at the hospital to repair the incision site.

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On her seventh day post-op, Perez had a second surgery to fix complications in her intestines as a result of the botched C-section, but she otherwise made a full recovery, was photographed breastfeeding her miracle baby, Orlando Ruiz Ramirez, and was then released after a 10-day hospital stay.

Word of the surgery spread.

As there were no witnesses that day with Perez to corroborate her story, the miraculous birth received little attention until the following year.

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Two OB-GYNs who examined her at the hospital that night shared her story with an enraptured audience at a medical conference, eventually leading to her case study being published three years later in International Journal of Gynecology and Obstetrics.

According to the report of one of the OB-GYNs who examined her in the hospital hours later, Perez had no sepsis in her wounds or abdominal cavity and no internal bleeding, and her uterus was returning to its regular size and place in her body, as is normal after delivery.

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Perez performed her operation with a different type of cut from what is typically used; her method involved making a vertical incision to the right of her belly button, going from under her rib cage to just above her bikini line.

Using this approach when she was squatting with her pelvis forward, Perez w
as able to cut straight through the skin to her uterus, reducing the risking of damaging any internal organs. This is likely what saved her life.

A Complex Procedure

A typical C-section is performed by cutting a horizontal line under the abdomen, generally right along the bikini line a few inches below the belly button.

This complicated procedure requires cutting through multiple layers of flesh, fatty tissue, abdominal muscles, and multiple other thin, papery layers of tissue surrounding the womb, taking special care not to damage the bowel, intestine, or bladder.

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Although C-sections have become more common recently, with approximately one out of three babies in the U.S. delivered this way, historically they were only used as a last resort to save the baby when the mother was dying or had already passed.

Murky History

These earliest C-sections were not performed in a manner in which a mother could survive. They often involved removing or cutting the entire abdomen, and because of this, there are no recollections or accounts from surviving mothers of this operation until about 1500, when legend has it that the wife of a Swiss pig farmer became the first woman to survive a cesarean surgery.

This completely changed the way the operation was performed—now with a mission of preserving the life of the mother.

Despite its grim history, the origins of the cesarean are fascinating.

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It is named for the famed Julius Caesar, who oft-repeated legends say was the first person to be born via cesarean.

But history tells us his mother survived childbirth, and given the nature of the procedure in those days, we know he probably wasn’t the first. (Another unconfirmed tale says that one of his uncles was the real first.)

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Regardless of who was the first baby delivered via this method, we know that the mothers did not survive the procedure. Although these children were born under the sad circumstances of losing a mother, in some cultures this was believed to be a good omen, as a few of the Greek gods were said to be born via C-section as well.

Present-Day Challenges

The operation has changed much over the centuries from the gruesome procedure it originated as. With maternal and fetal deaths at a historic all-time low, the profoundly brave but extremely dangerous act of Perez—doing all that she could not to lose another child—might have been entirely unnecessary had she had access to proper health care in a timely fashion.

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An estimated 1,000 women die in Mexico per year from pregnancy- or delivery-related complications, many of which could have been treated and possibly prevented with immediate medical attention.

Poor, rural, marginalized, and indigenous pregnant women like Perez face a 2 to 10 times higher risk of dying than other Mexican women, because their access to contraception and emergency care is more limited. There are no other known reports or cases of mother and baby surviving a self-performed C-section.

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Given the nature of the operation, the isolated location, and no access to a medical team, most pregnancy complications that arise in remote, rural areas do result in fetal or maternal death, making Perez and her baby’s delivery truly remarkable.

Categories
Lifestyle

Exactly How Gross Are Dog Kisses? Here's What To Know

Even if it’s a little icky, many people let their dogs lick their faces. Of course, there’s an obvious yuck factor, but are there actual health reasons to refrain from dog kisses?
The answer turns out to be more complex than we expected.
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Dogs lick their owners for a variety of reasons. They may be playing, tasting, or seeking attention. Though there are many possibilities, Patty Khuly VMD told Vetstreet, “The bottom line is that most of the time, dogs will lick their people as a sign of affection.”

There are certain situations in which face-licking is definitely not okay.

There are a few instances in which experts agree that it’s not a good idea to kiss your dog. Shelly Rankin, PhD, an associate professor of microbiology at the University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine, warned that babies, pregnant women, the elderly, and people receiving chemotherapy should beware of puppy kisses.
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These groups all have compromised or underdeveloped immune systems and may be more susceptible to disease transmission.
Rankin added, “Anywhere the skin is broken, there’s potentially a risk,” which means if anyone in your family is struggling with acne, your pooch’s face-licking needs to be strictly discouraged.

Certain diseases can spread easily from dogs to humans.

A study published in the Archives of Oral Biology found that periodontopathic bacteria (which are basically disease-causing germs in the mouth) are transmitted between dogs and humans. Veterinarian Francoise Tyler told MSN that “If a pet has medical issues such as periodontal disease or intestinal parasites, there is a risk for cross-infection.”
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In an interview with People, Dr. Mehmet Oz pointed out that through scavenging, a dog could pick up giardia, hookworm, tapeworm, or salmonella. If you smooch your dog right after a walk, those germs could make their way onto your face or into your mouth.
That being said, there may be some benefits from trading germs with your pets. A 2012 study showed that babies who lived with dogs had lower instances of respiratory illness.
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Of course, the dogs weren’t necessarily licking the babies in the study, so canine kisses still aren’t exactly vindicated.

Whether their kisses are dangerous or not, dogs’ mouths are grody.

“There is a myth that dogs’ mouths are cleaner than human’s mouths, and this is blatantly untrue,” Dr. Katy Nelson told Reader’s Digest. “The average American human brushes and flosses their teeth twice daily and I don’t know too many canines that live up to that.”
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Anyone who’s taken a dog on a walk knows that they stick their snouts in less-than-sanitary places. A garbage can that other dogs have peed on is one of the most desired sniffing spots, which should tell you a lot about dogs and hygiene.

But sometimes, a little dose of ick is a good thing.

Kim Kelly, a postdoctoral research associate at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, studies the possible health benefits of microbe transfer from dogs to humans. She believes that contact with dogs could have a probiotic effect on humans.
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In the course of her research, Kelly has found that adults who had contact with dogs had better immune systems and improved emotional well-being. However, it’s not clear exactly what causes those benefits.
Kelly has heard anecdotes claiming that dog kisses have healed people but is also aware of cases in which dog saliva caused serious illness. She hopes to learn more about the health effects of trading microbes with canines, but for now she remains skeptical when it comes to whether kissing your pup is a good idea.
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“People need to be cautious,” she told USA Today. “We just don’t know enough at this point.”

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Wellbeing

Woman Asks Boss To Take Mental Health Day, Boss Has Perfect Response

Madalyn Parker describes herself as a “web developer, music enthusiast, rabbit owner, knitter, xstitcher, mental health advocate | empathy engineer @olark.”
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Like most working humans—especially those who struggle with mental health issues—Parker was feeling overwhelmed at work and felt like she needed a few days off so she could give her all at the workplace.
Parker sent a note to her boss saying that she was planning to take a couple of days off “to focus on her mental health.”
You may be expecting a snooty response from a money-grubbing manager, but it was the company CEO, Ben Congleton, who responded, thanking Parker for reminding him that it’s totally appropriate—and often necessary—to use sick days to focus on mental health.

“You are an example to us all,” Congleton wrote to his employee, “and help cut through the stigma so we can all bring our whole selves to work.”

What a boss!

Parker was blown away by her employer’s response and asked if she could screenshot the email and share it on Twitter, writing that “It’s kind of a big deal that the CEO is so supportive of my mental health.” Her boss consented.
Since then, tens of thousands of people have engaged with Parker’s tweet. All of the attention encouraged Congleton to reflect on his simple email response, as well.
“It is incredibly hard to be honest about mental health in the typical workplace,” the Olark CEO wrote on his company’s blog. “In situations like this, it is so easy to tell your teammates you are ‘not feeling well.’ Even in the safest environment it is still uncommon to be direct with your coworkers about mental health issues. I wanted to call this out and express gratitude for Madalyn’s bravery in helping us normalize mental health as a normal health issue.”
The thing is, as Congleton explained, his response to Parker, “should be business as usual. We [humanity] have a lot of work to do.”

The Olark CEO went on to address other business executives, reminding them that their job in leadership is “to empower and motivate our teams to maximize the impact of our organization for our customers, our employees, our shareholders, and the world.”
“It’s 2017,” Congleton wrote, pointing out our place in a modern world. “I cannot believe that it is still controversial to speak about mental health in the workplace when 1 in 6 Americans are medicated for mental health.”
“When an athlete is injured they sit on the bench and recover,” Parker’s boss blogged. “Let’s get rid of the idea that somehow the brain is different.”

Not a One-Off Response

This isn’t the first time that Parker has needed to use sick days to focus on her mental health. In a 2015 Medium post, the web developer detailed her history of dealing with anxiety, depression, panic attacks, insomnia, and even thoughts of suicide.
She also wrote about how hard it was to reach out to her superiors to discuss how she could balance her mental health issues with her work responsibilities.
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Once she did reach out, Parker remembers, the company leader that she spoke to, “didn’t mention my performance at all. The conversation was quickly focused on my well-being and health, and the team’s willingness to work with me during my low points.”
To top it off, Parker’s decision to speak with her superior “spurred a team-wide conversation about mental and emotional obstacles.”

Company Culture

Parker counts herself lucky to be a part of a company that works hard to provide a healthy work culture. At Olark, a digital chat widget company, they promote the following values:
Chill out, Help each other, Assume good faith, Make it happen, Practice empathy, and Speak your mind.
By nurturing these values, listening to their employees, and creating a flexible workspace for a diverse staff, Olark is showing how a modern company can and should operate.
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Thanks to Madalyn Parker for fighting for the recognition of mental health issues as plain ol’ health issues. And thanks to Olark CEO Ben Congleton and the rest of his management team for listening and acting on Parker’s behalf.
The world could use more great examples like Olark.

Categories
Motherhood

Why All Parents Should Check Their Kids' Phones For The Yellow App

It’s been dubbed “Tinder for Teens,” but this app provides predators with everything they need to contact a child.
Every parent needs to be aware of Yellow.

The Yellow App

Yellow is marketed as “the app to make new friends and chat with them! It’s so fun!”
To make “new friends,” users “swipe right to like and left to pass,” much like the adult dating app Tinder.
“If it’s a mutual like,” according to the app’s description, “you get a new chat friend.”
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What’s not made explicitly clear in the app’s description is that this “new chat friend” immediately becomes a Snapchat friend.
The danger with Snapchat, as child internet safety website Protect Young Eyes puts it, is that some kids “find it way too easy to send inappropriate photos.”

More Than Mischievous Teens to Worry About

While Snapchat and Yellow are both marketed to younger audiences, perhaps the scariest thing about these apps is how easy it is for adult predators to impersonate young teens.
“It’s very easy to put in a fake birthday and portray yourself as a 15-year-old boy that plays football at the high school,” FBI Special Agent Vicki Anderson told WXYZ Detroit.
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A spokesperson for the UK-based National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children described the danger of the app to The Sun:

Any app that allows strangers to send photos to children or vice versa is troubling—particularly where the images being exchanged are of a sexual nature. Yellow’s settings that enable adults to view children, through a service blatantly aimed at flirting and relationships, also creates an opportunity for sexual predators to target young people.

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“We’re now in a stage where adults are using [Yellow] to target students and to groom them. And grooming only leads to one conclusion. That’s a sexual encounter with a child,” said Akron Public Schools general counsel Rhonda Porter when interviewed by WXYZ Detroit.

Supposed Community Guidelines

Yellow’s community guidelines are ambitious, but it’s not entirely clear how the website enforces their rules other than following leads in reports from users, parents, or law enforcement agents.
The app’s website say it expects users not to “ask for nudes” and to “never harass, bully or spam other users.” It goes on to discourage “threats of physical harm or other criminal activities” and states that users shouldn’t “post content which is sexist, racist, homophobic or discriminatory in any other way.”
From there, Yellow expects users to feature a picture of their face first and demands that they “never pretend to be someone else.” They also insist that users not lie about their birthdays.
Unfortunately, as Kristen Smolen, a parent interviewed by WXYZ Detroit points out, there’s no system for age verification built into the app.
Yellow’s guidelines state, “If you are under 18, it is totally forbidden to make friends with users over 18.”
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That’s a great sentiment, but Yellow needs to be much more transparent about how they’re enforcing these guidelines. Furthermore, for parents to make good decisions about whether to allow their kids to use Yellow, its literature should clarify whether these guidelines are explicit rules or simply recommendations.
Perhaps the most serious-sounding guidelines reads, “Any sexual content involving minors will be reported directly to the police.” Again, though, the app’s administrators are not clear about who is responsible for that reporting, nor do they clarify who this reporting is meant to serve.

“You need to be parents.”

Kids are prone to following social trends, and there are already more than 6 million users on Yellow.
“It’s an important time to warn parents—you need to be parents,” said Special Agent Anderson in her WXYZ interview.
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“Be nosy. You need to know who [your] kids are talking to and what information they’re putting online.”
By spelling out clear expectations and rules and having age-appropriate conversations with children about why they need to be careful on all social media platforms, parents can help eager teens learn how to avoid potentially dangerous and compromising situations.

Categories
Sweat

8 Unspoken Gym Etiquette Rules That Everyone Should Follow

Kristin McEwen knows a thing or two about gym etiquette.
She’s vice-president of YMCA of Metro Atlanta (Georgia), and she’s seen it all. People walk into the gym in skimpy outfits, cell phones blaring. They forget to change their stinky old workout clothes. Worst of all, McEwen told CNN, they sweat all over the machines—and don’t lift a finger to clean the equipment.
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“We’ll have people who come in, and they will sweat profusely, and they will leave puddles around the equipment,” McEwen said. Anyone would agree with her final comment on the situation.
“It’s gross,” she said.
Surely, no one should have to deal with rude and clueless people while working out. Even if the rules of the gym remain unspoken, most people know them instinctively.
So don’t be “that person.” You know the one. They don’t re-rack their weights, or they engage in a full-on screaming phone conversation while walking on the treadmill at 0.01 mph. Use this list to brush up on rules for the gym so you can help ensure working out is just a little more tolerable for yourself and everyone else.

1. Do not disturb.

When someone has headphones on, leave them alone. This may seem obvious, but some people haven’t figured it out, at least not in our experience. People use music or podcasts to help them focus and get in the zone for their workout, and when another person insists on attempting a conversation, it’s terribly distracting.

2. Get swol, not sick.

Infections spread easily in the public gym setting. It’s incredibly important to wash your hands before using any equipment. 
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Also, wipe the machines down as soon as you’re finished. If you’re worried about the cleanliness of your gym, wipe machines down before you use them too and let an employee know about any…issues.

3. Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

The squat rack mirror is not the place to touch up your makeup, pose for multiple selfies, or perfect your flex.
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The mirrors placed around a gym are meant to check form and for safety. They aren’t there for you to check yourself out.

4. Where did the weights go?

Don’t make people search the entire gym for weights or barbells. The gym is a public place, and everyone has the right to easily locate and use the equipment. When bars or weights don’t end up back their rightful places, it isn’t fair to others.

5. Clean up after yourself.

Crushing a 300-pound squat set is impressive, but you aren’t finished after the last rep is completed. Whenever you add weight to any of the equipment, you must remove it when you’re finished. Bars that do not get cleared will start to warp over time, eventually rendering them unusable. Plus, it’s common courtesy. If you can put 300 pounds on the bar, you can take it off.

6. Leave the cool moves on the dance floor.

Unless you’re doing serious interval training, there’s no reason to bust out any moves on the treadmill. You’re risking serious injury when you crank the speed up and try to hop on and off.
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Leave those kinds of stunts to the professionals.

7. Contain yourself.

Bringing a towel, a water bottle, and your phone into the gym is perfectly acceptable—just don’t leave these items strewn around. It’s a total faux pas to save machines with personal items. Plus, cluttering up a space other people are using isn’t cool.

8. Hygiene is important.

There’s no way around getting sweaty during a good workout. However, it’s important to make sure your hygiene is on point before stepping foot in the gym. Be sure to wash your workout clothes frequently and, please, wear deodorant!
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Also, don’t forget McEwen’s sweat-puddle horror story. Pack a towel and use it to sop up the puddles of sweat that prove your workout is working.

Categories
Nosh

4 Healthy Pancake Recipes You Definitely Haven't Tried

Homemade pancakes are the perfect start to any morning. You can’t go wrong, whether you prefer traditional flapjacks or like to get creative with the toppings. But box pancake mixes can get stale or go bad even before you even open the package. Plus, traditional pancake mixes and recipes are loaded with sugar and sodium. The solution?
Why not make your own?
We get it; making pancakes from scratch sounds like way more work than the traditional just-add-water mixes you can buy at your local market. But once you taste just one of our four healthy pancake recipes, you won’t mind the extra five minutes of work.
Thinking of giving one of these a try? Check out the recipes below!

Savory Chickpea Avocado Pancakes

The avocado trend shows no sign of slowing down, and we’re okay with that. Avocados are chock full of nutrients, vitamins, and minerals, and contain healthy monounsaturated fatty acids. Chickpea flour is high in iron, protein, and fiber, and it’s gluten-free too! But you won’t even have time to consider how healthy these savory pancakes are once you taste them.

Ingredients

Pancakes:

1 cup chickpea flour
1 cup coconut milk
½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
¼ cup chopped green onion
¼ cup chopped orange bell pepper
¼ tsp cumin
¼ tsp garlic powder

Topping:

1 avocado
¼ cup coconut yogurt
½ tsp garlic powder
1 tsp lime juice
Cilantro to taste

Instructions

1. Combine chickpea flour, baking powder, salt, cumin, and garlic powder in a large bowl. Add coconut milk to the dry mixture and whisk until smooth. 
2. Mix in chopped green onion and orange bell pepper.
3. Spoon mixture in ½ cup increments into a non-stick frying pan and spread to cover the bottom. Cook on medium heat until the edges start to brown and curl up. Flip to cook through.
4. For the topping, core and place half the avocado in a blender, along with yogurt, garlic powder, and lime juice. Blend just until smooth.
5. Top with slices from the other half of the avocado and cilantro to taste. Drizzle with avocado cream sauce.

Dragon Fruit Pancakes

Dragon fruit, also known as the pitaya fruit, is a great alternative to maple syrup and sugary compotes. Sweet and tangy, dragon fruits are loaded with antioxidants, B vitamins, and protein.

Ingredients

Pancakes:

1 cup flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
1 egg
1 cup coconut milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon
1 Tbsp coconut shreds
1 Tbsp maple syrup

Topping:

1 pink-fleshed dragon fruit
1 Tbsp maple syrup
¼ cup coconut yogurt

Instructions

1. Combine flour, baking powder, and baking soda in a large bowl and mix well
2. Add egg, coconut milk, and vanilla extract. 
3. Mix in cinnamon, coconut, and maple syrup until well combined.
4. Spoon mixture in ¼ cup increments into a non-stick frying pan. Cook on medium heat until edges start to brown and bubbles appear on top. Flip and cook other side until cooked through.
5. For the topping, peel and chop the dragon fruit. Blend dragon fruit and yogurt together until combined. Add maple syrup and blend until smooth and runny. Drizzle over warm pancakes to serve.

Maple Butternut Pancakes

HealthyWayThese maple butternut flapjacks are perfect for any autumn morning. Low in fat and high in fiber, the butternut squash purée accounts for the nutty flavor of these delicious pancakes.

Ingredients

Pancakes:

1 ½ cups all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2 eggs
1 ½ cups milk
½ cup butternut squash purée
1 tsp vanilla extract
½ tsp cinnamon
2 Tbsp maple syrup

Topping:

Oats
Sage
Maple syrup

Instructions

1. In a large bowl, combine flour, baking powder, and baking soda. Whisk until combined.
2. Add eggs, milk, vanilla extract, cinnamon, and maple syrup to dry ingredients. Whisk until smooth.
3. Spoon mixture in ¼ cup increments into a non-stick frying pan. Cook on medium heat until the edges start to brown and bubbles appear on top. Flip and cook other side until cooked through.
4. Top with oats and sage. Drizzle with warm maple syrup.

Ginger Carrot Pancakes

After one bite of these ginger carrot pancakes, you’ll swear you’re indulging in a slice of carrot cake. Sure, topping them with cream cheese icing may be offsetting the awesome health benefits of the shredded carrots, walnuts, and fresh ginger, but everyone deserves a treat once and a while right?

Ingredients

Pancakes:

1 cup whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
1 egg
1 ¼ cups milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon
1 Tbsp freshly grated ginger
2 Tbsp maple syrup
Pinch of salt
¼ tsp allspice
¼ cup chopped walnuts
1 ½ cups shredded carrots

Topping:

Chopped walnuts
Shredded carrots
Coconut shreds
Cream cheese icing

Instructions

1. Combine shredded carrots, flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, salt, and allspice in a large bowl. Mix well.
2. Add egg, milk, vanilla extract, and maple syrup. Mix well until combined.
3. Fold in walnuts. Add freshly grated ginger and mix until combined.
4. Spoon mixture in ⅓ cup increments into a non-stick frying pan. Cook on medium heat until edges start to brown and bubbles appear on top. Flip and cook other side until cooked through.
5. Top with chopped walnuts, shredded carrots, shredded coconut, and warm cream cheese icing.