The average plastic bag is actively used for its designated purpose for an average of just 12 minutes before being discarded forever. After use, it will take 500 to 1,000 years for the bag to decompose. This is just one example of the incredible strain that everyday one-time-use plastic products put on our environment.
We’ve been exploring some of this unimaginable waste by the numbers, and we’ve got suggestions for alternatives that can help individuals reduce plastic waste and keep our beautiful planet clean.
Category: Life x Culture
There’s no denying that creating a wedding registry is one of the most exciting parts of getting married. It’s a fun task that assists all of the well-wishers who want to congratulate you with a wedding gift and allows you to truly begin imagining your life and home with the person you’ll marry. However, even though picking out things you like sounds like an easy task, creating a registry is a process—and one that you should definitely put some thought into.
That’s where we come in. From picking out which registry site to use to selecting the items on your list and making sure you follow up appropriately once the gifts are purchased, here’s everything you need to know about creating the perfect wedding registry for you.
The Sites
Forget the days of registering at one store or another—universal wedding registries are where it’s at. They allow you to keep one cohesive list while adding items from any of your favorite stores, whether that’s Target, Williams Sonoma, Crate & Barrel, or Pottery Barn. While you can’t go wrong with the major universal wedding registry options out there, each one has differences and benefits that can help you choose the one that’s right for you.
Amazon — Aside from having any product you could possibly want to add to your registry, one of the biggest benefits of registering with Amazon is shopping with Amazon Smile. When you create your registry with Amazon Smile, money gets donated to charity with every item that’s purchased, allowing your guests to give back as they give to you. As if that weren’t enough, Amazon will also keep track of when a gift was purchased and who bought it, which’ll make sending thank-you notes a breeze. You’ll even have a one-time opportunity to save 10 percent (20 percent for Prime members!) on anything that’s left on your registry after the big day.
Zola — Zola is a relatively new offering when it comes to universal wedding registries, but it’s already changing the game in a big way. Aside from its perfectly curated selection of products, Zola’s most notable feature allows you to add different experiences to your registry. Instead of a new cookbook, friends and family can buy you a meal plan from Blue Apron so you and your spouse-to-be can get into the kitchen together. You can even request gift cards for Southwest Airlines flights or stays at an Airbnb—perfect for planning your honeymoon or your next romantic getaway.
The Knot — As a huge name when it comes to the wedding industry, it should come as no surprise that The Knot also created a killer universal wedding registry. One of its newest features is also what helps it stand out the most. The Newlywed Fund allows your guests to gift you with cash for different experiences or more expensive items of your choice. It’s perfect for the couple who already has the silverware set and knife block of their dreams; they can create a fund for the bathroom remodel they’ve been dreaming of, their honeymoon trip, or even just for future date nights and experiences.
Blueprint Registry — Blueprint’s biggest advantage is not-so-subtly hidden right in its name. When most people plan their wedding registry, they tend to group things in a logical order—kitchen products together, tech accessories together…you get the idea. With Blueprint, you can step this concept up a notch by actually grouping together all of your similar items in a visual blueprint of the room they’ll go in. You can plan out your registry room by room, and your friends and family can easily browse your selections in the same way.
MyRegistry.com — MyRegistry.com allows you to combine the ease of creating an online registry with the traditional fun of shopping in a store. As you’re browsing a store in person, you can use the MyRegistry.com app to scan the barcodes of items that you like so they can instantly be added to your registry with the benefit of you seeing them in person first. Even better is that you can also add items without barcodes by taking a picture for the registry and writing a note about where your friends and family can find them.
Creating and Managing Your Registry
Once you’ve picked out which registry works best for you, the fun can begin—choosing the items and experiences you want on your list. Although it sounds like a dream come true, it can actually be a surprisingly difficult process. When creating your registry, here’s what you should keep in mind.
Take inventory.
You can’t pick out things that you need without first figuring out what you have. Coffee maker on the fritz? Need new dishes because you’ve broken all of yours over time? Start building your registry with things that you truly need and then home in on things that are less of a necessity and more of a luxury.
Vary the price points.
Let’s be real: Your co-worker isn’t going to buy you a Vitamix blender or a $200 Anthropologie quilt. When selecting items for your registry, it’s important to pick things that encompass a variety of price points so that anyone looking to get you a gift can feel comfortable doing so.
Think outside the box.
If you and your future spouse have already lived together for a while, there’s a good chance that you already have lots of things that might typically go on a wedding registry. While it’s a great opportunity to update some of your basics, it’s also your chance to ask for things that are a little more unconventional.
Luggage
Whether you travel often or you’re in need of a new bag before your honeymoon trip, luggage can be a great addition to your registry.
Art
Are your walls a little bare or are you and your honey planning on moving into a new house after the big day? Add some art to the list.
Cash Funds
Give family and friends the option to donate to a certain experience or project—kitchen renovations, a snorkeling getaway on your honeymoon, or even the cooking lessons you’ve always wanted. You can use your chosen universal registry site for this or try Honeyfund.
Charitable Donations
Instead of a gift for you, ask your guests to make a charitable donation in your name to the charity of your choice. Need a few things but also want to give back?
Both The Good Beginning and CrowdRise are good options if you are looking to exclusively “register” for charitable donations to be made in your name. You can also register through The Knot Gifts Back program, which automatically makes up to a 3 percent donation to a charity of your choice with each gift purchased from your registry.
Register early and make updates.
You don’t have to create your entire wedding registry the day after you get engaged, but starting one earlier is better. It’s great for any friends or family members who’d like to buy you a gift for pre-wedding celebrations or for those who know they can’t make it to your special day.
You should also continue to update your registry as time goes on—not just to add things that you need or want but to give guests more options at different prices. And don’t worry, having a bigger registry isn’t greedy—it actually helps your guests out.
Registry Items
Now that you’ve figured out where to register and gotten a good idea of what you might want to ask for, the time has come to start building your list. You may have a few things in mind already, but we’ve put together a handy list to help you cover the basics—and even a few things you might not have thought of.
Dining
When it comes to your dining essentials, there are a few things to take into consideration. It’s more than just picking out items in a style you like—you’ll also want to consider how many people are in your household, whether you want to ask for extras in case you accidentally break a plate or glass, and things you know you’ll use every day but don’t already have.
Consider asking for:
- Dinnerware sets
- Flatware
- Steak knives
- Glasses
- Napkins
- Napkin rings
- Chargers
Get Started With Our “Dining” Registry Picks:
Entertaining
If you plan on having your family and friends over often, consider asking for pieces that will be handy when it comes to entertaining guests. When picking out your items, think about what types of gatherings you usually host and how many people you usually have over.
Consider asking for:
- Platters
- Ice bucket
- Coasters
- Wine glasses
- Wine accessories
- Cheese board
Get Started With Our “Entertaining” Registry Picks:
Cooking
If you’re a home chef, you may already have a well-stocked kitchen when it comes to the essentials. But if you’ve been thinking about upgrading your arsenal of ingredients and tools, now’s the time.
Consider asking for:
- Pots and pans
- Mixing bowls
- Measuring cups
- Casserole dishes
- Cooking utensils
- Cutting boards
Get Started With Our “Cooking” Registry Picks:
Small Appliances
If you already have plates, silverware, and glassware that you’re happy with, start thinking about bigger items that your kitchen is missing. You can even set up your wedding registry so that guests can contribute to the costs of larger items that you’ve been meaning to purchase.
Consider asking for:
- Blender
- Stand mixer
- Toaster
- Slow cooker
- Pressure cooker
- Coffee maker
- Vacuum
Get Started With Our “Small Appliances” Registry Picks:
Bedroom
Perhaps your bedding needs an upgrade, or maybe you’re looking to start sprucing up your guest bedroom. Whatever the case may be, bedroom items are perfect to add to your wedding registry because they’re essential and tend to vary in price.
Consider asking for:
- Lamps
- Bedding
- Pillows
- Rug
- Sheet sets
- Hamper
- Curtains
- Sound machine
Get Started With Our “Bedroom” Registry Picks:
Bathroom
Your bathroom is one of the most used spaces in your home, so you’ll definitely want to think about adding some updated essentials. Think about adding more decorative pieces, too, or even requesting money for renovations.
Consider asking for:
- Bath towels
- Hand towels
- Washcloths
- Bath mat
- Shower curtain
- Scale
- Wastebasket
- Vanity containers
Get Started With Our “Bathroom” Registry Picks:
Beyond the Basics
If you’ve already got all the essentials covered, now’s the time to get creative. As we said before, think outside the box when it comes to your wedding registry and add things you want but that people might not always think to get you.
Consider asking for:
Get Started With Our “Beyond The Basics” Registry Picks:
Don’t want or need anything?
Check out these sites and request that donations be made to the charity of your choice in your name:
Or start a cash fund through Honeyfund to receive money toward home renovations or a down payment, honeymoon plans, or other experiences.
Giving Thanks
Perhaps the most important part of the wedding registry process is remembering to thank everyone who spent the time and money picking something out for you. Keeping a gift log (you can download this one for free!) is a great way to track who got you what and at which event they gave it to you, so you can easily thank your co-worker Linda for attending your bridal shower and buying you a new Crock-Pot.
It’ll also help you out when you get a gift that you know you probably won’t use but still want to be appreciative of anyway. At the next family function, you can remind yourself to rave to your notoriously wacky aunt about the sweaters she crocheted for you, even if you’ve never worn them.
Though your family and friends will appreciate receiving any sort of thank you for a gift they’ve bought you, there is an ideal time frame during which your thank-you cards should be sent. As soon as possible is best, but you should aim to get them all sent out within three months after your honeymoon.
If you’re looking for thank-you card suggestions, we’ve linked some good options below. Or if you want something more personalized, we suggest Paper Culture or Paper Source, where you can customize your own thank-you card sets that will be printed on post-consumer recycled paper.
Sometimes life can feel like a Rihanna song—and not one of the fun sexytimes ones. If you all you do is work, work, work, work, work, you may be paying the bills, but when is the last time you actually did something that made you feel alive?
Some people have day jobs where they can kill two birds with one stone: They can pay the bills and get a creative outlet that fulfills their passions. Sixty percent of Americans even say they’re “completely satisfied” with their jobs.
But that leaves 40 percent of Americans who could use a little pick-me-up. Whether your secret passion isn’t a money-maker or you’re not comfortable giving up the benefits that come with full-time employment, there are still ways for you to do your thing in your off hours.
Ready? Set? Let’s do this.
Get a side hustle.
You may work 9 to 5, but if your employer’s not making use of your full range of talents, there’s no reason you can’t. In a 2017 study by Bankrate, an estimated 44 million Americans were working side hustles—extra gigs that bring in a little extra cash each month.
For some people, it’s a matter of making ends meet, but it can also be a way of making your passions profitable.
Put your volunteer hat on.
Maybe your dream of being a professional puppy birthday party planner will not make you any money, no matter how hard you hustle. But there’s likely a non-profit in your ‘hood that will take you on and let you fulfill some of those childhood dreams. Ask your local shelter if you can throw a puppy birthday–themed fundraiser. Turn your talent for boiling the perfect egg into producing mass quantities of goodies for your local community center’s Easter egg hunt. Put your penchant for planting to good use at the community garden.
Whatever you decide to do, don’t forget to check in with your employer. Many companies will provide a few hours off once a year (or more often) for employees to volunteer, while others may chip in a small donation. Your good deeds can not only fulfill you in your time off but help you feel more invested in your job.
Grab your backpack.
Adult student numbers are climbing at colleges across the U.S., thanks in no small part to the availability of online classes. Whether you’re looking to change your career entirely or just want to indulge your love of British literature or psychology, check with your HR department.
Many employers offer tuition reimbursement for employees. If your job won’t help with tuition, you can still search for scholarships or take non-credit classes for little or no money through programs like EdX.
Join the group.
You may not make it to Broadway. You may not be the next Maya Moore or Jonquel Jones. But your local theater group may be looking for someone with your acting chops to take on the Miss Hannigan role in their next production of Annie. And that group of ballers in your office may just need a point guard.
Plus, joining up won’t just let you live out your dreams. It may make you a new friend (or 12).
Just do it.
Ah, if only Nike slogans were real life. Whatever dream you’re chasing, don’t forget to give yourself permission to go for it. Yes, work is necessary. Yes, dinner needs to be made, and the kids need to be bathed. But it’s not merely acceptable to “do you.” It’s necessary. Still, you may need to kick-start yourself into action.
The key? Put it in writing (even if it’s “digital” writing). Carve out time on your Google calendar so no one schedules a late-afternoon coffee meeting when you’ll actually be rock climbing. Create a bullet journal, and start coloring in your to-do list. Write yourself some lists, post them on the fridge, and check things off when they’re done. The more you write down, the less wiggle room you give yourself to ignore your “me time.”
You recycle and compost. You keep A/C use to a minimum and barely drive. You’re a sustainable kind of woman—but now you’re wedding planning. (Congrats, by the way!)
You imagine a celebration with zero paper goods, reclaimed wood tables, a sustainable dress, herb centerpieces plucked from your garden, locally grown flowers…maybe something out in the woods? But how do you honor your environmental ideals while wedding planning—especially if you want a big one?
“Sustainability can mean a lot of things in the real world,” says Sasha Pollock, a climate policy consultant in Portland who had an eco-friendly wedding. “You have to consider it on a financial and personal level, too. How are we being environmentally sustainable while not making ourselves crazy and not spending a ridiculous amount of money?”
Her biggest wedding planning advice? Eliminate things that don’t matter to you. “Having a bunch of lavish flowers wasn’t a big deal for me. Neither was having a huge group of people who are all wearing the same dress, but having delicious food and really good drinks was a big deal, so that’s what we focused on financially.”
Kelsey Motes-Conners, a wedding designer and the founder and owner of Field: A Wedding Design Studio in Montana, agrees. She advises couples to work with one guiding principle: Decide what is really of value to you.
If you’re committed to a sustainable, eco-friendly wedding, wonderful! This might mean choosing a location that doesn’t force every person you know to fly 1,000 miles across the country; it might mean choosing locally sourced organic food that then gets donated to a homeless shelter; it might mean zero paper.
Unless you have an unlimited budget, you’ll have to make choices about where you want to put the bulk of your energy and finances, so sitting down and having numerous heart-to-hearts with your beloved (and perhaps a wedding planner!) will really help guide your choices.
Wedding Planning Step 1: Getting Started
If you want a giant guest list and party and have the means for it, go ahead, but there’s no need to go into massive debt while wedding planning.
Set a budget.
“One of the things that’s really difficult about setting a wedding budget is that people generally haven’t planned a wedding before,” explains Motes-Conners. It is not uncommon to find that the photographer who did your fantastic family portraits for a totally affordable price charges way more for wedding photography.
Motes-Conners says there are two ways to work within a budget while wedding planning, and only one is really effective: “Some people come to me before they’ve planned anything and say, ‘My budget is $20K.’ We can work within those parameters! But some fall in love with a space or launch into plans and book a venue before projecting all vendor costs.”
What happens then? Often there isn’t enough money left for…food. This is a particularly important part of sustainable wedding planning—some things will cost more (like food), but you might be able to save a bunch on other things (like going paperless or favor-less).
Pro Tip: If you know you want to work with a wedding planner, book her first, and have a transparent conversation about your vision, your budget, and what planning services will cost. Yes, this is an additional fee, but it might come out in the wash because of all the insider knowledge and the work they will take off your plate: “Planners have the best pulse on what venues and vendors will cost in their region.”
Don’t want a wedding planning expert by your side? That’s fine, but downloading a wedding planning calculator from your favorite wedding planning website might not be of much use. “Prices vary from place to place and venue to venue, so you need to get actual costs associated with particular vendors to set your budget.”
Bonus Pro Tip: “Your sanity is part of sustainability,” Pollock says. “If you lose it, it’s all for nothing.” Throughout the odyssey that is wedding planning, keep the marriage in mind, instead of laser-focusing on every small detail.
Use an app.
Wedding planning involves a lot of moving parts, so keeping all the information in one place (especially if you don’t have a planner) is key. Motes-Conners recommends Aisle Planner. She also suggests using websites that are local to your area instead of a giant well-known website, which are straight-down-the-rabbit hole fun. Not only will the finances be more accurate, but the advertisers on the site will probably also be local.
Create a wedding website.
This is an easy-as-pie way to keep people in the loop without having to send a gazillion follow-up emails or using a smidge of paper! (More on that later.) SquareSpace has a lovely template. Zola also provides clear, functional designs. And, of course, there are always the experts at The Knot!
Don’t forget about your mental health.
Has anyone told you wedding planning is stressful? Kidding! Everyone knows this!
A lot of the stress comes from—you guessed it—finances, and it can drive you to the brink. “The question of who is going to pay for what is more fluid now than it was 50 years ago,” Motes-Conners explains, “so often it comes with a different set of expectations.” In other words, when the father of the bride once paid for the whole thing, he had a lot of say. No more.
Pro Tip: It’s important to be clear about why you’re making these kinds of wedding planning choices—with yourself, with your partner, and with those contributing financially, especially if being sustainable is your top wedding planning priority.
“I always tell my clients to ask themselves, Why? Why this wedding for you?” This helps when you feel like you have to justify certain costs and decisions to those who might be helping you foot the bill. You want to be able to go to your parents, in-laws, or grandparents and say, This is why we’re doing it this way, This is what’s meaningful to us, This is what we want our day to be about. “That can soften the blow when your mom wants you to have four-tier lemon cake and you want a raspberry tart made by your best friend,” Motes-Conners explains. “You can frame it in larger context of what’s meaningful to you.”
Wedding Planning Step 2: Picking Your Vibe and Vendors
Even your venue will affect how environmentally friendly your wedding is. From multiple vendors coming to set up in the hours or even days ahead to guests who might be traveling across town or across country, all of it has an environmental impact.
Picking the Location
“Consider the guests’ air and car travel,” Motes-Conners says. “What might that carbon footprint look like?” It’s lovely to plan a low-key wedding with recycled paper, organic food, and few guests in the Bahamas, but what kind of environmental cost will it be for everyone to fly there? Is there a more central place that would be more environmentally responsible?
Then think about what the venue will require. Heating and cooling costs might come to around the same amount—a wedding in New York City in July or in January might amount to the same fees in A/C or heating bills!—but planning an outdoor wedding at least saves you some of that environmental impact.
That said, it’s not that simple. If you have a simple backyard wedding, you may not be heating an entire hall (hooray!), but you might be throwing away hundreds of paper plates, napkins, and even more plastic utensils and cups. You’ll have to weigh the cost and ease of using disposable supplies versus glass and china and choose the option that makes the most sense to you.
Pro Tip: In contemplating a venue, you want to consider where your guests will be staying. Can they stay on site or nearby to avoid driving to and from venue? Some weddings—at, say, a resort or a summer camp—are set up in such a way that most (if not all) guests stay on the premises. This obviously cuts down a lot on travel time and on fossil fuels!
Picking the Caterer
You want the food to be good. For a lot of couples, this is a non-negotiable, and other areas can be cut back on to grow the food budget. But there are other food requirements to consider when it comes to eco-friendly wedding planning.
You can work with a caterer who sources locally and organically and who only uses produce that’s in season. A great eco-friendly caterer will help you shape a menu that’s seasonal to your chosen location. “These days, a lot of caterers are working with local farms and ranches and do a good job of focusing on more sustainable agriculture,” Motes-Conners explains. The same goes for local breweries and wineries.
“We made sure our caterer used non-disposable plates and glasses and the food was locally sourced,” Pollock says. “In some people’s minds, having a vegan wedding might be better. We had chicken and bacon, but it was sustainably grown.”
Be sure to ask the caterers what they do with the leftover food. Some will donate it to a homeless shelter or local food bank. Some will pack it up and give it to guests to have for lunch the next day. (But again: What is it being packed up in?) Some may even compost it. The bottom line: You don’t want all that extra stuff to end up in a landfill.
And if you aren’t into wedding cake? A few options: If you’re going really local, consider ordering various cakes, pies, donuts, or cupcakes from your favorite local bakeries. This way you have a variety! If you have friends who are wonderful bakers, ask if they will bake a cake or pie (or two!) as their gifts (you’ll have to ask a few baking friends). This can be an extremely meaningful contribution to the day.
Picking the Flowers
How “green” you can be when ordering wedding flowers depends entirely on where you are in the country and what time of year it is. If you’re looking at a January wedding in North Dakota, it might sadly be hard to find local flowers! “If you’re in New York, Seattle, or Los Angeles, for example, where you have access to a flower market, it will be much easier to be flexible about flowers in the way that you have to be if you want seasonal, locally grown flowers,” Motes-Conners explains.
The seasonality and availability of specific flowers naturally depends on moisture and weather in your area. If you have your heart set on something very specific as you’re wedding planning, your florist’s job is to make that happen, but that might mean flying it in from South America or the Netherlands, which will cast a large carbon footprint.
According to Motes-Conners, farmer florists are gaining momentum. In places with longer growing seasons, florists are branching out into farming so they can raise and grow flowers to design with. This is sustainable and gives back to local economy. But it comes with a different mentality—your priority is getting something local rather than the exact bouquet you want.
Wedding Planning Step 3: Choosing Your Crew
It is such an honor to be a bridesmaid—and sometimes, it is a royal pain in the you-know-what. Bridezillas. Money flying out of your bank account. Travel to various ends of the earth. Party after party—all of which you’re supposed to plan!
Generally your besties will be honored to help you with every step of wedding planning. They’ll probably look forward to celebrating you, helping you find a dress or pantsuit, and standing by you as you say your vows to your beloved. But not if you ask too much of them.
“Be really conscious of your expectations,” Motes-Conners says. “What are you asking people to do? Honoring people you love is wonderful, but there seems to be a trend of really overblown financial expectations—fly to the Bahamas for the bachelorette party, fly to Portland for the bridal shower, fly somewhere else for the wedding.” Most people in their twenties and thirties simply cannot afford this, and even if they can, they might not want to spend their hard-earned cash this way.
A few suggestions:
- Go first tier only. This might sound terrible, but only ask your very, very, very closest friends, and keep the number small—like three or four. Especially if you’ve all known each other for decades, it will likely create an intimate planning atmosphere.
- Forget about bridesmaids! This might seem radical, but I did it and it was wonderful. This isn’t to say that I didn’t have my sister and best friends supporting me, but I found it too difficult to choose and didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Instead I offered people honors that suited their personalities and skills: Read a poem, Hold a leg of the Chuppah, Read a blessing, Sing a song, Sign the Ketubah. Bonus: No one had to wear matching dresses.
- Ask your siblings! All of them—brothers and sisters alike. In theory, they will be there anyway, and there’s no logical reason why your sibling of a different gender shouldn’t stand up there with you.
- Only have a maid/man of honor. One person: your sibling or best friend. Simple.
Pro Tip: Don’t ask friends to be in your wedding party too early, especially if you’ll have a long engagement. What if you have a fight and the relationship deteriorates? You might have to ask her to “resign.” Yikes!
Wedding Planning Step 4: Getting the Gowns (and Tuxes)
This is the part many women love most during wedding planning: buying the dress. The most sustainable thing you can do is wear vintage, but there are plenty of sustainable wedding dress designers, and it’s great to put your money where your ethics lie. First and foremost, you need to choose what’s important to you. For instance, Pollock bought a new wedding dress, but her attendants wore dresses they already owned.
Everyone loves a wedding dress. Nobody likes the wedding dress prices. Let’s talk about other options:
- No carbon footprint option: The most sustainable (and cheapest) option? Let your bridesmaids wear dresses they already own. You can choose a color palette (say, fall colors) and let them go hog wild. If they want to buy something new, great! But it’s their choice.
- Renting: You can look into renting bridesmaid dresses from Rent the Runway or Vow to be Chic. Dresses that sell for hundreds or thousands can be rented for under $100.
- Menswear: Men can rent tuxes from Nordstrom’s The Black Tux. No need to spend money and cloth on something you’ll only wear once.
- Sustainable Materials: More and more dresses are being made from eco-friendly fabrics. A good place to start is Reformation, but H&M now has an eco-conscious wedding collection, too!
- Go Vintage: Wear something that’s already been worn! Cut up your mom’s old wedding dress, or dive into consignment or vintage stores.
Pro Tip: Beyond renting and buying used, it’s nice to think about small design houses and local designers, ateliers, or shops. In terms of carbon footprint, that probably has a smaller impact than renting because even when you’re renting a wedding dress, it’s probably being shipped back and forth for fittings and for the return, so it’s not as eco-friendly as you might think.
Wedding Planning Step 5: Sharing The News
Invites, RSVP cards, ceremony program, seating chart, menu—how much of this crap do you really need? Especially if you’re thinking about all that paper.
As with all things related to wedding planning, focus on your priorities. If you think you don’t need paper, beautiful place cards, or menus printed, don’t do it! Paperless Post has gorgeous invites (and people don’t have to send anything back in the mail!). You can put the seating chart and/or the menu on a big chalkboard.
That said, these things can be lovely if the aesthetic is something you’re drawn to, and you can go with 100 percent recycled products. “I’m a printmaker by training,” Motes-Conners says, “so I love to feeling of paper, love printing texture. And by and large, there’s not a giant amount of paper.”
Pro Tip: For the love of all things holy, do not include seeds in the invitation (or in anything else). You don’t always know what kinds of seeds you’re getting and whether they will be safe in a different kind of soil. It could be an invasive species not meant to grow there, and actually cause environmental harm!
Wedding Planning Step 6: The Big Day
Putting Your Face On
You made it! The big day is here! After focusing so much on sustainability, don’t forget about what’s going on your face. To keep the theme going, opt for eco-friendly beauty brands that are ethically produced (no animal testing!). We recommend Tarte: Their products are never tested on animals and their expansive vegan-friendly line uses plant-based ingredients chock full of minerals, vitamins, and essential oils for a glow you can feel good about.
Giving Out Favors
The only favors that are universally appreciated? Edible ones! Remember that your guests are often traveling by plane so it’s sort of, let’s say, inconsiderate to give them creams, gels, or liquids—so as nice as it is to get locally sourced honey or maple syrup, you have to think about how they’ll get it home. Edibles (I’m talking cookies, chocolate, tea, or coffee) also don’t leave a lot of plastic behind, and probably won’t end up in the trash.
Pollock made wedding crackers—by saving toilet paper rolls for six months! One night she and her fiance had friends over, and in three hours they assembled over 100. Inside they inserted a recipe for old fashioneds—their favorite drink. It took more planning time, but was totally worth it to them.
Wedding Planning Step 7: Finding Your Focus
In the midst of all this wedding planning, it’s sometimes easy to overlook the most important thing: your marriage!
For most couples, the wedding planning and the ceremony only marks the beginning of your partnership. “If the idea of having all these people that you love get together and witness the fact that you’re actually getting married is important to you, then it’s worthwhile to invest yourself emotionally—not just financially!— in your wedding,” says Motes-Conners. “Use it as an opportunity to connect with people in your life who mean something to you and your partner, and have it be a galvanizing moment amidst the chaos of all those people in one space. You get to determine how meaningful your wedding is and what it means.”
There is something unspeakably powerful about the people you love being there to witness you moving into this next phase of your life and knowing they will be there when things get tough. The onus is on you to set the tone as you’re wedding planning. The guests are making a major investment to celebrate you and it’s vital that you honor their commitment. “Your marriage and wedding are, in most respects, two different things, but where they intersect is up to you.”
If you want to talk minimalism, talk to Lauren and Jamie Eichar. After getting rid of nearly everything they owned, they moved into a 160-square-foot vintage Airstream and have been traveling around the United States in it since January 2018.
Let’s back up a bit.
I first learned about the Eichars from stalking their Instagram. They are professional wedding photographers, so these small glimpses into their lives do look pretty Pinterest-perfect. The pictures of their Airstream (which was designed, built, renovated, and named June(!) by The Modern Caravan) have the neutral color palette and natural afternoon lighting down pat. Their whole feed looks perfectly curated. At first glance, you might think: Who are these perfect people? Nobody lives like that.
Well, actually, the Eichars do live like that. And if you read the captions of their ‘grams, you’ll start to notice that they’re doing more than just posting pretty pictures. In the age of sponsored partnerships and constant #ads, they’re also writing about the stuff that a lot of people aren’t—things like maintaining a photography business on the road, what they still own (and things they still want), the strengths and weaknesses of their relationship, and how they really feel about social media.
Hearing Lauren and Jamie describe their lifestyle made me think about what I post on social media. My Instagram is mostly pictures of my daughter, but I’m definitely guilty of taking dozens of photos (of my food, myself, a random window—you name it) to get that just-right shot, which completely takes me out of the moment.
At this point, most of us know that what we choose to share on the internet shapes how the world sees us, and eventually it can start to shape how we see ourselves too. The Eichars recognized this in themselves, so they’ve made different choices: to live small and slow and to document the good and bad things as they see fit instead of constantly staging moments for photo ops.
Jamie and Lauren also talk a lot about minimalism. That concept is, for all intents and purposes, foreign to me. I love how Scandinavian living rooms look on Pinterest, but putting minimalism into practice has never felt doable (or desirable) for me.
I’ve been called a packrat several times since childhood. I hang on to notes, doodles, receipts, and books I’ll never read again. I indulge in retail therapy regularly. The floor of my room usually looks like a Forever 21 dressing room after Black Friday. I own a few too many throw pillows. I’m more of a maximalist, but thanks to how the Eichars share their lives, it starts to feel a little more attractive—and attainable.
The Eichars don’t just see minimalism as an aesthetic; for them, it’s more than just getting rid of a certain number of things in a certain amount of time or creating a precious, unlivable space that looks like it came from a catalog. Instead, their minimalism focuses on making intentional choices about possessions, plans, and people.
Their version is about living in the moment, embracing the (itty-bitty) space they’ve created, and making time for the people who matter most, no matter where they are in the world or how many Instagram followers they have. It’s about getting rid of the unnecessary, whether that’s a physical item or the impulse to win the rat race.
Of living in a beautiful Airstream and photographing the lesser-seen parts of our country, Jamie says, “We recognize that this lifestyle is often perceived to be about the adventure, living the dreamiest life, and moving from one cool thing to the next. That’s not what it’s about for us.”
I talked to them about all of this—what it is about for them, including living slow, focusing on each other, and the lessons they’ve learned. As in their Instagram captions, they were delightfully honest about all of this (and more).
This interview has been lightly edited and condensed for clarity.
What led you to sell all of your things and live in an Airstream?
Jamie: Lauren and I had been exploring minimalism as an idea for a while and slowly purging things from our life. We focused on getting rid of anything that felt unnecessary to our experience. If it didn’t serve a purpose or bring a sense of joy to our life, why keep it? The obvious fear is that each thing we purchase has value and gets attached to our lives in a way that we don’t even realize we are holding on to. Most of the time those things are just cluttering up our space mentally and physically. So this practice of getting rid of our things was about shedding the feeling of having our identities attached to the things we own.
Lauren: We became more clear on what’s important. For us, living in an Airstream is about experiencing, learning, and growing as people. When Jamie and I started talking about changing our lives a year ago to live a more fulfilling life, I was in a place where I was ready to say yes to living tiny. I had let go of the things in my life that were holding me back before.
Jamie: We knew we wanted something different from the average life. It’s so easy to get sucked into what is safe and comfortable. Being self employed, becoming minimalists, and already knowing what it is like to spend so much time together, it seemed like a natural next step to try living this lifestyle.
Lauren: As we talked through options of living tiny or living in a mobile home, we followed our favorite Airstream renovators (The Modern Caravan) on Instagram and got extremely lucky with the timing that they decided to sell their own home. We put a deposit down on June and did one last huge garage sale to pare down.
Jamie: We were scared, but when the perfect Airstream came up for sale, we couldn’t hold back. We took the leap and jumped in head first.
How do you maintain fewer possessions as time goes on?
Lauren: I’ve gotten in the habit of paring down my items often. I look at my stuff in categories: clothing, sports equipment, kitchen, games, office supplies, photography equipment, camping gear, crafts, and decorations. I’ll go through each category of items every few months or so and make sure that we still love and use everything in that group.
Jamie: As time goes on, just like in everyone’s life there are moments where you feel like you don’t have enough. Our whole lives we have been trained to fill our sense of lack with buying objects. That feeling doesn’t just go away as soon as you get rid of things in your life … Because the space we live in is so limited, we just can’t buy any more things unless we get rid of something. We really have to face the reality of what is going on. We aren’t buying something because we need it, we are buying something to fill a void that we are not enough as we are. Being forced to face that feeling, we have learned to look at the parts of us that would normally be hidden behind buying things: lack of self-worth, feelings of not knowing who we are, feelings of not feeling loved. As we face those feelings and embrace who we are with a sense of gentleness, the need for things starts to dissipate and the yearning to work on our self-awareness, selflessness, and growth as human beings starts to become our focus.
What was your biggest fear before making the jump? How do you feel about those anxieties now?
Jamie: My biggest fear before jumping into this life was the unknown. Any big change like this, you don’t know what it will actually be like until you do it. I was fearful of the simple logistics of it. How do you tow a 27-foot Airstream? What truck do we need? How do we find campsites that work for us? Will this lifestyle be too expensive for us? What happens when something breaks? What is it like to live and be in 160 square feet? All those questions swirl around until you’re really in it.
Lauren: My biggest fear was around the financial factors of this decision. It’s still my biggest fear. We spent almost six years in St. Louis, establishing ourselves and our business, and left. We now have to figure out how to sustain this lifestyle and support ourselves on the road with our business. It’s a big game of trust-as-we-go.
Jamie: Looking back on those fears, I’m happy we were thinking so much about them. As much as I’d like to say it was all dreamy and perfect once we made the leap, it wasn’t. We’ve had to face all those fears head on and there have been some very stressful, tough moments. But no matter what, we have been able to work through them.
What do you miss about living “traditionally”?
Jamie: There isn’t much I miss about living traditionally. The only one that really comes to mind is that we don’t have access to a long powerful hot shower. It sounds silly, but sometimes those long, cozy showers are the best way to unwind after those stressful days.
Lauren: The only thing I miss about living traditionally is the bathroom. I miss flushing toilets (now we take care of our own #1 and #2) and I miss spreading out as I shower (not being hunched over and needing to jump out of there quickly).
Disclaimer: Just so you know, if you order an item through one of our posts, we may get a small share of the sale.
What are some positives you didn’t expect to gain from this experience?
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Lauren:
1. Jamie and I have grown closer. Because we’re living in a small space, we have to face our arguments right then and there, and there’s no escaping our issues. It feels like we’re more on the same team now than ever before. We both love contributing to this lifestyle and to each other. We go through a lot of hard days together and we go through a lot of amazing days together. All of those days are good for our relationship.
2. The Airstream and RV community is amazing! We’ve made a lot of friends on Instagram and in real life. During our first two weeks with June, our Airstream neighbors in our RV park helped us with everything that was coming up for us or that was new for us. When we post about some challenge we’re having, we get tons of people in the community chipping in with advice or ideas.
3. Falling in love with our country. I didn’t know how beautiful the U.S. was until buying our Airstream. I’m so grateful for the opportunity to take our home wherever we go. We’re finding ourselves in the most stunning locations and just can’t get enough of life on the road.
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How do you stay healthy in a small space?
Jamie: Staying healthy can definitely be a challenge in a tiny space. Fortunately for us, we have a fully functioning kitchen. We are able to keep most of the foods we would get in our traditional life pre-Airstream. The only sacrifice we made is that we do not have a freezer or microwave, so quick, frozen meals aren’t an option. Probably for the better though.
Lauren: Eating healthy is Jamie’s thing. He’s inspired me a lot with his commitment to eating healthy and eating vegetarian. Three years ago I quit drinking soda (I was very addicted to Pepsi), and now I try to just be a little more intentional about what I eat. I’m still a french fry–obsessed human being, so definitely don’t come to me for tips on eating healthy.
Jamie: Working out isn’t any more of a challenge than anywhere else; we just have to be motivated, which seems to be the challenge for most of us. But if we are able to get motivated, we have the outdoors to go on a run, do some yoga, or do a bodyweight workout. We definitely don’t do anything workout wise inside the Airstream—it’s too small for anything like that to happen.
Lauren: I have been on a grand adventure of learning about self-care recently, and as I read The War of Art and as we talk about a future with a family one day, I get more interested in being a person that fights the resistance in my life. Working out has given me the [opportunities for] self-care that I need to start off my day.
How do you deal with feelings of loneliness or isolation?
Lauren: When I experience loneliness, it hits me really hard. I’m an extrovert and a major people person. Recently I’ve been learning about facing my ego and my pain in a way that helps me work through it rather than fixing it quickly or avoiding it. I do this by letting myself sit with and sit in the feeling of loneliness. I try to allow myself to be lonely and not judge that that’s the feeling coming up for me. I fail at this a bunch, and I end up using Jamie as a crutch to help me by talking it out with him.
The moments that I’ve sat with my loneliness have been eye opening for me to learn more about myself and to learn how to love myself with ego and all. This is a topic I could talk a lot more about, but to keep it simple, it’s something I continuously work on and learn from.
Jamie: Most times, for Lauren and me, having each other is enough. But we can get on each other’s nerves or end up fighting; you just crave time with other people. We have been pretty intentional about scheduling time in locations where we have friends or family nearby so that we can have that balance in our lives.
If we aren’t able to be with others though, just accepting that we feel lonely can be enough to get us through it. That may sound strange, but just allowing something to be allows it to be okay.
How important is community to you? How do you maintain that in a nontraditional living situation?
Jamie: Community for us is important but it hasn’t felt like we’ve been without it. In fact the greater Airstream community on social media has really supported us and we feel the love and connection to them.
As far as the other communities in our life, it’s about making sure—even though we are often far away from friends and family—that we stay in touch in whatever way we can. FaceTime and phone calls are a must.
Lauren: Community, family, and friendships are very important to us. Living on the road definitely makes me miss everyone back home. It makes me miss my improv comedy group. It makes me miss the soccer girls I coached. It makes me miss our close friends. And most of all, my brother, who recently started living in St. Louis before we left for this journey. We do a good job at staying in touch with everyone and making plans to visit St. Louis or have friends visit us.
Although [it’s] hard, it was more important for us to start living this dream of ours than to stay in a place we didn’t feel inspired by anymore. Two months in, and we’ve gained an amazing new community of people on the road.
How has the ability to travel wherever, whenever impacted your worldview?
Jamie: So often we think we have to live according to the rules of society, but in reality this is your life, and you make up the rules. Lauren and I try to look at the rules that have been impressed upon us by school, parents, or society that we live by subconsciously, and if it doesn’t hurt someone, we see if it’s worth shifting how we do something.
With that, we try to recognize how privileged we are to be living this life. Making sure we don’t take it for granted and really be present in it is a really important aspect of this experience.
Lauren: As we travel, we try to grow and learn from the experiences we have. For example, now when we go to Native American–owned parklands, we’ll try to learn about the history of the land and do our best to respect and appreciate it. We’ve had experiences of visiting gorgeous land with the goal of just getting pretty photos and left feeling icky about the way we experienced that place. Now we’re visiting locations with the goal of being present and being grateful.
What’s your advice for people who want to make travel more of a priority but need to stay rooted to a home base?
Lauren: Keep your dreams and goals in mind as you work, save money, and spend money. When there’s a purpose behind the days you spend at home and the work you do, I believe you’ll be able to get closer to making those dreams a reality.
Jamie and I spent six years talking about our dreams together while living in St. Louis. Even though we didn’t know exactly how everything would work out or look, we knew we were inching closer and closer to something that felt more fulfilling to us.
What’s your advice for people who can’t live out of an Airstream but still want to cut down?
Jamie: If you are interested in exploring minimalism and starting to cut out things in your life, my advice is to just start. There are many different methods of minimizing; find one that gives you a few tools and go for it. It’s so easy to look at an idea or concept and get inspired, but often people don’t take action. Go up against your resistance and give it a go. Start with one area of your life and test it out. Minimizing and getting rid of things isn’t something that ends up being right for everyone, but you never know until you try it.
[noads]
Lauren:
1. Take your time with it and get in the habit of getting rid of things. Marie Kondō, author of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up has you do a big haul in one day, and for me that was helpful, but I needed a few years and few hauls. I got in the habit of getting rid of items about once a month, and by the time we were talking about living in an Airstream, it didn’t feel like such a scary thing to live with much less items in 160 square feet.
2. Be kind to yourself. If you’re not ready to let go of something, there’s nothing wrong with that at all.
3. Get in touch with your feelings around your possessions. Once I started realizing how things I owned made me feel, it was easier to see if the item was actually necessary in my life. Marie Kondō describes this as keeping only what “sparks joy.”
4. Have fun with the process! Minimalism is my passion. It’s become fun for me because I’ve been able to refine my taste and style and get to know myself through the process. It feels refreshing to live with less.
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What have you learned about yourselves throughout this process?
[noads]
Lauren:
1. I’ve learned that I’m better at self-care when I am living a more purposeful/meaningful life. If I’m present enough to take care of myself first before I start the work day or before Jamie and I go off on an adventure, I have a much better day and I can give my all to the day and the work that needs to be done. That’s been a major focus of mine while we’re learning how to set routines in the Airstream.
2. I’m learning that I rely on other people for my happiness. This is something I still struggle with and try to face. I’m able to see how much this is the case with Airstream life because I struggle with loneliness more than I did when living in a city filled with people I loved.
3. I’m much better off working through my issues rather than pretending that they’re not there. I used to do the latter and it didn’t go so well. One example I’m working on is accepting the fact that I can be passive aggressive and really making an effort to tell people how I feel when I’m hurt rather than holding frustration in and hoping that they know that they hurt me.
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What’s the hardest or the most important lesson you’ve learned?
Jamie: One major lesson that’s worth sharing—that we actually knew before jumping into this life—is the simple fact that living in an Airstream and traveling wasn’t going to solve all of our problems. No matter how perfect something looks on social media, it isn’t actually that way in real life for those people.
Yes, we go to beautiful locations and take pretty pictures, but our life and our challenges are the same as they would be anywhere else. We have hard days, we have sad days, we have extremely happy days.
Really, if anything, this lifestyle forces you to see where you need to grow and what you need to work on as a person because of how often you are challenged. We’ve come across so many people that want to live this life, and we are always up for encouraging others to go for it. But we also just want to be real about it and share that it can be really hard at times too.
Lauren: One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned in jumping into Airstream life is that no lifestyle will solve my problems. I’m learning that nothing gets easier or better without facing my ego and facing resistance. There’s no way around that. It’s a constant battle, and the learning and growing doesn’t stop. In a way that lesson is also a beautiful aspect of life.
Before moving into June, I was planning on having this life make my insecurities go away, give me motivation to get out of bed, work out, and meditate, start taking better care of myself. These things don’t come easier now. They just are easier to see now that there’s less stuff around and now that Jamie and I have to work though every little thing that comes up because there’s no running away.
The opportunities are there for me to work on myself, and that’s both hard and beautiful.
If you want to learn more about the Eichars and June, follow them @eichars_explore.
You may have a patch of tomatoes and kale flourishing in your backyard during the summer months, frequent the outdoor market every Sunday, and belong to a CSA, but you’re not exactly a farmer…yet. Planned communities with working farms at their centers, or “agrihoods,” are the next stage in committed, sustainable living, and they’re beginning to crop up all around the country as more and more young people are interested in having a connection with where their food comes from.
Of course, a community built around farming is hardly a new concept in itself. Throughout much of the world’s history, the population either grew its own food or lived in immediate proximity to the farmers who did, with the result being that even without a lot of money, community members could have access to fresh, healthy produce, milk, eggs, and so on. In other words, farming communities were the norm.
According to Richard Lingeman’s Don’t You Know There’s a War On?, even as recently as World War II, neighborhood victory gardens produced some 40 percent of produce eaten by American families. Can you imagine what would happen if we could recreate those statistics again?
But by 2008, something profound occurred: for the first time in recorded history, more than 50 percent of the world’s population lived in urban centers rather than agricultural areas where fresh food abounds. This in itself doesn’t sound very scary, but some of the unexpected effects of urbanization have included a distressing lack of access to fresh, healthy foods in many urban centers and even “food deserts” which are, by definition, areas where residents live prohibitively far from places where they can buy fresh, healthy food, instigating reliance on highly processed alternatives available in gas stations and convenience marts.
Enter the emerging trend of whole communities planned around working farms. These agrihoods are becoming more and more popular in many parts of the U.S. In fact, an article in Business Insider even claims that agrihoods are to millennials what golf course communities have been to baby boomers. So are agrihoods a status-based lifestyle for the health-conscious wealthy, or a viable new model that can provide sustainable access to healthy, fresh food for all? The answer is both.
Reviving Troubled Communities With Fresh Food and Urban Farming
A case study: It’s no secret that the city of Detroit has been suffering in recent decades. Economic difficulties and the city’s declining industrial center have led to widespread poverty, abandoned homes and factories, and disintegrating neighborhoods. But sometimes the most inspiring things come from trouble. And that’s exactly what’s happening in Detroit’s North End, where the Michigan Urban Farming Initiative (MUFI) has been running what they call, America’s first sustainable urban agrihood, a project that not only provides free healthy food to people who need it, but also a means for promoting education and healthy communities. Sound pretty cool? It is.
The all-volunteer non-profit that is MUFI has heralded big changes in its home neighborhood, where two-square blocks of formerly vacant land has been transformed into “a three-acre agricultural campus,” anchored by a “two-acre urban farm that has produced more than 50,000 pounds of free produce since 2012 to more than 2,000 households, food pantries, churches, and businesses within two square miles of the farm.” These impressive figures come from David Darovitz, a volunteer communications director for MUFI who has been working with the organization for the last two years.
According to Darovitz, their agrihood, with the help of an average of 8,000 to 10,000 volunteers per year, has taken an area that was once a prime example of urban decay in the heart of a food desert and transformed it into a “working farm that feeds people in an area that used to be ignored and desolate.” It’s also a highly successful model of “adaptive reuse of the built environment.” Not only has MUFI turned formerly abandoned land into a sustainable and high-producing urban farm, its volunteers have also made impressive strides in rehabilitating and repurposing existing neighboring structures. Does this make you fantasize about what could be done with some of the run-down areas of your city? Me too.
Darovitz says they have markedly “enhanced the area by removing tons of debris left in and around abandoned houses and buildings near the farm,” as well as restored “a long-vacant former apartment complex into a Community Resource Center for residents and visitors.” It’s hard to find anything but good things to say about MUFI’s mission and methods, and they hope to serve as an example for future projects in other regions.
“We get many inquiries from people all over the world who want to understand what we do and learn from our model to employ at their location,” says Darovitz, adding that “we set up our model with the hope that others would replicate it.”
Lots of volunteers come from right in the neighborhood, but many travel from all over the world as well, says Darovitz, to “work on many projects from cutting grass, planting, harvesting crops, painting, various neighborhood clean-up projects, and much more.” The food is donated free of charge “to anyone who needs it with priority given to North End residents,” he explains, adding that the organization “feeds about 2,000 households annually.”
Here’s hoping this model spreads to cities in need all over the globe!
Farming and The High Life: The Upscale Agrihood Model
You may not live near Detroit, and you may be able to afford fresh, healthy food, but if you’re getting psyched to get involved in community-based agriculture, you may be able to find just what you’re looking for thanks to a different model.
While the Michigan Urban Farming Initiative is the first urban agrihood dedicated to helping transform its low-income community, recent years have also seen an impressive collection of more high-end lifestyle communities built around working farms, and young families are clamoring to move in.
I spoke with Kevin Carson, NorCal president of The New Home Company, the master developers behind The Cannery, an upscale agrihood in Davis, California. While The Cannery doesn’t have the same mission of benefitting a low-income community (costs for the cheaper row-houses in the community start in the mid $400,000 range, and larger single family homes in The Cannery’s Sage Neighborhood start at a base price of almost $800,000), the hundreds of homes in the planned community certainly have drastically altered the shape of the neighborhood.
In fact, Carson calls The Cannery “much more than an agrihood…[it’s] a model project for adaptive reuse.” The 100-acre site had formerly been the Hunt Wesson Tomato Packing Plant, explains Carson, saying, “When we developed the site three years ago, the plant had been demolished, and all that existed was the parking lot.”
Since 1999—when the Hunts Tomato factory and cannery was shut down—the area where The Cannery now flourishes had been an abandoned industrial property, doing little for the East Davis community. Now, in addition to its 7.4 acre working farm and 520 energy-efficient, eco-friendly homes, Carson says the 100-acre property that makes up The Cannery also includes walking and bicycle trails, a community clubhouse with a swimming pool, an amphitheater, and tons of parks and additional green space. But what’s it like to actually live there?
Carson says people who move to The Cannery are looking for “something different”—something more than cookie-cutter homes built around the ubiquitous water-sucking golf course. Health-focused community events, like fun runs around the beautifully and sustainably landscaped grounds, farm stands, and an annual harvest festival certainly make family fitness and healthy community engagement a bit easier.
In addition to the other luxe eco-amenities residents can enjoy, one of the biggest draws to Cannery life is the unparalleled access to fresh produce along with the knowledge that your food comes to you sustainably from literally around the corner, rather than being sprayed with chemicals and shipped to you from far away using loads of fossil fuels.
Sounds amazing, right? But if you’re like me, you may be looking at your long to-do list and wondering just how much work are you going to need to put in in order to reap the benefits of a farm in your backyard. While every agrihood is different, many lifestyle-focused, buy-in agrihoods leave the nitty-gritty of how engaged you want to be up to you.
For example, the Essencia Farm program in Orange County requires each participating household to work four volunteer hours per month and pay $200 per year in exchange for daily access to flowers and herbs, as well as weekly produce boxes. But according to Carson, the Cannery Urban Farm is run by the Center for Land-Based Learning, a county-run non-profit. So while there are volunteer days when community members can choose to work on the farm and get that close-to-the-land experience, the farm is “first and foremost operated by professional farmers.” So just by owning a home and living in the Cannery community, residents get the benefit of “food box days where fresh produce and eggs are available,” as well as “edible landscaping (fruits and nuts)” in every yard on the property. Talk about an idyllic lifestyle.
Interested? Look before you leap into an agrihood.
Are you considering a new home and a lifestyle change all in one swoop? Here are some important things to think about before making a move toward agrihood life:
How much time do you want to invest?
Every agrihood is different. Volunteer hours are required in some and not in others, but encouraging resident involvement is essentially an amenity, so it helps if you’re wanting to get your hands dirty and get into the spirit of things.
Do you want to talk to your neighbors?
More than just track houses with a farm at the center, agrihoods are planned neighborhoods, meaning that in addition to loving fresh food, residents of agrihoods tend to be interested in community. That means knowing both where your food comes from and knowing your neighbors. That doesn’t mean you can’t be an introvert and live in an agrihood, but it could be a greater incentive for chatty Cathys to jump on the bandwagon.
Are you willing to move far away?
Agrihoods may be popping up all over the country, but there’s definitely not one in every city yet. If you find yourself really wanting to commit to an agrihood, you may have to move to an entirely new state.
Are you thinking realistically or aspirationally?
It’s not hard to fantasize about waking up to fresh eggs, slicing homegrown zucchini into your dinner salad, and blissfully harvesting apples from the orchard next door with your kids on the weekends. But it’s also important to consider how big a change that would be. If you’re already knee deep in the organic, local food movement, becoming part of an agrihood community could be the logical next step. But if you’re just starting out on an eco-friendly and healthy eating journey, you could try a smaller step first before uprooting your life, like joining a CSA produce subscription program or getting a plot in your local community garden.
Either way, if inspiration for sustainable, healthy living strikes, why not take advantage of it and make a positive change? Agrihoods are great for the people who live in and love them and, so far, evidence suggests that they’re great for the larger community as well.
The local, organic food “trend” is growing and here to stay, Eve Turow Paul, an expert consultant, told The Washington Post. The phrase “urban farming” may seem contradictory, but in reality, it could change your life and even work to solve hunger issues in America. If you’re already dedicated to choosing organic, local foods whenever possible (and maybe even dabble in growing, composting, canning, and the joys that come along with these activities), you may be wondering how to become even more invested in the farm-to-table movement.
Are you ready to take the plunge? You can start with inspiration from the Charter for Compassion’s list of 12 compelling agrihoods to explore in the United States.
My name is Abby and I’m a podcast addict.
If I’m not sleeping, working, or with my family—and sometimes, gulp, even when I am—I have a podcast playing in the background. Moving to L.A. and becoming a mother has only intensified the addiction; what else would I do with all those endless hours on the freeway? Or while I hike? Or while I shop for and cook yet another dinner?
My obsession runs the gamut—from listening to the news to literary conversations to good old fashioned advice—but I also love any and all podcasts related to living a healthy life.
Here are a few favorites:
1. Headspace
Not a podcast, but a whole app! Learn to meditate wherever you are, any time of the day or night. Host Andy Puddicombe has the most soothing, reassuring voice, and once you’ve completed the initial 30 days of basic mindfulness meditation, there are dozens of programs to choose from including meditations on self-esteem, productivity, and calming down. Note that you can try Headspace for free, but will have to pay for a monthly or yearly subscription once the trial’s ended.
2. Metta Hour Podcast with Sharon Salzberg
Renowned meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg’s podcast isn’t a how-to. Instead, it is a platform for thoughtful conversations with today’s leading Buddhist and mindfulness meditation practitioners. My favorite episode: this conversation with writer and senior Buddhist teacher Ethan Nichtern.
3. Oprah’s SuperSoul Podcast
Who doesn’t need a little more Oprah in her life? The entire premise of this show is to live a more inspired, connected existence. Although the conversations are rarely about, say, eating more vegetables (although sometimes they are!), they always tackle some aspect of leading a more meaningful, whole, healthy life. Oprah interviews everyone from Buddhist nun Pema Chodron to President Jimmy Carter to Brené Brown.
4. Happier With Gretchen Rubin
Meet the queen of happiness hacks! Gretchen Rubin is obsessed with living a happier, healthier life. Every week she and her sister Elizabeth Craft explore how to do so, making suggestions from fitting in daily exercise to steering clear of the cookie tray at work. You can also crack open Rubin’s latest book, The Four Tendencies, in which she analyzes four different personality types and examines what helps each of us stick to our habits.
5. Yogaland Podcast
Hosted by yoga teacher Andrea Ferreti, each pod features an interview with a different giant from the yoga world and covers many aspects of the practice including poses (of course!), body image, positive thinking, and self-acceptance. Ferreti has a super sweet, relatable persona that makes for easy listening.
6. TEDTalks Health
Who doesn’t love a good TED Talk? This series features all the best talks on health, covering topics including the benefits of sleep, how to cope with depression, the secrets to living a longer life, and even…quinoa.
7. 10% Happier with Dan Harris
Are you a meditation skeptic? So was Dan Harris when he had an anxiety attack on air. This embarrassing moment prompted him to deal with his anxiety through meditation. The journalist interviews a different guest every week, and their interests and backgrounds represent a wide range—from Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche’s worldwide network of meditation centers to Moby’s music and activism. Harris’ smart, no-nonsense style can make even the most cynical person curious about the benefits of sitting down on the cushion.
8. Bite by Mother Jones
Did you read Eating Animals? Or The Omnivore’s Dilemma? If yes, this lovely podcast, hosted by Mother Jones editors and food and farming blogger Tom Philpott and billed as being for people who “think hard about their food,” is for you. During each interview, we learn about a different aspect of food production. Recent episodes have covered raw water, Brussels sprouts, and how you are what you eat. This is a wonderfully entertaining and informative listen.
Your dear friend just got engaged, and she breathlessly asks you to be one of her bridesmaids. You’re honored. After all, being a bridesmaid signifies how much your friend loves and appreciates you, and how she trusts you to be a part of her big day.
But before you start brainstorming ideas for bridal showers and bachelorette parties, you should consider something much less romantic: your budget.
Being a bridesmaid costs, on average, more than $1,000. If you have a friend who will be walking down the aisle soon, that’s a scary sum. Although we all want to be there for our friends, paying for dresses, hair, makeup, a bridal shower, and other wedding activities can take a real toll on your budget.
In order to keep your bridesmaid duties from becoming a financial burden (or worse, a strain on your friendship), it’s important to talk about financial realities and budgeting constraints before you commit to being in the wedding party.
“While there are certainly … factors to consider that override money, this should definitely be a part of the discussion,” says Marsha Barnes, a financial social worker and founder of The Finance Bar, which provides financial education to people in and around Charlotte, North Carolina. “It’s also important to note that over 50 percent of Americans don’t have $500 in a savings account; therefore, it’s never safe to assume that others are in a position of affordability to participate.”
It’s always hard to talk openly about finances in an emotional situation, and you probably don’t want to let your friend down. However, talking about your budget can make the entire wedding process easier for you, the bride, and your fellow bridesmaids.
Here are some tips for being a bridesmaid on a realistic budget:
Have the hard conversation.
Barnes recommends talking about the financial implications of being a bridesmaid right off the bat. For example, if your friend wants a black-tie wedding and a full-weekend bachelorette party, you can bet that being a bridesmaid is going to get expensive. If you are concerned about being able to cover basics costs—like the dress, travel to the wedding, and contributions to the shower—discuss that with the bride right away.
“In no way should bridesmaids feel uncomfortable with addressing this,” Barnes says. “While a wedding is a one-day event to celebrate and honor someone that you love, it is equally important to remember any personal financial commitments that will continue afterwards.”
Take an honest inventory of your own financial situation.
Before you commit to being part of the wedding party, honestly ask yourself whether you can afford the added costs. Weigh your current financial situation and how soon the wedding is. If it’s further off, that gives you more time to save—if not, it may cause undue stress and strain.
“I believe it’s safe to say that for people we love, it’s natural to have the desire of participating in their special moments,” Barnes says. However, that can negatively impact your financial future. “As with many holidays or birthdays that excite us, we always have to look at our finances from a realistic view.”
Barnes recommends asking yourself whether you have disposable income, or whether you’re willing to cut back on non-essential expenses to budget for being in the wedding.
“What are you willing to give up personally in exchange [for] being available personally and financially to participate?” she asks. “Maybe this is an opportunity to shave off some of your non-essential expenses for six months to a year, which will increase your chances of being able to take care of costs associated with your bridesmaid responsibilities.”
Don’t be afraid to DIY.
If you’re trying to keep costs under control, considering doing your own hair, makeup, and nails. For added cost savings, don’t stop there, says Kim M., 27, who has been a bridesmaid six times and a maid of honor twice.
“Have a family member or bridesmaid host the bridal shower, and ask the bridesmaids each to bring a dish,” she says. “Make favors instead of ordering them—bridal-themed cookies are always a hit, as are little craft bags filled with candy.”
Plan ahead.
A little planning can go a long way when you’re trying to stay on a budget. Kim recommends putting money aside for wedding-related expenses each week, even if it’s only $10. Shop for dresses early to avoid rush fees, and triple-check your measurements to avoid costly alterations.
If you do need to have your dress fitted, consider going outside the bridal boutique.
“I’ve heard of friends spending $100 or more to get a dress altered when my local cleaner is a wizard with even the most complicated dresses, and it has never cost me more than $30,” she says.
Set limits.
Everyone wants their friend’s wedding to be unforgettable, but it’s perfectly ok to sprinkle in a dose of reality, especially if the entire bridal party is on the same page.
“I have told a bride before, ‘We can’t have a destination bachelorette party.’ It was out of everyone’s budget,” says Sara B., 30, who has been in three weddings recently. “Luckily for us, she was understanding.”
Open communication will help protect your pocketbook and your relationships.
“Remember that the wedding is such an important day for the bride,” Barnes says. “However, there are necessary moments when we must stop to evaluate our own personal circumstances to determine if we are able to participate or accept all invites as a bridesmaid. Be forthcoming and transparent regarding how you are able to contribute so that post-wedding emotions or bitterness do not inflate for months or years to come.”
Almost 21 million people. It’s a shocking number, even more so when you realize it represents how many victims of human trafficking there are in the world today. At least a quarter of those are children, innocent kids forced into modern-day slavery.
In a nutshell? People are trapped, forced to work or have sex (or both) against their will, and often have no means of escape.
This is their life every day. Across the globe and right here in America, human trafficking statistics are on the rise. From 2015 to 2016 alone, there was a 35 percent jump in reported cases.
But for all the bad news, there’s a light in the dark. You don’t have to go back to college, take criminal justice courses, or join the local police department’s special victims unit to help.
Be a savvy buyer.
You already focus on buying healthy fruits and veggies and reading food labels. But do you know if the blueberries in your morning smoothie were picked by a child who’s being refused the right to attend school and have a normal childhood? If they’re coming from Argentina, they might be!
Check out the U.S. Department of Labor’s list of goods produced by child and forced labor in countries around the world before you hit the store. Refusing to buy those products takes money out of the pockets of traffickers and makes it less lucrative for them to enslave people.
Ask questions.
Those semi-weekly massages may be a crucial (and let’s face it, amazing) part of your complete wellness routine, but have you checked with your massage therapist to make sure she’s digging into your tight glutes because she wants to…not because she has to?
Just this past November, massage parlors outside of Raleigh, North Carolina, and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, made headlines for illegal trafficking busts. And it’s no coincidence: Massage parlors, farms, and sweatshop-type factories are highest on the list of place where you’re likely to find someone being trafficked.
Another hot spot is airports, as victimized people are often shuttled back and forth by their traffickers via airplanes, moved from their homes to far-flung places where they’re forced to work.
Your to-do: Pay attention and ask questions…during your massage or while you’re waiting for your flight.
Not sure what to look for? The U.S. State Department offers these potential red flags that someone is being exploited:
- Living with employer
- Poor living conditions
- Multiple people in cramped space
- Inability to speak to individual alone
- Answers appear to be scripted and rehearsed
- Employer is holding identity documents
- Signs of physical abuse
- Submissive or fearful
- Unpaid or paid very little
- Under 18 and in prostitution
If something’s not right, follow the adage “if you see something, say something.” You can call 911 or the National Human Trafficking Hotline at 888-373-7888. The latter is toll-free and open 24 hours, with people available to speak a number of languages to help answer questions.
Get on board.
Write a check. Call your local member of Congress and ask them to vote on important trafficking issues.
Or roll up your sleeves and lend a hand.
There are hundreds of non-profits across the country doing work to cut down on human trafficking, be it through work with kids or adults. Some organizations, such as Annie Cannons, address the aftermath for rescued victims, providing job training and a soft landing as they try to re-enter everyday life.
Other groups don’t even have trafficking as a focus but work to prevent it nonetheless.
Because statistics show that one out of six endangered runaways reported to the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children were likely child sex-trafficking victims, work with kids is especially vital in fighting traffickers in America. Organizations that work with at-risk teens, for example, can encourage them to stay in school and provide them healthy alternatives to risky behavior, which may keep them from ending up in a trafficker’s eyeline.
Every little bit makes a difference.
Ever feel like you spend your work days going through the motions, but not feeling emotionally invested in your tasks? You’re not alone—only about a third of American employees feel engaged or enthusiastic about their work according to a recent Gallup poll. Even if your job is comfortable, you probably fantasize about finding something more fulfilling to do from 9 to 5. But before you can pursue that dream, you need to figure out what you’re even passionate about—which is a big challenge on its own.
Portland-based personal branding and career coach Robin Cangie has some first-hand advice about how to find your passion. Before building her coaching business—a career she thrives in—she spent more than 10 years feeling less than satisfied in software marketing jobs.
“While there were things I liked—I had the chance to be creative and opportunities to write—it wasn’t authentic. It always felt like I was serving someone else, and I just wasn’t that interested in business-to-business software marketing,” she recalls.
However, the jobs did help her discover what she was actually passionate about: coaching others. She noticed that colleagues needed a bit of help building credibility with the public and the media, so she led coaching workshops to give them more confidence. Not only did she enjoy coaching others, she also discovered she was good at it—and eventually turned that passion into a business she devotes herself to full time.
“It sparked something in me I had never felt in a job before,” she says. “It was rewarding and valuable.”
Through her personal journey, as well as the journeys of her clients, she has developed some strategies that can help anyone discover their true calling. From learning the difference between a hobby and a passion to building a personal brand based on the things you love, here’s how to find your passion—and live it every day.
Learning the True Meaning
From an early age, you may have been encouraged to “do what you love.” But is “doing what you love” at work the only way to live your passion? Not necessarily, according to Cangie.
“Passion manifests itself in all kinds of ways,” she tells HealthyWay. “We tend to talk about it a lot in terms of career, but that’s a bit misguided. I like to think of passion as your life’s work. If you can find a career that leverages your passion, that’s great, but if you can’t or don’t want to do that, you’re not a failure.”
Passion can mean different things to different people, depending on where they are in life. For some, it might mean raising a family or giving back to the community. For others, it’s about pursuing a lucrative career or developing skills in the creative arts.
Cangie says when thinking about how to find your passion, you should consider pursuits that bring joy, connect you to a higher sense of purpose, and fill a need in society. But also be open to finding your passion in areas you wouldn’t expect.
“We tend to treat finding your passion like finding a perfect pair of jeans—try on enough of them, and eventually one will fit. But we’ve got it backward. We don’t find our passion so much as our passion finds us. It’s about doing good work and staying open to opportunities that arise from that, and it’s good news for those of us who don’t know what we want.”
Life’s Biggest Challenge
Many of us fall into one of two camps: We either have so many things we love that we don’t know how to narrow it down to one true calling, or we have no idea where to begin looking for our passion. Why is it so difficult to discover your passion?
“There are lots of reasons why people struggle with this, and a lot of it has to do with our society. We set expectations that everyone should find a passion before they graduate college, then go to a corporate setting and do it for someone else. It sets you up for disappointment, especially as you start your first jobs and don’t immediately find that one passion out there for you,” Cangie shares.
Figuring out what makes your heart sing can be overwhelming at first. To help you get started, Cangie suggests asking yourself a few questions:
- What do I really want?
- What am I good at?
- How can I best serve others?
- How can I meet my financial needs?
You could plot your potential passions on a Venn diagram (like this example from Cangie) to explore the ways in which they overlap. An idea that intersects two or more circles will serve as a starting point for pursuing and getting to know what you’re truly passionate about.
Could your hobby be more?
Hobbies give us the opportunity to pursue things we love or explore things that interest us. But are hobbies the same as passions?
“Hobbies can be a great outlet for pursuing passions, but they’re not necessarily the passions themselves,” says Cangie.
Wait, what? If I love photography, and spend my weekends shooting beautiful images of my neighborhood, wouldn’t that also be my passion?
“It’s a matter of [the] degree to which it’s fulfilling to you and serves others,” Cangie explains. “The difference between a hobby and a passion is that passion connects to a higher purpose and the outside world in some way. I love crafting, but I do it for me. But one of my passions—telling stories—brings me joy and provides a service to the world. That’s the difference.”
Don’t write off your hobbies as you work to find your passion. Instead, explore the bigger picture of what they bring to you and the world, and work to transform those realizations into a deeper understanding of your life’s purpose.
Hidden in Plain Sight
Sometimes your passion is right under your nose. It was for Cangie—she was already offering career and leadership coaching to colleagues at her company when she realized that’s what she absolutely loved to do. But how can you shine a light on something that’s hidden in plain sight?
“Start paying attention to things that bring you joy,” says Cangie. “Joy is a fertile ground for finding your passion. No matter what situation you’re in, there’s always an opportunity to feel joy and that allows passions to come in.”
You could also think about a time in your life when you felt you did your best work, she adds. A key moment of pride, like the time you threw an amazing event or produced an insightful report, might offer clues that point to what you’re passionate about.
“Think about what it was tapping into within you,” Cangie says.
However, finding your passion isn’t just about focusing on the positive. Your frustrations might also hint at a problem you’d be passionate about solving. For Cangie, her passion for coaching was tucked inside her frustration that the people she worked with struggled to see their own value.
“The people I was coaching at work couldn’t see how awesome they were. Through discussions with them, I helped them find a story that felt empowering, allowed them to reclaim their sense of agency, and see their own brilliance,” says Cangie.
In short: “Stop chasing your passion, and instead seek opportunities to do what brings you joy and follow your frustrations,” she says.
A Word on Advice
You look around and it seems like everyone has already found their passion. Your best friend is a successful wedding photographer who looks forward to every shoot; your mom is a nurse who feels fulfilled healing others; your sister, who recently gave birth to her second child, thrives as a mother and embodies it as her true calling. Should you ask them for advice on how to find your passion?
“Getting a really clear picture about what you are good at is difficult to do on your own. So, ask friends and family, ask a manager, ask a colleague, or even a good career coach—there are lots of people who can help you find what you’re really great at,” says Cangie.
An outside perspective gives you the chance to talk about things that are meaningful to you and dive into the deeper reasons that energize those feelings of purpose. For example, when one of Cangie’s clients told her she excelled at project management, the discussion led to a breakthrough realization about what she’s passionate about.
“We discovered that project management was a label that didn’t fully capture what she was really great at. Her real talent was getting groups of people together from different functions to achieve a common vision,” shares Cangie.
Keep in mind that everyone pursues a different path to their passion. While your loved ones who have it all figured out might be able to explain how they got there, only you can forge your own journey toward deep personal fulfillment.
Building Your Brand
Branding isn’t just for businesses—it’s a useful tool that can help you focus on your passion.
“Personal brands are a kind of story you tell about yourself. It changes over time as you do,” says Cangie.
A strong personal brand can unite all of your passions under one umbrella. While coaching and storytelling serve as the foundation for Cangie’s personal brand, she also ties in another passion: her cats. They even inspired a recent Medium post she wrote about what cats have taught her about building a business. Including this quirky passion in her personal brand has helped Cangie honor something that’s truly important to her heart and has allowed her to spark meaningful connections with others.
“Having multiple things you’re passionate about, whether or not it has to do with your job, helps build credibility as you try new things. It shows you’re a whole person, and can help integrate what you love into your life, even if you’re just starting to find your passions,” she shares.
Embrace the unusual side of yourself. If you have a passion for collecting sneakers, creating collages, birdwatching, or anything else that grounds and connects you, but feels random—harness your enthusiasm and tell others about it.
Face Your Fears
Once you figure out your passion, pursuing it takes guts. If you decide to change careers, you may have to leave the security of a high-paying job. If you decide to dedicate your nights and weekends to writing a book, learning a foreign language, or designing costumes for a community play, there’s always the risk of failure. How can you overcome this fear?
“No one bats a thousand, no one is perfect, and everyone has setbacks. And when you find yourself in the midst of a failure moment, it’s painful—but know that it is normal,” Cangie advises.
If things aren’t going to according to your plan, give yourself a little space to process the situation. Then, when you’re ready, journal about the lessons learned from the experience and develop a new plan that prioritizes moving forward with grace.
“Think about how this will fit into the larger story of your life. Six months from now, how will you look back and see the crucial thing you just learned that helped you move forward? The failure then turns from a crappy thing into a necessary thing that gets you where you’re going next.”
The most important thing is to pick yourself up and keep trying.
“You have to persist anyway. It’s not that the people who are successful haven’t failed—they’re successful because they persisted in spite of their failures and consistently showed up until it paid off,” says Cangie.
Take the plunge.
So, you’ve found your passion and have an idea of how it fits into your life. How do you move to the next stage, and actually take the plunge?
“Look at the situation right now and think about where you can start living your passion. You might not be able to make major changes right away, and that’s OK. Start every day by looking for opportunities in front of you to put these things into play,” says Cangie.
For example, let’s say you love writing and you’re passionate about making it part of your job, but your current position doesn’t require much writing. Don’t sit around waiting for a writing assignment. Instead, get creative and look for ways you can start doing it right now.
“Maybe you can do a side project with the marketing team to write emails, or write a guest blog about your role, or maybe ask a friend at another company if they need a volunteer writer,” Cangie says.
Taking immediate steps toward your passion, even if they’re just small projects at first, makes the pursuit more achievable, and will allow you to pick up key skills along the way.
“Looking at your life as it is right now takes you out of this overwhelming idea that you have to make all these major changes to pursue a passion. It’s OK … not being sure where everything leads to next … that’s liberating. Just start where you are, and create more joy and purpose there,” she says.
Let it light up your daily life.
Living a passionate life requires effort that goes beyond the Monday to Friday hustle. Living your passion means identifying with your mission without reservation and finding ways to do it and live it every day—a feat that demands more energy and stamina than you might expect. It means pushing through when you’re tired, or when you’ve recently failed, or even when you think you can’t achieve anything more.
“When I am having a bad day, I ask myself: ‘Do I still want this?’ As long as the answer is yes, I know I can keep going,” says Cangie.
Just as you should reflect on moments of failure, you should also celebrate your successes. Being realistic about the negative and especially the positive will motivate you to keep living your passion, says Cangie.
“If you’re in the thick of it, you can forget how far you’ve come. When this happens to me, I pause and ask myself, ‘What do I have more of in my life right now that I wanted back then?’. The reminders of my progress help keep me going.”
It’s not going to be easy, says Cangie, but it will be worth it. Nothing nourishes you in quite the same way as finding and living your passion—so don’t hesitate to let it define, inform, and inspire you.