Category: Motherhood

Larissa Waters wears a lot of hats.

She’s a trained lawyer. She’s an Australian senator representing Queensland. She’s a card-carrying member of the Australian Greens party. And just as important, she’s a mom.

Waters gave birth to her second daughter, Alia Joy, in 2017. Fortunately, the Australian parliament allows moms to bring their infants to work, so Waters was able to return to her parliamentary duties with 10-week-old Alia in tow.

In fact, in 2016 the Senate decided to legally allow women to breastfeed in Parliament. But it didn’t happen until this year, when Waters became the first woman ever to breastfeed her baby in the Senate chamber.

That was noteworthy enough. But Waters further normalized this thoroughly natural process in June 2017. She had a motion to move. And her baby was hungry.

That’s all it took for Waters to become the first woman to breastfeed her baby while giving a speech in the Australian Parliament.

Waters wasn’t trying to make any statement. She didn’t mean to take on the role of an activist, at least not in this case. She told Buzzfeed News that she chose to give the speech while breastfeeding because “black lung disease is back among coal miners in Queensland and Alia was hungry.”

Waters made a brief speech calling for action on the subject of black lung disease, an illness caused by long-term exposure to coal dust. Black lung was virtually eradicated from Australia in the 1960s, but a boom in coal mining in that nation has brought it back. Waters felt that her speech in favor of addressing the re-emergence of black lung was deeply important.

Of course, so is feeding a hungry baby.

Waters’ feeding of her baby was received in the chamber with smiles and nods of approval.

That’s a good sign for a legislative body that in 2015 ordered Liberal MP Kelly O’Dwyer to “express more milk to ensure she did not miss votes in Parliament,”

the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.

Of course, there’s a big difference between making the rules and enforcing them. Just by being a mom, Waters is testing Parliament’s resolve to make the chamber more family friendly. So far, it seems to be working.

So just how long do we have to wait for common-sense family rules in other democracies? Waters may be more than a senator and a mom. 

She might be the tip of the spear, signaling a change to a more family-friendly approach to governing all over the world. Here’s hoping.

Last week, a source told People that Kim Kardashian would use a surrogate for her third baby.
Kardashian and her husband, Kanye West, currently have a son named Saint West and a daughter named North West. Those two were delivered traditionally, and by all accounts, the pregnancies weren’t easy.

Kim suffered from preeclampsia, a condition that affects 5 percent of women. This caused severe pain during both pregnancy and childbirth, and for the health of the babies, Kim was forced to deliver early.
“My mom was crying; she had never seen anything like this before,” Kim wrote on her blog.
“My delivery was fairly easy, but then going through that—it was the most painful experience of my life! They gave me a second epidural but we were racing against time, so I just had to deal.

“They say that this is what some women died from as a result of childbirth back in the day, without proper care. I’m so thankful that my doctor was able to catch this and address the issue immediately.”

Doctors told the reality star that she might need a hysterectomy after her second pregnancy.

Fortunately, that wasn’t the case, but the severe health effects led Kardashian to make a difficult decision.

But when the news of a possible surrogacy hit the internet, the reaction wasn’t entirely positive. Twitter users criticized Kardashian for her decision—which was, by the way, her decision.

In many ways, Kardashian’s current saga shows the stigma that still surrounds surrogacy.

Surrogacy isn’t new; in fact, the Bible references a surrogate in the book of Genesis. However, gestational surrogacy, in which a couple’s embryo is implanted into a surrogate with no genetic relation, has only been possible since 1985.

Controversy has always surrounded the technology, especially in cases where a mother is technically capable of bearing a child. Surrogacy can create some ethical dilemmas, and critics often focus on these issues.
For instance, couples must carefully determine whether the surrogate will have any rights to see the child, and whether the child will know the identity of the gestational mother.
Those are important questions, but they’re considerations for the individuals involved—just as surrogacy is a personal medical decision.
From 2004 to 2008, approximately 5,000 children were born through surrogacy, and while exact statistics are difficult to find, rates appear to be rising. One big reason: Surrogacy allows women to add to their families without undergoing high-risk pregnancies.
For people like Kim K, a surrogate isn’t simply an option; it’s the only way to safely build a family.

“My advice to anyone going through this or anything difficult during pregnancy is that all you can do is be hopeful, get the best information out there and just be prepared,” Kim wrote on her blog. “The more information you have, the better you know how to handle it!”
That’s great advice. Let’s hope the internet listens.

Every parent thinks that their child is gifted.
In a sense, they’re all correct—after all, kids are amazing.

But if you’re wondering whether your child is naturally brilliant, science could help answer that question. Here are a few curious (and scientifically plausible) ways to determine whether you’re raising a little Einstein.

1. They’re your firstborn.

A study published in the Journal of Human Resources makes the case that firstborn children typically perform better than their siblings at an early age. As a result, firstborn children might be more successful later in life.

Some research has “found that parents changed their behaviour as subsequent children were born. They offered less mental stimulation to younger siblings [and] also took part in fewer activities such as such as reading with the child, crafts and playing musical instruments.”

2. Their mom is smart.

Moms, pat yourselves on the back; genes related to cognitive capabilities appear to be carried on the X chromosome, according to a study from the University of Ulm in Germany.

A separate study from the Medical Research Council also found that the mother’s IQ was an excellent predictor of her offspring’s IQs. On average, children had only about a 15-point difference from their moms.

3. The baby was born in the country.

More importantly, the mother spent most of her pregnancy away from urban pollutants.
“A mother’s exposure to urban air pollutants known as polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs) can adversely affect a child’s intelligence quotient or IQ,” writes the National Institutes of Health.

“The study…found that children exposed to high levels of PAHs in New York City had full scale and verbal IQ scores that were 4.31 and 4.67 points lower than those of less exposed children.”
The researchers noted that the decrease in full-scale IQ was similar to what scientists would expect to see with low-level lead exposure. More research needs to be completed to verify the findings, but if you’re pregnant, it’s probably not a bad idea to get some fresh (unpolluted) air every once in a while.

4. They have big heads.

Yes, we’re serious. According to research from a British health resource group called UK Biobank, babies with larger-than-average heads are more likely to graduate with degrees.
Those big-headed tykes also scored higher on verbal–numerical reasoning tests.

“These results demonstrate substantial shared genetic aetiology (set of causes) between brain size, cognitive ability and educational attainment,” wrote the researchers in a study published in Molecular Psychiatry.

Remember, while a child’s makeup is important, functional intelligence isn’t all about hitting the genetic lottery.

Only about 40 to 60 percent of intelligence is hereditary, and your parenting will make a big difference in your kid’s academic performance. Experts recommend focusing on the process of learning, rather than praising kids for their natural ability.
For more on that concept, check out this excellent piece by Carol S. Dweck for Scientific American.

My dad wanted to name me Gretta. Greta? In fact, it may have been Gretl—he mentioned that he’d wanted to name me after the littlest girl among the von Trapp children in The Sound of Music—but he must have misremembered her name, and so I grew up believing that I was supposed to be Gretta.

I’m only assuming the name would have had a double t. It seems likely, given that my dad was responsible for my sister’s name, Christeena, a spelling wholly unique that was intended to make the “Christ” pop. (I was raised in the Bible Belt.) Plus, it just feels more balanced visually, which is something that I, an Anna, appreciate.

Anna is the name my mother won out with since my dad got to choose my sister’s name. She selected it—surprise!—for its biblical origins. Anna means “favor” or “grace.”

The figure I was named after apparently has the shortest bio in the Bible. Bible Gateway calls her the “most renowned of Bible widows,” which isn’t very inspiring. She was, however, the first Christian missionary (which feels kind of significant, since I thought I wanted to be a missionary), and she has her own Wikipedia page, formidably titled Anna the Prophetess.

Her only explicit Bible appearance is in the Gospel of Luke, where it is mentioned that she was “very old,” lived with her husband for seven (my favorite number) years before becoming a widow, and then remained single for the rest of her life (probably prophetic).

See how much meaning can be wrung out of a name? We are wired to scour our lives for significance, and one of the most basic ways we do this is through naming the new humans we create. Read on for five interesting baby-naming traditions from around the world.

India

In India, there are a number of different systems that may be used for naming children. According to Anu, a regional contributor from Mumbai, India, writing for Pocket Cultures, one common system uses the family name.

She writes:

“This means that the first male child is named after the paternal grandfather, the second male child after the maternal grandfather, and so on, with the girls being named after their paternal and maternal grandmothers. Imagine the confusion this causes—with many children having the same name! In addition to this, in southern India a father’s name is used as a surname—what ensues is total chaos!”

Baby naming may also carry spiritual significance, with names being based on astrology or Hindu gods and goddesses.

“In the northern parts of the country, every star is associated with a letter of the alphabet, and a kid’s name begins with the [letter] of the constellation he/she is born under,” Anu writes. “In the south, the kid is named after the constellation itself (or a variation of the name). This is how I got my name—from the star named ‘Anuradha’ (in the constellation Scorpio).”

As for naming children after Hindu deities, this does nothing to narrow the choices. There are literally millions of them.

Costa Rica

In the past, it was common for children in Costa Rica to receive three or four names, often the name of a saint that corresponded to the day they were born. Nowadays, according to Costa Rican Pocket Cultures contributor Nuria, the number of names has been bumped down.

She writes: “When I was born, I got two names, as did my sisters. The three of us received Spanish names, but other children got English names such as Karol, Alexander, Katherine and Johnny. It is very interesting to notice how, through time, the middle names have disappeared. It is now very common to give children only one name.

“My niece is called Tamara and my nephew, Felipe. Middle names are not that common anymore. In fact, children nowadays would be really surprised if they were told that their grandparents used to have three or more names!”

Turkey

Though this is a traditional practice that is no longer as widespread, some sections of Turkish society still give baby names with religious ceremonies.

According to the Turkish Cultural Foundation: “The name, which has been selected beforehand, is given at a meeting held for the purpose. A clergyman or a respected devout individual gives the call to prayer and whispers the name of the baby into its ear three times. If no imam is present, the name is given by the father or grandfather of the child in the same way.”

One Turkey-based writer notes that the traditional practice of naming children after their grandparents—usually names from Arabic origins—has largely been replaced with the custom of giving more modern and original names.

Indonesia

According to Carrie, a writer from Bali, Indonesia, the naming system in Indonesia is pretty straightforward, with only birth order being the determinant of the name given.

She breaks it down like this:

“Wayan/Putu/Gede/Nengah: first born (most common are Wayan and Putu; I haven’t met a lot of people named Gede or Nengah)

“Made/Kadek: second born baby

“Nyoman/Komang: third born baby

“Ketut: fourth born baby.”

“All of the names above can be for either boys or girls. Balinese also often use only one name (i.e., no last name/family name) which means that in documents like a passport, it may only list one name! What this means essentially is that there are a lot of people named Wayan/Putu/Made/Kadek!”

If this sounds like it may get confusing, that’s because it can. In 2001, when the president of Indonesia was about to be removed from office, Slate devoted an explainer piece to the country’s naming traditions, titled “What’s With Indonesian Names?”

Nigeria

Juliet Lapidos, writing for Slate, explores the significance of Nigerian names. Many have likely wondered whether all of them are as loaded as those belonging to some of the country’s higher-profile figures, like former Nigerian president Goodluck Jonathan, his wife Patience Jonathan, and former governor of Edo state Lucky Igbinedion.

The traditions vary greatly by ethnic group. Lapidos writes:

“Goodluck Jonathan is a Christian Ijaw from the southern part of the country. Many Ijaw have names passed down from the colonial era, often biblical ones like Jonathan (which probably started out as a first name for one of his ancestors). Some families prefer anglicized names, others don’t—but either way, names often express the parents’ expectations for the child or the circumstances surrounding its birth.”

The naming traditions of the Yoruba, in the southwest, are similar. According to Rosemary, a Nigerian contributor to Pocket Cultures, Yoruban names often relate to the circumstances in which the children entered the world.

For example, she writes, “Abiodun (boys) or Odunayo (unisex) acknowledges the closeness a child’s birth to celebrations like Easter, Christmas, or the New Year, while Abosede refers to girls born on Sunday.”

For another group in southern Nigeria, the Igbo, names can carry a more deterministic weight. “Traditional names may communicate concern for the kid’s future, like Dumaka, which means ‘Help me with hands.’ (As in, ‘I’m going to need some assistance here!’)” writ
es Lapidos. “Or faint annoyance, like Obiageli meaning ‘one who has come to eat.'”

As parents, we love our children, and we want them to do well.

The paradox is that sometimes these positive impulses end up weighing our kids down as they try to strike out on their own. Parents just can’t win.

So how can we tell when our natural desire to protect our children will deprive them of important lessons in resilience that will translate into valuable skills in the working world? How do we know when encouragement crosses the line into coddling?

To get closer to the crucial question of how to raise a child who is both balanced and self-reliant, compassionate and ambitious, we have to go back to the source of the problem.

Lots of researchers lay the blame for unemployable young adults on “helicopter parenting,” and they might just be onto something. Keyword: “might.” As in any act of parenting, we’re dealing with strong opinions, half-certainties, and a good deal of developing science.

Again, we just can’t win.

The term “helicopter parenting” has been thrown around in a remarkable range of contexts since at least 1967, when child psychologist Haim Ginott published a book called Between Parent and Teenager.

This book featured quotes from teenagers themselves, who said that their overprotective parents seemed to hover over them like a helicopter. Hence, “helicopter parenting.”

This term has taken on new relevance in the internet age, when new parents have access to article after article insisting that they’re making life so easy for their children that the kids are doomed to a rude awakening when they encounter the harsh realities of the working world. We read these stories and we worry.

The horror is that we may be right to worry.

Or we may not. Hey, no one said it was going to be easy.

Psychologist Anne Dunnewold, who prefers the term “overparenting,” told Parents that the label describes parents who are “involved in a child’s life in a way that is overcontrolling, overprotecting, and overperfecting, in a way that is in excess of responsible parenting.”

A seminal 2013 study in the Journal of Child and Family Studies found that college students with “over-controlling” parents were more depressed and less satisfied. The study concluded that helicopter parenting violated the “students’ basic psychological needs for autonomy and competence.”

So helicopter parenting is bad. We get that.

How do we avoid spinning the rotors over our own families?

Research psychologist Dan Kindlon suggests that we need to let our children suffer—within reason, we hasten to add. 

Note that we don’t have to contribute to that suffering—and that we must not. We just have to resist the temptation to step in every time our child encounters a difficulty.

In his book Too Much of a Good Thing: Raising Children of Character in an Indulgent Age, Kindlon emphasizes the importance of giving our kids the tools they need to reach true maturity.

“To be honest with themselves, to be empathetic, to take initiative, to delay gratification, to learn from failure and move on, to accept their flaws, and to face the consequences when they’ve done something wrong.”

As to how this is done, well, again: No one said it was going to be easy. That’s like the motto of all parenting ever.

Kids have a well-developed sense of self-esteem by the age of 5, which is much earlier than researchers originally suspected.

Because children begin to form ideas about their own self-worth as early as age 3, parents play a significant role in nurturing a child’s positive self-esteem and confidence.
Moms, you may not realize it as you shout for your kids to put on their shoes for what seems like the 10 billionth time, but they really are listening.

Parents are a child’s first role model, and the words you use when speaking to your kids will have a profound impact on the adults they become.
Help them build confidence that will last into adulthood and use these phrases when talking with your kids.

1. “I think I look great today.”

Many moms react negatively when they look in the mirror. If you have an unhealthy relationship with your body, you can’t help foster body confidence in your kids. While it isn’t a fix-all, the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA) offers a list of tips to help you regain confidence in your own body.

Up to 70 percent of teenage girls avoid activities because they don’t like the way their bodies look. Even if you never negatively comment on your child’s appearance, kids notice when you make negative comments about your own body.
When you only make positive statements about yourself, your kids will take note. Don’t complain about your (barely noticeable) muffin top or bemoan those extra 10 pounds to your daughter. Instead, comment on the things you love about your appearance, like the way your new jeans fit just right.

One great way to reinforce a healthy body image with your kids is to periodically help them write down all the things they like about themselves and post their list in a place they’ll see it often.

2. “You’re right, that did suck.”

As a mom, your first instinct when your kids fail is to praise them anyway in an attempt to comfort them. But kids are intuitive; they know when they’re being placated. Telling your kid, “Great job!” when they know they’ve done poorly only reinforces negative feelings.

If your kid missed the game-winning shot at his last basketball game, don’t be afraid to say, “Yeah, today wasn’t very good.” That might sound harsh, but one mom put it this way when she agreed with her daughter that she just wasn’t good at sports:
“I want my kids to have a right-sized understanding of themselves–their strengths and weaknesses—so they won’t be shocked and appalled when things get tough, or the world isn’t delivering just what they wanted the second they wanted it. They will understand that many things, most things, require a nearly inhumane amount of WORK. Lots and lots and lots of work…if my kid thinks she is the best in everything, wouldn’t she also think the world should be working for her?”

When we gently teach our kids that there are some things at which we excel and some areas where we just don’t, we set them up to have reasonable expectations for themselves in adulthood. You’re not limiting your child’s success; you’re preparing her to be confident in the face of adversity.

3. “This is how much money we make.”

Talk to your kids early about financial management. This will help them learn good money management skills in preparation for adulthood. As personal finance writer Ron Lieber noted in the New York Times, money is a mystery to most children. When they view money simply as an unlimited source of fun, they’re not learning the value behind currency.

Lieber sums it up this way:
“If we’re not open with them about finances, we’re setting them up for financial failure in adulthood. Shielding children from the realities of everyday financial life makes little sense anymore, given the responsibilities their generation will face, starting with the outsize college tuitions they will encounter while still in high school. …Or not knowing how and why to start saving right away for retirement, or how to pick a health insurance plan.”

This doesn’t mean that you need to dump your entire financial history on your kids when they’re in kindergarten. But by teaching them financial transparency and good money management when they’re young, you’ll set them up for financial success in adulthood.

4. “Can you help me with this?”

When you’ve got a thousand things on your to-do list, as most parents do, it may seem easier to do everything on your own. Although that may be the easiest thing to do, it’s not often the best thing for your kids.

According to psychologist Jeanne Williams, continually doing things for your kids without their help sends a message that you don’t have confidence in their abilities. If kids feel like their parents don’t believe they’re capable, guess what? They won’t think they’re capable either, which can set them up for hardship in adulthood.
Start by asking younger kids to help you with tasks or chores that directly relate to them so they have a sense of responsibility. Ask them to lay out their clothes or pack their snack for school. Make sure you give them ample time to complete the task so you can avoid the temptation to complete the task yourself.

For example, if you’re running a half-hour late to a morning meeting, this is probably not the best day to let your kid pick out their own clothes for the first time.
Older kids can assist with harder tasks, like helping you prepare a meal. They’ll feel proud that they helped you accomplish a goal. Asking your kids for help fosters confidence in their own abilities and a desire to help others as they grow older.

5. “Why don’t you decide?”

Letting your kid make their own choices helps build confidence in their decision-making skills. Although you don’t want to let your child make every decision on their own, you can start at an early age by allowing them to make their own choices a few times a day.

If your kid does make a mistake, don’t jump in and correct him right away. A study by Dr. Eveline Crone showed that kids under the age of 12 rarely respond to negative feedback. When your child makes a poor choice, instead of pointing out why their decision was wrong, focus on turning the mistake into a positive learning experience.

For example, your first-grader refuses to put on a raincoat before going to the park, even though you’ve explained it might rain. You let her choose not to wear her coat, and when it rains at the park, she gets soaked. Your child knows she made a mistake.
Instead of pointing this out to her, ask, “What would happen if you’d chosen to wear your rain jacket today?” This can help facilitate a conversation between you and your child about the power of making our own choices—a skill that will stay with them well into adulthood.

Not a lot of 2-year-olds are reading 19th-century British mystery novels, but this sweet little girl from Seattle happens to be a really big fan of the Wilkie Collins book The Woman in White.

In this book, the titular woman in white, Anne, is an unfortunate tragic hero—an eccentric who is committed to an asylum by her own conniving mother. Anne helps her half-sister marry the man of her dreams and inherit a large sum of money—and she dies in the process.
But this 2-year-old doesn’t need to know the whole story; she just calls the novel her “princess book.”
Technically, the girl’s mother—who asked that they remain anonymous—is the big fan of “old dead British writers,” according to BuzzFeed News. But her daughter likes to carry the book around everywhere, which she did on a trip to Seattle’s Ballard neighborhood late last winter.

The Princess of Ballard

Stunning bride Shandace Robertson was taking wedding photos with her new husband when she and the little girl made eye contact.

For the little girl, Mrs. Robertson was obviously a “princess” like the one on her book.
Scott Robertson, Shandace’s husband, told BuzzFeed, “My wife loves kids.” So he wasn’t surprised when she walked up to the little girl and gave her a rose from her bouquet. The girl showed Mrs. Robertson her book and pointed out the resemblance between the bride and the figure on the book cover.

Since this encounter took place during the time that the newlyweds were having their wedding photos taken, the new Mrs. Robertson asked the mother if she could take some pictures with the little girl.
The wedding photographer, Stephanie Cristalli, captured some truly amazing photographs of the interaction between the “Princess of Ballard” and her new friend.

May the Princess of Ballard reign on.

The wedding photographer shared the images with the young mother, and now the family has framed photos up on their walls of the little girl with Mrs. Robertson.

“She’ll walk up to it and be like, ‘There’s the Princess of Ballard!’” the mother told BuzzFeed. “And every time we go to Ballard, we expect to see the princess.”

Setting a High Bar

After reading this story, more than a hundred people commented, many mentioning that the tale had them in tears.
One reader, Katie Alexis, said: “If a little girl doesn’t come up to me on my wedding day thinking I am a princess I will be very disappointed. What a cute story. My eyes watered for sure.”
Ian Bruce wrote, “Anyone who goes out of her way to make the day of a 2-year old is a true princess in my book. Damn allergies…”
Maiko Dancer from Ithaca, New York, summed up the story nicely, too: “Not only is this just the sweetest story with the loveliest people, but the bride looks drop dead gorgeous in what is one of the most stunning wedding dresses I have ever seen. What a lovely way for a couple to begin their life together. And what a beautiful memory for the little girl and her mom.”

As for the bride and groom, Mr. Robertson described the encounter as “A really special moment…the cherry on top of the perfect day.”

We’ve known for some time that if a woman smokes while she’s pregnant it can have negative effects on her developing baby. From a higher risk of premature birth and low birth weight to increased risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has long warned that a mother’s smoking habit can have a serious impact on her unborn child’s life.

The reality of the dangers of smoking while pregnant is clearer than ever before. This is thanks to new 4-D ultrasound technology and research performed by Dr. Nadja Reissland and her colleagues in the Department of Psychology at Durham University.

Similar to other ultrasounds used during pregnancy, 4-D ultrasounds rely on sound waves to craft a picture of what a fetus looks like in the womb. What sets them apart, however, is that fact that 4-D ultrasound technology can actually create a video of the baby that can be watched in real time. This allows parents to see their baby move in the woman and even observe their responses to stimuli in their environment.

An unborn child’s response to their environment is exactly what researcher Reissland and her team were interested in when they began their observations for a study published by the journal Acta Paediatric.

Using 4-D ultrasound technology and precise observation software, researchers focused on watching exactly how an unborn baby responds when mothers continue their smoking habits during pregnancy.

The results of their research were nothing short of astonishing.

Four ultrasound scans were performed over the course of 12 weeks, starting at 24 weeks’ gestation. Study participants included 20 expectant mothers. Four of these mothers were regular smokers.

Although further research is needed to determine the exact implications of this study, results indicated that the babies of the smoking moms had significantly higher mouth movements and were touching their faces at much higher rates.

Researchers believed that these movements were negative responses to the mother smoking during pregnancy, and this information provides further evidence that continuing a smoking habit is harmful to developing fetuses.

Outside of providing us with important information about how babies develop in the womb and how expectant mothers can make lifestyle decisions that are in the best interest of their unborn baby, 4-D ultrasounds also confirm one more important truth: Pregnancy and fetal development are truly amazing. In fact, thanks to advancing medical technology, here are seven things we now know babies do in utero.

1. Your baby is learning to recognize your voice.

While your baby is growing inside your womb, they are learning important skills for survival on the outside. One study published in the journal Infant Behavior & Development found clear evidence that during the third trimester, babies are learning to prefer their mother’s voice over that of female strangers.

2. Your baby is getting the hiccups.

Have you ever noticed that your baby’s kicks feel suspiciously rhythmic and predictable? Chances are high that you’re not experiencing kicks, but what you’re actually feeling is that your baby has a case of the hiccups.

Most babies start to hiccup in the womb early on, but you may not notice these jerky movements until closer to six months, according to Healthline.

3. Your baby can taste what you eat.

We may not be certain about what causes intense cravings during pregnancy, but we do know for sure that when Mom is chowing down on tacos, Baby is getting a taste, too. Research shows that the nutrients from the food that pregnant women eat find their way into their amniotic fluid.

Amazingly, as early as 20 weeks’ gestation, babies begin to take big drinks of amniotic fluid and develop a taste for certain foods. What you eat during pregnancy may even influence what they prefer or dislike once they begin to eat solid food outside of the womb, according to a study published in the journal Pediatrics.

4. Your baby is smiling.

There is something life changing about the first time your baby flashes a grin. Thanks to 4-D ultrasounds, we know that babies start practicing their smile long before they’re born.

According to research published in The Journal of Maternal-Fetal & Neonatal Medicine, as fetuses’ brains develop they start learning to use their face. In addition to smiling, your baby is also practicing yawning, sticking their tongue out, and blinking while they wait to be born—when they can start making cute faces for their parents.

5. Your baby is learning to anticipate touch.

Newborns have an impressive ability to anticipate touch instead of merely reacting to it once they’ve experienced it. As it turns out, this is a skill that is learned in the womb.

Research in the journal of Developmental Psychobiology found that fetuses begin to open their mouth as an anticipatory response to touch right around nine months’ gestation. Additionally, repeated ultrasounds throughout the remainder of the pregnancy showed that babies become more skilled at anticipating touch the closer they are to being born.

6. Your baby is reacting to light.

Right around week 28 of your pregnancy, your baby’s eyes will open. They may not have a lot to look at in their first home, but they learn to react to light quickly.

By the 33rd week of your pregnancy, your baby’s pupils are dilating and constricting, fully able to detect when light enters the eye.

7. Your baby is learning language.

The developing brain is nothing short of amazing. In the third trimester, babies not only learn to prefer their mother’s voice, they also show preference for their native language.

Researchers studied fetal sensitivity to maternal speech and language by monitoring changes in the babies’ heart rate. The study determined that fetuses in the third trimester of pregnancy responded uniquely to their mother’s native language versus a foreign language being spoken.