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Motherhood

5 Things Medieval Moms Did Differently (And How They're Not So Different After All)

For anyone who has ever plopped their rambunctious child in front of a Disney movie or used their smartphone to quell a mini-revolt at a restaurant, it’s inconceivable to consider what being a mom was like just a generation or two ago. Parenting without handheld smartphone games or a plethora of mommy blogs to lean on? Yikes.
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If you think being a mom in the age of rotary phones and frozen TV dinners might have been difficult, imagine raising your children roughly a millennium ago in the Middle Ages. Medieval moms had a vastly different world to bring children into and, as a result, employed a variety of distinctive [linkbuilder id=”6694″ text=”parenting practices”]. Here, we’ll give you the most shocking examples.
And while there are certainly plenty of contrasts with how we raise our kids today, you might be surprised to see just how many of the basic tenets of motherhood have remained.

Before that, though, let’s make some things clear.

Many of the traditions of this era were, perhaps unsurprisingly, dictated by precisely when and where a mother lived…and also what class they were.
Lezlie S. Knox, an associate professor of history and director of the medieval studies program at Marquette University, likes to advise against painting the people of this time period with too broad of a brush. She explains that “The ‘Middle Ages,’ broadly speaking, refers to the period from the 2nd century up through the 17th—i.e. at least a millennium—encompassing a geographical area that stretched at least from Scotland to Syria.” As a result, Knox says, “generalizations are problematic.” In short, not all mothers followed the exact same traditions.

1. Some moms would have other women breastfeed for them.

One tradition that was not uncommon for some moms in this era was to employ “wet nurses”—women who would breastfeed other people’s children.

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Mothers of different backgrounds would have a wet nurse for different reasons. Jonathan R. Lyon, an associate professor of history at the University of Chicago, explains why wet nurses were part of life for many upper class mothers: the likelihood of disease and death in this era necessitated that a noble family produced many offspring so that some could survive into adulthood and become an heir.
“For royal families and for noble families … it was essential to have heirs, preferably quite a few,” says Lyon. “Extended time nursing babies of course made it harder for women to conceive again, so giving babies to wet nurses was a way to make queens and noblewomen ready to have more children more quickly.”
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The fertility advantages of having a wet nurse are echoed by Knox—“Breastfeeding sometimes appears to have had a contraceptive effect which meant lower status women might give birth to fewer children than higher status ones.” That said, Knox is quick to point out, breastfeeding was not a definitive obstacle to having multiple children: “We also have evidence of lower status families with quite a few children, suggesting a limited effect.”
Mothers of lesser means would occasionally use wet nurses for a different reason: they had to go back to work after having a child. Lyon elaborates on the economics of the time: “Women needed to work in the Middle Ages. On a peasant farm or in a family-run business in a medieval town, wives and older children worked.” The survival of the family rested on the shoulders of every single able-bodied family member.
Lyon stresses that the ‘stay-at-home-mom’ is a somewhat modern concept. As a result of this reality, families in the middle or lower classes “frequently paid for a wet nurse or asked a relative to be a wet nurse to multiple children” so that “mothers could get back to work more quickly.”
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For mothers of means, discernment reigned when choosing a wet nurse, in a way perhaps not too dissimilar from today’s parents finding a surrogate. Knox shares that “choosing a wet nurse was a critical choice.” The beliefs of the day, states Knox, “conveyed the idea that various characteristics were transferred to the child through breast milk—you wanted someone of upright character.” Pick a good wet nurse, get a good kid.
While folks today might not expect intelligence and values to be transferred through breast milk, nearly all parents still give strong consideration to anyone who spends a significant amount of time with their children.

2. Medieval moms had to grapple with a very high mortality rate.

While tragic circumstances still affect families today, those in the medieval era were often faced with a constant stream of pestilence, infection, and loss. The act of childbirth was an especially dangerous undertaking in those days. This was a stark fact of life for mothers across all social and political classes.
[pullquote align=”center”]“The majority of parents in the Middle Ages would have buried at least one child, and quite possibly several during their lifetimes.”
—Jonathan R. Lyon[/pullquote]
“The odds of mother and child both surviving childbirth were not very good,” declares Lyon, “After that, there were so many more deadly childhood diseases than today, without any modern medicine of course, that the odds of children surviving to the age of 5 or so were also very low.”
The high mortality rate was a very difficult set of circumstances for mothers and communities to deal with, especially when involving children.

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The constant specter of loss did not mean families lived in a constant state of sorrow, but it did necessitate different approaches to building a family, such as having multiple children knowing that some just may not live past a certain age. Lyon relays how losing a child was just a part of life for any medieval mother: “The majority of parents in the Middle Ages would have buried at least one child, and quite possibly several, during their lifetimes.”

3. Childbirth could involve the use of smells, sneezing, and a variety of other practices.

With such danger associated with the necessary act of procreation, it is no wonder that parents and midwives in the Middle Ages would try to use all known and passed down knowledge to have a healthy and successful birth.
One of the most remarkable documents to emerge from this period in time is a medical text from the 12th century known as the Trotula, an extensive collection of knowledge about women’s health in that era.
There were many directives for ensuring a successful birth in the Trotula. One instruction was to induce sneezing, which was thought to help direct energy to pushing out the infant. The Trotula (translated from Latin) states: “When the time of birth arrives, let the woman prepare herself as is customary, and likewise the midwife should do the same with great care.” Logical enough.

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“And let sneezing be induced with the nose and mouth constricted, so that the greatest part of her strength and spirit tends toward the womb,” it continued. Indeed, the inducement of sneezing during labor is mentioned multiple times in the paragraphs of the Trotula.
Another item of interest is the belief that the womb reacted differently to different kinds of smells. Specifically, that that the womb would push toward sweet smells and away from unpleasant one. The Trotula text declares: “the womb follows sweet-smelling substances and flees foul-smelling ones. For this, odoriferous spices are good, such as musk, ambergris, aloewood, and similar things, and also odoriferous herbs, such as mint, fennel, oregano, and similar things.” This certainly led to some mothers in labor having to endure a smorgasbord of unpleasant orders being waved in their face while trying to push. Though, perhaps that was also motivating?
Additionally, women might have worn or clutched trinkets or religious artifacts while giving birth. Knox says there are medieval sources that “indicate that women might have an amulet or similar with them as comfort against the very real pains of childbirth.”
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Rather than seeing these as nothing but bizarre superstitions, Knox contends that modern mothers can be just as quick to lean on items or practices that put them at ease: “There are plenty of practices women today use that could be characterized similarly—take the fetishization of a birthing plan, candles, music, or even the concept and marketing of a ‘push prize’”… So, while some may find it odd that the Trotula advocates hanging a piece of coral around the neck of an expectant mother, you have to admit it’s not much stranger than demanding that your husband blast some Enya to calm you down during your sixth hour in labor.

4. Honey was used as a way to encourage speech in children.

In addition to advice on giving birth, the Trotula provides a number of directives for new mothers regarding how to care for a newborn baby.
One specific tip for mothers is keep their baby’s nose clean and to use honey as a way to make sure the child will be able to speak later in life. Reads the document: “And so that it might talk all the more quickly, anoint the palate with honey and the nose with warm water, and let it always be cleaned with unctions, and let the mucous secretions always be wiped off and cleaned.” While the use of honey to encourage speech may have fallen out of style (honey poses a botulism risk and, according to the Mayo Clinic, should not be fed to any child under a year old), mothers still have to wipe clean “mucous secretions” today and, in all likelihood, will be doing so for the next thousand years.

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Though the anointment with honey was done as soon as a child was born, the honey emerges again when the child has grown more and is close to speaking age—“After the hour of speech has approached, let the child’s nurse anoint its tongue frequently with honey and butter, and this ought to be done especially when speech is delayed.”
They didn’t just count on honey to get kids to speak though. Parents then, as now, were encouraged to speak often in front of their children so that they could learn to talk sooner.
HealthyWayStates the Trotula: “One ought to talk in the child’s presence frequently and easy words ought to be said.” In this way, the Trotula was in lock-step with modern parenting, which strongly advises parents to speak frequently in the presence of their children.

5. Kids were put to work much earlier.

In the Middle Ages, young children were faced with the harsh realities of work or intense schooling and apprenticeship, drawing a stark contrast to today, where some argue that childhood can last right up until someone’s mid-twenties.

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Children were loved by their families, but were also expected to start pulling their weight as soon as they were able. Explains Lyon: “From the age of 7 … kids were definitely seen as able to contribute to the family. This is utilitarian in the sense … that every able-bodied person was needed in a peasant family or the family of an urban craftsman.” Children in the Middle Ages, says Lyon, were put to work around the same age that most children today would only be in second or third grade.
Lyon explains that despite the hard work expected of children, “That doesn’t mean … that parents only saw their children as little workers. We know from some of our sources that parents genuinely loved their children and had strong emotional attachments to them.”
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Overall, despite the need for children to work, or the sad regularity of illness and loss, or the sometimes harsh discipline tactics employed, parents still loved and cherished their children as much as parents of today, despite some texts or scholars that may suggest otherwise.
Knox points to historical evidence that gives vast insight into the loving bond between mothers and their children: “We have surviving objects or manuscripts paintings of toys, cribs, walkers, etcetera, that reflect how medieval parents cared for and engaged [with] their children in ways we do.”
Toys from this time period were, at their core, very similar to toys of today, often shaped to look like people or animals. Such items help bridge the gap between today’s smartphone-carrying moms and the less technologically-aided mothers of the Medieval Age.
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Medieval & Renaissance Material Culture

It’s all a reminder that though sneezing isn’t an integral part of giving birth and honey isn’t a prescription for speaking sooner, the feelings of love and protection that parents had over their children a thousand years ago were as strong then as they are today.

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Motherhood

5 Things Parents Do That Could Have Serious Consequences (And What To Do Instead)

Every parent wants to do everything perfectly.
Unfortunately, that’s impossible—we all make mistakes. Raising children is a real balancing act, as holistic psychologist Ellie Cobb, PhD, will tell you.
“The key is balance,” she tells HealthyWay. “Providing children with [a] full free range of choice can send the signal that they are not being cared for and can create anxiety for them. Providing no choices can hinder a child’s individual development.”
The trick is to find the right combination of freedom and restriction for your family, she says.

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“Providing some choice and also some structure creates the most effective space for children to grow, develop, and learn,” Cobb says.
Note that she does not say it’s easy. As we said, every parent makes mistakes, and some of those mistakes are common enough that they deserve some attention. We reached out to experts in a variety of fields and asked them a simple question: What could parents do differently?
For starters…

1. Your kid’s backpack is dangerously overloaded.

Not only that, it might not be the right type of backpack, according to Scott Bautch, chiropractor and president of the American Chiropractic Association’s Council on Occupational Health. Bautch has consulted on backpack design projects, and while he believes that technology is helping to push parents in the right direction, they frequently force their kids to bear a heavy load.

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“For younger children, backpacks are designed to carry about 10 percent of their weight, up to 15 percent for kids over 12 years old,” Bautch says. “If the backpacks are carrying more weight, they would be designed differently to shift the weight [to kids’] hips.”
But Bautch says that the average fourth-grader carries an incredible 33 pounds—about a third of their body weight—which can lead to injuries and musculoskeletal disorders. To put that in perspective, it’s the equivalent of a 150-pound adult carrying around a 50-pound weight every day, and that’s a real issue. Per the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, as many as 7,300 kids per year end up in emergency rooms due to backpack-related injuries, reports CNN.
HealthyWayTo avoid injuries, parents should carefully monitor the weight of backpacks on a day-to-day basis. Just as importantly, parents should choose backpacks that are sized and designed appropriately with broad, padded straps and multiple compartments, which help kids intuitively load their backpacks correctly so that heavier loads are towards the bottom.
Finally, kids should learn to lift their backpacks onto a chair or table before lifting them onto their backs; this prevents a harsh twisting action, which can cause an injury.
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“We buy backpacks because they have Scooby Doo or Big Bird, but we really need to think, ‘how are these affecting my child?'” Bautch says.
The American Chiropractic Association offers more tips for avoiding backpack-related injuries here.

2. Attempting to ease your child’s fears might inadvertently reinforce them.

Let’s say that your child is afraid of strangers; as a parent, your immediate inclination might be to guide them through interactions with teachers, relatives, and children in a safe, controlled environment. That’s a good intention, but it can be somewhat misguided.

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“Things that they are doing to ease the child’s anxiety, fears, and phobias are often the very things that make those problems worse,” clinical psychologist Anna Prudovski, MA, C.Psych, tells HealthyWay. “Parents often try to protect the child, answering questions for a shy child, allowing a child who is afraid of the dark to sleep in parents’ bed [or] keeping the lights on at night. But this is exactly what [keeps] the fears and anxiety going.”
[pullquote align=”center”]”Avoidance reinforces the child’s fear by demonstrating that the stressor is something that cannot be talked about.”
—Ari E. Fox[/pullquote]
Prudovski recommends a different approach.
“As difficult as it is, gradually and consistently exposing the child to the things they fear is the only way to get rid of the fears (and to avoid therapy in the future).”
Psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker Ari E. Fox of Cope With School NYC agrees.
“The best way to overcome anxiety, fearful situations, [or] phobias is by recognizing the challenge, making a plan, and gently exposing the child to whatever makes her anxious in the most benign form possible,” Fox explains.
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“For example, if a child is afraid of travelling by subway, rather than taking only taxis or the bus, they can read about the subway, then visit a station, then take the train for a stop or two and continue to take longer trips gradually as the fear subsides,” Fox says. “Avoidance reinforces the child’s fear by demonstrating that the stressor is something that cannot be talked about.”

3. The “never wake a sleeping baby” adage can cause sleep issues.

“This results in fragmented sleep and can prompt nighttime awakenings,” says Dennis Rosen, MD, a pediatric pulmonologist and sleep specialist working at Boston’s Children Hospital. Rosen is assistant professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical School, and he authored the school’s guide for children’s sleep strategies.

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Rosen says that while parents shouldn’t disturb sleeping infants during their first few months, babies should start getting most of their sleep at night by the time they’re around 3-6 months old.
“Maintaining and enforcing a regular and balanced sleep schedule winds up making everybody’s lives easier, even if it means keeping that toddler from taking a three hour nap in the middle of the day,” Rosen wrote for Psychology Today.

4. Introducing kids to computers without setting firm rules can cause issues.

These days, kids need to know how to use computers in order to succeed, but too much screen time is definitely problematic. As tempting as it might be, parents shouldn’t let their computers, tablets, and smartphones play the role of babysitter.

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“By introducing screen time early on, they are potentially creating numerous problems and conflicts that they could have avoided otherwise,” Prudovski says.
Those problems include sleep issues, likely prompted by blue-spectrum light, which may suppress the production of the hormone melatonin. Per the Harvard School of Health, that might raise a person’s risk of obesity, diabetes, and other serious disorders. There’s even some limited evidence that bluelight could contribute to vision problems.
[pullquote align=”center”]”Parents can set expectations and boundaries to make sure their children’s media experience is a positive one. The key is mindful use of media within a family.”
—Megan Moreno, MD[/pullquote]
“We’ve seen a substantial increase in myopia [also known as nearsightedness] over the last 20 years, and that’s coincided with an increase in computer usage,” says ophthalmologist Gary Heiting, OD.
Of course, we’re just scratching the surface here; a 2001 review found that children who use computers early in life may have trouble distinguishing between the real world and the electronic world, and psychologist Aric Sigman, PhD, has repeatedly warned that excessive screen time is “linked with significant measurable biological changes in their bodies and brains that may have significant medical consequences.”
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The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends limiting screen time to one hour per day for children 2 to 5 years of age. For older kids, parents need to stay engaged to determine how much screen time is too much.
“Parents play an important role in helping children and teens navigate media, which can have both positive and negative effects,” said Megan Moreno, MD, author of the study, in a statement relayed on the AAP’s website. “Parents can set expectations and boundaries to make sure their children’s media experience is a positive one. The key is mindful use of media within a family.”

5. There is a right and a wrong way to praise your child.

As parents, our instinct is to heap praise on our kids so that they grow up with a healthy self-image. There’s just one problem with that impulse: Certain types of praise can actually damage self-esteem.

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That’s according to a 2014 study published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology. When you praise children for their personal qualities, the researchers found, they later felt greater shame following an experience of failure. Over time, that feeling of shame—the sense that they are themselves the failures—can add up to the poor self-esteem that every parent wants to save their children from.
That doesn’t mean you should stop praising your kids, of course. Quite the opposite. It’s just important to choose the right kind of praise. Those same researchers that demonstrated the negative effects of personal praise found that process praise, or compliments on specific behavior, rather than the self, does not lead to greater shame after failure.
In fact, it’s a pretty good bet that process praise is the way to build your kid’s self-confidence right from the start. So next time your kid brings home straight A’s, don’t say, “You’re the smartest kid in the world!” Instead, say, “I love how you studied so hard all year long to earn those grades!”
Of course, the style of your praise isn’t the only factor at play, here. There’s also the question of quantity. A more recent study published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science suggests that parents should strive for a happy medium—neither overpraising nor withholding praise from their children.
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These researchers asked parents and children if parental praise was commensurate with actual academic successes. When parents said that they over- or under-praised their kids for their schoolwork, those kids were more likely to do poorly in school. They were also more likely to have depression.
The takeaway, at least for now, is that parents who confer praise when and where children do something praise-worthy have the right idea. If hearing someone complain about how “everyone gets a trophy these days” makes your skin crawl, you’re not alone. But the science seems to suggest that they might have a point.

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Lifestyle

7 Habits That Make People Seem Less Intelligent

No one wants to attract attention for appearing stupid. It’s not something to strive for.
We’d all prefer to be the best and the brightest in our personal and professional lives. There’s a reason that one of our worst fears is public speaking: We’re terrified we’ll make a mistake that makes us look foolish in front of others. It’s embarrassing to look dumb. But you’d be surprised at how easy it is to do.
Try as we might, sometimes we engage in self-sabotaging behaviors that undermine our authority and make others scoff at our intellects.

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The worst part is that these are very common human traits we’re all prone to. The key to avoiding them, though, is self-awareness. With just a few simple tweaks to your social habits, you can make yourself look sharper and more competent in no time.
With that in mind, let’s look at the worst of these habits, why we have them, and how we can fix them so that those around us will see us for how bright we are.

Dressing Down in Professional Situations or Important Events

Who doesn’t want to be dressed comfortably at all times? In modern society, business casual is more accepted than ever, but don’t forget the “business” part. If you dress slovenly, or wear clothing that doesn’t fit the occasion (or is ill-fitting), you can expect to be looked at with disapproval.

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If you don’t have a lock on your sense of style, it can hurt you: A 2014 study from the Journal of Experimental Psychology put 128 men of diverse age and backgrounds through simulated business negotiations.
The big reveal? Those who wore suits were perceived as more professional and assertive. Those in casual attire were more unsure in their delivery and failed to attract similar respect from their peers.
HealthyWaySo before you walk out the door, do a double-take in the mirror. Simply ask yourself, is this really right for the event I’m attending? If the answer is no, or you find you don’t have the proper attire in your wardrobe, it’s time to go shopping.

Slouching

We’re all guilty of hunching over our screens, our books, or anything else that holds our attention. It’s gotten to the point that if someone sits up straight, it stands out as unusual. However, slouching may cause more than back pain. Check out the video below to see why you should sit up straight more often.

Excessive Nodding and Head Tilts

It may sound odd, but how you hold your head in a business meeting or casual conversation can radically alter how others view you.
Goman notes this can be an issue that especially undermines women’s confidence. One example is head tilting, which is fine in small doses, but when excessively denotes submissiveness.
https://giphy.com/gifs/dancingwiththestars-dancing-with-the-stars-abc-3o7TKRUu2dPOJ0jpo4
“It’s like my puppy [who] I used to take for walks,” she says. “… when he’d see a great big dog, he’d tilt his neck as if to say ‘Go ahead, bite me, [hurt] me. Because you’re bigger I know you could anyway.’ It’s a really subconscious view of vulnerability.”
Goman adds that excessive head nodding is also a no-no: “It’s a nonverbal cue that says ‘I’m listening,’ … but women tend to nod our heads like little bobblehead dolls. …It just looks like we’re agreeing with everything. Because men tend to nod only when they agree, but we nod to encourage someone to keep speaking. …So that makes us look like we’re agreeing with everything and don’t have an idea of our own.”


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Communications success strategist and body communication expert Sharon Sayler notes other things to avoid: repeatedly looking down makes others view us as shy, while continually looking up can make us appear aloof and arrogant. She offers a simple fix: “Always keep your chin parallel to the ground.”

Misusing Words and Phrases (and Verbal Pauses)

We all want to impress, so adding some fancy words to our lexicon will make people take notice. This can backfire horribly, however, if you don’t have a good grasp on the words you actually use. You wind up looking pretentious and foolish.

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And it’s not just misusing fancy words that can make us look stupid, but common words and phrases as well.
Harvard cognitive scientist and linguist Steven Pinker explored the most commonly fumbled words and phrases in his 2015 book The Sense of Style, and it’s an illuminating look at how easy it is to get tripped up over everyday language.
HealthyWayCommon blunders include confusing plural words for singulars (criterion vs. criteria, datum vs. data), or words easily mistaken for each other (disinterested vs. uninterested, fortuitous vs. fortunate).
And one of the prize offenders is literally the word “literally,” which is constantly being used mistakenly for “figuratively.” It’s been abused so much that Merriam-Webster and Cambridge dictionaries are now acknowledging its informal usage.

Another way words can backfire is the verbal pause. Sayler says the excessive injection of “uh,” “ah”, “you know,” and “basically” all undermine our authority, but it a common error: “I’ve been to corporations where the majority of people there use the word ‘basically,’ … they don’t realize that it’s not used in common everyday language in the business world, and it makes them look less than intelligent.”

Language Softeners and “Outsourcing Success”

Sayler also cautions against what she calls a “language softener,” i.e., self-deprecating comments like “well I’m not sure about this idea, but…”, may cause your contribution to be passed up for someone else’s more confident pitch.

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She also adds that these types of statements “minimize what you say next. …It makes you look less intelligent.”
To avoid this (and other self-sabotaging issues), she recommends taking several deep breaths, which help clear your mind, relax your face, and regain your focus.
Having said that, she warns to avoid excessive mouth breathing, which is also denoted as a sign of lower intelligence.
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Goman discussed another concept that can hinder success in the workplace (which tends to affect women more than men). She calls it “outsourcing success,” or the inability to accept a compliment. If one deflects praise for their work by replying along the lines of “anyone could have done it,” or “it was my team,” this tends to “make them look less confident, competent and less smart.” So when someone compliments you, the best thing you can do is say “thank you” and own that success.

Being Overly Judgmental

If you think ripping on someone you dislike will make you look better in the eyes of others, think again. In fact, it’s one of the most self-destructive habits to engage in if you’re trying to get ahead at your job.

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Gossiping makes you untrustworthy. A lack of compassion is often seen in tandem with a lack of intelligence. Lacking the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes generally means you’re oblivious to your own faults.
Not only that, but it makes people less likely to interact with you, as they realize they could also be in the firing line.
Another reason to avoid judgmentalism: Sometimes our negative assumptions are based on inaccurate information, and when you’re eventually confronted with the fact that your comments were off-base, you look twice as foolish. And don’t be surprised to find out that others are talking negatively about you, too.

Using Profanity At Work

Despite recent studies show that those that curse are the smartest, using profanity at work still isn’t a good look.

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This is the biggest no-brainer on the list. We realize the occasional on the job curse word is pretty inevitable. And it can defuse tension at the office and take the air out of the situation. But excessive cursing is still perceived by many as lacking in class.
In a 2012 Career Builder survey, 64 percent of employers said they had a negative view of employees who curse, and 57 percent said they’d be less likely to promote cursing workers to higher positions.
In other words, if you’re looking for a new job and drop the f-bomb during the interview, don’t count on getting a callback.
Keeping all these pointers in mind will make your daily interactions far more positive and beneficial in your life, both personally and professionally.
Just remember to be the best version of yourself you can be to help improve how intelligent you’re seen in the eyes of others (and yourself). And whenever you’re in doubt about how you look in public, always remember…ahhhhh…to breathe.

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Health x Body Wellbeing

Essential Oils 101: Aromatherapy And Beyond

Disclaimer: Just so you know, if you order an item through one of our posts, we may get a small share of the sale.

A few years ago, a friend who had been struggling with depression told me she was feeling “basically cured” and gave most of the credit to her newfound study and practice of aromatherapy. My interest was definitely piqued, as I’m constantly looking for green and natural ways to boost health and happiness. Still, even as an open-minded wellness nut who’s willing to try almost anything once (and someone who has used natural products containing essential oils for years), I saw her claims for what they were: an anecdote from a friend, not definitive proof of healing properties.
Of course the ancient Greeks, Romans, Chinese, and Egyptians all used oils in their healing practices. Even Hippocrates—the guy who pretty much invented Western medicine—was said to be an expert in the medicinal application of botanical oils. But then, of course, anyone who tells you that essential oils will completely fix your life just might be trying to sell you snake oil.
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So is there modern, objective evidence that using essential oils in natural remedies, aromatherapy, topical beauty applications, and green cleaning products can produce real, beneficial results? Yes there is.
It’s time to explore what you stand to gain by adding essential oils to your life. It’s important to consult your doctor about any serious medical issues you may have, rather than attempting to self-medicate exclusively with essential oils (or any other at-home therapy), but empirical evidence suggests that adding essential oils could be a major win for your wellness.

The Top 5 Essential Oils Beginners Need to Know

You may already have a few essential oils rolling around in your bag of tricks, or you might be a novice. Either way, learning how to incorporate these classic essential oils into your healthy living practice safely (more on the importance of dilution to come!) is easy even for beginners.

1. Lavender

You already know it smells amazing and that sleeping with a sachet of dried lavender under your pillow can bring you sweet dreams. Kac Young, PhD, a naturopathic doctor and author of The Healing Art of Essential Oils (which I recently read and loved), says in her book that if she could only use one essential oil, lavender would be her choice. She cites lavender’s extra long list of beneficial properties, which range from it being antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory to being a powerful relaxant, while still being “one of the most gentle.”

Multiple studies have found that lavender oil can help with an array of issues in addition to its well-known use for encouraging sleep. Research shows it facilitates wound-healing and can help calm dementia patients. I sometimes pour a few drops into my nighttime bath to help me unwind, then sleep like a baby. Zeyah Rogé, a massage and mental health therapist (as well as yoga instructor) who has long incorporated essential oils into her practices says lavender is one of her top favorites because of its helpfulness “for nervous system balancing,” as well as being good for the skin, “particularly in healing burns.”

Try This:

Itchy skin from a bug bite, bee sting, or even a chronic condition like eczema? Young advocates dabbing a bit of diluted lavender oil right onto the itchy spot, then waiting calmly for the soothing relief to roll over you.

2. Peppermint

In addition to affording us minty-fresh breath and the flavor of our favorite Christmas candies, peppermint has been proven useful for a slew of holistic uses. From relieving nausea and stomach pains (think of all those minty antacid tablets on the market) to improving focus and lowering fevers, the therapeutic uses are well documented. In fact, peppermint oil is one of the best medicines we have for treating irritable bowel syndrome. It’s important, however, if you’re using peppermint as a topical or orally ingested treatment that you stick to using it in diluted form, as it is possible to use too much.
Rogé uses this fresh-smelling oil for its antibacterial properties, and Young inhales the stuff directly, or in steam, to soothe respiratory issues during a cold or flu. Think Vicks VapoRub.

Try This:

Can’t stop snacking? Peppermint can act as a mild appetite suppressant. “Inhale peppermint essential oil to stave off the munchies,” says Young.

3. Lemon

It turns out that lemons are good for so much more than spritzing in a refreshing summer beverage or bringing a hint of acid to your dinner. According to Young’s book, it’s known to have “antiseptic … antimicrobial, antibacterial … and even antifungal” properties. The essential oil of lemons is the most concentrated way to harness their disinfectant power as a kitchen and bathroom cleaner, a natural skin-brightener, or even an at-home wart remedy. Perhaps the best use for lemon essential oil is its proven ability to boost happiness, alertness, and general clarity of mind when inhaled. So if you’re feeling down or dull, lean in and take a whiff!

Try This:

Sore throat? Add a drop of lemon oil and a bit of honey to your hot tea for a soothing and antibacterial home remedy.

4. Tea Tree

Known for its long list of uses related to clearing up troubled skin, this multitasking oil is one of my favorites (and both Young and Rogé agree). I’ve been using this stuff on mild acne flare-ups since I was a teenager, and I know it works for me.
“Tea tree oil is a known antiseptic and antifungal and is great for treating skin infections,” says Rogé, who opts to add a little tea tree oil to her lotions. Young writes that tea tree oil can be used as a treatment for nail fungus, thrush, and eczema, and a recent study shows that tea tree vapor can prevent the spread of influenza A virus and E. coli phage M13. And if you want to try something simple, you can even boil the leaves to make a healing beverage (thus the origin of its name).  

Try This:

Burned your hand while cooking? “Apply two to three drops of diluted tea tree essential oil to soothe minor burns (think first degree). It will also help prevent scars from forming,” says Young.

5. Eucalyptus

Besides having the evocative smell of the Northern California eucalyptus groves I used to play in as a kid, this pungent oil is known as something of a cure-all in the home remedy world.
You can use the oil from this Australia-native tree in mouthwash to freshen breath or as a salve to heal minor burns and wounds or relieve pain from bug bites or bee stings. Rogé even puts some in her home cleaning products because of its well-known germ-killing powers.

Try This:

After a long work week followed by a night of dancing in heels on Saturday, you might have developed some nasty blisters. Instead of popping them or toughing it out with Band-Aids, Young recommends putting “a drop or two of diluted eucalyptus essential oil on a blister to alleviate the swelling and to disinfect the area.” Then you can bandage as normal.

Dilution: an Essential Oil Must

Essential oils shouldn’t be used in their super-potent, concentrated forms. To avoid injury, they need to be diluted into gentler “carrier oils” like jojoba or sweet almond oil, or even just water or alcohol if you’re using a plug-in diffuser.
In her book on the subject, Young recommends “a 2 percent dilution (two drops of essential oil per teaspoon of carrier oil, or 10 to 12 drops [of essential oil] per ounce [of carrier])” which is thought to be “ideal for most adults in most situations.” However, children and elderly folks should use even gentler concoctions. In their cases, it’s best to start with the lowest dilution possible, which would be “a 0.25 percent dilution (one drop per four teaspoons of carrier oil).”
If in doubt about using oils on babies, kids, or even yourself, it’s always best to consult with a trained aromatherapist.

Aromatherapy: Do you need a boost?

Are there any particular smells that take you straight back to your childhood or a particularly happy time? For me, it’s the scent of jasmine flowers in the summer, and I even go as far as carrying a vial of jasmine oil to sniff throughout the day if I’m stressed.
As Rogé puts it, “Aromas leave a strong imprint on the brain and connect us to memories and emotions.” I visited her massage practice in Portland, Oregon, where she uses a series of essential oils mixed with the massage oils at different points during the treatment in addition to an aromatherapy diffuser. She explains, “During sessions it can be helpful to include aromas so that there is a smell associated with the positive healing experience. When the client is needing self-care outside of their session they can take a whiff of the aroma and get a ‘hit’ of the goodness of our previous session.”
Think of how a bad smell in your environment can totally disgust and overwhelm you―spoiled fish in your kitchen trash or a pet mess on the carpet, for example. It’s not such a stretch that the positive impact of pleasant scents might be just as powerful.

And when it comes to self-care and mental health, there are some specific oils that have science backing their benefits. But each person is different, and Rogé puts it like this: “My biggest advice for selecting essential oils for self-care is to do a test: simply smell an oil and see how it makes you feel. Notice how your energy shifts, how you breathe, what memories come up. If it is all pleasant then you have yourself a nice self-care essential oil. If you feel anxious, aggravated, or annoyed, well…it clearly isn’t the right one for you.”

Add Essential Oils to Your Self-Care Rituals

Hair

Do you struggle with annoying “snowflakes” falling onto your otherwise polished, black blazer shoulders at work? “Add two to three drops of peppermint essential oil to your regular shampoo and conditioner to stimulate the scalp and help remove dandruff,” Young writes in The Healing Art of Essential Oils. Similarly, Rogé says she loves adding rosemary oil to her homemade conditioner, saying “rosemary oil is great for hair care!”

Skin

Contrary to what you believed in your awkward teenage years, oil is not always bad for your skin. In fact, the oils you’ll use for dilution, like jojoba or argan, make great facial moisturizers because they contain vitamins and fatty acids that can safely hydrate even sensitive skin. Also, consider using diluted rosemary oil as an antiseptic and anti-inflammatory for acne and pimples.

Happiness

Studies show that sniffing essential oils containing limonene (a compound found in citrus oils such as lemon, orange, grapefruit, bergamot, and lemongrass oils) made participants felt increasingly “comfortable,” “soothed,” and “natural.”
Rogé even divulges that she gets a happiness boost by using a scent like diluted rose oil as perfume in order to “feel fancy.”

Relaxation

Can’t sleep? Rub a few drops of diluted lavender oil into your hands and inhale, then smooth any extra onto your pillowcase before bedtime. Young says this also works with wakeful kiddos who are six months and older.

Heal your home.

Years ago, I heard that ants hate the smell of mint, and I’ve been spritzing diluted peppermint and spearmint oils around my kitchen ever since. It turns out my belief wasn’t just an old wives’ tale. Young specifically recommends peppermint and citronella oils in places like your basement, attic, or outside sitting areas where you need a bit of help “keeping bugs at bay.”
For areas in your house that have a special purpose, like bedrooms or the linen closet, she recommends incorporating a few aromatics to set the right moods, such as “rose, ylang-ylang, neroli, patchouli, or clary sage” in the bedroom if you “want a night of passion.” And lavender-soaked cotton balls in closets and dressers “not only keep them fresh-smelling but also to repel bugs, moths, and spiders.”

Rogé says she puts lemongrass or eucalyptus (which both have antimicrobial properties) in her all-purpose cleaning supplies.

Stay safe, naturally.

Just because essential oils are 100 percent natural doesn’t mean they aren’t powerful substances that must be used with care. Doctors say it’s important to let them know what essential oils you’ve been using, since there may be potential for drug interactions. Also, if you are pregnant or have certain health conditions, it’s best to consult a professional before starting an essential oil practice.
Rashes or flare-ups are possible even on healthy skin if you’re sensitive to a particular oil, especially if you use them straight or with not enough dilution. As Rogé cautions, “While essential oils have cleared [my] skin problems, putting too much oil directly on my skin has created a rash. And so, my advice is to respect these oils and listen to your personal response to them to guide your use.”

Like a Boss: How to Make Your Own Oil Diffuser

My favorite way to practice aromatherapy is to use an electronic oil and water diffuser to fill a room with scent. I keep one of these in my living room, bedroom, and kid’s room, and (when I have the wherewithal) switch out the oils for different times of day: lavender or sage for a restful night or lemon for a morning pick-me-up. But if you’d prefer a cheaper or lower-tech way to get the benefits of aromatherapy, Young says it’s super easy to make a simple reed diffuser at home.
You’ll need a bottle or jar (the prettier the better, of course) and a handful of bamboo skewers, which you can find at a kitchen or craft store or with the barbecuing supplies at the supermarket. “Combine ¼ cup hot tap water, ¼ cup alcohol or vodka, and 30 drops of your favorite essential oil,” Young writes. Clip the tips off both sides of the skewers and pop them in the jar with the mixture, then simply wait for “the scent to permeate the room.” If you feel the scent is diminishing before the mixture runs out, “flip the sticks every other day to keep the smells active,” Young advises.
As long as you respect the power and strength of essential oils and use them carefully, they have a lot of positive potential and very few drawbacks.
When you’re ready to get started, there really isn’t one specific brand you need to buy. There are lots of reputable essential oil producers, but it is a good idea to check the label to make sure you’re getting the real thing and not a synthetic product. Young tells HealthyWay she “strongly suggests you purchase only organic or 100 percent pure essential oils.”
This article from Sustainable Baby Steps also has a good list of what to look for as you start incorporating essential oils into your day-to-day routines.

Essential Oils Products You’ll Love:

Categories
Health x Body Wellbeing

How To Fall Asleep Fast (And Stay That Way)

Yajun GiaOh Sunday night, how troublesome you can be. For almost 40 percent of Americans, the last night of the weekend is the one we spend tossing and turning, wondering how to fall asleep.
And when you take a close look at insomnia and other sleep disorder statistics from the American Sleep Association, things don’t exactly look better the rest of the week. Hundreds of thousands of us fall in bed every night and beg our brains to just shut up and let us sleep already.

What’s going on?

When it comes time to go to bed, most of us would love to fall asleep the minute our heads hit the pillow. The faster it happens, the faster we can head into dreamland, right?
The good news is we really can fall asleep fast, according to Steven Woltering, PhD, director and founder of the Neurobiological Lab for Learning and Development at Texas A&M University. Woltering and his colleagues have studied sleep onset latency (SOL), the amount of time that it takes the body to transition from being fully awake to sleeping soundly.
In a survey of 2,000 healthy, typically developing people, Woltering says the average time people self-reported falling asleep was less than 2 minutes. When Woltering’s graduate student Yajun Jia added more controls to measure the sleep conditions (aka not going by self reports), the number was higher but still below about 8 minutes. Women tended to have a longer SOL than men, even if they transitioned to sleep quickly.

Yet a third of us struggle to fall asleep at night, putting the number of Americans with insomnia—the diagnosis for trouble falling asleep and/or staying asleep—in the millions, and forcing 5 percent of women to turn to sleep medications to help them catch a break at bedtime. So what’s going on?
First, a bit of good news: Doctors don’t consider you to be a “problem sleeper” if you’re not falling asleep within 8 minutes. In fact, trouble falling asleep is not considered a “pathological problem” until it’s happening on a regular basis, according to David White, chief medical officer of Philips Sleep and Respiratory Care. You need to lie in bed for 30 minutes (or more) more than three times a week for a month for a doctor to make an insomnia diagnosis, White says.
An insomnia diagnosis can be short term or chronic, meaning some people will struggle with sleep for just a few weeks or as little as three months, whereas others can face bedtime battles for longer. The reasons this is happening—and the speed with which you can (or can’t) kick insomnia—are as individual as people themselves.
“The more we learn about what goes on in our brain when we fall asleep, the more we realize that sleep does not depend on a single mechanism,” Woltering tells HealthyWay. “There are a number of brain nuclei, biochemicals, and endocrine systems involved, and they all interact. What this tells us is that sleep has evolved as a very important function. I think having such a complex and widespread network is helpful in terms of having some safeguards: If something goes amiss with one system another can take over to compensate so we can still sleep.”
One of the biggest factors in whether we fall asleep quickly is a brain chemical called adenosine. Adenosine builds up when you’re awake, and the longer you’re awake, the more you tend to have.
“The more adenosine you have in your system, the more pressure you will feel to go to sleep! It’s like an internal clock,” Woltering says.
Unfortunately caffeine, certain medications, stress, and other factors can block our adenosine receptors, keeping us awake longer.
So, is it possible to fall asleep faster and actually stay that way? The experts say yes! Here’s how to alter your space, your body, and your mind to make it easier to fall asleep fast—and stay asleep.

  • Space


    If you get the minimum seven hours of sleep a night that adults are supposed to get, each year you’ll spend some 2,500 hours in bed (or wherever you zonk out). But if your bedroom isn’t primed for sleep, you’re probably going to spend a whole lot of that time trying to convince your brain to quiet down so you can catch some ZZZs.
    Lighting: The body depends on periods of light and dark to adjust our circadian rhythms, the internal clock that tells us when we should be asleep and when we should be awake. But too much light in your bedroom will throw that out of whack, White says. A bedroom should be as dark as possible, with the addition of room-darkening curtains and other means to block out distracting light that could trigger the brain to stay awake.
    One of the biggest offenders is blue light, aka the light that’s emitted by a smartphone or tablet screen, White says. “It’s innately alerting,” he warns. “It makes you wake up!”
    Clocks: Most of us depend on an alarm clock to wake us up in the morning, but if your clock has numbers that are visible from your bed, you need to turn it around…or remove it from the room entirely, says Jacob Teitelbaum, MD, author of the book From Fatigued to Fantastic!
    Clocks in the room can heighten our insomnia anxiety. Our brains are trying to wind down and fall asleep fast, but we’re watching the time slip by, and the stress hormone cortisol is rising in the brain…which keeps us awake. Dump the clock, and you don’t know how long it’s taking you to fall asleep. That in and of itself can make the transition from wide awake to dreaming go faster.
    Temperature: Growing up, we learned that the average body temperature is 98.6 degrees, and that’s a sign of health. What you might not have learned is that your body temperature fluctuates during the day, and it tends to drop at night. That’s because body temperature and sleep are directly linked.
    As researchers Kazue Okamoto-Mizuno and Koh Mizuno explained in a sleep and thermoregulation study published in 2012 in the Journal of Physiological Anthropology, “heat exposure increases wakefulness and decreases slow wave sleep and rapid eye movement sleep.” Meanwhile, the researchers found, the relationship between your sleep–wake rhythm and the circadian rhythm of your body’s core temperature is important for maintaining sleep.
    In other words: If your room is too hot, you’re not going to fall asleep quickly (or maybe at all!) The optimal temperature for a room—according to the science—is between about 60 and 67 degrees Fahrenheit if you’re wearing pajamas and using a sheet. If you sleep in the buff and skip out on any sort of covering (no sheet, no blankets), the researchers say you can dial up the temperature to as high as 89 degrees.
    Sounds: Some people need strict silence to fall asleep, while others struggle if it’s too quiet. If you’re the former, a white noise machine may help block out distracting street sounds, White says.
    If you’re in the latter camp, playing relaxing music (think Johann Sebastian Bach, not Justin Bieber) has scientifically backed benefits. According to a 2008 study published in the Journal of Advanced Nursing, listening to classical music can reduce sympathetic nervous system activity and decrease anxiety, blood pressure, heart, and respiratory rate. In turn, those help soothe the body off to dreamland.
    Scents: Aromatherapy may not be a fast fix, but it could be the answer to the question of how to fall asleep without medication.
    Teitelbaum says there are benefits to relaxing essential oils in the bedroom. Although much is anecdotal, at least one study has shown lavender, in particular, has a soporific effect. It might be worth a spritz of the pillow…at least! And yes, you should stop rolling your eyes at the friend who is always blathering on about their diffuser and essential oils on Facebook now.

  • Body

    Prepping your room will only get you so far when it comes to cutting your sleep onset latency. Your body has to be ready too.
    Cut back on caffeine and alcohol: The stimulating effects of caffeine help wake up the more than half of Americans who suck down at least one cup of coffee every day. But caffeine’s effect on the adenosine receptors can make falling asleep fast impossible, especially if you’re drinking coffee or soda after 4 p.m., Woltering says.
    Alcohol, on the other hand, may well allow you to fall asleep or even help you to fall asleep. The trouble comes later in the night, when your body tries to transition into REM sleep.
    “Alcohol actually suppresses REM (rapid eye movement) sleep,” Woltering explains. “We still have a lot to learn about sleep and alcohol. What is fascinating is that researchers are beginning to link chronic alcohol intake with the development of psychopathology. Our brains crave dream sleep and if they don’t get it, pressure starts to build up in our brains to have more of it. Now, it may be—and this is speculative—that some of the delirium that you see with chronic alcoholism may be explained by the brain starting to dream while we’re still ‘awake.’ REM sleep is bleeding through in our waking lives!”
    Unfortunately, the way alcohol affects REM sleep can mean you fall asleep easily at first, but after your body awakens during REM sleep, you can’t fall back to sleep.
    Plan your exercise wisely: Remember when you were a kid, and you were absolutely wiped out at the end of a long day of running around with your friends? Most of us spend a whole lot of time sitting on our rear ends and not a lot of time tiring our bodies out. Increasing the amount of exercise you get to at least 150 minutes per week has been linked to improved sleep quality.
    But White is quick to advise that patients sneak in their workouts early in the day if possible. Working out before bedtime may tire out your muscles, but stimulating activity that raises your heart rate can actually keep you up.
    Get comfy: If you’re a dedicated morning shower person, it might be time for a change. Night showers (or baths) have been shown to help us get to sleep faster, because they lower the body temperature, which works in conjunction with a cooler bedroom to signal to the body that it’s time to dream.

    But don’t get too cool! The same scientists who found overheating could keep us up found that being too cool could have the same effect. One quick fix that’s backed by science? Throw on a pair of socks to keep your tootsies from getting too cold. If you sleep with a partner, they’ll appreciate not being woken up by a cold foot to the leg!
    Another piece of getting comfy is considering your food choices. Large meals shortly before bedtime can weigh heavy in the gut and keep you awake, White says, so it’s wise to get dinner over with well before you plan to hit the sack. If you’re absolutely starving, stick with something small (and non-caffeinated).
    Get help: Even if you’re trying to avoid medication to help you sleep, your doctor can advise you on whether you should try melatonin (a natural supplement that mimics the body’s own sleep hormones), check to see if any medications you’re currently taking could be keeping you awake, and test you for health issues that might make it harder to fall asleep.

  • Mind

    The leading cause of insomnia, at least among women, is anxiety. White calls it ruminating—while other people fall off to sleep, the issues they’re facing in their day-to-day life keep them tossing and turning.
    Get help: This type of insomnia is what White calls “psychophysiological insomnia.” Once the mental health concern is addressed, the insomnia should go away. Seeking help via a therapist is one means to make a difference.
    Meditate: If you don’t feel like your problems have reached the level of speaking to a physician, 15 to 20 minutes per day of meditation has been linked to better sleep. As Light Watkins, meditation teacher and author of the book Bliss More: How to Succeed in Meditation Without Really Trying, tells HealthyWay, “The time you spend meditating will get refunded back to you in time you’re not wishing you were sleeping deeper.”

    Set up a routine: Kids aren’t the only ones whose minds wind down when they follow through the same steps each evening.
    “Parents have long known that creating a sleep routine, such as a bedtime story, eases children into sleep,” Teitelbaum says. “Adults are no different. Setting up a relaxing bedtime routine, such as reading a book, or having a hot Epsom salt bath with a glass of wine, trains us to fall easily into sleep. Don’t expect to go from high stress right into sleep, any more than you would expect a child to do so!”
    Trick yourself: If all else fails, a little reverse psychology may be the key to how you fall asleep fast and stay that way. Studies have found that trying to force ourselves to stay awake instead of trying to go to sleep can have a paradoxical effect. Essentially, our sleep onset latency speeds up because we’re telling ourselves not to fall asleep.

Categories
Conscious Beauty Lifestyle

6 Natural Deodorants That Work (And What To Know When Making The Switch)

Like many health and beauty products, traditional deodorant sticks contain a lot of synthetic and chemical ingredients.
So, whether you’ve never used deodorant (but recently decided you need it) or you’re trying to clean up your act in terms the products you buy and use on your body, natural deodorant can be an attractive option.
I, for one, never wore deodorant until a few months ago. Then I moved to the Sunshine State, where the only seasons are hot and hotter. Things got real sweaty, real quick.
I was pregnant at the time, so I wanted to try a natural deodorant that was free from harmful chemicals, but I was also skeptical about whether any natural deodorants would work as well as traditional Speed Stick.
In addition to trying natural deodorant out for myself, I spoke with deodorant pros (yes, they exist) and dermatologists to get the facts on natural deodorants so we can all say a healthy sayonara to stinky pits once and for all.

What’s the deal with regular deodorant?

According to Caitlin Hoff, a health and safety investigator at ConsumerSafety.org who also blogs for the watchdog group, “Aluminum compounds are the most commonly criticized chemical components of traditional deodorants.”
Aluminum salts, which are found in most antiperspirant deodorants, work by dissolving on the skin to form a thin gel on its surface, which temporarily clogs your pores and stops you from sweating.
And if that means less sweating (and stinking), then what’s so bad about aluminum?
Unfortunately, public discourse has linked aluminum-based deodorants to everything from breast cancer to Alzheimer’s disease, but there’s little proof to back up those claims. However, Hoff says that people with sensitive skin or allergies do need to be careful when using traditional deodorants.
“Aluminum-based ingredients can cause skin irritation by covering pores and reducing sweat flow. A buildup of this sweat underneath the skin leads to irritation and in some cases small bumps in the skin.”
Jennifer Stagg, a biochemist, naturopathic doctor, and author, warns consumers to watch out for some hard-to-pronounce ingredients in traditional deodorants as well. “Some of the more harmful ingredients to look out for include triclosan, imidazolidinyl urea, methylparaben, propylparaben, and even fragrance,” Stagg tells HealthyWay.
Triclosan and imidazolidinyl urea are antimicrobial ingredients added to many health and beauty products. Some short-term studies have shown that triclosan can affect thyroid levels, but according to the U.S. Food & Drug Administration (FDA), there hasn’t been enough research to draw definite conclusions about triclosan’s safety.
Imidazolidinyl urea, however, has been shown to adversely affect human health. Because this deodorant ingredient actually forms a formaldehyde compound, people who are allergic to formaldehyde could be at risk for developing an allergic reaction to deodorants that contain imidazolidinyl urea.
Methylparaben and propylparaben, the other two ingredients Stagg warns against, are preservatives. Parabens can be endocrine disruptors and may be responsible for certain hormonal imbalances.
Yikes.

Should you go au naturel?

The nice thing about natural deodorants, says Hoff, is that they are made of natural ingredients. She goes on to say, “Those simple ingredients of essential oils and botanical extracts can leave you smelling just as fresh as a traditional deodorant without the possible irritation or chemical harm to both the body and environment.”
Be careful, though. Not all natural deodorants are created equal, and it can be easy to duped by a product that claims to be all natural but isn’t.
How can you tell if a natural deodorant really is all natural?
Stagg says the best thing to do is visit the Skin Deep Database, a resource put together by the Environmental Working Group, a non-profit organization that promotes consumer awareness for healthier living.
The Skin Deep Database explains the ingredient information for thousands of products, including deodorants, so you can make an informed decision about which natural deodorant to try.

Does natural deodorant really work?

So first things first: Although we use the words deodorant and antiperspirant pretty much interchangeably (or at least I do), there’s a big difference between the two.
Deodorants simply mask odors, but antiperspirants, as the name suggests, are actually designed to temporarily stop you from sweating.
Most traditional deodorants on the market are actually antiperspirants that both smell good and keep sweaty pits at bay.
So will natural deodorant work?
Yes and no.
Yes, natural deodorant will mask body odor so that you don’t show up to your hot date smelling like the contents of a Diaper Genie.
But natural deodorants are not as good at stopping perspiration because they don’t contain aluminum.
So, if you work up a good sweat (hopefully in the sack with your hot date or during an endorphin-boosting workout) you may need to experiment with a few different kinds of natural deodorants to find one that works for you.

What’s actually in natural deodorant?

The nice thing about natural deodorants is that most of their ingredients are extremely accessible. Unlike the laboratory compounds contained in traditional deodorants, most natural deodorant ingredients can be found in your local health food store. Some of the top ingredients that make natural deodorants work are baking soda, arrowroot powder, coconut oil, beeswax, and essential oils for fragrance.
Sodium bicarbonate, aka baking soda, is the ingredient that takes the place of aluminum in most natural deodorants. It absorbs sweat and neutralizes odor and is considered much safer than aluminum, although some natural deodorant users report that baking soda can cause skin irritation. Certain natural deodorants created specifically for people with sensitive skin nix the baking soda and include diatomaceous earth instead, which is a less abrasive, naturally occurring, crumbly sedimentary mineral rock (kind of like talc).
Arrowroot powder is a binding agent, similar to cornstarch, that when combined with coconut oil helps natural deodorant form a paste. Beeswax is added to natural deodorants in stick form to help keep its shape, and essential oils are used in scented natural deodorants to give them an appealing fragrance.
Ready to try a natural deodorant? Here are six of the top-rated natural deodorants on the market:

Primally Pure Natural Deodorant

Primally Pure Natural Deodorant lets you know right away that it is not an antiperspirant. You will sweat while wearing Primally Pure (as with most natural deodorants). Still, Primally Pure gets rave reviews from customers, like Liselle DeGrave, who says, “I myself use the Primally Pure deodorant and love it! It doesn’t stop you from sweating as our bodies need to sweat, however it does combat odor. I have tried Tom’s of Maine and Traders Joe’s deodorant and nothing works like Primally Pure’s product.”
Primally Pure comes in great scents like lemongrass and lavender, but you can also get an unscented deodorant if you have allergies or sensitive skin. Their deodorants are contained in BPA-free packaging.
Right now, you can only order Primally Pure on their website.

NONIKO Deodorant

Sephra Regan founded her all-natural skincare line NONIKO after beating cancer. NONIKO deodorant, like Primally Pure, comes in a convenient stick form and is scented using only therapeutic grade essential oils.
NONIKO deodorant comes in really alluring scents, like bergamot/grapefruit, but the company does warn that those with sensitive skin may have a reaction to the baking soda found in the deodorant.
NONIKO deodorants can be purchased online at nonikoskin.com or on Amazon (where they’re Prime eligible!)

Trim Mama Hippie Stick

Trim Healthy Mama Hippie Sticks come in a fun tie-dye stick form and include scented, unscented, and baking soda–free options.
The scented version, which features fragrances akin to an all-natural bouquet, really does smell great (perfectly floral without being reminiscent of your grandmother’s powder room). The unscented version simply smells like coconut oil (which does NOT smell like coconut).
Hippie Sticks can be purchased through Trim Healthy Mama’s website, on Amazon, and through other online retailers.

Schmidt’s Natural Deodorant

One of the more widely available natural deodorants on the market, Schmidt’s can be purchased in most stores, including Target. Schmidt’s also gets points for their sensitive skin line, which does not contain baking soda but does contain magnesium, which helps slow sweating but won’t make your pits break out.
Schmidt’s also comes in at a lower price point than some of the natural deodorants on this list. And best of all, Schmidt’s is considered one of the best cruelty-free deodorants on the market, so you can feel good about your purchase and smell good at the same time!

Primal Pit Paste

While we’ve listed only stick deodorants so far, most natural deodorants, like Primal Pit Paste, actually come in a jar. The difference is that most natural deodorant sticks contain beeswax (to get the consistency right), whereas pastes don’t require that component.
Using a deodorant paste is sometimes a little messier because you have to apply it with your fingers, but it works just as well as or better than a natural deodorant stick.
Primal Pit Paste is great because you can actually purchase different strengths (level 1, 2, or 3) based on how sweaty or stinky you get. They recommend starting at a level 2, which is the level sold in stores.
Primal Pit Paste can be purchased in most natural grocery stores and is available on Amazon.

Thinksport

Thinksport stands out as a leader in natural personal care products. People rave about their sunscreen, and now the company’s released a line of all-natural deodorants in several great scents like grapefruit/currant and chamomile/citrus.
One of the things that stands out about Thinksport is their commitment to the health and safety of the environment. Their packaging and products do not contain any known carcinogens or other harmful chemicals, and they do not test on animals.
Thinksport’s natural deodorant is another affordable option that will keep your pits stink-free. Best of all, Thinksport is available on Amazon Prime. Two-day shipping for the win!

Crystal Deodorant

For those who really want to go natural, look no further than Crystal deodorant, which is a bit different from other natural deodorants on the market. According to a Crystal spokesperson, Crystal’s deodorant is “a unique gem-like stone made of all natural mineral salt, which forms a protective barrier that actually prevents odor-causing bacteria.”
While you are actually rubbing a rock on your pits, Crystal deodorant still comes in a tube just like regular deodorant, and you apply it while the skin is wet, just after a shower or bath.
Does it work?
According to many reviews, yes, it actually prevents body odor. And just like the other natural deodorants you might try, it does not prevent sweating.
Crystal’s website states that one tube of Crystal deodorant will last for a year, which makes it the most economical natural deodorant option available.
In addition to being sold online, Crystal deodorant can also be found in most drugstores, like Walgreens and CVS.

Ready to make the switch?

Are you ready to make the switch to natural deodorant? Before you do, you may want to detox your pits.
An armpit detox might sound a little crazy, but it can help remove the buildup of chemicals that may have accumulated in your skin while using traditional deodorant.
An armpit detox will also help your body adjust more quickly to natural deodorant, which means you won’t sweat as profusely as your body adjusts to your new deodorant of choice.
Rebekah Epling, who makes her own natural beauty products, shares her armpit detox recipe:

All-Natural Armpit Detox

  • 1 ½ teaspoons Bentonite clay, which is available online and in most health food stores
  • ½ teaspoon turmeric, found in the spice aisle of most grocery stores
  • 2 or 3 drops of tea tree or manuka essential oil (Manuka oil is a bit harder to find—you’ll probably have to order it online—but it has three times the antifungal properties of tea tree oil, so it’s more effective as a detox ingredient.)
  • 1 ½ teaspoons witch hazel or apple cider vinegar (Look for witch hazel that is double distilled and doesn’t contain a high amount of alcohol—opt for something that contains less than 10 percent.)

Mix the first three ingredients together in a plastic or glass bowl with a non-metal utensil, then add the witch hazel or apple cider vinegar to create a paste-like consistency (you may need more or less witch hazel than the recipe calls for to create a paste).
Rub the mixture onto your armpit and let dry completely, about 10 to 15 minutes. Use a wet washcloth to remove.

DIY Deodorant

Now that you’ve considered an armpit detox, why not gear up to make your own natural deodorant, too? This natural deodorant recipe is super easy to make and will last more than long enough for you to use it up.

Natural Deodorant Recipe:

  • ¾ cup arrowroot powder (Similar to cornstarch, arrowroot powder is a thickening agent that can be purchased at most health food stores.)
  • ¼ cup baking soda
  • 4 to 6 tablespoons melted organic coconut oil
  • 6 to 10 drops of essential oil (Essential oils are optional, but you can add your favorite essential oil, like lavender, to give your deodorant a fragrance.)

Combine the arrowroot powder and the baking soda. Add 4 tablespoons of coconut oil and mix. Add more coconut oil if needed to achieve the consistency you want. Add in essential oil(s) if desired.
Store in an airtight container. To use, simply apply a small amount to your armpits as needed and let dry.

Categories
Lifestyle

These Are The Bathroom Habits It's Time To Ditch

The bathroom: To some, it’s a sanctuary, a place for long candle-lit baths and elaborate self-care rituals.
HealthyWayTo others, it’s a necessary evil, every inch covered in pathogens.
As with anything else, the reality is somewhere in between. Think of your bathroom as a series of water-powered tools: sink, shower, toilet. Tools are only as good as you are at using them. We hate to tell you this, but there’s a decent chance your bathroom technique could use some work.
HealthyWayYep, you’ve been using the bathroom wrong. We’re talking about mistakes like…

1. Taking long, hot showers.

This is the most heartbreaking fact in the world, but those luxurious, toasty showers on a crisp fall morning could actually be ruining your skin. Before you cry, “You can take my hot showers when you pry them from my cold, dead fingers,” hear us out.
Actually, hear out board-certified dermatologist Joel Schlessinger, MD, who knows way more than we do about skincare.
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“Long, hot showers actually dry the skin,” Schlessinger tells HealthyWay, to the newsroom’s great despair. “The heat and moisture dilate blood vessels and open pores—a set-up to lose moisture. Evaporation afterward aggravates the loss of hydration.”
Even worse, that bliss-inducing stream of hot water blasts away the skin’s natural oils. The shower stream is a perfect storm for dry skin.


“Our skin has proteins, fats, and oils that protect it and help keep it plump,” explains Claire Martin, a nutritionist and former esthetician who also writes for BeingHealthfull.com. “Heated elements from furnaces to hot water can strip our skin of this natural protection.”
Ugh. We don’t want to choose between the sweet sensation of a hot morning shower and healthy skin. So what can we do to limit the damage after indulging in a steamy soak?

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“I always recommend applying a moisturizer on skin after lightly towel drying,” Schlessinger says.
Other experts we spoke to were less permissive. Many health care professionals recommend avoiding hot showers entirely, if you have the courage to do that.
“Make sure to limit your showers to 10 minutes in warm water (not hot water),” Rebecca Lee, registered nurse and founder of RemediesForMe.com, told us. “Pat dry with your towel and apply a lotion to the skin afterwards to keep the skin moisturized.”
Lee is not alone in her preference for the tepid scrub. Fayne Frey, MD, is the board-certified dermatologist behind the FryFace consumer assistance site; she gave us the cold, hard truth about long, hot showers. It turns out that we’re working against nature when we indulge.
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“The skin moisturizes itself,” Frey says.
However, she explains, “The problem with long hot showers is that they remove these necessary compounds that the skin needs. Hot water and soap cannot distinguish between the dirt and unwanted residue [and] the helpful, necessary proteins and lipids the skin needs to stay moist. It is definitely a mistake to take long hot showers.”
Huh. Maybe we’ll just stop with the showers entirely, then, or at least limit them considerably—which brings us to our next point.

2. Showering too often.

Showering habits differ considerably from country to country, as The Atlantic reports here. And the less-frequent showerers of the world aren’t suffering from their lack of steam-time, our experts tell us.
“Daily showering is a cultural habit,” explains Frey. “There is no consensus on how often a person with healthy skin needs to shower. Yes, a person’s odor may change with fewer showers as bacterial flora changes on the skin.”

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That last point seems to be the cultural rub here in the States. We don’t have much tolerance for the natural scent of our own bodies. But don’t mistake an odor for a health problem. People who take fewer showers—or even zero showers—don’t face a greater risk of skin problems than the folks who soak every day, Frey explains.
“I’ve been to parts of the world where the residents have no access to water and rarely if ever shower,” she says. “They have no more skin infections than the Western countries.”
We’re addicted to our showers in the United States. It’s part of our cultural make-up. If you doubt this fact, try showering once a month. Announce your plan to the whole office and check out the reaction.
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So instead of going cold turkey on hot showers, maybe we should start by limiting ourselves to a more minimal cleaning routine—unless, that is, you’re an unusually sweaty or oily person.
“We like to shower daily,” Martin says. “But it’s not really necessary unless you’re a naturally sweaty person or you like to hit the gym seven days a week … I would recommend showering every other day if you [don’t engage in] strenuous, sweat-inducing activity daily, and seem prone to dry skin year-round.”

3. Using (most) soap on anything but your hands.

Your typical bar of soap is designed to cut through oils, which unfortunately include the natural protective substances that keep your skin healthy. Luckily, Frey says, “There are many types of cleansers.” While we often call all of them “soap,” there’s actually a very particular definition for this ubiquitous skin cleanser.

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“Soap, an alkali salt, has a pH of 9-10,” Frey explains. (The pH level of natural skin is about 4.7.) “[Soap is] harsh and very drying to the skin … Non-soap cleansers called syndet bars and soap-free lipid cleansers are more pH friendly … and therefore much less harsh or drying. But they also remove the … compounds necessary for skin health.”
Great. So if even the soap-free cleansers are drying out our skin, what should we use when we start to get a little too ripe to go out in public?
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“Use a mild soap designed for ‘sensitive skin’ instead,” says Lee. “An oil-based cleanser is also beneficial for replacing the natural oils that the skin loses during showers and baths.”
Gina Pulisciano, esthetician and founder of Alchemy Holistics, trusts all-natural bar soaps to be friendlier to the skin.
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“Go for natural soaps whenever possible,” she advises. “I like using bar soaps free of tallow. You can also use castile soap, such as Dr. Bronner’s.”
Whatever you do, don’t fall for the old body-wash-and-sponge routine, she says.
“Avoid using those shower sponges if you can,” Pulisciano tells us. “They’re breeding grounds for bacteria.”

4. Brushing with an old toothbrush.

Quick, think about how long you’ve had your current toothbrush. If you can’t remember, it’s probably time for a new one.
HealthyWay“Toothbrushes should be replaced every three months,” says Meenal Patel, DMD, dentist and founder of Preston Dental Loft in Cary, North Carolina. “If you use an electric toothbrush, the same rules apply.”
Patel’s response is right in line with the American Dental Association, which says you should replace your toothbrush “approximately every 3–4 months or sooner if the bristles become frayed with use.”
Oh, and if you get sick, don’t use that contaminated toothbrush without cleaning it.
HealthyWay“Bacteria and viruses can live on … toothbrush bristles for weeks,” Lee says. “Deep cleaning your toothbrush after every use can help you fight off the microorganisms faster and … feel better better quicker.”
To deep clean toothbrush bristles, Lee recommends soaking them in hydrogen peroxide for 10 minutes. Of course, she adds, you could always just get a new toothbrush. It’s probably time for that, anyway.

5. Flushing with the seat open.

By now, you’ve probably heard of the toilet plume, that microscopic mushroom cloud of…you know…that sails out of your toilet every time you flush. If not, well, we’re sorry to be the ones to tell you: Toilet plumes are real.
Whatever’s in your toilet, it’s there in the plume. Whatever’s in the plume, well, it could easily get on your toothbrush, your soap dish, or even your rubber ducky. If it’s in the bathroom, it’s fair game for a toilet plume—which can carry some serious nasties.
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Let’s get gross.
“E. coli and Salmonella in bathrooms can cause stomach illnesses such as stomach aches, cramps, diarrhea, and vomiting,” Lee says. “These bacteria are transferred to the bathroom through fecal matter. They are commonly found on bathroom surfaces, so make sure to close the toilet seat before each flush and to wash your hands thoroughly.”
Beat the plume. Please. For your own good, beat the plume.

6. Using toilet paper.

Yep, you read that right. Toilet paper is dry and harsh and way too rough for the tender parts of the body. (Hey, you’re reading an article about “Bathroom Habits.” What did you expect?)
A world without toilet paper might not be as horrifying as you think. In fact, there’s already an excellent technology that could lead to a happier life from top to bottom, so to speak.
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“In my professional opinion, it’s time for toilet paper to give way to a superior form of personal cleansing,” says Jamie Gold, a San Diego-based certified kitchen designer and author of New Bathroom Idea Book (2017, Taunton Press). “There’s increasing availability of bidet toilets and bidet seats to make water cleaning and drying available.”
Even better, today’s bidets offer heated streams.
“Warm water is a more thorough and less abrasive form of hygiene than paper, and is favored by millions of users in Europe and Asia,” Gold says. “It’s starting to take root here in North America, too.”
We should certainly hope so. After all, we have to give up our hot showers. At least some part of us deserves a nice, warm spritz every now and then.

Categories
Motherhood

Real Moms Reveal 6 Useless Baby Registry Items (And What To Buy Instead)

Drawn like a moth to the flame.
That’s me when it comes to baby registries.
I love researching baby products. I might even call it a hobby of mine. So when it came to registering for each of my four pregnancies, I have truly loved cultivating the perfect list of exactly what my baby needed—and what my mama heart desired.
With my first baby, we needed everything, obviously. My husband and I decided to keep our first baby’s gender a surprise, so much of what we registered for was basic and gender neutral: a black car seat, a red stroller, lots of solid-colored onesies, and simple swaddles. When our daughter was born (surprise!), I put the gift cards we received to use and added headbands and other pretties to her collection.

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Three baby boys followed over the coming years, and with each one, my registry became more and more specific. We needed less (since many baby items can thankfully be re-used) and knew more (since I had learned what was and wasn’t actually useful during the baby days).
Here’s what I, and many other moms, have learned: Some items marketed to parents and their little ones sound amazing, especially to newbies, but in the end, they turn out to be a complete waste of space and money. Luckily, a bevy of real moms are ready to give you the scoop on what purchases fall in to the useless category and what you should buy instead.
So, pay attention and adjust your registry accordingly! Delete those useless items and prepare to invest in the things real moms love, use, and swear by.

First up, the useless items:

The pointless companion for diaper changes.

No fewer than 10 moms I talked to said that a wipe warmer is 100 percent useless.

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In the beginning they all thought it was a good idea—after all, who wants to shock their baby’s bum with a cold wipe? But in reality, the wipe warmer takes up space and doesn’t work as effectively as promised. Krystle, a mom of two, says that “as soon as you take them out, they are already cold again!”

The gift that piles up quickly.

You think you might need 10 baby blankets, but you don’t. Even if they’re really cute, soft, or sentimental.

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Jeanette, a mom of one, says she received at least eight blankets at her shower, but she really only uses three. So be selective and know that the ones you get and use will become the favorites!

The item that’s actually dangerous.

As more information about crib bumpers’ dangers has come out—27 accidental deaths related to them occurred between the 1985 and 2005—the American Association of Pediatrics now warns parents against using them.

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Yes, without one, your crib might look bare, but bare is the safest option. When it comes to crib prep, just buy a quality mattress, a fitted waterproof pad to make middle of the night leaks easy to remedy, and a handful of fitted sheets.

The foam you should forget.

Erika, a mom of three: “My kiddos didn’t like the Bumbo, and their thighs were so chubby they couldn’t have used it more than a few weeks at best anyway.”

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Blue Maize

“It’s just not ideal to try to make babies sit up before they’re ready,” says Jeanette, and physical therapists agree, stating that there are no developmental benefits.

The bath time non-essential.

“The little kneeling pad for bath time was useless,” says Tasha, a mom of two. “I have never used it, ever.”

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Fisher Price (via What Baby Needs List)

While it might be convenient, it’s certainly not essential. Skip that and invest in quality bath toys (which can really grow with your baby over the years) and a compact baby bath tub.

The stuff that fills the drawers.

Last but not least, the biggest temptation when it comes to tiny babies are all the precious little outfits! But, consider following Kari’s advice when you are browsing clothes for your registry. As a mom of four, she knows what she is talking about!

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“… we got so many clothes with our first that it honestly made life more complicated. By baby boy number three, we had it down to a small capsule wardrobe—with the exception of enough good onesies for potential blow outs.” That’s right, capsule your kid’s wardrobe and embrace the ease and simplicity of less in the laundry department. Babies really don’t need much!

Now, what you should buy instead:

A diaper bag with specific features.

Lots of baby gear means you need a place to put it when you’re on the go, but not just any diaper bag will do. Some mamas want a specific color or material, others are on the lookout for something that looks more like a purse than a baby bag. According to Rose, a mom of four, every mom needs to look for one specific feature in her diaper bag: backpack straps.

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Albee Baby

You want a bag that will allow you to be hands free, she says, and the ability to be worn like a backpack makes that happen.

The absolute must!

Babies love to be close—they’ve been cozy and warm inside mama’s womb for months, after all! That’s why a baby carrier is a must have on your registry. In fact, Jeannette, a mom of two, said “the only thing I couldn’t live without is my carrier(s)!”

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When it comes to carriers, there are quite a few to choose from.
It can be overwhelming, so consider registering for a couple of these top picks from seasoned moms who’ve tested many throughout their mothering years: Boba Baby Wrap, Moby Ring Sling, Ergobaby 360 carrier, Tula Free-to-Grow carrier, and Lillebaby wrap or carrier.
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Solly Baby Wrap (via Project Nursery)

Bottom line, whatever you choose, make sure it’s an ergonomic carrier that supports your baby’s development.

All the things that disappear.

If you’re aiming to fill your registry with a variety of useful items, think consumables!

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Between mom and baby, you’re going to go through lots of diapers, nursing pads, wipes, baby soap, and lotion. Add large quantities of each to your registry, and all the wise gift givers will help you stock up with these less fun, but definitely essential items.

Not just any car seat.

When it comes to choosing a car seat, The Car Seat Lady cites four sources—the American Academy of Pediatrics and peer-reviewed articles in Injury Prevention, Pediatrics, and British Medical Journal—that say rear facing are safer than forward facing. In some states, it’s actually the law that car-traveling children face the rear for at least two years.

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That means you should register for a seat that can face the rear as long as possible. And by finding a rear-facing seat that has high height and weight limits, you won’t have to upgrade seats as often. The Graco 4Ever All-in-One Convertible Car Seat will give you up to 10 years of use with its ability to transform from a rear-facing baby seat to a forward-facing toddler car seat…to a booster seat.

And, what you should consider borrowing:

The big stuff doesn’t have to be a permanent fixture in your home.

So often, I see registries full of substantial baby “furniture.” Things like the widely loved and oft-recommended Rock ’n Play, swings, and bouncers. Each of these items have definitely earned their place as baby must, but do you really need to buy them?
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The answer is no, and the reason is that their lifespan is pretty short. Your little one will quickly reach the weight limit and outgrow them with their abilities. Sometimes by four months, sometimes by six, and for sure by eight or nine. That’s why I, and many of the moms I talked to, recommend borrowing these larger items from a family member or friend. Since they aren’t used for a long stretch of time, they’re often in great condition, and parents are happy to move those big items out of storage.

Back-ups, seconds, and extras.

Think you may want a carrier at grandma and grandpas? How about a car seat in dad’s car? Rather than register for doubles, consider asking friends if they have a spare that you can borrow or buy for less than full price.

When it comes to filling your baby registry, there is so much to consider.

As you curate your personal registry, be mindful and stick with the absolute essentials. The moms I talked to have been been through it, and some of them have been through it multiple times—they really know what they’re talking about when it comes to both useless and extremely useful baby registry items. Take their advice!
And, hey, if you end up really needing or wanting something we deemed “useless,” there is always a Target close by or quick shipping with Amazon Prime.
Now that you have a better idea of what you should and should not register for, check out these registry sites to get started: Amazon, Target, Buy Buy Baby and Babies “R” Us.

Categories
Conscious Beauty Lifestyle

5 Fast Fixes For Longer, More Luscious Hair

Full disclosure: I’m literally sitting in a salon chair right now as I put the finishing touches on this article, proving I am indeed an ultimate multitasker. My hairstylist, Gret Cook of Bouffant Salon in Portland, Oregon, is touching up my roots and weighing in on some of the best tips and tricks for nourishing and regrowing long hair—fast.
Maybe you’re over your summer bob. Maybe you have badly damaged hair and want to start fresh. Or maybe (sigh, the way it happened to me) you love your recently born mini-me but aren’t loving the way your hair has been falling out in handfuls after giving birth.
No matter the reason you need help with your hair, if you’re determined to go from high and tight to long and luscious in the least time possible, ditch the harsh chemicals, old wives’ tales, and expensive treatments. Instead, check out these clean and green, research-backed lifestyle fixes that can help you get “that look” on the quick.

1. Adjust the water temp.

Not only can that old familiar culprit—the harsh heat of styling tools—damage your hair’s growth process, the ahhhmazingly hot shower you love taking in the evening could also be to blame for breakage. Instead, advice from a dermatologist has us considering switching to cold showers for smoother hair with more moisture locked in.
Another great way to prevent breakage post-shower is to use either a cotton t-shirt or these fantastic anti-frizz microfiber hair towels to dry your locks without the added friction and stress caused by a regular towel.

2. Rapunzel, let down your ponytail.

Even if you’re doing everything else right, sneaky saboteurs like tight ponytails and harsh brushing could be messing with your mane. Prevent breakage by swapping your old rubber hair ties for a new snag-free variety. Cook suggests you can also cut down on breakage by switching to a Wet Brush, which she says “has bristles that are meant to be more flexible and move with the hair while detangling without causing breakage.”

3. Oily hair for the win!

Going through puberty likely gave you the impression that oily hair is an embarrassment to be corrected. But with studies now showing how specific oil treatments can regrow short or thinning strands, you’ll want to give your haircare routine a grown-up makeover.
Rubbing peppermint oil into your scalp can help stimulate growth without any dangerous side effects, according to a 2014 study. Similarly, Cook has personally witnessed great results from using jojoba oil to help hair growth and recommends choosing natural hair products, such as the Kevin Murphy line, that list jojoba as a main ingredient.

4. Supplement your way to glam.

Lack of vitamin D can make hair grow more slowly, according to a 2012 study. Make sure you’re getting enough through your diet, time in the sun, or in an easy hair supplement pill that also contains biotin—another vitamin that may help in hair growth. Cook says she has taken a biotin pill in the past and gotten noticeable results. HUM Nutrition also offers a supplement, Hair Sweet Hair, formulated to support healthy follicles and hair growth.

5. Trim, baby, trim.

You’ve heard that claim that getting frequent trims will help your hair grow out. But haven’t you ever wondered if salons made up this story to drum up more business? My stylist says we should believe the hype, and she’s not alone. “Trimming doesn’t necessarily stimulate growth at the scalp, but since you’re preventing breakage, your hair will grow out faster overall,” Cook tells me. She says depending on your particular hair, shoot for a snip every 6 to 12 weeks.
Remember: How lustrous your hair looks and feels is partially a reflection of how healthy the rest of your body is. Limit and protect against negative environmental factors, like harsh chemicals or styling tools, and boost your haircare routine with healthy additions like vitamins and oils. You should treat your hair holistically, according to Cook, who says, “If you keep your hair in a healthy state overall, it will just generally look better and fuller.”
Following a few of these tips will help you find a winning regimen to take care of your hair and your whole self.

Categories
Wellbeing

4 Secrets That Men Are Keeping From Women

Honesty is an important element in any relationship…but it’s not always easy to tell the truth.
The average person holds onto about 13 secrets, according to a study from researchers at Columbia Business School, which certainly isn’t beneficial for our mental health; the study also showed that people displayed physiological signs of stress when actively concealing their secrets.
HealthyWayFor a couple, secrets can be even more damaging. Both men and women are more than capable of romantic subterfuge, but women tend to be slightly more honest than men, per the National Honesty Index Survey. Meanwhile, men tend to keep more secrets, says a Totally Money poll.
In some cases, keeping secrets makes sense—you probably don’t need to tell your partner that they’ve picked up a few extra wrinkles over the years, for instance—but other secrets can eventually damage a relationship. We spoke with several dating experts, therapists, and psychologists to find out about the secrets that men frequently keep from women (and how those secrets can eventually cause huge issues).

1. Financial secrets are common (and potentially damaging).

According to a CreditCards.com report, one in five Americans have spent $500 or more on purchases without their partner’s knowledge, and about 7.2 million Americans have hidden money from their spouses.
Bonnie Winston, a matchmaker and relationship coach, says, “Money issues are one of the top reasons that break relationships up.”

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Winston told us about one couple’s especially toxic financial habits.
“One couple I set up were both over spenders,” Winston says. “But what was worse was that they hid it from one another. The husband who was a contractor bought a cherry red conspicuous Cadillac and parked it on nearby streets in the community instead of his garage, [accumulating] thousands of dollars in parking tickets.”
“His wife spent over $200,000 a year on designer bags, jewelry, shoes and clothing. As they lived in a McMansion, she actually took one of their 10 bedrooms in another wing and turned it into a large closet, keeping it completely off limits from him.”
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While both men and women fib about their bank accounts, Dr. Caroline Madden, a licensed marriage and family therapist, believes that men are especially prone to keeping financial secrets in order to project strength.
“Men will keep [this] secret if they are struggling to pay the bills,” says Madden. “This happens even within a marriage. He is embarrassed and doesn’t want to worry his wife. He really thinks that he will be able to pull it all together and save the day. This comes as a shock to the wife when her credit cards are declined and the house is being foreclosed on.”
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For men, transparency can be difficult at first. However, building a budget can help both partners build financial stability, which is a key component of a healthy marriage.

2. Many men fake interests, at least at first.

“Many guys will suddenly become interested in what the girl he likes is interested in—music, foods, movies, etc.,” says certified counselor and author David Bennett. “In reality, he may not really like them that much, but feel like it’s an in to get a date. Many men do this early on in a relationship, and eventually turn into their true selves.”

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This is a problem, since this type of secret relies on misleading a partner. That’s not a great way to start a new relationship, especially considering that research shows “practicing” a lie might eventually lead to more lies.
In a study published in Nature Neuroscience, researchers found that the human brain adapts to the process of dishonesty. Little lies feel bad, but over time, the negative emotional feedback all but disappears, allowing a person to repeat lies without feeling bad.
“The amygdala responded a lot the first times people lied, but it went down over time,” lead author Neil Garrett told National Geographic. “We think this is the first empirical evidence that lying escalates.”
That’s the potential danger of these little white lies; while a man might stretch the truth in the first few weeks of a relationship to impress a potential partner, his brain can get used to the process of lying.
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While that’s a pretty scary scenario, it isn’t the worst thing we’ve heard about guys, love, and lying. Amber Madison surveyed more than 1,000 men while writing her book Are All Guys A**holes?, and her results don’t paint a very flattering picture of masculinity. Thirty-five percent of the men Madison surveyed said they would lie “about the degree of commitment they were willing to offer a girl in order to sleep with her,” she wrote, as quoted by Jezebel. Is there any better proof that lies and romance go together like oil and water?

3. Men (and women) often keep secrets about their previous relationships.

Several relationship experts told us that couples often keep their past love lives to themselves.
“Many of my client couples come from diverse pasts, and most have been married previously,” says Eric Hunt, a marriage coach based in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. “Be it a serious relationship or [a] fling, I hear from more men who express they are not comfortable discussing their past relationships.”

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To avoid making waves, men might keep details of past relationships under wraps. According to Hunt, that’s a mistake.
“I always promote honesty and open communication in a relationship,” he says. “The past is the past, but [the truth] will eventually come out…it’s always better for the man to initiate an open and honest conversation, especially prior to marriage.”
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Plus, there’s a pretty good chance that you won’t be able to wish away your memories of romances past even if you want to—and that might give you a better chance of making things work this time around.
Helen Fisher, a senior research fellow at the Kinsey Institute and chief scientific advisor for Match.com, told HuffPost that the human brain is designed to hold onto failed relationships.
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“People will go through long periods after they’ve been dumped or after they dumped somebody asking, ‘Why did I do this? What did I lose? What did I gain?'” Fisher said. “The brain really does remember this, and it remembers this forever. You remember the ones that got away. It’s entirely possible that the brain is built that way so that you can remember why it didn’t work so that you can do it better the next time.”

4. Men frequently hide their emotions, which can result in feelings of loneliness and depression.

“The great secret men keep from their wives is how emotionally vulnerable they are,” says Douglas E. Noll, JD, MA, a professional mediator and author of De-Escalate. “Men are taught to suppress emotions, but that does not mean that they don’t feel them intensely.”

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Marriage Mission

In fact, research suggests that men are just as emotionally sensitive as women—perhaps even more so. A 2014 study conducted by neuropsychologist Dr. David Lewis and released by Royal Mail showed that men experienced more physiological changes in an emotional experiment than their female counterparts; however, they claimed to feel less emotion when prompted.
“This study suggests that men feel emotion just as much as women, sometimes more strongly, but are less willing to express these emotions openly due to expectations put on them by society,” Dr. Lewis said in 2014. “We tend to oversimplify and exaggerate the perceived differences between men and women and are more likely to focus on evidence that supports our existing gender stereotypes.”
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Noll recommends using simple, open communication to bridge the emotional gender gap in a relationship.
“Men often are very lonely because their emotions are overlooked or ignored,” Noll says. “There is a beautiful simple way wives can listen to men and validate them: Ignore the words, guess at the feelings, and reflect back the feelings with a simple ‘you’ statement.”
“Even if they are able to identify and share feelings, most men have a hard time being vulnerable,” says relationship therapist Rhonda Milrad.
HealthyWay“They want to appear confident and self-assured with their partner and a person upon whom their partner can rely. [It’s] hard for them to share their fears, worries and their feelings of inadequacy and insecurity. Consequently, men tend to have a secret emotional life that they hide from their partner… This impacts their ability to be intimate, fully present and connected.”
Of course, both partners need to commit to honest communication in order for this method to be effective. The good news: Once a couple begins communicating, the relationship benefits.
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One study reported in The New York Times showed that the best predictor of marital satisfaction was how well partners communicated before the marriage. Another study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family showed that more satisfied spouses “showed more positive, less negative, and more effective communication.”
Secrets aren’t unusual, and they’re not always destructive to a relationship, but strong, clear communication is always preferable.
“Falling in love can be a slippery slope,” says online dating consultant K. Ceakou. “However, maintaining open lines of communication can be the difference between holding on and falling off.”