When we sat down with health and lifestyle coach Jo Encarnacion to talk about her wellness journey and how she maintains such a positive outlook on life, we knew she’d likely drop a few truth bombs on us. We were ready for that.
What we didn’t expect is that she would flip the concept of balance—the ideal that most of us seem to be chasing these days—on its head and present us with an entirely new perspective. Jo shared with us how she stays mindful through busy days, how “messy” can still be strong, and how being intentional allows her to be a role model for her girls.
HealthyWay: You’ve spoken about how a “messy” life can still be a beautiful life—a perspective that says so much about your overall mindset. How did you come to embrace this perspective?
Jo Encarnacion: I have this strong belief that we are all in the messy middle of our stories, still trying to redefine ourselves, our health, and how we move through our lives in our bodies. So to me when I think of “messy” I think of it as an unfolding of the journey we’re on. I see it as the part of our stories we’re still trying to sort out and … when we can sit and honor that, we find the most strength and the answers to what we’ve been searching for.
Do you have specific practices or routines that help you to maintain your positive outlook?
I use the Five Minute Journal app and recently was given the physical journal. I love it because it allows me to write down things I’m grateful for and tap into that mindfulness first thing in the day. I also honor my body by moving first thing in the morning. This might mean I’m heading straight to the gym to work out or lift, a SoulCycle class, or simply stretching—a simple cat to cow variation or simple Sun A flow. [Sometimes] I walk outside and just take in fresh air!
You have a lot going on in your life—you’re a mom, you run your own business, and you’re prioritizing your health and well-being. How do you create balance and stay mindful through all of it?
I think balance is something we’re always going to be working too hard to chase; I personally believe in harmony more than balance. I strive for harmony in my life and … like to think about harmony [similar to how] an a cappella group sings in harmony—you have a mixture of highs and lows, but everything together [creates] one beautiful song.
So this is how I look at all the areas [I’m juggling in my life]. It’s a beautiful mess, and all things aren’t always equally going well, but when I step back to look at the holistic picture, it’s really beautiful. [As for] how I practice mindfulness in my life … I look at my values and see how all actions, things I do, people I encounter, experiences I’m a part of all intertwine with [one another]. If they don’t fit [with my] value[s] then I give it a hard no so I can allow space for all other things to flourish.
Wellness starts with a healthy mindset and also impacts those around us. You’ve gone from bodybuilder to wellness coach promoting a healthy(ish) lifestyle. What impact has your wellness journey and, ultimately, your mindset shift had on your kids?
I see it in such little ways, which excites me the most. Like when Olivia calls berries candy or when she chooses to eat a healthier snack on her own. When it comes to self-love and body acceptance, I want to believe that my children have a stronger sense of self in order to face this world that’s constantly telling them to change.
Some of my intentional choices are to be actively mindful about the conversations about myself and body image around my children. I look to always see the good first before speaking about areas of improvement or growth. We don’t label good or bad foods in the house, rather we refer to them as energy sources and how that affects our energy throughout the day.
Most importantly I try my hardest to model joy in the house, because this world is already super stressful and we need to be able to really showcase joy so our kids can know to seek that in their everyday routines too.
Tag: Featured
Summer is such an amazing time of year, and with it comes a new energy and motivation. Maybe it’s the promise of pooltime—or maybe it’s just our vitamin D levels being restored—that brings out the sunny demeanor in all of us. Either way, the start of summer presents a great opportunity to check in with yourself and on your goals. If you set goals at the start of the new year, how have you progressed? Are they still relevant, or do you need to make a few adjustments?
Whether you’ve got ambitions to run a marathon, nail a one-legged crow, or get your finances in order (so you can make it to the inversions class to nail said one-legged crow), how you go about setting your goals can make all the difference.
To help your hustle, we called on lifestyle coach and self-proclaimed mother hustler Jo Encarnacion to give us her quick and dirty tips to setting and crushing your goals this summer.
Discover.
Self-discovery is incredibly important to both setting and achieving your goals. It helps to dig deep and learn more about yourself. In doing so, you’ll likely discover things that don’t exist on the surface—like what drives you and where you’re most confident.
Stay SMART.
Setting SMART goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and timely is a common practice of businesses and teams. And the process works very well for personal goals too. The acronym serves as a reliable checklist to ensure the goal is well thought out and relevant to your current desires.
Time it out.
When working with clients, I break down large goals similarly to how I work toward my own goals—as smaller one-, three-, and six-month goals. Every two weeks we check in on their progress and make changes based on what’s working and not working. Setting smaller goals and pairing them with action steps helps with continuous progress.
Two Words: Bullet. Journal.
Bullet journaling is my favorite way to make lists! It allows you stay on top of your tasks while tapping into your creative side.
Enroll others.
Regardless of your specific goal, it’s important—and oh so helpful—to have others who can help you through. Find a community of like-minded women who you can look to for advice and lean on for support when necessary. There are countless Facebook groups, in-person meetups, and tools to support you as you work toward achieving your goals; take advantage of them!
Let passion prevail.
Don’t discount the importance of passion when it comes to the hustle. When you’re passionate about what you’re working toward, the goal is much more attainable. Check in to make sure you’re after that which sets your heart ablaze.
The day I discovered that my all-time favorite cocktail, a gin and tonic with lime, could have upwards of 150 calories per serving was the day I suddenly became interested in finding health(ier) alternatives, such as low-sugar and low-calorie cocktails.
Studies about alcohol always seem to arrive at contradictory conclusions. One day the benefits of drinking tequila are front page news and the next day the headlines blast the negative effects alcohol has on your health. That being said, if you’re in the mood to treat yourself to an adult beverage, you might as well enjoy a cocktail (or mocktail) that boasts some nutritional benefits.
Here are some rules of thumb to get you started. And we’ve got a refreshing option for every taste!
Steer clear of dark liquors.
Whenever possible, choose cocktails that call for clear liquor (think vodka, gin, light beer, white tequila, and pisco). Why the distinction between clear and dark liquors? It turns out that dark liquors contain higher amounts of congeners, the chemical responsible for flavoring alcohol and a possible contributor to why dark liquors can make you feel more hungover.
Alcoholic beverages that are higher in congeners include whiskey, bourbon, dark beer, and red wine (one of the worst hangover offenders). Avoid hangovers altogether by enjoying alcoholic beverages in moderation (or not at all) and drinking plenty of water between cocktails.
Ice quality makes a difference.
When it comes to healthier cocktails, quality ingredients are an essential component of achieving a smooth taste. To begin, make sure you’re using filtered water and fresh ice. Tenaya Darlington, co-author of The New Cocktail Hour and Booze & Vinyl, offers this important tip: “Always use fresh ice made from filtered water! If you’re going to splurge for quality spirits, don’t use stale ice. Batching fresh ice a day or two before a party will assure that your drinks taste fresh and crisp, not like stale shrimp or an old bag of peas.”
For clear ice, use filtered water that has been boiled and then cooled to room temperature.
Get inspired by nature.
Maggie Hoffman, author of the The One-Bottle Cocktail: More Than 80 Recipes With Fresh Ingredients and a Single Spirit, is a huge fan of farmers markets.
She says:
“If I learned one thing from writing The One-Bottle Cocktail, it’s that there’s a treasure trove of ingredients at the farmers market. Obviously, you see a lot of mint in cocktails, but other herbs can add fantastic flavor—cilantro and thyme and basil and lemongrass are just a few. I love fennel in all its forms, especially with gin, which already has a wonderful herbal flavor.”
Darlington echoes this sentiment and even uses fresh herbs as a low-key decoration for the table. She says, “Sometimes we gather mint to use as centerpieces for the table and encourage people to try different mints as a garnish. It helps if you group the mint in different jars and label them, then guests get curious about tasting the different kinds.”
She also suggests using pineapple leaves as a garnish, especially if tiki drinks are on the menu: “We love to use pineapple leaves as garnishes for tiki drinks, like the East India cocktail and Planter’s Punch. In the summer, we love to grill pineapple when we bbq, and instead of tossing away the leaves, we always save them for cocktails.”
Use plenty of flower power.
Edible flowers add a beautiful burst of color to cocktails, taking an ordinary mixed drink and making it something truly spectacular. Darlington suggests jazzing up ice cubes with fresh edible flowers: “We like to freeze edible flowers in ice cube trays, then drop them into gin and tonics or into a big punch bowl. There are also lots of summer drinks involving shaved ice, where an edible flower adds stunning color and texture.”
Since flowers can’t be easily washed for consumption, make sure you use organic food-grade flowers from a reputable source.
Sun-kiss with citrus.
Lemons, limes, oranges, and grapefruits add tons of fresh fruit flavor without compromising the calorie count of your cocktail. Remove any traces of wax left on citrus peel by washing the fruit with very hot water for 45 seconds. For optimal juice extraction, roll the fruit under the flat of your palm until the flesh begins to soften.
When zesting citrus peel, make sure you avoid as much of the white pith as possible so you can prevent any overly bitter flavors being added to your cocktail by accident. If you’re left with any extra citrus juice, freeze it in ice cube trays for future use.
Mix it up!
The key to successfully making low-calorie and low-sugar cocktails is all in the right mix. Seltzer water, iced and unsweetened herbal tea, and kombucha are just some of the choices you have when crafting a more health-conscious, low-calorie, and low-sugar cocktail. Simple syrup can be used in moderation to sweeten up low-calorie ingredients, while bitters are used to disrupt and contrast the smoothest of cocktail ingredients.
Basic Simple Syrup Recipe
If your cocktail calls for simple syrup, don’t sweat it. You can whip up a homemade batch in almost the same amount of time it takes to assemble your drink. Simple syrup is made by dissolving sugar in simmering water in a 1:1 ratio. It’s then cooled and can be added to cocktails to impart sweetness without the risk of sugar granules sitting at the bottom of your glass.
This simple syrup recipe can be adapted to suit any taste or cocktail recipe. Add fresh herbs, herbal tea bags, or whole ginger or turmeric to the water as it simmers, and let it steep as the syrup cools before discarding.
Yields:
- 1 cup of simple syrup
Ingredients:
- 1 cup white sugar
- 1 cup filtered water
Special equipment:
- Measuring cup
- Small saucepan
- Squeeze bottle or glass jar for storage
Method:
Combine the sugar, water, and any optional flavoring additions in a small saucepan and bring to a simmer over medium-high heat, allowing the syrup to simmer for 5 minutes. Remove the saucepan from the heat and let the simple syrup cool to room temperature. Discard any solid ingredients and store the syrup in the fridge in a glass jar or plastic squeeze bottle for up to one month.
Turmeric Ginger Mule
This spicy mule gets its kick from an easy-to-make yet potent turmeric and ginger simple syrup, and the use of seltzer water instead of ginger beer keeps this cocktail light and bright. Many cultures have long regarded turmeric as having medicinal value, and there is promising research that it has anti-inflammatory properties and may help fight chronic diseases.
Make this a mocktail by omitting the vodka and adding an extra spritz of lime juice before serving.
Yields:
- 1 serving
Ingredients:
- 1½ oz vodka
- ¾ oz turmeric ginger simple syrup*
- Juice of ½ lime (about 1 Tbsp. total) + lime wedges for garnish
- 4–5 fresh mint leaves
- 3 oz seltzer water
- Crushed or regular ice
*Follow the recipe for basic simple syrup, adding 2 inches of peeled turmeric root and ginger root. Steep the turmeric and the ginger in the syrup until it cools to room temperature. Discard and store in the refrigerator.
Special equipment:
- Shot glass
- Moscow mule copper mug (optional)
- Long-handled bar spoon
Method:
Add the turmeric ginger simple syrup, lime juice, and mint leaves to a mug or serving glass. Using a long-handled bar spoon, gently muddle the mint leaves as you stir. Fill the mug or glass with ice and stir in the vodka, topping with seltzer water to finish. Garnish with a slice of lime.
Vegan Pisco Sour
If you love sours but are also living the vegan life (or are avoiding raw eggs) you’ll be happy to know that the foam in this cocktail comes from aquafaba (the liquid found in cans of chickpeas) instead of the usual egg whites.
Pisco is a high-octane brandy from Peru and Chile that has become an integral ingredient on cocktail menus across North America in recent years.
Yields:
- 1 serving
Ingredients:
- 2 oz pisco
- 1 oz fresh lemon or lime juice (to get juicier results, roll the citrus fruit across the counter with your hands while pressing down before cutting)
- 1 oz simple syrup
- 1 oz aquafaba
- Angostura bitters
Special equipment:
- Shot glass
- Cocktail shaker
- Cocktail or lowball glass
Method:
Combine all of the ingredients (except for the bitters) in a cocktail shaker. Shake for 30 to 45 seconds (aquafaba needs a few extra seconds compared to egg whites) and strain into a glass. Shake 2 to 3 drops of Angostura bitters on the foamy meringue and enjoy!
Spicy Jalapeño Micheladas
These spicy micheladas are perfect for brunches, backyard barbecues, and summer picnics. Made from Mexican lager, spices, lime juice, and tomato or Clamato juice, this michelada recipe can easily be doubled or tripled to serve a crowd.
Yields:
- 3 servings
Ingredients:
- 2 12-oz bottles of cold Mexican lager
- Tajin seasoning
- Juice of 1 lime (about 2 Tbsp.) + extra lime wedges
- 1 tsp. your favorite hot sauce
- ½ tsp. Worcestershire sauce, soy sauce, or Maggi seasoning
- 1 cup tomato or Clamato juice
- 2 Tbsp. finely diced jalapeño pepper, seeds and white pith removed
- ¼ cup finely diced cucumber, seeds and rind removed
Special equipment:
- Pitcher
- Long-handled bar spoon
- Measuring cups and spoons
- 3 beer or highball glasses
- Chef’s knife and cutting board (for dicing the jalapeño and cucumber)
Method:
Rim the glasses using a lime wedge and the Tajin seasoning. In a pitcher, combine and stir together the Mexican lager, juice of one lime, hot sauce, Worcestershire or other flavoring sauce, and tomato or Clamato juice. Spoon the diced cucumber and jalapeño evenly across all three glasses. Carefully pour the micheladas in the glasses, stir once more, and enjoy.
Rosé Kombucha Watermelon Slushie
This gorgeous take on a rosé slushie will immediately become your new favorite summer drink. It’s light, fruity, and makes use of hibiscus ginger kombucha to add a pleasant effervescence to the final cocktail with no added sugar.
Freeze watermelon in bulk and an entire bottle of rosé in ice cube trays; store in freezer bags so that you can make this slushie whenever you feel like it. For a non-alcoholic treat, ditch the rosé and use extra kombucha in its place.
Yields:
- 2 servings
Ingredients:
- 2 cups watermelon, cubed and frozen (seeds removed)
- 1½ cups rosé wine, frozen in ice cube trays
- 1 cup hibiscus ginger kombucha (we love GT’s Enlightened Kombucha)
- 4 mint leaves
- Edible flowers, for garnish
Special equipment:
- Blender
- Measuring cups or spoons
- Highball or large serving glasses
Method:
Add all of the ingredients to the blender and blitz until smooth, adding extra kombucha if needed. Pour in glasses and garnish with mint leaves and edible flowers before serving.
Beet Juice Bloody Marys
Sweet and earthy tasting, beet juice makes an interesting alternative to the tomato juice that is usually added to Bloody Marys. Beet juice has been shown to reduce blood pressure and inflammation, another reason to try this deeply purple take on a brunch classic.
If you don’t have access to a juicer, don’t worry. There are plenty of beet juices on the market (such as Lakewood Juice’s Pure Beet Juice). If possible, give these Bloody Marys 12 hours in the fridge to let the flavors fully develop. For a Bloody Mary mocktail omit the tequila.
Yields:
- 4 servings
Ingredients:
- 4 cups beet juice
- Juice of 1 lime
- Juice of 1 lemon
- 2 tsp. prepared or freshly grated horseradish
- 1 Tbsp. Worcestershire sauce or Maggi seasoning
- Hot sauce, to taste
- 2 Tbsp. pickle brine
- ¾ cup tequila
- Celery stalks (with leafy greens still attached)
- Pickled vegetables (green beans, asparagus, or cucumber spears)
- Lime wedges
- Celery salt
Special equipment:
- Pitcher
- Long-handled bar spoon
- Measuring cups and spoons
Method:
In a pitcher, combine all of the ingredients except for the celery stalks, pickled vegetables, lime wedges, and celery salt. Cover and refrigerate for up to 24 hours before serving. To serve, rim four glasses with lime juice and celery salt and add ice to each glass. Pour the beet Bloody Mary in each glass and garnish with a celery stalk, your choice of pickled vegetables, and extra hot sauce if desired.
We, the badass women of the world, have reached a consensus: Leggings are pants. Let’s face it, black leggings are a wardrobe staple that tells the world I’m chic, comfortable, and could jump into virtually any athletic situation at a moment’s notice.
There’s just one small problem—our best black leggings, the ones we rely on for our early morning runs and sweaty yoga flows, aren’t always conducive to everyday wear. While your go-to LBLs provide support while showing off your shape during your workouts, tight compression can make a four-hour flight a little more uncomfortable than it already is.
Best Black Leggings for Everyday Wear
To help you find the perfect leggings for everyday wear, I trimmed down the seemingly countless options and tested out five of the most popular pairs. From the moment I woke up to the moment I hit the sack, I kept careful (and honest) notes detailing my experiences. Taking factors such as the level of comfort, quality of the waistband, fabric type, and aesthetic appeal into account, I came out with a clear bracket winner. Follow along to see which leggings I deemed the best for everyday wear!
[sol title=”lululemon Align Pant” subheader=”Size 2″]
Was I naked? Was I floating on a cloud? Or was I wearing the most buttery soft pair of leggings? The lululemon Align Pant has unparalleled comfort, taking me from flows at my favorite local yoga studio to lunch at the nearby organic eatery and out for an evening of drinks with the girls. I even toted this matte black legging on a quick trip to Colorado for a round of graduate school interviews. When my world was buzzing and bustling, my outfit was one less thing to worry about.
The thin material hugged every inch of my lower body, from my waist to my ankles. It flaunts a ⅞ length, hitting about 2 ½ inches above my ankles (keep in mind that I’m 5’4”). The key word here is hugged. The leggings fit snugly against my body, but there was no feeling of compression or squeezing. Think of it this way: no residual marks from the seams after taking these leggings off!
If I had to describe this pair in one word, I’d choose angelic.
Pros
The minimal seaming and matte black finish make the lululemon Align Pant one of the best leggings for everyday wear because they’re comfy and cozy, yet polished. Without a single hint of the stereotypical “athletic look,” I happily paired these with everything from checkered Van’s slip ons to boho booties and vintage crop tops to silky kimonos.
The high-rise waistband sits above the belly button and laid flat around the entire circumference of my torso. There is absolutely no digging, pinching, or folding.
The small pocket in the waistband of the Align Pant is best used for a loose key, small wad of cash, or a credit card and ID when you’re out and about on the town. The tapered mouth to this pocket kept my items perfectly secure throughout my daily adventures.
Cons
Due to the thin nature of the material used for the Align legging, these pants are fairly delicate. I would opt out of machine drying altogether to preserve the integrity of the pant. Machine wash on cold with like items (no jeans or zippers—they’ll snag!) and air dry. A hassle? Perhaps, but I can assure you that once you’ve got your hands on these leggings, you’ll want to ensure they last as long as possible, which means giving them proper care.
This pair of leggings also has the priciest tag of the bunch, but trust me when I say that lululemon is providing you with unrivaled quality. That said, if the price tag is a bit outside for your current budget, read on!
Reminds me of: Heaven
[link-button href=”http://fave.co/2D9fGg4″] Get them from lululemon [/link-button]
[sol title=”Old Navy High Rise Compression Leggings” subheader=”Size XS”]
For a pair of leggings that you could wear on the daily, $30 seems like a steal, right?! Well, Old Navy nailed the concept with their High Rise Compression Leggings, but unfortunately under-delivered with the quality. Perhaps it was the fact that these tights had to compete against brands like lululemon and ZELLA, but I was considerably underwhelmed.
In a pinch, heck yes I’ll grab these Old Navy leggings, but it may only happen when they’re the one pair not sitting in my dirty clothes hamper.
Pros
These soft black leggings are tailored through the leg, slimming down from belly button to ankles. They have a cottony finish, reminding me of the traditional legging many of us are familiar with from years past.
Cons
Due to the cottony feel, the High Rise Compression Leggings feel noticeably limited in regards to movement and flexibility. As opposed to the four-way stretch many brands offer these days, this pair of leggings only offers two-way stretch. If you have a tendency to sit in slightly wild, very contorted positions like I do, this may not be the pair for you.
The thin fabric also had a shine to it, which translates into sheerness when bending and hinging. These leggings lacked the matte black finish that complements my everyday attire. Although they didn’t have a standard athletic look, their texture meant they appeared far too casual to pair with cute outfits.
One more “ouch” for this pair of everyday leggings: The material used for the High Rise Compression Leggings is prone to pilling, clinging, and fading.
Reminds me of: The C9 Freedom Legging
[link-button href=”http://fave.co/2BP3tN7″] Get them from Old Navy [/link-button]
[sol title=”ZELLA Live In High Waist Leggings” subheader=”Size XS”]
The name says it all! Trust me when I say you can live in these ZELLA Live In High Waist Leggings. The thick, brushed material is as cozy as it gets, making them a dream for everyday wear, long travel days, and even grooving through my 25-hour yoga workshop weekends. These leggings were particularly wonderful for the late-spring chill and rain Mother Nature decided to surprise Midwesterners with this year.
Pros
I kept my driver’s license, debit card, and car keys handy—without needing to lug around a purse—thanks to the hidden pocket cleverly placed in the waistband of these Live In High Waist Leggings.
The leggings hit at the ankles, making them appropriate for my favorite sneaks and best pair of combat boots. The seams were faint, with one wonderful surprise that all of the other pairs in this cohort lacked: piping over the glutes! Hello, shaping.
And can we talk affordability? You’ll be just as shocked as I was: For how comfortable and functional these leggings are, a $54 price tag is nothing short of incredible.
Cons
The brushed material these everyday leggings are made of was fairly prone to clinging. An impromptu snuggle sesh with my pup required thorough lint rolling before strutting out in public again. If you have any long-haired, light-colored furry friends running around at home, be warned.
Reminds me of: A portable hug—whether you’re in a plane, a train, an automobile … or yoga teacher training
[link-button href=”http://shopstyle.it/l/ImD3″] Get them from Nordstrom [/link-button]
[sol title=”Beyond Yoga High Waist Leggings” subheader=”Size XS”]
The Beyond Yoga High Waist Leggings are a welcome alternative to the jeans sitting in my dresser drawers. No zippers and no nagging waistlines digging into your obliques! That said, when compared to other pairs of leggings, these fell short.
Similar to the Old Navy High Rise Compression Leggings, these bottoms only offer two-way stretch, which means they’re significantly limited in terms of overall flexibility and functionality.
Pros
The fabric used for these leggings is fairly thin, and the overall style is very simplified. There aren’t any bells and whistles to distract from a perfectly executed casual or athletic outfit. Instead, I was able to pair these everyday leggings with whatever my heart desired.
Cons
Without any technical features for moisture-wicking or quick-drying, the sweat (even minimal amounts) that accumulated throughout the day just … sat. I experienced a lingering clingy feeling after spontaneously hopping into an afternoon power yoga class. From yoga to a night out with the girls? Probably not.
The Beyond Yoga High Waist Leggings are also prone to clinging, pilling, and fading. All factors considered, this pair isn’t worth the price tag.
Reminds me of: The Old Navy High Rise Compression Leggings
[link-button href=”https://amzn.to/2LdPwfX”] Get them from Amazon [/link-button]
[sol title=”Athleta Meshblock Pocket Salutation Tight” subheader=”Size XS”]
If you take the lululemon Align Pant and sprinkle it with super cute aesthetics, you get the Athleta Meshblock Pocket Salutation Tight. Merging heavenly soft material with side pockets and mesh cutouts for both functionality and style, these leggings are the ultimate game changer. Not only was I able to comfortably move through my daily schedule in these everyday leggings—I also looked gooood.
The waistband was one of the most comfortable, tying with the Align Pant. These had a similar fit down the leg, hugging tightly around the bottom of my shins. I happily noticed no bunching fabric behind my knees or around my ankles. If you ask me, this in itself is a major win. Great for a spin bike and for gladiator sandals.
Pros
The matte black material lacked any hint of sheerness. It passed my goddess-warrior squat test and remained opaque throughout my wildest stretching. These leggings weren’t shiny in the least. After the most zenned out yoga flow, I threw on platform Vans and a boxy striped crop to balance the femininity of the cutouts, then grabbed a casual dinner with my beau in the city. Thanks to the breathability featured in these leggings, I didn’t have a single worry about lingering moisture.
Despite what you may think would come with the territory of the luxurious softness of these leggings, the Athleta Meshblock Pocket Salutation Tight was essentially anti-clinging and anti-pilling. And no pup hair, despite our best cuddles.
No compression and all of the stretch? Exactly what we want for a long day of wear and travel days.
Cons
They may be stolen by my best friend when I’m not looking.
Reminds me of: The lululemon Align Pant
[link-button href=”http://fave.co/2D7oUcE”] Get them from Athleta [/link-button]
[related article_ids=26396]
Growing up, I wouldn’t have described myself as strong. My favorite food was sugar, I was naturally thin, and I had virtually no muscle mass. I spent my free time mostly sitting indoors, reading, on the computer, or watching TV.
When, one year, I tried out for my high school’s competitive dance team and made it, my body was not prepared. I vomited after my first line drill. My movements were never sharp enough or large enough. For my efforts I earned a hairline fracture in my tailbone, probably from too many high kicks thrown up without proper form.
The older I get, the more I care about becoming sturdier. I want to take up space confidently. I want as best I can to avoid the osteoporosis that has shrunk so many women in my family. I want to see what my body can do when it’s actually fed and trained to support the movements I make. And I would never be mad at #bootygainz.
Enter powerlifting—a sport that more and more women are turning to for the same kind of help. If you’re interested in making gains in both mind and body, take note of the three Ps of powerlifting: power, program, and protein.
Power
Powerlifting, often associated with testosterone and a bygone era, is having its other cultural moment. Women now make up one-third of the United States’ competitive lifters, and the number of female competitors doubled between 2014 and 2016, with the largest increase taking place between 2015 and 2016. The shift feels intuitive—increasingly, women are breaking down barriers to areas they’ve been shut out of. Gone are the days of three-pound weights. Now we’re awake. And we want to get swole.
Leah Prinzivalli, covering the inclusive, activist-minded Women’s Strength Coalition in New York City, wrote, “Imagine a 1980s ideal of a meathead, then add empathy and send her to therapy, and you’ll have a pretty good sense of the WSC lifters’ vibe.” This observation would likely hold up while scrolling through the female-lifter influencers of Instagram. Story after story reflects the same narrative of heavy lifting as healing from so many deprivations: of love, of food, of power.
Evidence supports the notion that taking on sports can have a spillover effect into other areas of life. Research from EY and espnW, for example, has shown a positive correlation between women who play sports and women who excel as business leaders.
Program
Powerlifting is a strength sport that focuses on three main lifts: the bench press, squat, and deadlift. (It’s distinct from weightlifting—also known as Olympic lifting, which comprises the snatch and the clean and jerk—and bodybuilding, which involves lifting heavy weights as well, but is more concerned with aesthetics than strength.) Competitive powerlifters have three attempts at each lift, with their heaviest lifts from each category averaged to create their overall scores.
Of course, you don’t have to compete to reap incredible benefits from powerlifting, such as improved glucose tolerance and heart health, lower risk of injury or loss of function over time due to reduced muscle mass, and increased confidence and strength.
While there are plenty of online resources to help educate you on the basics of powerlifting, dietitian and certified strength and conditioning specialist (CSCS) Matthew Stranberg recommends finding an experienced coach. Stranberg is also an exercise science advisor for an outpatient eating disorder treatment program for competitive athletes.
“It takes thousands upon thousands of repetitions to undo something that you’ve learned over time, so doing it right the first time makes the process a lot better,” Stranberg tells HealthyWay. “That doesn’t mean you have to have a coach throughout, but getting an assessment—just like if you went to the doctor to get a baseline reading, or you would go to a tutor to help learn a different language as opposed to just kind of showing up and using Google translator—that can make a world of difference.”
Protein
Are you using powerlifting to supplement your performance in another activity? Are you pursuing maximum strength? Is looking “bulky” a concern? (As CSCS and Girls Gone Strong co-founder and owner Molly Galbraith illustrated at length, “bulky” is a very misunderstood term.) Your goals will affect what you eat to fuel your body throughout training.
One thing’s for sure: You’ll probably want to consume significantly more protein.
“To increase muscle mass in combination with physical activity, it is recommended that a person that lifts weights regularly or is training for a running or cycling event eats a range of 1.2 to 1.7 grams of protein per kilogram of body weight per day, or 0.5 to 0.8 grams per pound of body weight,” advises the American College of Sports Medicine.
So, as a 5’2” (and a half!) 130-pound woman who is looking to gain strength and muscle mass while losing some fat (but not necessarily weight or size), I would want to consume between 65 and 104 grams of protein daily and the right caloric profile for my goals. That much protein, for example, might look like 1 to 2 scoops of protein powder in a smoothie with breakfast, 1 cup of Greek yogurt with lunch, and 2 single chicken breasts (or 2 cups of tofu) with dinner.
As always, be aware that no diet or exercise regimen is a magic pill. “Oftentimes people use these as a maladaptive coping skill, and although exercise can be helpful, and although trying to eat in a way that nourishes your body can be helpful, if that is your way of coping with stress, or uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, and emotions—that’s a lot of times where disorder can take place,” cautions Stranberg, who recommends engaging a dietitian and therapist along with a coach if you’re dealing with these issues.
Last week, at my first training session, my coach asked me to think of the reasons I decided to take up powerlifting. He said to remember them because they would come in handy as the challenges grew.
Maybe this strength sport is appealing to you because you’re sick of not being able to lift your suitcase or your kid without getting winded. Maybe you want to stay sharp at work. Maybe you just want some control in a country that seems fixated on stripping you of basic bodily autonomy.
Powerlifting can’t solve everything. But all of these are fine reasons to take hold of the bar and push like hell.
I grew up knowing that meditation was good for me. Our high school guidance counselors frequently suggested meditation to us as a stress-management technique. Experts on The Oprah Winfrey Show recommended meditation. Multiple media outlets frequently reported on the benefits of meditation.
Like many people, I had the knowledge that meditation is good for you—but I still didn’t do it.
Why? Mostly I believed I lacked the time. Not to mention that I simply got bored if I had to sit still for longer than 10 minutes.
I know I’m not alone. Many people agree that meditation is good in theory, but they struggle to practice it. In Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics, author Dan Harris provides a pretty bold solution. He asserts that one minute of meditation (nearly) every day can be beneficial.
I know what you’re thinking: One minute? How can anything positive come out of only one minute of meditation a day?
One minute of meditation is just a stepping stone. It’s an excellent start for those who struggle to get into meditation—or those who are skeptical of the practice in general. Here’s why.
1) It makes you aware of the buzz within your own mind.
If you’ve ever tried meditation, you probably realized that it’s really hard to soothe your brain: Your thoughts are constantly buzzing around in your mind. Truthfully, though, this is a good thing.
This awareness of your own thoughts is beneficial in itself, Harris said in an interview with NPR. He notes that beginner meditators realize that their minds are constantly busy, which is an important realization in itself. Once we begin to notice how busy our brains are, we have a better understanding of our thoughts.
Take, for example, my own experiences with meditation. I often have mean or judgmental thoughts, like everyone else. For example, I might judge a person by their appearance or I might have body-negative thoughts even though I don’t put much stock into looks.
I might not believe these things, but I still think them. My gut tells me to be ashamed of these thoughts and hide them instead of unpacking them.
When I became aware of how many thoughts flow through my mind, I realized that the loudest thoughts aren’t necessarily ones that need to define my actions or my attitude. I’ve learned to examine the thoughts I have and process them instead of letting them rule my actions.
One minute doesn’t seem like enough to clear your thoughts, but that’s not what you’re aiming to do. An awareness of that “buzz” in your mind is super beneficial in itself, and it can be achieved in just one minute.
2) It helps you form a habit.
Forming a habit is extremely hard but extremely rewarding.
One of the many tricks when it comes to forming a habit is routine. The key is consistency, not quantity. Doing something everyday-ish, as Harris says, means you’ll be able to form the habit and become acquainted with doing it often.
Ten minutes a day can be pretty hard to set aside, but I think we all have at least one minute where we’d otherwise be scrolling through social media. It’s easier to commit to one minute a day, which means this habit will be easier to stick to.
3) You’ll likely increase the time you spend meditating.
Once you’ve formed that habit, it will be easier to increase the time you spend meditating.
Scientific studies have suggested that meditation improves one’s emotional wellness. Gratitude meditation has been linked to better mental health and emotional regulation, and other studies have shown that meditation can improve your ability to cope with stressful circumstances. Even better, experts have suggested that the optimal amount of time for meditation each day is five to 10 minutes.
Spending 10 minutes a day meditating is a hard sell if you’re unsure if it works. One minute, on the other hand, isn’t much to lose. Once you try it for a minute each day, you’ll see the benefits. Meditating will sell itself.
Once you’re into it, it’s easier to think, Hey! I can do this for a few more minutes. Soon you’ll build up to a longer amount of time. More minutes spent meditating equals more benefits for you!
How to Start Meditating
Yes, 60 seconds of meditating per day can be super useful—but if you’ve never done it, you might be wondering where to start.
First, remember to keep your expectations low. You won’t be able to “calm your mind” immediately, nor will you be able to clear your thoughts. Let them buzz. Notice them. Try not to get wrapped up in them; instead, watch them float by like you’re watching a movie.
Second, being comfortable is important. You probably don’t need a meditation cushion as you’re only still for a minute, but you should sit in a comfortable space free from distractions.
Try to focus on something still, like a simple object in front of you or a wall. You can also focus on your own breathing. For beginners, focusing on something tangible is a fantastic way to get into meditation.
Still struggling? Try a guided meditation or download a meditation app like Headspace.
Remember that you don’t need to be a mindfulness master to get meditation to work for you. Even if you feel like you’re not doing it “right,” it can still benefit you—one minute at a time.
I’ve got a case of wanderlust, and a serious one at that. My dream lifestyle involves bouncing from one country to the next, with all the essentials right on my back. And while I haven’t gone full digital nomad…yet…I do travel a lot—more frequently than I can find a companion to come with me.
So what’s a wanderer to do? She hits the road on her own.
Getting the confidence to travel solo, though, is a trek in and of itself. The first day of my first solo trip in 2010 involved holing myself up in a hotel room. I had left the familiarity of New Delhi, where I studied Hindi and Indian art with 20 other American college kids, to conduct field research on local cuisine around India. An overnight train ride dropped me (and my unmanageably large backpack) off 900-ish miles south in Ahmedabad, and it hit me: I was alone. I felt vulnerable and intimidated, so when I arrived at the hotel, I struggled to leave. I felt like a failure.
But time was ticking and I needed to begin my research, stat. It took hours of giving myself an internal pep talk and making expensive long-distance calls to friends back home to finally work up the courage to leave my hotel room. But I did it, and it turned out to be one of the most rewarding experiences of my life, inspiring countless future trips around the world with no one’s hand to hold but my own.
Hopping on a plane to somewhere you’ve never been, where you don’t speak the language, and you have little idea where to go or what to do…it sounds ludicrous, I know. But there’s something deeply invigorating about getting up in the morning and having the entire day to explore the world alone. You have no one to answer to but yourself.
Trust me, you can do it. Any woman with a bit of grit and a lot of curiosity can (and should) take at least one solo trip.
When it comes time for yours, I’ve got some tips that can make your adventure easier and (hopefully) more fun.
Spin the globe.
The destination you choose will set the tone for your journey. If it’s your first time traveling solo, look for a place that has a strong tourism infrastructure: lots of hotels, restaurants, and things to do. That will make it easy for you to meet other people and enjoy the experience with minimal hassle.
Just as important is safety, especially when you’re a woman traveling alone. The U.S. Department of State publishes official travel advisories that can warn you about potential dangers in different parts of the world. TripAdvisor and travel forums can give you recent travelers’ perspectives of a place. The Lonely Planet destination guidebooks (a must-have on every trip I take) also offer traveler-specific guidance on dangers and annoyances you might experience on your trip.
Having never been the victim of a crime abroad, I genuinely believe many places in the world are safe and welcoming. Do your homework before you hop on the plane, leave your valuables at home, and remain assertive and confident no matter what the trip throws your way.
Dress the part.
What you wear plays a big role in how you experience foreign destinations. It’s a reality I don’t love, but it’s been my experience nonetheless.
I feel more comfortable when I cover up with cotton garments on my trips—often knee-length skirts (or longer), T-shirts, and jackets and scarves. However, if locals are wearing shorts and tank tops, I consider that a cue that it’s fine for me to do so too. Uniqlo and Zara have become my go-to stores for updating my travel wardrobe.
Dressing like a local is another way to show respect for host country and blend in. Visit a local mall or market early in your trip and see what clothes catch your eye.
Shop Travel Essentials:
Getting Around
Getting around in a foreign country is equal parts confusing, frustrating, fascinating, and fun. I recommend taking a private cab (or arranging a pickup from your hotel) when you go to a new country alone. It’ll help you get your bearings after a long flight.
But try using public transportation throughout the rest of your trip. Riding the subways or hopping on buses saves you money and immerses you in the culture, showing you what it’s actually like to live in a different place.
Some of my most vivid memories from my time in Jakarta, Indonesia, involve bumpy rides around the metropolis backed by the music of buskers on the crowded Kopaja buses, and it was a lot more colorful than sitting alone in a taxi.
You do you.
There’s nothing like the feeling of freedom you get when traveling solo. Feeling ambitious and want to take on a five-mile hike followed by an afternoon of museum hopping? Go for it! Has the trip worn you out and you need a break? Sip coffee and pore over a novel at a cafe all day—no judgment.
No matter how you choose to spend your days, you’ll learn about yourself, what you find fulfilling, and what it takes to live authentically—all skills that will continue enrich your life back home.
You can also consider diving deep into something that intrigues you. If you’re completely obsessed with the local cuisine, fill your itinerary with foodie activities and restaurant reservations. A cooking class, a stroll through a food market, and dinner at the place all the locals love are all musts. Immersing yourself in an area of interest will give your trip a greater sense of purpose.
Oh, the People You Meet!
It’s a fact: When you take a solo trip, you’re going to get lonely. But here’s another fact: You’re going to meet people.
Eager for some companionship after spending a few days alone, I made conversation with a woman playing solitaire in the hotel room of my guesthouse in Amritsar. She was friendly, and we decided we’d go see the festive border ceremony between India and Pakistan, a day trip I was nervous about taking on my own. There, we danced to Bollywood music with Indian women in the streets as tens of thousands of people showed pride for their countries, waving flags and chanting.
It was electrifying to share this experience with someone I’d only just met. Friends are surprisingly easy to come by when you’re traveling.
Take the plunge and book a flight to that place you’ve always dreamed of visiting. And take it from me: Leaving your hotel room will be the biggest challenge of your first trip alone.
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After struggling for years to face the woman she saw staring back at her in the mirror, Nadia Murdock decided once and for all that she would change her body (and her mind) for the better. Nadia became her own very first personal training client—and through hard work, the right mindset, and a little help from her loving support system, she was able to unlock the true potential that had been inside of her all along.
Although the road wasn’t always easy, Nadia has since become an author and fitness coach. If you’ve ever struggled with your outward appearance or feeling unsatisfied with your overall health and happiness, Nadia’s personal transformation journey is definitely worth your consideration.
How It Began
Your story is so inspiring. Can you tell me a bit about your personal fitness journey and how it all began?
I was fairly healthy before leaving home for college, largely because I rarely had access to bad foods in our home. It wasn’t until my freshman year of college when I had junk food at my fingertips—not to mention the excessive late nights and college parties—that it really started to add up.
I was unhappy with the college I had chosen, so I would pretty much eat all the time and watch movies. After transferring I would work out here and there but was not active enough to truly see a difference. My eating habits slightly improved but remained unhealthy overall. It wasn’t until my senior year of college (I explain this in detail in my book You Can Have It All) that I got serious about my food choices and exercise and started to train my mind so I could change my body!
When did you realize that you wanted to change your life? Was there a specific moment that lit your fire?
My fourth year of college allowed me to re-evaluate what I was eating and how I needed to clean up my lifestyle. My brother gifted me a gym membership and that was such a pivotal change in my life.
How did you turn these thoughts into actions initially?
I kept my own version of a fitness journal where I recorded motivational quotes, recipes, after photos to remind me of how far I have traveled in my fitness journey … and I really put myself out there taking every group fitness class imaginable.
What was the hardest part of your personal transformation?
Realizing these things take time and there is no quick fix! Because of that experience, it’s the number one lesson I share with my clients and students. Also, learning to stop comparing myself to others. Nothing is wrong with a little healthy competition—actually it’s a great motivator!—however it took some time for me to realize just because I am not size 2 doesn’t mean I am not healthy and fit!
Was there ever a time when you felt like giving up and returning to your old lifestyle?
Definitely! It was a few years after grad school and I landed my first full-time job. Over the years I became very unhappy in that position and as a result my old habits started to creep back in (similar to my college experience). Although I was still going to the gym, my physique reflected otherwise! I still remember looking at a photo thinking something had to change! I landed a gig as a fitness contributor for a blog and that really helped put me back on track. I started trying new classes, meeting new people, and surrounding myself with the right energy.
Barre
Why did you decide to become a fitness coach?
More and more people started asking me for fitness advice both through my column and at the gym. I had dinner with a friend visiting from out of town and explained my working situation and my love for fitness. She encouraged me and convinced me I could live my dream and I needed to pursue my passion in health and wellness. So I looked into certifications and went for it!
How did you initially discover barre?
I was mainly teaching Zumba classes and I was looking for a way to diversify my teachings. I had taken a few barre classes on my own as a student and really loved the variety of the workout. As a fitness writer I had come in contact with several barre professionals and actually pursed my certification through Beyond Barre, who I had interviewed in the past.
I gravitated to the concentration on form and the variety that the certification offered. It was an excellent stepping stone for me to create my own classes. Since then I have received continuing ed certifications with Barre Variations and BarreAmped BOUNCE.
What keeps you coming back to barre?
I was originally drawn to barre as a way to add variety to my teachings. It then became the perfect option for me while I was pregnant with my son. Not only was barre perfect during my pregnancy, but post pregnancy too. Barre can be taught in so many different ways and styles; no workout is the same!
What do you enjoy most about being a fitness coach?
Hearing about everyone’s transformation. Whether it’s how much stronger they feel or how clothes fit them better, knowing that I helped to make a difference in someone’s life means a lot!
What other types of physical exercise do you enjoy outside of barre?
I make it a point to still find time for my own personal workouts outside of barre, which include spin, BODYPUMP weight lifting classes, Zumba, and BODYATTACK, which is like kickboxing.
Motherhood and Words of Wisdom
What is your personal training philosophy?
I really like to keep my relationships personable; it truly resonates with my personality. I also make it a point to customize my programs. There is no cookie cutter approach at Nadia Murdock Fit! My mind and body program digs deep to discover what obstacles and mental roadblocks are preventing each individual from achieving their goals. It worked for me and I created it to help others, hence my tagline: #trainyourmindchangeyourbody.
What words of wisdom or encouragement do you have for other women who are starting their health and wellness journey?
Don’t give up, don’t get discouraged, try to remain positive no matter what! A lot of people may not be supportive during your transformation. Do not allow that energy to derail you from your goals.
How do you balance motherhood with your career, training schedule, client needs, et cetera?
Oh—this is a big one! I am still figuring this out but it definitely takes a team to make it achievable. My husband and mother have been very supportive, and we all work together to make it happen! I think making any kind of time for myself is so vital and makes me a better mom.
What is your advice for fellow mothers who want to change their lives—especially when it comes to their experience of health and wellness—but who may feel discouraged due to time constraints or feelings of guilt about taking time for self-care?
Again, I’m still figuring this out! I think a lot of things as a mom—especially a first-time mom—are ongoing learning experiences. I do feel it’s not only important for moms but great for children to witness self-care! They are truly sponges and if they learn this important lifestyle lesson firsthand, they are more likely to make it part of their own lives.
One of your qualities that I’m always drawn to is your positivity and sincerity. How do you stay so positive and emotionally intelligent?
That is a really sweet thing to say, thank you! I think kindness goes a long way, and I feel good when I can make someone smile or improve their day in some way. I went through a period in my life when I wasn’t always so positive. Looking back on it now, that was a result of unhappiness in either my career or health journey.
Positivity is now a part of me for many reasons—most of all gratitude. When you can be thankful for what you have it’s really easy to be positive. I also think weeding out negative energy is a must in order to be the most positive version of yourself.
I see on your website that you’ve recently launched the NMFit Mind & Body Podcast. Could you give our readers a sense of what they can expect from your podcast?
Yes! The NMFIT Mind & Body podcast launched back in March. My goal was to bring some of my online interviews into an audible version. I focus on different topics with my interviewees, ranging from reiki to female entrepreneurship. I also include my own personal chats because I wanted to offer another opportunity for my audience to get to know me on a personable level. Have a listen! It’s like chatting with your girlfriends—perfect to listen to during your next run or commute to work.
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About 10 years ago, lactation expert and blogger Leigh Anne O’Connor had a pearly looking, slightly raised area on her chest. Concerned, she asked a client of hers—who happened to be a dermatologist—what she thought about it.
“She thought it was suspicious and suggested I see my dermatologist,” O’Connor says. It turned out that the raised area was squamous cell carcinoma, a cancer that occurs in one of the upper layers of the epidermis, so she had it removed.
Since then, O’Connor has had other cancers removed. She’s had surgery to remove a cancer on her face, and she’s currently waiting for the results of a biopsy on her nose.
“I was glad to know that I picked up on something I knew was not right. I was not surprised, as my parents and my older brother have all had skin cancers removed,” she says.
According to the American Cancer Society, skin cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer in the United States. An estimated 5.4 million cases of non-melanoma skin cancer were diagnosed among 3.3 million people in 2012 alone. Research also indicates that most of these cases can be prevented by avoiding excessive exposure to the sun.
With summer just around the corner, it’s imperative that we all learn about detecting and preventing skin cancer so that we can keep ourselves and our loved ones safe.
What are the different types of skin cancer?
According to the National Cancer Institute, the three most common kinds of skin cancer are squamous cell carcinoma, basal cell carcinoma, and melanoma.
The epidermis is the outermost layer of skin and consists of many layers of cells. Squamous cells are closer to the skin’s surface, followed by the basal cells. In the deepest part of the epidermis are melanocytes, cells that make melanin, which is responsible for the pigments of our skin. Cancer can occur in any three of these skin cells.
The most common kinds of skin cancer are squamous cell carcinoma and basal cell carcinoma. These forms of skin cancer are also called non-melanoma cancers. Melanoma spreads faster than squamous or basal cell carcinoma. Because the melanocytes are deeper, melanoma can easily spread to other tissues and cause cancer in other parts of the body.
Another form of skin cancer is Merkel cell carcinoma, which is a rare, fast-spreading, aggressive form of skin cancer. Merkel cell carcinoma is often linked to immune suppression and to excessive exposure to ultraviolet (UV) light; it occurs more frequently in people with conditions like HIV or leukemia and people over age 50 or who have had organ transplants.
What are the early signs of skin cancer?
The most obvious sign of skin cancer is a strange-looking spot or mole on your skin. “If you find something suspicious on your skin—growing, bleeding, not healing, tender, scabbed, or crusted—see a dermatologist right away. If you have skin cancer, the best thing to do is to diagnose and treat it as early as possible,” says Caroline A. Chang, MD, FAAD, clinical assistant professor of dermatology at Alpert Medical School of Brown University.
Frequently checking your own skin for strange marks is a great way to detect skin cancer at an early stage. But how can you perform a self-check? We spoke to Keira Barr, MD, a dual board-certified dermatologist, founder of the Resilient Health Institute, and author of The Skin Whisperer.
Although you’re most likely to get skin cancer on the places that are frequently exposed to the sun, like your face, neck, arms, and trunk, you should still check absolutely everywhere—even in your private areas, says Barr.
“My best advice is to get naked!” she says. “The only way to examine your skin is to see it. All of it. Don’t be modest; have fun with it.”
She suggests checking your skin once a month from top to toe. “Look in all your nooks and crannies: mouth, armpits, belly button, nails, and between your fingers, toes and bottoms of your feet. Recruit help for places you can’t easily see like your scalp, eyelids, and oral cavity. Ask a trusted friend, hairdresser, doctor, or dentist,” she says.
Not sure what to look out for? Barr recommends using the “ABCDE” method for assessing spots, moles, and sores:
A is for asymmetry.
Harmless spots are typically symmetrical. If one half of your spot doesn’t match the other half, this could be a red flag.
B is for border.
“You are looking for spots that have a poorly defined border,” says Barr. If your spot has a jagged, blurry, or irregular border, make a note of it and show a dermatologist.
C is for color.
If the color of the spot isn’t the same all over, it should be seen by a dermatologist.
D is for diameter.
If a spot is larger than 5 mm in diameter, it might be cause for concern. Barr says this is a soft call, however. “If your spot meets any of the above criteria, ignore the size and get it checked out,” she advises.
E is for evolving.
If a spot changes over time, get it checked out. “This logic also applies for sores that aren’t healing in a time frame typical for your body and/or a sore or red, scaly spot that recurs in the same spot time and time again,” Barr adds.
Of course, if your spot fits any of the above criteria, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s skin cancer, but it’s still crucial that you see a dermatologist. If you find something strange, O’Connor encourages you to seek help as soon as possible. “Do not be afraid. A small area cut off early will likely not scar much if at all. The longer you wait the larger the cancer can grow,” she says.
Fortunately, skin cancer can be treated effectively.
What are the treatment options for skin cancer?
“There are many options for skin cancer, including surgical and non-surgical options,” says Barry Goldman, MD, a dermatologist and a clinical instructor at Cornell NY Presbyterian Hospital. “Most skin cancers are typically removed under local anesthesia in the doctor’s office,” Goldman says.
An example of this is Mohs surgery, which O’Connor had on a facial cancer. This procedure is commonly used to remove non-melanoma skin cancers, and it typically scars very little. Mohs surgery is often used for cancers on the face or for cancers that are large, rapidly growing, or recurring. Although doctors have seen promising results using Mohs surgery for some melanomas, depending on the nature (size, depth, etc.) of the melanoma, more extensive surgery is often necessary.
When it comes to small skin cancers, Goldman says that certain topical creams can be prescribed to halt the carcinoma. This could include topical chemotherapy. Other potential treatment options include photodynamic therapy, which uses lasers; cryotherapy, which uses liquid nitrogen to freeze off the cancer; and electrodessication and curettage, in which the cancer is physically removed using special equipment.
“Radiation therapy is another option, particularly for an elderly patient who may have a hard time with surgery,” Goldman adds.
The course of treatment will be decided by your dermatologist, who will take into consideration your general health, the type of cancer you have, the size of the cancer, and whether it has spread.
Most of the time, a basal or squamous cell skin cancer won’t come back after it’s been removed, but a small percentage of people with skin cancer have recurring cancers. This is why people who have had skin cancer are advised to frequently check their skin, visit their dermatologist for regular exams, and avoid excessive exposure to the sun.
Other than experiencing the physical, tangible symptoms of skin cancer, a skin cancer survivor and their loved ones might also experience psychological distress. This is totally normal, and it’s advisable to attend skin cancer support groups or speak to a therapist to help you through this stressful time. Online forums and cancer support hotlines could be another avenue for finding support.
How can skin cancer be prevented?
We know that limiting your time in the sun is imperative when it comes to skin cancer prevention, but what else can you do to keep yourselves and your loved ones from getting skin cancer?
To reduce your risk, you want to minimize your exposure to UV rays. Primarily found in sunlight, UV rays can damage your skin cells’ DNA directly. This can cause sunburn as well as skin cancer.
Research tells us that UV rays are stronger between 10 a.m. and 4 p.m., during spring and summer, and when you’re situated closer to the equator. If you’ve had skin cancer before, or if you have a family history of skin cancer, it’s even more important to protect yourself from the sun because those are risk factors.
If you have to be in the sun, wear sunscreen, try to stay in a shady spot, and wear protective clothing and sunglasses. Chang suggests reapplying sunscreen every one to two hours. Although sunscreen can’t block out all of the UV rays, it can filter it. Chang also suggests wearing sun-protective clothing, which usually has a built-in UPF (UV protection factor) of 50.
Since children tend to spend more time outdoors, especially during the summer, it’s essential that you teach the little ones in your life about protecting themselves from the sun. When they’re very young, try to limit their time in the sun. And when they are outdoors, apply sunscreen regularly—especially if they are swimming or sweating. As they grow older, remind them to apply sunscreen themselves, wear protective clothing, and reduce their sun exposure during peak hours.
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Although fair-skinned people are more likely to get skin cancer, anybody can get it. The American Cancer Society points out that the pigment melanin, which helps protect the skin from UV rays, is also involved in the tanning process. When you suntan, it’s melanin that turns your skin darker. So people with more melanin will have darker skin, and they’ll be better protected from UV rays.
But Chang says that this doesn’t mean that people with dark skin or people who tan easily are immune from getting skin cancer. It’s imperative that everyone uses caution when exposed to the sun’s UV rays.
When it comes to vitamin D, a little sun every so often is enough to give your body the vitamin D it needs, says Goldman: “20 minutes of sun on your arms is typically all a person needs to get vitamin D production going. As a dermatologist, I would rather get a little every day than compress sun exposure into multiple hours in one day. A lot of dermatologists feel that a few bad sunburns is a bigger risk factor for melanoma than mild chronic exposure,” he explains.
It can also be helpful to take topical and/or oral antioxidants such as vitamin C–enriched lotion or the oral supplement Heliocare, Chang says. “The effects of UV light have been shown to continue to damage your DNA even hours after sun exposure, so using an antioxidant lotion or taking antioxidant pills can be helpful in blocking the UV damage,” she notes.
Goldman personally does not recommend dietary changes to prevent skin cancer, although some dermatologists do. “With regards to dietary changes, the available medical studies tend to be small and conflicting,” he says.
“Since UV light causes skin cancer in part by oxidation, some dermatologists recommend a diet high in vitamins C, E, and A; zinc; selenium; beta carotene (carotenoids); omega-3 fatty acids; lycopene; and polyphenols. However, when taken in isolation, these antioxidants have not been shown to prevent skin cancer, and high doses can be toxic,” Goldman explains.
Chang says that it’s also important to avoid tanning beds. The American Cancer Society points out that tanning beds and tanning lamps give off large amounts of potentially cancer-causing UV rays.
Although skin cancer is serious, most forms are easy to treat, especially if they’re detected early. While you’re soaking up the sun this summer, be sure to protect yourself from harmful UV rays and keep an eye on your skin for potentially worrying spots.
Desperation drove me to do it. “Looking for someone to chill with,” I wrote on the San Francisco Craigslist personals forum.
“I recently moved here from NY to pursue a career in journalism. It’s tough meeting new friends in a new city, especially after college,” my post continued. “I’d love to get a drink and a snack with a cool guy or girl tonight. Let me know if you’re interested.”
I read it over, and felt compelled to add one last line: “Friends only, thanks.” This was Craigslist, after all.
Having relocated to the opposite coast, fresh out of college at age 22, I suddenly found myself without any local friends. I felt pathetic publishing the post, but once the responses started rolling in, I realized I wasn’t alone in feeling lonely. There were actually a lot of us.
The demands of adulthood—from pursuing a career, to growing our families, to finding love—can cause our friendships to take a back seat (and possibly evaporate altogether). Before you know it, you look around and realize you have no one to hang out with. And at this stage in life, it’s hard to even figure out how to make friends, let alone find people with whom you’re compatible.
A response popped in my inbox from another woman about my age. We decided to have a friend date at a local restaurant. While it was every bit as awkward as a typical first date, the experience also brought me a flood of relief: Finally, someone (anyone!) to connect with! We ended up hanging out regularly during my stint in the city by the bay.
Putting yourself out there feels awkward—the fear of rejection can cause even the most extroverted people to crawl into their shells. But friendships play a critical role in our health and happiness. According to a 2016 study, researchers found that people with “a higher degree of social connectedness” had better physiological function and lower risks of certain disorders.
Equally important, our friends act as foundations of support when times get tough, cheerleaders when we’re chasing our dreams, and celebrants for our achievements, large and small.
“It’s important for women to feel connected to their friends and to have that support, especially as we go through life’s ups and downs,” says Nicole Zangara, licensed clinical social worker and author of Surviving Female Friendships: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.
Making friends isn’t easy, but you don’t have to publish an awkward post on a sketchy forum to start meeting people. Real women from around the country (and the globe!) shared their top tips on finding new friends—and keeping them. Here’s how you can push through loneliness and open yourself up to friendship at any stage of life.
An Expert’s Take on How to Make Friends
When you’re feeling lonely, it’s all too easy to wallow in it and avoid trying to make friends. Why should you bother? Does friendship even matter?
Having friends absolutely matters, says Zangara. In fact, friendships fulfill more than just a social need—they also influence our health. Research shows that the presence of a “best friend” reduces the levels of the stress hormone cortisol in a person’s body. An active social life can reduce the rates of cognitive decline in old age by up to 70 percent, according to another study. Researchers say that our friends also help us adopt healthier habits, like working out and eating nutritious meals.
“If a friend is trying to get into shape, it can impact the other friends in the group to also get more active,” explains Zangara. “If someone tries to quit smoking, she might become a positive influence on her other friends to do the same. Feeling supported provides happiness and overall greater life satisfaction.”
If those aren’t enough reasons to start figuring out how to make friends, get this: A meta-analysis of 148 studies found that people with stronger social relationships had a 50 percent higher likelihood of survival. Talk about the power of friends!
Opening Yourself Up to New Friends
Making friends as children was breezy for most people. Just sharing a favorite color could be enough for two girls to become besties.
But when we grow up, things swing the opposite direction. It’s like we forget how to make friends once we graduate. What’s the deal?
“When we’re young, we have many opportunities to meet other people in our classes, at our extracurricular activities, on our sports teams, and in clubs,” says Zangara. “It gets harder as an adult because you have to intentionally create the opportunity to meet people, and some of us don’t want to put forth the effort, or even know how.”
Realizing your need for genuinely intimate relationships with friends is a step in the right direction. But before you can approach others, you need to make sure that you’re approachable yourself.
“When making new friends, especially if you’re self-conscious, try to be open minded and ask others about themselves,” Zangara suggests. “Sometimes just a smile can make you seem much more approachable and friendly. Making good eye contact also helps, and you will seem confident.”
People are drawn to each other for different reasons, whether it’s an ambitious career, a shared interest in science fiction, or a quirky sense of humor. It’s natural, and while there’s no way to force it, giving off a confident, positive vibe will increase the likelihood that someone will be charmed by you.
Strategies for How to Make Friends
When you’re longing to find the Thelma to your Louise, you might be at a loss for where to go. But you’re not the first person to navigate the world of making new friends. We asked women from around the world about the strategies that helped them find their besties. While none of them suggested Craigslist, they did share the clever ideas that worked for them.
1. Sign up for sports.
Sherri Bourdo, a physical therapist in Fort Myers, Florida, found herself lonely when she relocated from Wisconsin. So she started looking for ways to keep busy and pursue her passions—and that’s when she found some local friends.
“Volleyball is one of my passions, so I checked into all the local clubs and recreational centers for teams that may need an additional player. Just my luck, a team needed one girl and I joined them for the season. They became (and still are) some of my closest friends,” she says. “The great thing with volleyball or any sport is that most people who play are usually into health, fitness, and staying active, which can help you continue connecting with other people and building more friendships.”
If traditional team sports aren’t your thing, try other ways of being active, like a Pilates class or group hiking. There’s something about the act of moving your body makes it easier to build connections with others.
2. Give someone a compliment.
Bars are a great place to meet friends, right? That’s what Samantha Allen, a legal assistant in Boston, believed when she was looking for new pals. It generally worked—but she did something extra at a local watering hall that made a big difference.
“A few months ago, I complimented a woman at a bar on how wonderfully she matched her red lipstick to the same red shade of her leather purse, and we’ve been good girlfriends ever since. We spent the rest of the night hanging out, and today when we go to dinner or out for walks, we always laugh that so few people meet new friends the way we did,” she says.
Noticing something unique about another person and actually speaking up about it can break the ice on a new relationship. Try complimenting one new person a day to see where it leads you.
3. Try something unexpected (like karaoke).
Whether it’s indoor rock climbing, singing in a choir, or taking a pottery-making class, a new activity can help you break out of your shell and meet friends from other walks of life. For Alexandra Palombo, a communications specialist in Washington, D.C., that activity was joining a competitive karaoke league (yes, that’s a thing).
“Part of its appeal is that you could potentially meet 47 other people that you didn’t know before on any given night,” she says.
It turns out that friends who sing together, stay together. Even though Palombo has since left the league, she credits the experience as the thing that helped her make “about 80 percent” of her local friends, including both her old roommate and her boyfriend of five years.
“I highly recommend that people who are new in town search out stuff like this and give it a try,” she says. “Worst case scenario: It’s no fun. The best case, though, is that you make a ton of new connections outside of your workplace.”
4. Connect through your kids (or your dog).
“Kids are your key and entryway to meeting friends,” says Alison Bernstein, founder of real estate strategy firm Suburban Jungle and mom of four children.
Each social or recreational activity your child has during the week creates an opportunity to strike up a conversation with another mom and hopefully hit things off as friends.
“Chat with other parents at birthday party drop-offs or sporting events,” Bernstein adds. “As your kids make friends, you’ll automatically have things in common with their parents as all your children will go through their ‘firsts’ together, from starting kindergarten, to gaining independence, and ultimately graduation. That common bond goes a long way.”
Don’t have kids? A dog can have a similar effect on helping you make friends, says Bernstein.
“Dogs are always a conversation starter,” she says. “Many towns have dog parks which are great places to socialize. You can meet so many people there and set up dog play dates.”
5. Go on a retreat.
Retreats are like summer camp for grown-ups—not only are they a chance to step outside the routine of everyday life, they’re also a catalyst for friendships to form and deepen, fast. That’s what Andrea Valeria, digital nomad and vlogger at It’s a Travel O.D., recently discovered during a multi-day retreat with nine other women in Playa del Carmen, Mexico.
“I’m constantly trying new travel-related experiences so I can meet more cool people,” she says. “Most recently, I went on an all-women’s entrepreneurial retreat by Vaera Journeys. Spending a week with women who like to hustle as much as I do turned out to be a great idea. I walked away inspired and with a few new friends.”
You don’t have to go too far from home to find a retreat, though. Look for a local retreat with a theme that interests you, whether that’s yoga, spirituality, getting back to nature, or anything else, so you can make friends who are as enthusiastic about something as you are.
6. Get digital.
As isolating as social media and the internet can be, online spaces can also be useful places for making connections—if you know where to look. Estrella Sansait, a Canadian expat living in Spain, says that online groups make it easier for introverts like her to find new friends.
“Opening up to new people has always been a bit of challenge for me. When I moved abroad, I forced myself out of my social comfort zone and was able to create connections with a handful of amazing people through Facebook groups and Meetup. Some of them are still in my life,” she says.
Jacquelyn Kyle, a travel blogger based in New Jersey, also had good luck making friends through digital platforms.
“I used BumbleBFF. It felt a bit shallow to swipe ‘no’ on potential friends, but it was remarkable to me how similar the process is to dating. I went on a few BumbleBFF ‘dates’ that were just as awkward as any romantic date, but before too long I met Alexa. We connected immediately, and each ended up sharing much more about our lives than we’d planned. She’s my best friend, and I’m so happy I met her,” says Kyle.
7. Connect with people in your field.
Your profession instantly gives you something in common with potential new friends, along with tons to talk about. Emily King, owner and creative director of Whiskey & White Events, says that she leveraged her career as a “solopreneur” to spur her social life.
“Not having any coworkers can be lonely. So I’ve intentionally reached out to other creative business owners in my city and industry and a small group of us meet once a month for what I call my Encouraging Friendship Group,” she says. “We talk about our businesses and provide each other with inspiration and support to follow our dreams, both personally and professionally. It’s been incredibly rewarding.”
Wondering how to make friends in your field? Try going to local networking events, joining professional associations, or even just inviting someone with an interesting background on LinkedIn out to coffee. You never know where it might lead.
The HealthyWay Friendship Challenge
Now that you know some ways to start making friends, it’s time to go out and try them. HealthyWay’s challenging you to put yourself out there and approach three potential friends in the next week. Go head, invite a colleague out for drinks, ask the cool girl in your spin class to go to brunch, or set up a much-needed mommy date. Let us know how it goes by hitting us up on Facebook, or snap a pic with your new friend and tag us on Instagram @itsthehealthyway.