Smoke floats in front of Wendy Lewis as she takes a machine gun and peppers her once pristine wedding dress. And so a new trend begins sweeping not only America but the entire world: divorce parties.
While engagement parties are a timeless event, divorce parties are even hotter. With divorce rates fluctuating between 40-50% it only makes sense that this would follow.
Why not grab your closest group of friends and celebrate your newest milestone…freedom!
Companies are cashing in on this relatively new idea. Packages range from low costs to those that are seemingly astronomical. For each bash, women and men’s needs are catered to specifically; everything that’s been previously restricted is fair game. Taking a wedding dress to the rifle range or going to a golfing range are just some of the many activities a divorce party planner can concoct for your trip. “Barely Survived” to “I Got It All,” are some of the cheekier titles to these weekend getaways.
Of course what’s the most important item for a party like this? A cake! A divorce cake is an absolute must and the plethora of designs are just as incredible as you imagined. The most common cake you may ask. Well, it typically shows a bride dragging a groom towards the trash…classy right?
Although divorce parties sound like all fun and games they’re actually credible reasons why this type of gathering may be the best thing for you. Therapist Christine Gallagher describes reasons why divorce parties are not only fun but are therapeutic as well.
Many divorces are wrought with sadness and anger so throwing a party is a great excuse to laugh again and just be crazy, specifically with those that love and will never abandon you. Their willingness to stick alongside you during this arduous process is a testament to their steadfast devotion that is missing in many romantic relationships.
It’s also highly uncomfortable when you have to reveal to acquaintances, whether it’s through social media or summer picnics that yes, in fact you are no longer married. This absolves all of the unknown that may be lurking. One of your girl friends or guy friends can just snap a shot of the festivities, upload it to Facebook, and voila, you’ve got it taken care of.
If a divorce party isn’t your style you could always go ahead and try a Divorce Hotel. In the Netherlands, a company is attempting to have couples celebrate their divorce – together. It’s meant to serve as a quick and amicable solution. Check-in is on Friday. You go through break-up counseling the entire weekend to resolve and finalize feelings. Come Sunday, you sign the divorce papers, toast one another with a glass of champagne, and then proceed on your merry way.
Some people go for a more subtle approach. Leona Metcalf went through a grueling divorce over the span of five years. Poking fun at the “Just Married” decorations many cars are adorned with she plastered “Just Divorced” onto the back of her truck. Cans clattered against the asphalt from the courthouse all the way to her home and she couldn’t be prouder. People were shouting ‘you go girl,’ and ‘what a cool idea’ leaving her feel empowered once more.
Although divorce parties sound like just an excuse to get drunk (which they are) they also serve a greater purpose – closing a chapter on one’s life that unfortunately didn’t end as planned. Because as the old saying goes, “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade,” infused with vodka of course.
Tag: hemingway
As much as we’d rather not admit it, we all know what it feels like to hold a grudge. It’s a different breed of anger; a gnawing kind that quietly lingers under the surface while the outside appears otherwise contained.
A grudge is not that instant implosion you feel in your core when someone does something truly horrific that moment. It’s a deep, slow simmering that reemerges in your chest whenever you see the object of your wrath: a person who wronged you, perhaps hasn’t apologized, and maybe doesn’t even know you were ever upset.
Oh, and it’s totally unhealthy, too.
“All the data we know of, in regards to health and the effects of chronic anger, hostility can lead to heart disease and other issues, like depressed mood,” says Kristen Carpenter, Ph.D, a psychologist and the director of Women’s Behavioral Health at Ohio State’s Wexner Medical Center. “Even those with no history of heart issues are likely to develop them.”
Here’s how it all works: The more often you’re angry, or the longer you hold onto those feelings of unrest, the higher your stress level. When you’re under stress, your body gets a surge of cortisol to help you combat the effects of the stressor, suppressing nonessential functions like immune response and better enabling your body to utilize glucose. You’re essentially in a modern-day “fight or flight” mode.
Normally, though, this effect is short-lived. Except when it’s chronic. In that case, high levels of cortisol never shut off, throwing your system into a tailspin, leaving you prone to problems like heart disease, weight gain, anxiety and depression.
Carpenter says you can’t necessarily prove a cause-and-effect relationship between holding a grudge and medical issues, but the links between anger, stress and poor health are there. “The findings hold, regardless over other risk factors,” says Carpenter. “Holding a grudge is stressful. If you see the person everyday, it’s a constant trigger — activated frequently, on top of other daily hassles.”
The research indicates clear correlations. This study in the journal Circulation, for instance, showed men and women prone to anger were at increased risk of coronary heart disease and death. Another example? A 2007 article published in JAMA shows how chronic stress can lead to higher blood pressure, which, over time, can lead to issues like heart attack and stroke.
To let go of these grudges, Carpenter prescribes two potential solutions: a change in perspective or open communication.
“Communication really is an important piece,” she says. “People are always reticent to talk about difficult things. Sometimes with our closest others, it may be easier — but with a friend or a boss, it can be hard. It’s emotional, which doesn’t always feel appropriate.”
And bottom line?
Admitting we’ve been hurt puts us in a vulnerable position emotionally. A place not many of us willingly want to be. Carpenter says asking yourself how you can have a conversation about the issue at hand that’s productive is important. Don’t just rehash the issue and your feelings. Work on solutions to the issue.
The other way to deal with a grudge is to shift your perspective. “Maybe you just need to let it go, or work around it,” says Carpenter. “Ask yourself: is this an actual problem or a frustration?”
Especially in career contexts, with colleagues and bosses, making adjustments on your own can release a lot of anger surrounding life’s many unchangeable acquaintances. “A problem impairs you in some way. It is solvable, and you should be able to make active steps and take action,” says Carpenter. For instance, a member of your team at work is consistently not delivering her assignments, forcing everyone to work harder — and look bad in front of the boss.
A frustration might be that a team member consistently turns in work later than you’d like it. “In this case, how is ruminating helping?” Carpenter says. “Sometimes, you must accept that you cannot change others’ behavior and adapt your strategies accordingly.” For instance, you may find other work you can chip away at while you wait for her to send over her assignment.
If all else fails, reevaluate. “If it’s constantly causing you stress, you may have to ask if it’s the right relationship, friendship or job for you,” says Carpenter.
Just don’t hold a grudge, or hold onto anger. Your heart and health will thank you.
A quick Google search on microwave dangers could leave you rather unsettled, with claims spanning everything from causing cancer to creating harmful franken-foods. I get it. The rumors made me nervous, too.
As a dietitian, though, I’m a science girl, and I have to go with the facts. So we’re going to talk about all of the reasons why it’s totally cool to use your microwave oven (and some tips on how to use them even more effectively) and then we’re going to talk about why I still avoid using mine.
Microwave Controversy No. 1: They emit radiation and are slowly killing us all!
False. Well, true and false. Yes, microwaves emit some radiation. So do laptops, cell phones, and televisions, and that doesn’t seem to stop us from being glued to those devices practically 24/7. Here are some other facts about microwaves and radiation:
- Like a light bulb, the only time a microwave oven emits energy (in this case, radiation), is when it’s turned on. So if it isn’t on, it’s nothing but a big hunk of metal and plastic.
- If it is on, only teeny tiny amounts of the radiation leak out into the surrounding area, provided the microwave is (a) clean, (b) sealed tightly, and (c) not tampered with by your crazy Uncle Joe who thinks he’s the next Inspector Gadget.
- The very small amounts of radiation that can trickle out (well below government safety levels, by the way) drop off almost completely the further away from the oven you stand while it’s on.
Microwave Controversy No. 2: They destroy the nutrition and molecular structure of food!
Microwaves can actually be the best tool in the kitchen for cooking vegetables without losing many nutrients. Avoid cooking them in a big bowl of water, though. The same way that boiling vegetables on a stove can lead to serious nutrient loss, it can happen with vegetables cooked in the microwave with lots of water too. Oh, and the only molecular changes that happen to food in a microwave are the ones that would happen when you cook that food with any appliance: stove, oven, or toaster.
So we have established that microwaves aren’t giving us cancer and they actually can be pretty handy for cooking foods, but you’re still feeling uneasy. Here are some tips for microwaving even more safely and effectively:
- Don’t stand next to the microwave when it’s on! Go take out the trash, grab the mail, or even walk to the other side of the room.
- Definitely never microwave in anything that doesn’t specifically say “microwave safe,” because it could very well break down and leach into your food. Ick. Also, I encourage everyone to stick specifically to glass. No matter how plastic containers are labeled, even “safe” ones get rather soft and flimsy after being used in the microwave repeatedly.
- Keep your microwave oven clean and in working order. Never use a microwave that doesn’t close properly or one that can be started/turned on while the door is still open.
- Never put metal or foil in the microwave.
- Be careful when heating liquids. Sometimes in the microwave, liquids become “super heated,” which basically means they are hot enough to be boiling but you don’t see any bubbles. Something as simple as bringing it into contact with a spoon to stir it can trigger the boiling, and that can cause some nasty heat burns.
Microwave ovens do not cause cancer. They do not emit appreciable amounts of radiation. They do not inherently destroy our food. So why do I, as a health professional, avoid them? Because I’m just paranoid and overly cynical?
Maybe a little.
Mostly, though, it comes down to this: We live in a world of instant gratification. We eat hyper-palatable processed foods that compromise our ability to appreciate the beautifully complex flavors found in nature. Twitter became the faster-paced Facebook; Snapchat became the faster-paced Instagram. Do we really need one more thing to speed up our lives and cater to our constant craving for immediate placation?
Do you really need to thaw that slice of bread in 20 seconds as opposed to a minute or two in the toaster? Do I really not have five minutes to boil water on the stove for tea? Can we not pull vegetables out of the freezer a few hours in advance to let them thaw on their own in the fridge? (It’s ok, sometimes I forget, too.)
I’m not asking anyone to trash their microwaves. They have their place; they’re there for us in a pinch. I’m simply asking, what would happen if once, every so often, we actually slowed down and savored the sweet, sweet anticipation of waiting for something for a change?
I’m supposed to look like what?
I have this thought every time I see altered celeb photos or even personal images on social media. It’s amazing what you can do with Photoshop. What’s really sad is that many people believe these flawless and often unrealistic images are real.
Body honesty is one of my new favorite trends. It’s finally killing Photoshop, as women stand up for themselves. It’s nice seeing real women who look like real women instead of like Barbie dolls.
Flawless Need Not Apply
I would love to see a single person raise their hand if their body is 100% flawless. No takers? I didn’t think so. Take a good look at a celebrity’s retouched photo in a magazine and now look at the same person during an interview. Notice all the differences?
While we’re busy killing ourselves to eliminate every little flaw, the people we’re trying to emulate are equally flawed. They just have photo editors blurring blemishes, shaving off those extra 10 pounds, and smoothing out the cellulite. Of course they look beautiful, but it’s not real.
We’ve been raised in a culture where we think we’re supposed to look perfect all the time. If we don’t fit the mold, we’re made fun of. The new trend shows us that flawless isn’t the same as beautiful after all.
Social Media To The Rescue
It takes courage for a woman to post a real image of herself on social media, especially if she’s not model thin with no flaws. I know I think about every picture I post: Does this one make me look fat? Is my hair too messy? Where did that arm fat come from? I want to look as good as possible, so I second-guess everything. Social media is finally helping change that.
More and more women, including celebrities, are posting unretouched photos of themselves. Check out Instagram and Twitter. You’ll start seeing the body honesty trend in action. It’s truly a beautiful thing and one I’m not ashamed to participate in.
Sure, some people are offering up the usual negative comments, but they’re being overshadowed by positive, supportive comments. People are coming together and realizing they don’t have to hide their flaws any longer. Social media gives everyone the perfect platform to stand up and be heard (or seen, in this case).
Focusing On A Positive Body Image
Ask most women how they feel about their body and they’ll give you a list of things they hate. Is there really anything wrong? No. The flaws I hate most are things I’ve been told I shouldn’t like, such as my thighs and tummy.
Is a woman no longer beautiful if she has stretch marks after having a baby? Do your thighs have to have a noticeable gap between them for you to be attractive? These things just mean you’re a beautiful, healthy woman. It shows you’re living life and not living in a gym 24/7.
Every day I see new rules on how a woman should look. I quit keeping up with it a long time ago. I just don’t need that kind of stress in my life.
Body honesty is about focusing on a positive body image for once. It doesn’t matter if you have cellulite on your thighs or your tummy’s a little jiggly. It’s about appreciating your body as is. After all, no one is perfect.
Celebrities Joining In
Celebrities are starting to speak out about Photoshop. Lady Gaga and Kate Winslet were extremely vocal when they found their photos were retouched. They were proud of what they looked like and didn’t feel the need to show a false version of themselves.
Women aren’t the only ones standing up against Photoshopped images. Brad Pitt wanted his flaws showcased on the cover of W. He still looks great even with the crow’s feet.
The bravery of the few has prompted more celebrities join the movement. I was happy to see older celebrities posing nude and nearly nude in magazines to show that beauty isn’t a one-size-fits-all deal. They showed off their flaws and looked incredible while doing it.
Photoshop Doesn’t Inspire
Photoshopped images don’t inspire people to look better. Instead they just feel body shamed. For instance, the fitness inspiration craze–with photos of ultra slim, super sculpted bodies–at most inspires a handful of people to exercise. It makes everyone else feel like they’re too flawed to even try.
I’ve found myself feeling depressed while flipping through a fitness or beauty magazine. I’ve used the same products the women in the pictures use and done the same exercises. What was wrong with me that I couldn’t look like them?
It wasn’t my fault. Those women had blemishes and fine lines. They had thighs that touched and abs that weren’t perfect. I just didn’t know that until I saw them outside of their Photoshopped pictures.
If perfect images don’t inspire, why should they be front and center? It’s time for something real. Body honesty gives all of us a reprieve from unrealistic expectations.
Changing What Attractive Means
Many women think you need six-pack abs, stick-like legs, flawless skin, and a large chest to look sexy. I say if you’re spending that much time on your body, you probably don’t have time to notice if anyone is looking.
Thanks to body honesty taking social media by storm, we’re finally starting to redefine what really is attractive. Confidence and being comfortable in your own skin is what’s truly sexy.
When people feel good about themselves, they’re more likely to eat better and exercise right. I felt better and followed a healthier lifestyle when I didn’t feel like a failure for not looking perfect.
As it turns out, I look great just the way I am. All shapes and sizes look incredible and attractive when flaws are no longer taboo.
Becoming Part Of The Trend
The trend is just starting to gain ground. In this overly Photoshopped society, it’s up to every one of us to make sure body honesty overtakes the fakes.
The first step is to take a real photo of yourself and post it on social media. Don’t be afraid to post a selfie when you’re lounging in your sweats with no makeup on. It makes me feel more confident about myself when I see others posting photos where they’re not exactly looking their best.
Go ahead and share images promoting a positive body image. Add in a supportive comment while you’re at it. The more people who participate, the more power the trend gets.
Photoshop might never disappear completely, but the mask is gone. We all know it’s fake.
Body honesty is real and beautiful. It’s time we embrace the actual beauty in the world.
By nature, I’m kind of a loner. I’m an introvert who works on writing every day whilst alone. Not exactly a recipe for oodles of friends, right?
But for most of my life, I didn’t feel like I needed oodles of friends. I was perfectly happy reading and writing most of the time, meeting and greeting only when totally necessary–until I was sidelined with a health condition that kicked my butt for the better part of two years. Two years of chilling at home, trying to get better, watching the outside world pass me by, and being unable to take part.
When you have something taken away from you, no matter what it is, you long for it. So when I finally healed, you better believe I had an undying itch to be social. Problem is, I don’t have a normal 9 to 5 job, and therefore do not have a regular friend group.
However, I creatively solved that problem in a few ways. Let’s take a peek.
Get active in your city.
There are usually tons of events around your city, most of which you probably aren’t attending. How do you find out about these little gems? A few ways. First of all, at the most basic level, I look at flyers; 90 percent of these are “meh,” but around 10 percent are kinda interesting. I’ve found out about mixers, wine tastings, author readings, and beer crawls this way.
Also, if you’re not on it, find out if your city has an active Meetup scene. Mine does, and there are so many cool things to do. You can go rock climbing with fellow adventurers, hit the trails with other hikers, sip Pinot with vino lovers, or just mix it up with other professionals in your age bracket. Plus, everybody is there to meet new people, so the likelihood of being iced out is virtually zero.
Start convos with random strangers.
Sometimes I see people who just look interesting, don’t you? Maybe they’re engrossed in a book or sipping a coffee beverage that looks amazingly delicious. And I want to talk to ’em! But since we live in a world where people don’t really know how to interact with others (thanks, smartphones), sometimes these interactions feel scary and uncomfortable.
But don’t ignore the opportunity in these random encounters. Pick people who seem social and chat. My strategy for this is eavesdropping (yep) or commenting on a gadget or item said stranger has in their possession. If it’s a book, tell them you’ve “been meaning to read it! How is it?” If it’s a gadget, ask them how they like it and say that you’ve been checking out a new phone/tablet/laptop/etc. People have also used this concept on me; it works just wonderfully, by the way.
Ultimately, you only have to talk about the conversation starter for a hot sec; if the person is welcoming, ask questions about other things. If the person doesn’t seem interested in continuing to chat, abandon ship with nothing lost.
Use tech to meet IRL.
Yes, you can use apps to mingle and meet, not just date. For instance, I recently talked to the communications director at Tinder who insists the app was designed and marketed as a networking device–not a hookup tool or a dating destination. Currently in a relationship, she uses it to network her way all over the globe.
You can use more basic social media to connect to others in real life. For instance, a fellow freelance writer in my area found me on Twitter and asked if I wanted to grab coffee because we had a ton of mutual interests. I said of course! She quickly became one of my good friends.
If you choose to do something like this, though, meet in a public area you know well, and definitely don’t ignore any bad vibes. (Your gut doesn’t lie.)
The bottom line: Use social media to actually enhance your social life. If it’s not doing that, it’s a time-suck.
Do something you love and something you would never do normally.
I suggest two things: Sign up for an activity you love and pursue an interest you would never normally jump into.
Why? You tend to meet like-minded people when you do the things you love. And it’s comfortable. So start here. If you take that cooking class or attend that poetry reading, you’ll have instant conversation starters for those who also attend, on topics you know well and actually enjoy. (Yay!)
Then again, sometimes your horizons just need to be broadened. If your current friend group is ho-hum, try something you’d normally turn down. Like parasailing. Or a triathlon. Or an art class. When you choose, think about what sounds fulfilling to you–for instance, training hard to complete a marathon or getting in touch with nature by hiking. Anything that you imagine and think, “it’d be cool if I could do that.”
You might find that your favorite hobby was hiding beneath a pile of self-doubt, and you also might just meet your new best friend in the process.
At the end of the day, making friends is all about the effort you put in. The more welcoming energy you put out into the world, the more you will get back. So smile at people. Be kind to people. Ask questions when you’re curious, and don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and face a little rejection. If an interaction doesn’t go well, it’s not the end of the world.
You have so little to lose, and so much to gain.
The modern office is a veritable mine field of unspoken rules and potential faux pas. Nowhere is this more evident than the office break room, particularly the communal fridge. Some people treat it like it’s their own private fridge, without regard for fellow co-workers. They’re the absolute worst.
Don’t be the worst.
There are a few simple guidelines for office fridge and general break room etiquette that will ensure you never become THAT guy or gal. For the sake of every one of your co-workers, follow them!
Don’t Eat Other People’s Food
This shouldn’t even have to be said, but don’t eat other people’s food! Come on, are you in kindergarten? Eating someone else’s lunch shows a total lack of respect and empathy for those around you. It’s hard to trust someone with that important project if you can’t even trust them not to eat your sandwich.
Label Things
If someone is bold enough to eat another person’s lunch, a Sharpie probably won’t stop him/her. However, labeling your food, especially common items like yogurt, will help avoid confusion. Dating food isn’t a bad idea either. If you keep milk around for morning coffee or cereal, write the date it was opened on the carton. Your co-workers definitely don’t want to be involved in making an artisanal batch of office yogurt.
Pick Up After Yourself
This seems like another obvious thing some people don’t comprehend. No one else wants to involved in a makeshift science project, so, for the love of all that’s holy, throw away your old food! Not only is moldy food patently gross, It’s also taking up valuable real estate. You know, for food that’s not fuzzy.
Don’t Be a Hoarder
Some people like to bring a week’s worth of lunches in on Monday and stack them in the fridge. Don’t do this. It might seem really convenient for you, but it’s rude to take up way more space than you actually need for the day. Planning ahead and making a five days worth of food is fine. In fact, it’s responsible. But how about you store that Tupperware Jenga in your own fridge and bring one meal each day?
Be Realistic
It’s good that you don’t want to waste food. It doesn’t hurt to be realistic, though. Let’s face it, you’re probably not going to eat the last three bites of that Italian sub or chicken penne later. Go ahead and throw it out. There’s no need to crowd the fridge with good intentions.
There Are Certain Things You Don’t Heat Up
When it comes to an office break room, there are considerate people that don’t heat up seafood and then there are monsters. Considering how shrimp, crab and fish smell after being heated up, it’s a wonder that anyone saves Red Lobster leftovers at all. But some people do. They either have a non-functioning sense of smell or a total disregard for making the break room smell like low tide at the wharf. Seriously, the smell does not go away. Please, we’re begging you, keep the leftover salmon at home.
Learn To Use The Microwave
Speaking of heating things up…Learn how to use the microwave. You don’t need to heat up pasta for seven minutes. All that will get you is a burnt tongue and a microwave that looks like a crime scene. Also, use the popcorn button! The only thing that smells worse and lasts longer than reheated seafood is burnt popcorn.
Respect The Coffee
If you drink the last cup of coffee, it’s your duty to make a new pot. This is one of the oldest break room rules in the book. It’s probably in the Constitution somewhere. Your fellow workers depend on the magical elixir to get them through the day. Don’t deny them that.
Now that you’re educated on proper break room etiquette, don’t be afraid to preach the gospel to your co-workers! Oh, and, check that coffee pot one more time, just to be sure…
There’s been an enormous amount of hype surrounding the term “clean eating” these days. Amazingly, I’ve watched so many unsuspecting consumers get sucked into the trend with very little effort on the part of its promoters. With wild health and weight loss claims being made by so-called nutrition experts, chefs, and celebrities, it’s easy to see how people get drawn in.
In my opinion, however, the craze itself is nothing shy of a cult with millions of die-hard supporters eagerly seeking to either lose weight and get fit or just make money.
Widespread popularity aside, the term clean eating is not new. The phenomenon itself is reminiscent of the bell-bottoms craze, where if one waits long enough, what’s old becomes new again within a matter of years. The concept actually dates back to the natural food movement of the late 1960s and early 1970s—a movement that essentially commercialized and profitized the health food store and organic food retail markets.
I first heard the term “clean” associated with the word “eating” well over a decade and a half ago when I was a newly converted vegan. During that time, seasoned vegans were always stressing the importance of “clean eating” for good health, often also referring to plant-based foods as “clean foods.”
Despite living as a faithful vegan back then, I never truly accepted this notion. To me the idea of clean eating was itself blatantly pompous, judgmental and self-righteous. In my mind, suggesting that we as vegans were eating clean inherently implied that all non-vegans were in essence eating “dirty.”
Nevertheless, I remained a vegan for nearly three years, albeit cringing at the mere uttering of the words clean eating.
Although I’m no longer a vegan, my past adoption of this lifestyle has truly changed my general dietary approach for the better. For me, plant-based eating is essentially a way of life, as I can effortlessly consume in excess of 15 to 20 servings of fresh veggies, fruits, and legumes on any given day. The only difference now is that I regularly incorporate seafood, poultry, and occasional red meat into my diet as well.
Unfortunately, from a vegan perspective, I’ve converted back and am now living the life of a “dirty” eater… Go figure.
But, interestingly enough, with the evolution of my personal diet, I’ve also noticed a total transformation in the concept of eating clean, where such animal-based foods are now generally accepted.
In this day and age, clean eating seems to have a new set of rules that far exceed those of plant-based eating in the past. Oddly, there seems to be no real consensus on what exactly those rules are, as all clean eaters have set their own unique standards when it comes to which foods are “good” or “bad” and, therefore, which foods should be accepted versus rejected.
On the one hand, animal-based foods undoubtedly remain “dirty” among vegan circles, but on the other hand newer breeds of clean eaters (Paleolithic and low-carb dieters) remarkably take on the dietary habits of carnivores. These new breed philosophies, however, are a little less credible, as they’re largely based on unsubstantiated facts and blanket statements about generally healthy foods like grains, dairy foods, and even seemingly harmless foods like carrots and fruit.
Still, most proponents and promoters can’t even define or explain what it actually means to “eat clean” and why exactly it needs to be done, yet so many wholeheartedly swear by the practice and advise others to do the same.
Seriously, with foods like grains, carrots and fruit being dismissed and put on the “dirty” list, there’s almost nothing left to eat! Might as well enjoy your pizza and French fries if it’s all bad, right?
Now, I will say that some consensus does lie in the acceptance of healthy foods that are composed of minimal “real” ingredients and the general shunning of processed foods. But the latter brings about another gray area, as all processed foods aren’t necessarily bad for your health. In truth, there’s a multitude of minimally processed foods that are packed full of valuable nutrients.
Ironically though, some of these foods exist in the diets of many so-called clean eaters—including pre-bagged and pre-cut vegetables and fruits, pre-packaged soy foods and yogurts, frozen or canned foods, nuts and nut butters, and, of course, those delicious protein powders and green superfood mixes. Unbeknownst to them, any product that has been altered from its natural state is indeed processed.
In other words, if the foods on one’s plate didn’t come straight from the ground, they’ve been processed.
Clean eating isn’t real.
It’s all personal interpretation, personal preference, and general feasibility. Ask 500 people what it means to eat clean and you’ll likely get 500 different answers.
A woman living in a rural area food desert once asked me if it were possible for her to “eat clean” with canned goods like vegetables, fruits, beans, tuna and sardines.
I quickly answered: “Heck yeah! Just be sure to choose varieties with no added sugar or sodium and try to incorporate frozen foods whenever possible.”
Understanding that she just wanted to eat healthier but had been sold on a trend she knew absolutely nothing about, I gave this woman an answer that was simple, honest and straightforward in a non-judgmental way. Having been raised in a food desert myself, I didn’t want to crush her spirit, especially given the fact that she was making an honest effort to eat better in spite of limited access to affordable, fresh foods.
You see, depending on your socioeconomic status, resource availability, health and fitness goals, general lifestyle, and even your race or ethnicity, clean eating can be whatever you want it to be.
The primary downside of the clean eating trend is the prescriptive yet conflicting nature of the rules and recommendations, as most are solely based on generic guidelines, personal experiences, and individual preferences.
When it comes to enhancing your overall health and fitness, there’s no “one size fits all” approach. It’s all about incorporating a sensible diet based on sound nutrition. Such a diet is one that’s equally balanced in minimally processed carbohydrates (vegetables and fruits, grains and legumes), healthy fats (olive oil, nuts and seeds), and high-quality protein sources (whether animal-based or not).
Don’t be so quick to jump on the clean eating bandwagon, as it’s not at all a magic bullet. In reality, the notion of eating clean is just another resurfacing of the same ol’ heresy, repackaged over the years and repeatedly shoved down the throats of unsuspecting consumers for sheer profit.
Ever so slowly, Americans are realizing that dependence on fossil fuels might not be a great long-term plan. Even if some members of Congress aren’t too excited to hop aboard the green bandwagon.
People in the Aloha State are taking renewable energy very seriously, though. Hawaiians have seen enough rising seas, diminishing rainfall and increasing storms, and they’re doing something about it. The state could very well be a window into the future of energy in the United States.
The isolated archipelago has good reason to examine its policies. It has seen the toll of dependence on fossil fuels.
Hawaii has some of the highest electric bills in the country (two to three times the national average in some cases) because it relies overwhelmingly on imported oil for energy. It isn’t cheap, either. As the most oil-dependent state in the nation, Hawaii spends more than $4 billion a year on foreign oil to meet energy needs.
Perhaps more startlingly, It has also seen one of its most iconic beaches start to vanish.
Though few realize it, the famous Waikiki Beach has been thoroughly eroded due to rising sea levels. The sand that tourists are so eager to feel between their toes is artificially replenished. If the beach is lost for good, it could lead to millions, or even billions, in lost economic revenue.
Recently, Hawaii Governor David Ige took a bold step in addressing these issues. Ige signed into law an ambitious measure, one that aims to replace fossil fuels completely with renewable sources by 2045.
One hundred percent clean energy.
Furthermore, there are other benchmarks to meet. They include: 30 percent usage of renewable sources by 2020 and 70 percent usage of renewable sources by 2040. The law is the first of its kind in the country, and accordingly, is the most aggressive green initiative in recent memory.
But is it possible?
It will be a difficult transition, but Hawaii has many advantages due to its location. The islands are home to plenty of sun, wind, water and geoactivity. For that very reason, it is already becoming a center of green research and innovation. In fact, it may be the state best equipped to deal with solar panels, wind turbines and water turbines, as they provide important sources of energy moving forward.
Unfortunately, it’s not simply a matter of having enough sun or waves or geothermal steam. The more concerning problem is the infrastructure needed for these new sources of electricity. A key priority, and necessity, in the renewable energy measure is grid modernization and an inter island connection between separate grids.
Upgrading the islands’ electrical grids would increase efficiency and storage potential. Meanwhile, a link between the Oahu and Maui Island grids would reduce electricity rates and potentially save more than $400 million over a 30-year period.
Still, Hawaii’s initiative should be an example to the rest of the country.
The state’s politicians looked beyond party lines and accepted the environmental and economic problems facing them. The state’s citizens also refused to stick their heads in the sand, or what’s left of it. A 2014 report estimates 97 percent of the public supports expansion of renewable energy.
If a small state in the middle of the ocean can do it, there’s no reason other states can’t follow suit. Studies have already shown that wind power and solar power could provide viable and significant sources of energy for the country. Some researchers believe every state in the union could supply 100 percent of its energy via renewable sources by 2050.
Those of us in the contiguous 48 must ask, what are we waiting for?
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Your Weight Is Not the Problem
I’m a dietitian, and I’m tired of talking about body weight.
You might think that would be a career-ender, a confession I ought not dare utter aloud. After all, what do dietitians do when faced with an obesity epidemic, if not help people achieve a healthy weight? Weight loss should be my bread and butter (or, perhaps more appropriately, my organic whole grain bread and mashed avocado?), but lately, I’m kind of, well…over it.
I want to let you in on a little secret: obesity is not anyone’s problem.
It’s okay, I’ll wait for the gasps and murmurs to settle down. Hear me out. Obesity can cause many problems but it is not, itself, the problem. It is, in fact, a symptom, a consequence of our collective habits, behaviors, and preferences. When we fixate on a symptom, ignoring the tapestry of circumstances that brought it into existence, we miss the opportunity to make real, lasting change. It’s also, quite frankly, exhausting.
Imagine you’re in a boat, and it’s starting to sink because it’s filling up with water. Panicked, you start scooping the water up with a bucket and dumping it back into the lake. You view the excess water as the problem, not even seeing the very large holes at the bottom of the boat, causing it to fill up in the first place. You can spend every waking minute trying to scoop out the excess water, but you’ll never solve the real problem (the holes), and the boat will fill right back up.
So, you see, the number on the bathroom scale is just a distraction, something that leaves us panicked and not thinking clearly enough to see the bigger picture. Achieving and maintaining a healthy weight can be a huge piece of your health puzzle, but it’s more likely to fall into place when you start treating the underlying issues.
If you’re not sure where to start, here are my top five recommendations for becoming healthier that have nothing to do with weight.
1. Explore mindfulness.
Mindfulness refers to focusing your attention on the present: one action, one person (or group of people) at a time. Though we like to think we are master multi-taskers, our brains can actually only focus on one task at a time. It simply puts the less interesting, more familiar tasks on autopilot, and before we know it, we’ve hit the bottom of the bag of chips during the season premiere of The Bachelorette. (Every year I tell myself I won’t even watch, and every year…)
2. Eat real food.
We could spend an entire day discussing what this means in all of its nuances, but at its core, I think we all understand. Baked potatoes are real food but sour cream and onion chips are not; a roasted pork tenderloin is real food, but pepperoni is not; and 100% maple syrup is real food, but splenda is not. None of these foods is bad or forbidden, but the more often we choose real, whole foods, the better off we are.
3. Move more.
You don’t have to run a marathon or even a 5k. You could walk to your mailbox and back, take a lap around your office building after lunch, or stand up and stretch during T.V. commercial breaks. Physical activity is not binary; it is not all or nothing. Just like number two above, the more often you choose moving around over sedentary activities, the better, but that doesn’t mean the only way to be healthy is to never stand still again. Every little bit helps!
4. Meditate.
If formal meditation isn’t your thing, think of it as time taken for personal reflection or stress relief. One easy technique is a mind body scan: close your eyes and every time you inhale, tense up a body part, then release as you exhale; start down at your toes and move slowly all the way up to your head. Journaling, a warm bubble bath, and dancing are other ideas that may work for different people.
5. Listen to your body.
When we ignore hunger pangs because we fear overeating, or we use a carton of ice cream to soothe a heartache, we teach our body to distrust its own signals. Eat when you’re hungry and stop when you’re full (not stuffed). Call a supportive friend when you’re sad. Go for a run when you’re angry. Your body has a lot to tell you, if you just give it the chance.
If you are tired of trying to bail yourself out of a sinking boat, all you have to do is put down your bucket. Listen to your body. Fuel it, strengthen it, and rest it well. Patch the holes, and embrace your new, healthy life.
When picking between polar opposites, the choices we make say a lot about who we are. When you’re at the grocery store, do you want paper or plastic bags? When changing your baby, do you use cloth diapers or disposable (or compostable)? When talking about crime and punishment, do you support the death penalty or life in prison? If you’re old enough to remember the classic Miller Lite commercials, you might still be wrestling with tastes great or less filling? If you’re in the mood for a philosophical discussion with no end sight, chicken or egg? Now, even your bedtime is an issue: are you early bird or a night owl? The two, of course, are mutually exclusive–and the differences are quite stark.
Since they’ve already been up for a while, let’s start with the morning people.
A number of studies over the past few years have found that those who get up early are generally happier than those who sleep in. They’re less likely to be diagnosed with narcissism or depression or to take antidepressants. Early risers are also less likely to have problems with addiction, to smoke, to drink alcohol, or to struggle with eating disorders. There also seems to be a connection between the amount of morning light you’re exposed to and your ability to control your weight–regardless of your age, how much you eat, what season it is, or how much you exercise.
Speaking of exercise, people who do their workouts in the morning tend to stick with their routines longer and, as a result, their blood pressure is lower and they’re less likely to be obese. The combination of light and exercise helps regulate your body’s internal rhythms, meaning that you’ll sleep better and you’ll be better able to handle sleep disruptions, such as adjusting to those time changes when going on or coming off of daylight savings time.
But before all you early risers get too smug, you need to hear the other side of this story.
At this point, all the night owls should have rolled out of bed, so let’s talk about you. As with those early-to-bedders, there’s an impressive amount of academic research showing that night owls are the favored ones. One recent study, for example, found that young adults who stay up late and sleep late are, on average, smarter than their counterparts who have a more traditional sleep schedule.
Other studies show that they’re also more alert, have better memories, and are more social, smarter, and more creative. The theory is that with all those morning people safely in their beds, the night owls can let their creative juices fly with no one around to criticize. That could explain why night owls tend to earn more than their early-rising cousins.
At this point, all the night owls should have rolled out of bed, so let’s talk about you. As with those early-to-bedders, there’s an impressive amount of academic research showing that night owls are the favored ones. One recent study, for example, found that young adults who stay up late and sleep late are, on average, smarter than their counterparts who have a more traditional sleep schedule.
Night owls, now it’s your turn to rein in your smugness.
Other studies show that they’re also more alert, have better memories, and are more social, smarter, and more creative. The theory is that with all those morning people safely in their beds, the night owls can let their creative juices fly with no one around to criticize. That could explain why night owls tend to earn more than their early-rising cousins.
There’s a big difference between causation and correlation. In other words, just because two things seem to be related, doesn’t mean that one of them caused the other. So going to bed–and waking up–a few hours earlier is no guarantee that you’ll be any less of a narcissist and it probably won’t help you quit smoking. At the same time, staying up past your normal bedtime probably won’t increase your IQ, and it’s less likely to increase your salary than just working harder.