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Happy x Mindful Wellbeing

What Is Impostor Syndrome, And How Can I Overcome It?

Have you ever looked at your achievements and felt like you don’t really deserve them? Have you received an amazing award but felt like you got it based on luck, not merit? Do you worry that one day, everyone will realize you’re not as talented or smart as you seem?
You’re not alone. “Impostor syndrome,” as it’s known, is surprisingly common, especially among talented and high-achieving individuals. Also known as the imposter phenomenon, impostorism, or fraud syndrome, impostor syndrome involves feeling like a fraud who doesn’t really deserve their achievements.
Feeling like a fraud can weigh on your mental health and work performance. You might constantly feel anxious because you’re afraid of others “discovering” that you’re not truly talented, or you may feel the need to overwork yourself to prove your worth.
[pullquote align=”center”]”If left unchecked, imposter syndrome can be an insidious thought pattern that can lead to increased stress, anxiety, burnout, and even depression.”
—Desiree Wiercyski, life coach[/pullquote]
But it doesn’t have to be this way. Impostor syndrome can be overcome.
If you think you’re experiencing impostor syndrome, here’s what you can do about it.

What is impostor syndrome?

The concept of the impostor phenomenon was first explored by psychologists Pauline R. Clance and Suzanne A. Imes in 1978. They described it as “an internal experience of intellectual phoniness that appears to be particularly prevalent and intense among a select sample of high achieving women.” Since then, the term has been applied to more than just women.
Impostor syndrome isn’t classified as a mental illness, and it doesn’t appear in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), which is the guidebook used to diagnose mental illnesses. That said, impostor syndrome can exacerbate disorders like anxiety and depression.
“If left unchecked, imposter syndrome can be an insidious thought pattern that can lead to increased stress, anxiety, burnout, and even depression,” says Desiree Wiercyski, a life coach for ambitious and career-focused women. Wiercyski runs a self-guided course on working through impostor syndrome.
“When you have consistent negative thoughts cycling through your mind, it’s very likely that they can trigger other negative feelings and emotions, which can lead to an overall lower quality of life,” Wiercyski says, adding that impostor syndrome can negatively impact your work performance, turning those “can’t-do” thoughts into a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy.
Impostor syndrome can be accompanied by feelings of inadequacy and poor self-esteem as well as feeling overly modest about one’s achievements and accomplishments, says Robyn McKay, PhD, a psychologist and career advisor. McKay co-authored the book Smart Girls in the 21st Century: Understanding Talented Girls and Women.

Who experiences impostor syndrome?

Anyone can experience impostor syndrome, but Wiercyski says she finds impostor syndrome to be more prevalent in women and minorities. “When you go through life with any sort of minority status, you’re in a sense being constantly told that there are pieces of you that don’t fit in with the culture, that you’re not living up to pre-conceived standards,” she says. “If you’re constantly told to change, to bend and shift to adapt to expectations, then standing up in a situation where you are the expert, where you do need confidence, is so much more difficult.”
A 2017 study suggests there’s a link between discrimination and impostor syndrome in racial minority groups. In a New York Times article, Kevin Cokley, who co-authored the study, explained the correlation between imposter syndrome and discrimination. “Feeling like an impostor can exacerbate the impact of discrimination,” he said in the Times article. “This is what we found with African-American students in our study. I suspect that discrimination can also exacerbate the impact of impostorism.”
Even the most high-achieving, talented people experience it. “I work with women in tech and medicine primarily—and even those at the highest levels of leadership and influence report feeling at times like they’re going to get ‘found out’ as less intelligent or capable than what they’ve led their colleagues to believe,” says McKay.
Weircyski notes that impostor syndrome can be isolating, but it’s important to remember that if you’re experiencing these feelings, you’re not alone. Nobody wants to talk about the feelings associated with imposter syndrome because they fear being “found out,” and although there are few solid statistics on the number of people who experience impostor syndrome, both experts agree that it’s very common.

Do I have impostor syndrome?

As mentioned before, impostor syndrome isn’t believed to be a psychiatric disorder, so there are no strict criteria for diagnosis. However, Clance, one of the psychologists who coined the term “impostor phenomenon,” does have a self-guided test you can take if you believe you’re experiencing imposter syndrome.
People who have impostor syndrome might engage in the following:

Downplaying Achievements

“They may be overly modest about their accomplishments, and even unwilling to advocate for their career advancement because they don’t want it to seem like they’re bragging,” says McKay. When praised, they might respond by saying “I just got lucky!” or “Anyone can do it.”

Always Needing to Know More

People with impostor syndrome constantly feel doubtful of their knowledge. They might over-research something even if they’re very knowledgeable on the topic. “This isn’t a matter of faking it until you make it; folks who experience this have objective knowledge and expertise in a topic but will turn down opportunities to share their knowledge,” Wiercyski says.

Insisting on Working Alone and Micromanaging

Wiercyski says that people who have impostor syndrome often feel like they have to do all the work, not because they think they’re the only one competent enough to do it, but because they’re afraid other workers will realize they’re a fraud if they see how they work. As such, they might be afraid to share their work or delegate to others.

Perfectionism

People with impostor syndrome often want their work to be perfect before showing others. “This is because they feel like if it’s not perfect, then they’ll lose credibility or respect,” Wiercyski says. “Often, perfectionism can be one of the biggest things that fuels imposter syndrome. Either the perfectionist takes too long to get something done [or] it doesn’t happen, and that reinforces the idea that they’re a fake.”

Volunteering

They might take on too many responsibilities to prove their worth, or they might volunteer for jobs below their pay-grade, says McKay.

Being Excessively Shy in Meetings

“They may not speak up in meetings and may have difficulty finding places to add value to a project,” McKay says. They might believe they have no ideas or innovations and wonder why they were chosen for the team when others confidently contribute, McKay adds. “They might not sit at the table in meetings, but instead take a seat against the wall.”
[pullquote align=”center”]“When you spend time focused on your accomplishments, you start to feel the same way you felt when you achieved those things. This will help provide objective evidence of your capabilities and also help you feel more confident.”
—Desiree Wiercyski, life coach[/pullquote]

How can I overcome impostor syndrome?

If you’re experiencing impostor syndrome, you can overcome it by working on the following:

Acknowledge the thoughts and understand where they’re coming from.

“It’s impossible to shift and reframe thoughts if you don’t have a crystal clear idea of what’s causing the thoughts and feelings,” says Wiercyski. Ask yourself where the feelings are coming from: What makes you believe you’re inadequate? Once you realize there’s no definite proof that you’re a fraud, and you see a lot of evidence to the contrary, it’s easier to remind yourself that you deserve your achievements.

Get a clear handle on your mission, vision, and purpose.

“If you are unclear on your purpose, it’s easy to slip into the impostor syndrome,” McKay says. Remind yourself of where your passions and talents lie. When you’re fueled by your own purpose, that motivation might shake you out of the self-sabotaging habits associated with impostorism.

Keep a journal of your achievements.

Write out every single accomplishment, training, and qualification you have as well as the praise you’ve received on big projects. “When you spend time focused on your accomplishments, you start to feel the same way you felt when you achieved those things,” Wiercyski says. “This will help provide objective evidence of your capabilities and also help you feel more confident.”

Talk about it.

When you realize you’re not feeling alone in your impostorism—and that many other people experience it—you’ll realize those negative thoughts don’t mean you’re actually ill-accomplished. We can’t all be frauds, can we? Wiercyski suggests talking to others about it like therapists, support groups, and friends. “Not only will you get the support you need and assistance from others in gaining perspective, you’ll also likely find that you’re not alone in experiencing those feelings,” she says.

Reframe the thoughts.

When negative thoughts come up, counter them with the evidence of your achievements, Wiercyski says. “For example, if you got a new job and the thought ‘I have no idea what I’m doing’ pops into your head, you can reframe and say, ‘They hired me based on my experience and knowledge, I have the key things I need to be successful.’”
Impostor syndrome is a common experience that can contribute to mental strain, but fortunately, it can be overcome with a little self-love and a lot of positivity.

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Healthy Pregnancy Motherhood

Braxton Hicks Contractions Versus The Real Deal

Pregnancy is hard. Another person is literally growing inside of you, pregnancy hormones have your body and emotions all over the place, and you know your feet are still attached to your legs even though you haven’t seen them in weeks. As if that’s not enough, Mother Nature decided to throw in a curve ball with Braxton Hicks contractions.
Braxton Hicks, put shortly, are your body’s way of warming up for labor. But how do you know if you’re experiencing real contractions or the practice variety?
We spoke to OB-GYNs Janelle Cooper, MD, at Baltimore’s Mercy Medical Center and Chase White, MD, at the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology at Einstein Medical Center in Philadelphia, to find out everything you need to know about Braxton Hicks contractions.

What are Braxton Hicks contractions?

“Braxton Hicks contractions are contractions that happen before the onset of labor. They can also be defined as contractions that occur in the third trimester that usually do not result in cervical dilation,” says Cooper. “The uterus is made of muscle tissue, and naturally muscles will contract from time to time, so Braxton Hicks can be felt earlier in pregnancy, sometimes even early in the second trimester.”

In addition, Braxton Hicks may actually help prep the uterus for labor.

“Braxton Hicks contractions may be a part of the process of remodeling the uterus in preparation for labor,” White explains. “Later in the third trimester, the irregular contractions that many women experience are not only the classic disorganized ‘Braxton Hicks’ contractions, but are actually normal, effective contractions. They occur infrequently at first, becoming more frequent as the pregnancy progresses. They start the process of cervical shortening, softening, and opening that ultimately results in active labor and then birth.”

What do Braxton Hicks feel like?

Some women describe Braxton Hicks contractions as feeling sort of like your abdomen suddenly tightens all over: not exactly painful, but not all that comfortable either. Others describe it more as a cramping sensation.
And according to Cooper, some of her patients have said Braxton Hicks contractions feel like “[the] baby is balling up tightly and then releasing the position.”

How will I know the difference between Braxton Hicks and real contractions?

Oh, you’ll know, my sweet little starfish. But just in case you don’t, there are some key differences between Braxton Hicks and real contractions.
Typically, Braxton Hicks contractions:

  • Are irregular and pretty infrequent. You may have several Braxton Hicks contractions in a row and then nothing for several days. Or you may have Braxton Hicks contractions once or twice a day but nothing that can be timed regularly.
  • Do not increase in intensity. As mentioned before, Braxton Hicks are usually uncomfortable—not painful—and they don’t increase in intensity as they occur.
  • Frequently disappear with no warning. Braxton Hicks are just as likely to stop with no warning as they are to start.

On the other hand, real contractions are pretty much the opposite of Braxton Hicks. Real contractions can be regularly timed, increase with intensity, and are most definitely painful as they progress.
Every woman is different, of course, but most women (myself included!) report real contractions to feel like the worst period cramps of your life rather than an abdominal tightening sensation.

Causes of Braxton Hicks Contractions

“Certain factors, like not drinking enough water throughout the day, or abdominal trauma as in a car accident, can trigger Braxton Hicks,” says Cooper. In addition, Braxton Hicks can be triggered by overexertion and even orgasm!
Before you throw your bag in the car and rush to the hospital, though, there are a couple of tricks you can try to test whether you’re experiencing Braxton Hicks contractions or the real deal.

  • Dehydration is a big trigger for Braxton Hicks. If you’re experiencing these practice contractions, first try drinking a big glass of water to see if they subside.
  • Sometimes you can experience Braxton Hicks if you’ve overdone it, say in a prenatal fitness class or just working around the house. If you feel that familiar tightening, take a break. Put your feet up, relax, and put on an episode of The Office.
  • Braxton Hicks can also be caused by a full bladder. If it’s been a while since you had a bathroom break, and you’re experiencing irregular contractions, take a pee break.
  • Sex can also trigger false contractions, since orgasm stimulates the uterus. Now, I don’t recommend you stop having sex (or orgasms!), but taking a short bath (30 minutes or less) after sex may help alleviate Braxton Hicks contractions.

Braxton Hicks Contractions and False Labor

Let’s recap: Typically, Braxton Hicks contractions are fairly painless, irregular, and can often be alleviated by drinking a glass of water or resting. But sometimes—especially as you near your due date—Braxton Hicks can mimic real contractions pretty darn well, which is known as false labor.
[pullquote align=”center”]“The onset of preterm labor can be subtle, and it is sometimes impossible to distinguish between normal uterine irritability, like Braxton Hicks, and true preterm labor without a physical exam or other tests.”
—Chase White, MD[/pullquote]
During false labor, your contractions may come more quickly, are more painful, and may even increase in intensity. White says the difference is that false labor can actually contribute to cervical ripening and dilation, which could lead to preterm labor.
“If you are still preterm (before 37 weeks) but the contractions are coming frequently (I use 4 or more contractions per hour as my threshold), it is essential that you speak to your OB-GYN and come in to be evaluated,” White cautions. “The onset of preterm labor can be subtle, and it is sometimes impossible to distinguish between normal uterine irritability, like Braxton Hicks, and true preterm labor without a physical exam or other tests.”
To determine whether you’re really in labor, your doctor will probably recommend that you bypass the office and head straight to the hospital. Once you’re there, you’ll get hooked up to a fetal monitor to check on baby, and you’ll probably have a cervical check to see if you’re dilated.
White prefers to think of these kinds of contractions as “early labor” when it occurs at term. He continues, “These regular contractions are not the disorganized uterine contractions that classically we call ‘Braxton Hicks.’ Rather, they are part of the preparation for active labor.  While they will sometimes abate on their own, sometimes they will become progressively more frequent and then transition into active labor.”

Braxton Hicks Q+A With Janelle Cooper, MD

I get Braxton Hicks every time I exercise. Should I stop working out?

“Exercise is great in pregnancy, but if you’re in pain, or having Braxton Hicks, you may want to stop at that time and consider a decrease in the intensity or length of your workouts going forward.”

Are you sure Braxton Hicks contractions don’t lead to labor?

“They don’t lead to labor. Think of Braxton Hicks as a dress rehearsal for labor.” The dress rehearsal comes before the show, but really, it’s just practice.

I know Braxton Hicks are supposed to be painless, but can they cause pelvic pain and cramping?

“Generally, they are painless. But they can be painful and may cause any discomforts of pregnancy (back pain, hip pain, vaginal pain or pressure) to amplify, resulting in additional pelvic pain and possibly cramping.”

Can you please tell my partner that frequent back rubs are proven to alleviate Braxton Hicks?

“Back rubs (or foot rubs) from a partner help to calm and soothe overall and may distract from the contractions, so I’d recommend trying it!”

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No Gym Required Sweat

How To Build A Bodyweight Workout, No Gym Membership Required

If you’re looking for a full-body workout that can be done anywhere, anytime, and requires no setup or equipment, you’re in luck.
We asked three fitness experts to share their tips on how to create a bodyweight workout plan that fits your schedule.

What is a bodyweight workout?

Before we get into the details about why you should be doing these awesome workouts, let’s define what a bodyweight workout is.
Bodyweight workouts consist of strength training moves that do not require equipment, such as dumbbells or machines. The moves can involve multiple muscle groups (squats) or isolate one or two smaller muscle groups (tricep dips).
A bodyweight workout can be aerobic, anaerobic, or both. It just depends on how you structure your routine (more on that later).

When should you do bodyweight workouts?

Typically, a bodyweight workout is done at a quicker pace than a workout done with weights. Plus, some bodyweight workouts have cardio bursts added to them to increase the intensity and calorie burn.
Like other forms of exercise, bodyweight workouts do stress your muscles. “So you will want proper rest for the muscle groups you work, as your muscle building actually happens during the rest period,” explains American College of Sports Medicine-certified personal trainer Jessica Hagestedt. Consider using this form of exercise three days per week (every other day) to start.
National Strength and Conditioning Association-certified strength and conditioning specialist Melody Schoenfeld says you can do bodyweight workouts any way that makes sense for your goals and abilities.
Bodyweight workouts can be done as a stand-alone workout or as part of a larger exercise routine. You can focus on specific muscle groups with certain movements, such as incorporating push-ups for an upper-body bodyweight routine, or you can stick to doing a full-body bodyweight routine as your main exercise for the day.
The amazing thing about bodyweight workouts, says Dempsey Marks, fitness expert and creator of the PreGame Fit fitness program, is that they can fit into nearly any fitness routine—and you’ll still be yielding benefits. “If you’re short on time, traveling, or don’t have access to a gym, bodyweight workouts alone are great for producing results,” she says.
“And if you’re looking to build a bit more muscle, I’d recommend a complete high-intensity bodyweight workout after some more traditional weightlifting at the gym. If you’re a runner, or simply just like your cardio, bodyweight workouts can be done before or after cardiovascular training,” says Marks.

What are the benefits of doing bodyweight exercises?

The list of benefits is endless, but our three experts agree that there are some that rise to the top.

  • Bodyweight workouts are portable—you can do them just about anywhere.
  • Bodyweight workouts are cost-effective (can be done for little or no cost).
  • Bodyweight workouts can incorporate plyometrics, strength training, and agility drills, which gives you both a strength and a cardiovascular workout.
  • Bodyweight workouts can include short cardio bursts to up the intensity.
  • Bodyweight workouts can incorporate circuit training, which is a series of exercises performed back to back with little to no rest in between for a higher calorie burn.

Create Your Own Bodyweight Workout

Creating a bodyweight workout is a lot easier than you might think. Schoenfeld says a bodyweight workout, just like any other workout, should be based on your current abilities, goals, and attention to form. If your goal is fat loss, she recommends using total body exercises (squats, lunges, push-ups, pull-ups, etc.) to have the greatest effect.
“For a total-body workout every time, make sure to include at least one pushing exercise, one pulling exercise, one squat- or lunge-type exercise, and one hip dominant exercise (one-legged or two-legged hip thrusts, for instance),” she explains.
Marks uses this simple formula with her clients: Create a circuit with one lower body exercise, one upper body exercise, one core exercise, and either a compound exercise or a plyometric explosive exercise (to get your heart rate up).
Once you decide on the format of your workout, Hagestedt recommends the following guidelines:

  • Make sure you warm up properly before any exercise.
  • Find a safe space to work in that has a sturdy object (like a wall) nearby for balance assistance.
  • Know what the exercise should look like before performing it; it’s helpful to do it in front of a mirror to make sure you are matching proper form and movement.
  • Start with a full-body routine with exercises that use major muscle groups, and write them down. It’s amazing how easy it is to forget the next exercise once you start to tire out.
  • Perform around 15 repetitions of each exercise and plan for 1 to 3 sets.
  • Base your initial workout on how you’re feeling or your rate of perceived exertion (REP).
  • Once your workout is complete, make sure you cool down, get your heart rate back to normal, and stretch each muscle group.

Bodyweight Workout for Beginners

This sample workout includes exercises for both the upper body and lower body. Follow the repetition and set guidelines above to determine the number of exercises to complete. If the exercise is for time, the amount to perform is at the end of the description.

Upper Body Circuit

Wide-Grip Push-ups

Lie facedown on the floor. Push yourself up into a push-up position with your hands about two to three inches wider than shoulder-width apart. Fully extend your elbows, pause at the top, and lower your body down to the starting position. Repeat.

Full Push-Up

Modified Push-Up

Triceps Bench Dip (Using Bench or Chair)

Sit on a bench or a sturdy chair and place your hands on either side of the hips so that the palms are resting on the bench and your fingers are hanging over the edge. Keep your feet together and your knees bent while you carefully move your buttocks off the bench—at this point, you will be supporting most of your bodyweight with your arms with your back facing the chair. Lower the hips toward the floor by bending the elbows until your upper arms are parallel to the floor. Push back up using your arms rather than your legs and repeat. To make it more challenging, perform the dip with the legs fully extended with no bend in the knees. Repeat.

 

One-Leg Push-Ups

Perform a push-up but extend one leg off of the ground so that it’s parallel with the floor. This adds some extra instability and recruits your abs for extra balance. Repeat.

 

Mountain Climbers

Get into a push-up position. With your hands in place, bring your right leg up and in (think of running in place but in a push-up position). Extend your right leg back and do the same movement with your left leg. As soon as you have the movement down, pick up the pace and repeat, alternating with both legs for 20 to 30 seconds.

Bicycle Crunches

Lie flat on the floor and place your hands behind your head. Bring your knees up to a tabletop position. This is your starting position. Bring your right knee into your body and angle toward your left elbow (you can touch your knee to elbow). Then straighten out the right leg, square your shoulders, and do the same thing for the left leg (left knee to right elbow). 

Once you feel comfortable with this movement, pick up the pace, alternating between your right and left leg.

Plank

Get into a push-up position. Now bend your elbows and rest your forearms on the floor. This is your starting position. Your feet should be flexed with your toes on the floor. Your body should be a few inches off the floor in a straight line. Make sure to contract your abdominals and lower back muscles while holding the exercise. 

Lower Body Circuit

When performing squats, it is essential to have proper form to avoid injury and reap maximum results. Remember to keep your heels anchored and not to let your knees go past your toes.

Narrow Stance Squat Jumps Superset With Wide Stance Squat Jumps

Assume a squat position, with your legs shoulder-width apart. Now, bend your knees and lower yourself into a squat position. Explode up, raising your feet off the floor a few inches. Your arms can be out in front of you or at your sides. As you come back down, make sure to land softly into a squat position. You can keep repeating the movement this way or alternate between a narrow stance (a little less than shoulder width) and a wide stance (slightly wider than shoulder width). Repeat.

Narrow Stance


Wide Stance


Sumo Squats

Get in a squat position. Step each leg out until you’re in a wide stance with your toes turned out. If you’re not using weight, your hands can be on your hips. If you decide to use weight, you can hold a kettlebell with both hands or a dumbbell in each hand (close together) in front of your body while squatting down. Pause at the bottom and stand back up. Repeat.


Walking Lunges

Find an area that has a long stretch of floor (a hallway works great). Stand with your feet together and hands on your hips. Starting with your right foot, step forward into a lunge position. Now, bring your left foot forward and step into a lunge position. Alternate legs and walk for the desired amount of time or number of reps per leg.

Glute Bridges

Lie faceup on the floor with your knees bent and your heels on the floor. Raise your hips so your body forms a straight line from your shoulders to your knees. Hold this position for three to five seconds and return to the starting position. Repeat. 

Wall Sits

Stand facing away from a wall with feet positioned 6 to 12 inches away from the wall. While keeping your back against the wall, bend the knees and lower the body until thighs are parallel to the floor. Hold this position for up to 30 seconds. Return to the starting position by pushing the heels into the floor and sliding the back up against the wall. 

How can you make bodyweight exercises more difficult?

If you stop feeling challenged by your bodyweight workout, it’s time to up the intensity. There are several ways to do this. Hagestedt recommends adding more complicated exercises, increasing your workout repetitions and/or sets, or adding resistance bands and/or dynamic plyometrics for an increased cardiovascular twist.
One example of a simple bodyweight move you can make more challenging is the push-up. “If you’ve mastered the push-up, you might try plyometric push-ups, which can be done in place (push hard off the floor so that you’re essentially ‘jumping’ with your hands) or onto a higher surface (so aiming to land your hands on a step after ‘jumping’ off the ground),” says Schoenfeld.
Marks says a simple option to make workouts and exercises harder is to eliminate rest. “Create a circuit, set a timer for seven minutes, and complete the circuit as many times as possible with little to no rest in between over the course of seven minutes,” she says.
“Plyometrics (like jump squats, jump lunges, speed skaters) are challenging and a wonderful way to get your heart rate up so that you’re burning extra calories during your workout. If you’d like to make the exercises themselves harder, utilize resistance bands or some light dumbbells (or even soup cans!) to really strengthen your muscles,” adds Marks.

Categories
Health x Body Wellbeing

Emergency Contraception Facts Every Woman Needs To Know

Let me just make a few things clear right out of the gate. Accidents happen. It’s hard to remember to take a daily birth control pill, much less remember to take it at the same time each day. Condoms can break. You may have miscalculated your fertile time if you’re practicing natural family planning.
There are about a thousand different reasons you might need emergency contraception, and there are approximately zero reasons you should feel bad about purchasing it.
Even though some forms of emergency contraception have been available without a prescription for over a decade, misinformation about emergency contraception abounds. So, with the help of emergency contraception experts, we’re here to help set the record straight.
Here are the emergency contraception facts every woman (and frankly, every man) needs to know.

How Emergency Contraception Works

Emergency contraception can help prevent unintended pregnancy in a couple of different ways.
One of the most popular forms of emergency contraception is the morning after pill, which delivers a large dose of hormones designed to delay or prevent ovulation from happening. If you don’t ovulate, there’s no egg to be fertilized, meaning you can’t get pregnant.
Another method of preventing pregnancy through emergency contraception is through a copper IUD. Essentially, copper is toxic to sperm. So, when sperm try to swim toward their goal, the copper in your cervical mucus from the IUD kills the sperm.

How Emergency Contraception Works With Your Menstrual Cycle

Here’s a quick refresher on the menstrual cycle:
“Most women have a menstrual cycle that lasts around 28 days from the start of one period to the start of the next (a few are longer and some are shorter in length),” explains Melissa Grant, chief operating officer of carafem Health. “On average, most fertile women ovulate around day 14 of this cycle, meaning they release one egg cell during this time, and it survives about one day. If a fertile man’s sperm comes into contact with a woman’s reproductive tract (through the vagina, cervix, and uterus to the fallopian tubes) the sperm cells can live in her body for up to five days. This means even if a woman does not have sex on the day she ovulates, it is still possible for sperm and egg to join in conception if live sperm are still in her reproductive tract on the day she ovulates.”
This window of opportunity for pregnancy to occur is why Adeeti Gupta, MD, the founder of Walk In GYN Care, cautions women that while emergency contraception pills do work to prevent pregnancy, it’s hard for most women to accurately pinpoint their exact ovulation date to know whether or not they may become pregnant. “The menstrual cycle is helpful [in preventing pregnancy] only if your cycles are regular like clock work,” says Gupta. “However, this should not be used a gauge to decide when and whether or not you need to take emergency contraception.”
So, to recap: If you have unprotected sex around the time that you normally ovulate, you are at risk of becoming pregnant, even if it wasn’t on the exact day of ovulation.

When to Use Emergency Contraception

Luckily, there’s no guesswork involved in knowing when you should take emergency contraception.
“Emergency contraception can be used any time there is unprotected intercourse, unless you are already on birth control pills or have an IUD,” Gupta explains.
According to both Grant and Gupta, you can take emergency contraception at any time during your menstrual cycle and any time that you’re worried you might become pregnant after sex.
Even though most kinds of emergency contraception, like Plan B, are typically effective within 72 hours of intercourse (and others are effective for longer periods), both Grant and Gupta urge women to act quickly after unprotected sex to prevent an unintended pregnancy, and they say the claims that emergency contraception is as effective on day one as it is on day five isn’t completely true.
“It is variable. The efficacy also depends on the woman’s menstrual cycle, so it’s hard to predict,” Gupta says.
Still, research shows that all forms of emergency contraception should be taken as soon as possible after unprotected sex in order to be most effective.
And, if you were worried, this means that emergency contraception is not the same as having an abortion. I repeat: emergency contraception is NOT an abortion.
And if you’ve heard differently or are still unsure, take it from the expert:
“An abortion ends an established pregnancy,” explains Grant. “Emergency contraception pills work to prevent ovulation and have no effect on an ongoing pregnancy.”

Purchasing Emergency Contraception: A Guide

Now that you know the key facts about emergency contraception, here’s what you need to know about the most popular forms of emergency contraception available and how to purchase them.

The Morning After Pill

The “morning after pill” is a term that describes a couple different forms of emergency contraception pills. This type of emergency contraception contains hormones that help prevent ovulation.

Levonorgestrel

Levonorgestrel is a type of progestin, one of the hormones that affects your menstrual cycle and pregnancy.
Most levonorgestrel emergency contraception options, like Plan B One Step (one of the most popular name-brand types of levonorgestrel emergency contraception), are single-dose options that are most effective when they are taken as soon after intercourse as possible.
Levonorgestrel Effectiveness
When taken within 72 hours, levonorgestrel is 89 percent effective in preventing pregnancy. However, efficacy rates decline the longer you wait to take the pill; by day five, you’re five times more likely to become pregnant.
You should know that some research has shown that the morning after pill is slightly less effective in women with higher BMIs. In fact, one study showed that in women with high BMIs, pregnancy was three times more likely to occur despite using emergency contraception; if you have a BMI greater than 25, it’s recommended that you do not take levonorgestrel. If you have a high BMI, don’t despair: The two other methods of emergency birth control are shown to be more effective overall, even if you have a higher BMI.
Levonorgestrel Side Effects
Because levonorgestrel is a large dose of hormones, it’s normal to experience nausea or even vomiting as a side effect. If you do vomit after taking the morning after pill, Gupta advises following up with a second dose. Other common side effects are similar to how you feel during PMS: bloating, fatigue, breast tenderness, and cramping have all been reported.
Where to Buy Plan B One Step
Plan B (and generic forms of it) can be found in the family planning aisle of most drugstores, so anyone age 17 or older can purchase it without asking the pharmacist or having a prescription. That means your partner, your best friend, or a stranger on the street could purchase the morning after pill for you, no questions asked. You can also buy the morning after pill online through most retail pharmacies, but be aware that shipping times vary, and you may not receive the pill within 72 hours when it is likely to be most effective.

ella (Ulipristal Acetate)

Ulipristal acetate, known on the market as ella, is another type of morning after pill. Ulipristal acetate is a progesterone receptor modulator. Gupta explains that ella also works to delay ovulation, “but works through a different mechanism of action. It goes into the cells and blocks the progesterone receptor to prevent progesterone surges and hopefully ovulation.”
Ella Effectiveness
One of the best things about ella is that it can also be taken up to five days after intercourse, but unlike levonorgestrel-only pills, has even rates of efficacy as time goes on.
In addition, ella has been shown to be more effective in women with higher BMIs, but not failsafe. In one study of over 2000 women, a total of 1.9 percent became pregnant after using ulipristal acetate, but among obese women in the study, the rate of pregnancy while using this form of emergency contraception jumped to 8.3 percent.
Ella Side Effects
Side effects of ella are similar to the side effects of other morning after pills on the market. You may experience symptoms similar to those during PMS, but they should subside after a couple of days.
Where to Buy ella
Ella is currently only available with a prescription, but that usually doesn’t require a visit to your doctor. Usually, your physician can simply call the prescription in to your pharmacy, and in some states, you can even get the prescription straight from the pharmacist. With a prescription, ella can be ordered online and shipped to most states.

Copper IUD

A copper IUD is the most effective form of emergency contraception at 99 percent efficacy up to 120 hours of insertion, regardless of BMI. Plus, unlike the morning after pill, a copper IUD can continue to act as birth control, preventing pregnancy for five to ten years or until you decide to have the device removed.
It only takes about five minutes to insert a copper IUD, and the experience is about as uncomfortable as having a pap smear or colposcopy. A speculum is inserted into the vagina, and then your doctor will use a special tool to place the IUD into your uterus.
Copper is toxic to sperm, so they prevent fertilization of an egg from taking place. Even if you ovulate, the IUD prevents implantation by impairing sperm motility.

How much does emergency contraception cost?

The Affordable Care Act requires insurers to cover FDA-approved contraception methods (thanks, Obama!). That includes emergency contraception, but there are restrictions, so your insurance may or may not cover the cost of emergency contraception. The best way to find out if your insurance covers emergency contraception is to call them directly.
If you go with the morning after pill, like Plan B, which can be purchased at any pharmacy, you’ll likely be paying out of pocket, though insurance may cover some of the cost. Generic brands of levonorgestrel-only emergency contraception have the same rates of efficacy, but are generally a little bit cheaper. You can also save money by visiting the Plan B website directly, as they usually offer online coupons that can be redeemed in stores. Since ella requires a prescription, insurance is more likely to cover all or a portion of the $50 cost.
The best bet for insurance-covered emergency contraception is the IUD, since it requires an in-office doctor’s visit. Without insurance, an IUD can be pretty expensive (think between $500 and $1,000), but insurance brings that cost down considerably.
If you need emergency contraception, but money is tight, you do have options. Visit your local health department or Planned Parenthood to find out about your options for receiving free or low-cost emergency contraception.

I found out I am pregnant after I took emergency contraception. Will it hurt the baby?

Sometimes women find they’re pregnant despite taking emergency contraception. This might be because ovulation had already occured when you took emergency contraception, or the emergency contraception may have been taken incorrectly.
Copper IUDs are 99 percent effective at preventing pregnancy, but while it is extremely rare, pregnancy can occur if the IUD malfunctions or was inserted incorrectly. Even more rare are adverse outcomes if you do become pregnant with an IUD. That said, studies have shown that the risk of ectopic pregnancy and miscarriage are much higher in women who become pregnant with an IUD in place.
That’s not the case with other forms of emergency contraception, though. If you find out you’re pregnant after taking emergency contraception, research has shown that the morning after pill likely has little effect on fetal development.
In fact, a 2009 study of over 600 women in China found that there were no statistical increases in the risk of miscarriage or other adverse pregnancy outcomes when women were exposed to levonorgestrel-only emergency contraception after becoming pregnant.
This may be because most OTC emergency contraception contain high levels of common hormones similar to pregnancy hormones like progesterone. So how can progesterone both promote and prevent pregnancy?
“Yes, progesterone is one of the hormones that surges during pregnancy,” Gupta says. “However, if we give that hormone from external sources [like emergency contraception] then it works through a mechanism called feedback suppression and suppresses ovulation.”
Basically, progestin is a synthetic hormone used in emergency contraception that mimics progesterone but is manufactured to act on the bodies progesterone receptors in a desired way, which is the feedback suppression Gupta mentioned. Grant further explains, “One effect of the type of progestin in emergency contraceptive pills is to inhibit ovulation (stop the release of an egg cell). The most commonly available emergency contraception pill in the United States contains the progestin levonorgestrel.”

Frequently Asked Questions About Emergency Contraception

You asked, we asked the experts, they answered.

Does emergency contraception prevent STDs?

“No, emergency contraception does not prevent STDs,” says Grant. If you have unprotected sex, it’s always a good idea to get tested, just in case.

Is it safe to use emergency contraception more than once?

“Yes, emergency contraception is very safe, and can be used as needed,” says Grant. Unless you throw up immediately after taking the morning after pill, there’s no need to follow up with a second dose. Any time you have unprotected sex and are concerned about pregnancy, you may take emergency contraception.

Can you use emergency contraception as regular birth control?

“No, not at all,” says Gupta. “I do not recommend this method on a routine basis because it can cause irregular periods and high chance of unwanted pregnancy.”

Are you sure that emergency contraception isn’t the same as the abortion pill?

“Yes! They have completely different compositions,” Gupta explains. “Ella is similar in chemical composition but it’s used differently and at a different dose for abortion.”

Will emergency contraception affect my menstrual cycle?

Maybe. “Emergency contraception can sometimes delay the cycle and cause unpredictable bleeding in the subsequent cycles,” says Gupta.

Does emergency contraception hurt?

“No,” says Gupta. “You may get some cramps, but it shouldn’t hurt too much.” See the side effects above so you know what to expect!

Is it safe to use emergency contraception if I recently started hormonal birth control?

“Yes, if your hormonal birth control is not yet effective and there is a risk of ovulation, emergency contraception pills can be a good way to further reduce the risk of an unintended pregnancy,” Grant explains.

If you take two morning after pills is it twice as effective?

Sorry, but nope. Plus, according to Grant, “The effectiveness of taking more than one EC pill has not been widely studied. Current recommendations are to follow the package directions.”

My period started right after I had unprotected sex. Do I still need emergency contraception?

“Some women bleed in the middle of a menstrual cycle and others may ovulate even during a period,” Grant explains. “If you have had unprotected sex and want greater protection from pregnancy, you can take emergency contraception pills at any time during your cycle.”

I feel HORRIBLE after taking emergency contraception. When should I call my doctor?

You shouldn’t feel bad after taking emergency contraception. If you do, Gupta says, “Call or go the nearest GYN office/ER right away. Your doctor needs to rule out pregnancy, ectopic pregnancy, or anything else that may be serious.”

Does emergency contraception affect fertility?

According to Grant, “Emergency contraception pills only prevent ovulation at the time you take them. They do not offer long-term protection against pregnancy, and they do not impact future fertility.”

Should I feel bad about using emergency contraception?

“The choice about when and whether to become pregnant or have children is one that is best decided by the people involved,” Grant says. “Having children when you feel ready is something to feel good about!”

Categories
No Gym Required Sweat

Cardio Workouts: The Benefits, Different Types, And How To Get Started

We’ve probably all heard that cardio is good for you, and in turn envisioned long, torturous sessions on the treadmill (also known as the dreadmill).
In short, yes, cardio is good (read: really good) for you—and it’s so much more than just monotonous workouts on a single machine! That said, not all cardio is created equal. Some types are more effective at burning fat, some are great for building strength, and others can boost your overall fitness in a low-impact way.
These nuances are why it’s important to a) fully understand what defines cardio and b) consider your fitness goals when deciding which type of cardio is right for you. We asked four health and fitness experts to help break down the details for us. We’ll also share a cardio workout you can do at the gym and a cardio workout you can do at home—no equipment necessary.

What is a cardio workout?

In very general terms, a cardio workout is anything that challenges the heart and lungs, says Michael Jonesco, DO, assistant professor of internal and sports medicine at the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center in Columbus. In other words, any movement that brings your heart rate above baseline level and increases your body’s demand for oxygen qualifies as cardio.
Typically (but not always), cardio involves movement that is repetitive and ranges in intensity from mild to moderate to high. Walking can be cardio. So can jogging, dancing, jumping rope, and biking.
But cardio doesn’t always require gym clothes or machinery. “You can do cardio by walking up and down the stairs in your office or walking around the grocery store,” explains Jonesco.
Essentially, any physical activity—as long as it leaves you huffing and puffing (even slightly) and in need of more oxygen—is cardio.

What are the benefits of cardio workouts?

The health benefits of cardio are legit—and numerous—says Jonesco, including improved respiration and lung functioning, increased cardiovascular functioning (“the heart becomes more capable of pumping more blood with less squeeze,” Jonesco explains), improved circulation, increased total number of red blood cells (which boost the delivery of oxygen to the rest of your body), reduced risk of heart disease, reduced blood pressure, reduced risk of diabetes, weight loss and weight maintenance, muscle strengthening, and improved muscle recovery (i.e. how quickly your muscles recover after being stressed).
Still with us? Good—because that’s not all.
There are also serious mental health benefits, including improved cognitive functioning, improved mood, reduced stress, and reduced risk of depression, adds Jonesco.
On top of all that, doing cardio on the reg will improve your ability to move through daily life more easily and efficiently, says Sergio Rojas, an Iowa-based certified strength and conditioning specialist, functional movement specialist, and USANA associate. By building a stronger cardiovascular system, you won’t get tired doing everyday things like lifting heavy items or walking up the stairs, Rojas explains. Basically, more cardio equals an easier, more enjoyable day-to-day life.

What are the different types of cardio workouts?

There are many different types of cardio, Jonesco explains. You can break it down by the specific type of exercise—for example swimming, running, bodyweight exercises, and so on—but it’s probably more helpful to think of it in terms of intensity level. Low to moderate cardio is any type of movement that elevates your heart rate to between 50 to 75 percent of your max heart rate, and high intensity cardio is anything that brings you to 75 percent and above max heart rate. (Calculate your max heart rate by subtracting your age from 220. For example, a 40-year-old’s max heart rate would be 180.)
Another way to think about it (without busting out a heart rate monitor): Low to moderate intensity cardio involves anything that elevates your heart rate without leaving you completely breathless, says Stephanie Mansour, Chicago-based certified personal trainer and weight-loss coach. Activities like walking, light jogging, and moderate biking fall into this category.
High-intensity cardio, which involves more physically demanding bursts of movement, will leave you noticeably out of breath. The fitness method known as high-intensity interval training (HIIT) is a popular form of high-intensity cardio (more on HIIT below).
Although lower intensity cardio burns fat less efficiently than higher intensity cardio, it does burn fat more directly, says Jonesco, which means you can see weight loss and maintenance benefits from lower intensity cardio. This type of workout also tends to be lower impact—that is, easier on your joints—which means you’re less likely to injure yourself.
“If you want to reduce stress, feel better, and lubricate your joints, do this type of cardio,” says Mansour.
On the other hand, high-intensity cardio workouts are “really good for weight loss” and changing your body composition, says Mansour. That’s because they burn more calories in a shorter amount of time and are more likely to increase your muscle mass, which boosts your resting metabolic rate (AKA your metabolism), an important factor in weight loss and maintenance. Another plus: If your workout is weight-bearing (which is the case with many higher intensity cardio workouts), it can increase your bone density and lower your risk of developing osteoporosis later in life, says Jonesco.
Lastly, there are strength training workouts with cardio components. These types of workouts—think a weightlifting circuit with jump rope and jogging thrown in—are also great for changing your body composition (i.e. reducing fat and building muscle), says Mansour.

How much cardio should I do?

How many minutes of cardio you should do per week depends on the intensity of your cardio workouts.
If you are doing more vigorous (i.e. high intensity) cardio, you can get these benefits by doing just 75 minutes a week, says Jonesco. If you are doing more mild to moderate cardio, around 150 minutes a week is ideal.
[pullquote align=”center”]“Cardio fitness is a marathon, not a sprint. Too much too soon can result in injuries and mental burnout.”
—Michael Jonesco[/pullquote]
Just know this: With low to moderate cardio exercise, you’ll need to keep at it for about 15 to 20 minutes at a time before you’d significantly increase your demand for oxygen, says Jonesco. When it comes to higher intensity work, you can see benefits in 5 to 10 minutes.

What’s the best type of cardio for me?

Jonesco says that the first step is to find what you enjoy doing. That way, you are more likely to stick with it—and you’ll have fun doing it!

“Cardio fitness is a marathon, not a sprint,” Jonesco adds. “Too much too soon can result in injuries and mental burnout.”
So take it slow in the beginning. Jonesco also says if you are very new to physical activity, overweight, and/or have a chronic comorbidity, like diabetes, it’s smart and safe to start with low to moderate intensity cardio.
He recommends starting gradually.  Although 150 minutes of cardio a week is a great target amount, you don’t need to achieve that in week one. “You can begin with 50 minutes knowing that each week you want to increase it 10 to 15 minutes as your body tolerates it.”
If you’re a step beyond beginner status and considering HIIT, Jonesco says that when it comes to burning body fat and working major muscles in both your lower and upper body, HIIT is very efficient. But that doesn’t mean it should be your only form of exercise. “I recommend it one to two times a week, tops,” says Jonesco. “It’s a great workout, especially if you don’t have much time, but it’s not a starting zone.” Another caveat: “For most of us, as we age, it may be too high impact for our bodies to tolerate,” Jonesco adds.
Amanda Shannon Verrengia, Pittsburgh-based certified personal trainer and run coach, says that running a lot and incorporating HIIT routines twice a week are her go-to cardio workouts. In general, you’ll be best served with a combination plan like hers that incorporates different types of cardio, she explains, because this variety challenges your body and heart rate in different ways. Ultimately, this variety ups your fitness faster than just doing the same type of exercise—like running, for example—over and over.
That said, Verrengia advises working within your own level of fitness. “People can get overzealous, especially with HIIT,” she explains. Pushing yourself too much, too soon could cause you to sacrifice good form for the sake of hitting an arbitrary number of repetitions or a certain number of minutes. Poor form at high intensity equals greater risk of injury. That’s why it’s important to learn how to do exercises correctly and safely before amping up the intensity and speed.
Remember to always, always take a rest day, says Verrengia. “You shouldn’t work your body seven days a week.”  She recommends working out five to six days a week, with two to three days of high-intensity work and two to three days of moderate intensity work.

What should I know before starting a cardio routine?

When it comes to incorporating more cardio in your routine, “start wherever you’re at,” advises Rojas. Yes, it’s great if you can meet the recommended amount of 30 minutes a day, five days a week, but if you’re brand new to cardio and juggling an already-packed schedule, try for 10 one-minute movements throughout the day, Rojas suggests. Small, repeated bursts of movement—like a quick jump rope session or a short jog from your office to the car—can spur long-term changes that equal big results.
“You just have to find the type of movement that you enjoy,” says Rojas. The beauty of cardio is that there are so many types of movements to choose from, so with some experimentation and creativity, you can find several (or many) types of cardio that work for you.
“The more variety the better,” says Rojas of his recommended approach to cardio. “If you have asymmetries in the body, repetitive movement will create more imbalances.” That’s why it’s important to do multiple types of cardio at varying intensities.
If you’re just beginning a cardio routine, you’ll likely feel fatigued and perhaps a bit sore at first. That’s perfectly normal, says Jonesco. But it’s not normal to feel sore for more than two to three days or to feel an isolated soreness in your joints, ligaments, or tendons. These are red flags that indicate you likely pushed yourself too hard, says Rojas, and you should back off accordingly and see a doctor if you suspect an injury.

A Great Cardio Workout For the Gym

You can get in a great cardio workout at your gym—no fancy machinery required—in just 15 to 20 minutes. This particular workout, recommended by Rojas, is low to moderate intensity cardio. You can do this type of cardio three to four days a week.
The workout is a circuit combining standard gym machines and an on-the-ground exercise. Here are the components.

  • Treadmill/Elliptical: Depending on your fitness level, you’ll be walking, jogging, or running on the treadmill or elliptical. The elliptical is lower impact on your joints than the treadmill, so if you have any previous or current knee issues, opt for this machine. Your effort level should be between 4 and 6 on a scale of 1 to 10, so pick your speed/incline accordingly.
  • Bike: You can use either a recumbent bike, which is lower to the ground and has a full chair supporting your back, or a stationary exercise bike, which looks like the type of bike you’d ride outside, but is fixed in place. Your effort level should be between 4 and 6 on a scale of 1 to 10, so pick your speed/incline accordingly.
  • Side Skaters: This on-the-ground exercise involves side-to-side movements (AKA movements in the lateral plane of motion), explains Rojas. Start standing up with your feet hip-distance apart. Bend your knees and press your hips back slightly. Jump about one foot to the left, landing on your left leg and bringing your right leg behind your left ankle, letting it hover a few inches above the ground. Your knees should be slightly bent, your butt and core should be squeezed and your hips should be pushed back several inches. Pause for a moment and then jump to the right with your right leg, bringing your left leg back behind you. This is one rep.

For a full workout, perform these moves in a circuit. You’ll do the following sequence twice.

  • Treadmill for 2 minutes
  • Bike for 2 minutes
  • Treadmill for 2 minutes
  • Side skaters for 2 minutes
  • Treadmill at incline (greater than 1.0) for 2 minutes

Rest for 1 minute and repeat again.

A Great Cardio Workout To Try At Home—No Equipment Required

If you’re strapped for time or don’t have a gym membership, you can still get in a great cardio workout at home using minimal space, your bodyweight, and common household items as stand-ins for weight room equipment. This particular workout, recommended by Mansour, combines HIIT, strength training, and cardio for a heart-pumping, fat-burning, and muscle-building sweat sesh.
“I love this workout because it’s efficient cardio that works your muscles without completely fatiguing you,” Mansour says. Because this workout is high intensity, you should do it no more than one to two times a week in combination with other workouts of lower impact and lower to moderate intensity (like the gym workout above).
Here are the exercises you’ll do in the circuit.

  • Running/Jogging in Place: You’ll alternate between a slow and fast pace. The intention here is to warm up your muscles and elevate your heart rate. If you have knee pain, Mansour recommends alternate between walking and speed walking. Although your legs will be the major movers, don’t forget your arms. Pump them in big swings as you walk, jog, or run to get your ticker beating even faster.
  • Squats: This lower-body exercise is great for building stronger glutes (AKA butt muscles), quads, hamstrings, and calves. Start in a standing position with your feet several inches wider than hip-distance apart. Squeeze your butt, bend your knees and push your hips back and down as if you were going to lower yourself into a chair. Make sure your knees don’t extend beyond your toes. Pause for a moment at the bottom of the movement, and then press through your heels to push yourself back up to standing. This is one squat. If you feel wobbly during the movement, stand next to a chair or other piece of furniture and lightly rest one hand on top for balance. If you have a history of knee pain or are worried about your knees for any reason, Mansour advises squatting just halfway to reduce the pressure on your joints.

  • Bicep Curls: This upper-body move will strengthen your biceps. You can use 3- to 5-pound dumbbells or a number of weighted household items like water bottles, gallons of milk, jugs of laundry detergent, or even grocery bags filled with items. You’ll need two identical (or similar) weights—one for each hand. Start in a standing position with your feet hip-distance apart and your arms by your side. Grab the weights comfortably in each hand and, keeping your elbows hugged into the side of your body, slowly curl the weights up to your shoulders, pause for a moment at the top and then slowly lower them back down until your arms are straight by your sides again. This is one rep.
  • Lunges: This move targets the same muscles as a squat. You’ll start standing up with your feet hip-distance apart. Step your right foot forward about two feet and bend both knees to lower yourself down until your back knee is hovering just a few inches above the ground. Your right knee should be directly above your right ankle, and as with the squat, your knee should not extend beyond the toes of your right foot. Pause for a moment at the bottom of the movement, then press down through the heel of your right foot to push yourself back up to standing. This is one rep. If you have trouble balancing, lightly rest one hand on the top of a chair or other piece of furniture.
  • Side Extensions: The second upper-body move in this sequence, side extensions, targets your shoulders and deltoids (the muscles on the uppermost part of your arms and the top each shoulder). Grab your weights again (one in each hand) and start by standing up straight, feet hip-distance apart with your arms down by your sides and your palms facing your body. Extend your arms straight out to the sides and slowly lift them up as high as your shoulders. Pause for a moment at the top of the movement, then slowly lower your arms back down until they are straight by your sides again. This is one rep. As you perform the lifts, keep a soft bend in your knees and squeeze your core muscles. If the movements hurt your neck and/or your shoulders get locked, reduce the distance of your lift by half.

For a full workout, perform these moves in a circuit. You’ll repeat the following sequence three times.

  • 3 minutes of running/jogging in place or jumping jacks, slowly for 30 seconds, followed by 30 seconds moving as fast as you can, repeated 3 times
  • 30-second rest
  • 10 squats
  • 30-second rest
  • 10 bicep curls
  • 30-second rest
  • 20 lunges (10 on each leg)
  • 30-second rest
  • 10 side extensions
  • 30-second rest

The Bottom Line

With its impressively long list of physical and mental health benefits, cardio should play a role—a significant role—in your exercise routine. Unless you have certain injuries and/or other prohibiting health conditions, you should mix it up with varying types of cardio at varying intensities to reap the benefits that cardio workouts have to offer. The best part: You don’t need tons of time, space, equipment, or expertise to get a quality cardio workout—you just need a positive attitude and a willingness to get a little (or a lot) sweaty.

Categories
Favorite Finds Nosh

5 Edible Flowers To Try For Cooking, Baking, And Cocktail-Making

Thirty years ago, flowers were everywhere thanks to the influence of major cultural touchstones like fashion brand Laura Ashley and Donna Martin’s entire wardrobe in early seasons of Beverly Hills 90210. However, the floral trend wasn’t confined to the world of fashion. Edible flowers became a symbol of sophisticated haute cuisine; salads were strewn with violets and pansies while white wine spritzers were chilled with ice cubes containing suspended flower petals. Thankfully, along with all things floral and all things from the early ’90s, edible flowers are making a comeback!
Whether this is your first experience with the edible flower trend or it’s familiar territory, we’ll teach you how to buy and safely use flowers for cooking, baking, and cocktail-making.

Safety First: Buying and Selecting Edible Flowers

First things first: It’s important to buy flowers from reputable, organic farms and greenhouses specializing in edible flowers to ensure you’re consuming a product free from harmful pesticides and herbicides. Resist the urge to snip flowers from store-bought bouquets (there’s a good chance they’ve been sprayed with pesticides) and even from your own backyard (where there’s a chance the flowers may have inadvertently been exposed to pesticides).
Jan Billington, co-owner of Maddocks Farm Organics, an organic farm specializing in fresh edible flowers, is a firm believer in purchasing edible flowers from specialty farms for the taste alone. In particular, she loves the standout flavor of edible roses:
“Organic edible roses are a world apart from the insipid supermarket offering, which have no perfume and should most definitely not be eaten because the average florist rose has been sprayed up to 90 times with some very toxic chemicals. We grow the finest David Austin roses, and they all smell wonderful and all taste different. Some are sold to make chocolates; some [are sold for] jam, and we have just started working with a lovely little Cornish couple called Tinkture to make a rose gin. It is made with fresh rose petals, and the flavor is wonderful,” Billington tells HealthyWay.
Another advantage to buying edible flowers from specialty growers is the reduced risk of accidentally buying flowers that are inedible and/or poisonous. A 2017 article in The Guardian, “Tasty or toxic? Beware of the trend for edible flowers,” highlights the ways in which social media can inadvisably and accidentally promote the use of toxic flowers (narcissi, a beautiful flower that can cause painful sores and swelling, were used as an example). For more information on what to avoid, check out this list of 20 poisonous flowers.

Where to Buy Edible Flowers

Buying edible flowers from licensed growers will almost guarantee your flowers have been grown without the use of harmful pesticides in a sustainable, controlled environment. If you’re fortunate enough to live close to an edible flower farm you can actually visit the facilities and in some cases, pick your own flowers. Luckily, for those of us not in driving distance of an edible flower farm, there are still several options for ordering flowers online.
For a random assortment of fresh, hydroponically grown edible flowers, we love Melissa’s Assorted Edible Flowers (which uses next day air shipping in the U.S.).
If you’re in the United Kingdom, Maddocks Farm Organics will ship organic, fresh edible flowers via overnight courier.
Gourmet Sweet Botanicals specializes in fresh and crystalized edible flowers and will ship anywhere in the U.S. (and in Canada on certain days of the week) using FedEx Priority Overnight or UPS Next Day Air.

Using Edible Flowers in the Kitchen

Edible flowers are so much more than a garnish; preliminary research suggests some could be potentially rich sources of polyphenols and antioxidants, and they can be used to make tasty infusions, added to salads and other delicate dishes, or served as special ingredients in their own right.

“I love it when edible flowers are used as an ingredient within a recipe rather than just as a garnish on the side of the plate,” Billington says. “There are so many different flavors within the edible flower world, and this is often overlooked by chefs.”
If you want to explore the various flavors of edible flowers, try one of our top-five faves.

5 Beautiful (and Tasty!) Edible Flowers to Try

Rose Petals

Regularly used in Middle Eastern cooking, rose petals have a pleasant floral smell and taste. Use dried or fresh rose petals in your favorite gin-based cocktail, in this recipe for homemade harissa, or try them as a cute vegan topping for any dairy-free dessert!

Chive Blossoms

Chive blossoms are small purple flowers that have a faint, slightly sweet chive flavor. Use chive blossoms in a delicate salad with microgreens or try Billington’s favorite method. “Cutting chive flowers and steeping them in a white wine or white balsamic vinegar makes the most beautiful pink onion-flavored vinegar,” Billington says, “which is wonderful in salad dressing, and also extremely good for you.”

Violet Petals

Fresh violets add a gorgeous pop of purple to any salad or cocktail (an especially nice feature, as there are very few naturally-colored purple ingredients one can use to complement a green salad). The lightly perfumed taste of violets pairs well with sparkling wines such as prosecco and cava; try floating a single violet on top of the wine before serving.

Zucchini Blossoms

With their soft orange and yellow color, zucchini (or squash) blossoms taste like a milder version of summer squash. Zucchini blossoms are particularly delicious when they’ve been stuffed with delicate ricotta cheese and then gently pan-fried in olive oil or butter. For a gorgeous yet simple side dish, zucchini blossoms can be quickly sautéed and served with crème fraiche-spiked scrambled eggs.

Lavender

Lavender has a distinct, soapy taste that can quickly overpower all other flavors if it isn’t used judiciously. When used with a light touch, the taste of lavender is similar to that of mint and rosemary. Use small amounts of dried lavender in dough for cookies and scones, whipped into cream and butter, or as part of a dry rub for lamb and goat meat.
Now that you know which edible flowers are safe to consume, try using them yourself in this recipe for cold brew hibiscus flower iced tea.
Delightfully tangy and refreshing, homemade hibiscus tea (also called Agua de Jamaica, rosella, or sorrel depending on where you’re drinking it) is an easy way to enjoy the taste of edible flowers with very little effort. Dried hibiscus flowers can be purchased in Latin and Caribbean grocery stores, from greenhouses specializing in edible flowers, or online (we love these organic dried hibiscus flowers from Frontier Co-op). Unlike traditional iced tea, hibiscus tea doesn’t contain any strong bitter flavors and is free from caffeine (in fact, you’ll find cold brewed hibiscus tea tastes more like cranberry juice than tea).
This is a basic recipe for cold brew hibiscus flower tea, so for additional flavor try steeping slices of fresh ginger, cinnamon sticks, or fresh mint leaves with the hibiscus flowers. If you plan on serving this tea to guests, try doubling the recipe and making elegant hibiscus flower tea ice cubes with the extra liquid.

Cold Brew Hibiscus Flower Iced Tea

Yield: 4 Cups of Cold Brew Hibiscus Flower Iced Tea

Ingredients:

  • ½ cup dried hibiscus flowers
  • 4 cups cold water (filtered if possible)
  • Fresh ginger, mint, or a cinnamon stick (optional)

Special Equipment:

  • Measuring cup
  • Pitcher
  • Long-handled spoon
  • Large tea ball or infuser (such as this FORLIFE Capsule Infuser)
  • Fine-mesh sieve (if you don’t have a large tea ball or infuser)

Method:

  1. Add the dried hibiscus flowers to the tea ball or infuser and place in the pitcher (or add the dried hibiscus flowers directly to the bottom of the pitcher).
  2. Cover the dried flowers with cold water and gently stir with a long-handled spoon. Refrigerate for a minimum of 12 hours and up to 24 hours (remove the hibiscus at this point to prevent bitter flavors from developing).
  3. Remove the tea ball or infuser (or pour the loose tea through a fine-mesh sieve). Serve cold with plenty of ice. Cold brewed hibiscus iced tea can be stored in the fridge for up to a week.

Don’t be a late bloomer—hop on board and see what the edible flower trend is all about for yourself.

Categories
No Gym Required Sweat

Why Beach Workouts Are The Perfect Way To Take A Vacation From Your Exercise Routine

There are plenty of perks to vacationing near the beach: an extra dose of sunshine, playing in the water, and, of course, exercising on the sand.
If you’re looking for a beach workout you can do with just your body weight, we’ve got you covered. From running and HIIT to circuit training and yoga, you can do just about any form of exercise on the sand.
But before you head for the shore, check out the workout wisdom and beach tips the experts share with their clients to help them stay in shape—even on vacation.

What are the benefits of working out on the beach?

Whether you’re jogging or doing a quick circuit training workout, [linkbuilder id=”6719″ text=”running on the beach”] is perfect for challenging your body. Here are a few reasons you should consider hitting the beach on your next vacation.

There’s less impact on your body.

Running on the sand has less impact on your body, which makes it easier on your joints.

The sand makes for more resistance.

You know those tiny little grains of sand you sift through your toes? Well, certified personal trainer Corey Phelps says those grains create an unstable surface and add resistance to any workout. In other words, sand creates an increase in muscle recruitment and provides a higher calorie burn.

Variety is the spice of life.

Like Phelps says, “You can do virtually any workout on the beach, barring the ones that include complex equipment. The beach is perfect for running, yoga, Pilates, Zumba or HIIT.”

It’s fun and functional.

According to certified personal trainer Lyuda Bouzinova, the beach offers a more functional workout because exercising on the sand incorporates the element of balance into every motion. “In real life, you must balance your body as you move around, push, pull, and lift things, and traditional gym exercises isolate those movements to focus on just one at a time instead of the holistic way we use our bodies,” she explains. That’s why the sand is such a diverse surface to challenge your body.

Your core will thank you.

“No matter what exercises you do, you will also be working your core as well as all the smaller stabilizing muscles which normally wouldn’t be engaged if you are just doing the exercise inside of a gym,” explains Bouzinova. She says the smaller muscles are crucial to strengthen but usually take a long time because it’s so hard to engage them in a typical gym workout.

You can make every minute count.

The sand provides an added resistance that allows you to have a more intense workout in a shorter period of time.

You’ll get a nice vitamin D boost.

You get a healthy dose of vitamin D when you work out at the beach. But make sure to wear sunscreen, even if you exercise in the morning.

What are some different types of beach workouts you can do?

One of the top benefits of working out on the beach is the variety it offers, which can help you stay motivated and excited about staying active while on vacation.
If you’re looking for a pure cardio workout, you can run or sprint. Bouzinova says to run closer to the water where the sand is sturdier. This allows you to go faster without having to worry about twisting your ankle on an uneven surface.
The beach also offers the perfect venue for doing a HIIT or bodyweight workout.
Consider going through a full-body circuit that incorporates bodyweight exercises for your arms, legs, shoulders, back, and core (more on this later). If you want to make it a HIIT workout, you can add cardio bursts of running or sprinting down the beach in between the bodyweight exercises.
The beach is also an ideal location for doing an early morning yoga workout or Pilates routine before the sun comes up. Bouzinova says to just be aware of the uneven and changing surface every time you move because that can make the moves more challenging.

What are the best conditions for working out on the beach?

Wet sand or dry sand? Barefoot or shoes? Knowing the best conditions for working out on the beach can mean the difference between a supercharged workout and one that you walk away from halfway through. As a professional volleyball player who took her skills from the court to the sand, Fitbit Ambassador Nicole Branagh knows exactly how these conditions can affect your workout.
Branagh says that hard sand creates a dense, stable surface, whereas soft sand creates a higher level of instability, which makes you work harder. And when it comes to shoes, she doesn’t wear any. “Being barefoot allows me to use my whole foot and strengthen all the different muscles I didn’t know I have,” she explains.
Running barefoot allows your feet to move through their natural range of motion. This can help strengthen your feet and ankles. That said, pay attention to any unusual aches or pains you may experience while working out. If you have plantar fasciitis, ankle injuries, or any lower leg problems, you may want to ask your doctor or physical therapist for their recommendation.
And remember to start slow. If you’re new to running barefoot on the beach, try a shorter distance for your first run, and then add five minutes to each workout.

Tips for Working Out on the Beach

Advice from a pro always come in handy when working out on the beach, and Branagh knows exactly how to perfect fitness and form for beach exercise.
Here, she shares her three top tips for beach workouts in the sand:

Always warm up.

One dynamic way to warm-up is to start off down by the water (at the edge of the ocean) and sprint uphill. You need to give your muscles time to adjust to the sand. Consider doing a longer warm-up the first couple of times you exercise on the beach.

Track your heart rate.

Branagh uses her Fitbit to track her heart rate, which helps her maintain a high level of training. A heart rate monitor will help you stay in the training zone that is appropriate for you. For example, a 30-year-old female who wants to exercise at a vigorous intensity level at 70 to 85 percent of her maximum heart rate should aim for 133 beats per minute (70 percent) to 161 beats per minute (85 percent). There are several tools online that can help you determine your target heart rate zone.  

Utilize the lifeguard towers or other landmarks at the beach.

If you don’t have time to do a total body workout, you can mix 10 sprints in between lifeguard towers or other markers on the beach, such as umbrellas.

Sample Beach Workout

Now that you know all the benefits of taking your workout to the sand, it’s time to hit the beach and get your sweat on.
Here is Branagh’s go-to beach workout for the summer. Perform each exercise back-to-back with no rest until you get to the end of the round. Take a 30-second break and repeat the entire circuit two more times (three times total).

  • 10 lifeguard tower sprints (sprint to one tower and jog back)
  • 10 push-ups
  • 10 block jumps
  • 20 bicycle crunches (on an incline coming up from the water)
  • 20 skater jumps (10 on each side)
  • 25 regular crunches

For a little variety, try Branagh’s beach workout the first morning of your vacation and Bouzinova’s beach circuit workout on the second morning. You can alternate these two workouts for the remainder of your vacation, taking a day off after two consecutive workouts.
Bouzinova’s beach circuit workout is intermediate, but you can make it easier by doing the following:

  • Replace the explosive moves (snap jumps and frog jumps) with just raising your knees (like marching in place).
  • Only do two to four reps of the explosive moves.
  • Instead of side plank with twist, do a regular side plank or traditional plank.
  • Instead of platypus walk, hold the platypus walk position in place and don’t walk.
  • For glute bridge kicks, instead of doing the move one leg at a time, raise your hips with both feet on the ground.
Categories
Happy x Mindful Wellbeing

Positive Affirmations Actually Work: Here's How To Start

We all have inner voices within our minds. Sometimes those voices encourage us, but often they supply us with negative self-talk: I’m not good enough to get that promotion. I’ll never meet the right person. Ugh, I’m so lazy for not exercising yesterday.
Before we know it, we let these negative thoughts cloud our minds and absorb our energy.
According to Eckhart Tolle, best-selling author and spiritual teacher, “the primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” So what if we spend a little more time and energy working on changing our thoughts? We’d be much happier and, chances are, much more successful, too.
That’s where positive affirmations come in. They help redirect our brains to send us encouraging, uplifting statements—instead of negative ones. These positive affirmations build our confidence, boost our mood, and increase our productivity and happiness.
By implementing positive affirmations into your daily routine, you can change your mindset—and, ultimately, change your life.

What are positive affirmations?

Positive affirmations aren’t just feel-good statements. When done right, they can actually alter the neural pathways in our brains.
“The mental image we carry of ourselves and our mind is referred to as our self-image,” explains Tanya Ince, PhD, a money coach who helps individuals reach their highest potential. “Our self-image determines our actions, decisions, behaviors, and what we believe to be true.”
Positive affirmations are statements that help to change our self-image. Even though our self-image begins forming when we’re infants, we can make alterations to it as adults. For instance, if we believe we’re unlovable, we can form a positive affirmation to alter that belief.
“The average human thinks 40,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day, but it can be even more than that,” says Ince. “Most of these thoughts are unconscious and happen automatically, like when we’re driving our cars.” To take control of those 60,000 thoughts (and our lives!), we can use affirmations to install new beliefs that support our goals.
And if you’re totally new to positive affirmations or doubt their power, read on.

The Three Main Types of Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations aren’t fluff: They remind our brains of what’s good, true, and helpful. They help us reach outside of those negative, circular thoughts. And they come in three main varieties.

Positive Affirmations for Your Identity

Affirmations about your identity speak to who you are. Do you believe you’re a good mother? A faithful friend? A thoughtful person?
[pullquote align=”center”]“Our self-image determines our actions, decisions, behaviors, and what we believe to be true.”
—Tanya Ince, PhD[/pullquote]
Even if you’re self-confident, you might carry doubts and deeply held beliefs about who you are or aren’t. Positive affirmations that target negative thoughts about your identity might look like: “I am a fun, likeable person” or, “My body is healthy and beautiful.”

Positive Affirmations for Your Capabilities

What you believe you can and cannot do are beliefs about your skills. As Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t—you’re right.”
Affirmations about your capabilities might sound like, “I have the skills to succeed at this project” or “I know how to host a dinner party for my friends.”

Positive Affirmations for Your Relationship With the World Around You

Do you see life as easy—or hard and full of problems? Are people on your side or against you?
What you believe about the world can be modified through affirmations to fit a more realistic, positive outlook. We can remind ourselves with affirmations like “The world has many good people in it” or “Life is full of little joys.”

How to Create Positive Affirmations That Actually Work

“Pre-made statements, like ones from a list of positive affirmations, aren’t very helpful and often times don’t work,” shares Katie Sanford, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, owner of Found Hope Counseling in Studio City, California. If you don’t believe your affirmation, it won’t resonate with you.
To build positive affirmations that will help manifest your dreams and change your life, follow these five key requirements.

1. Target an area where you want more balance.

“What area of your life would you like to expand or empower? Your health, career, finances, family life, or spirituality?” asks Ince. Develop a powerful affirmation to home in on the area where you’d like to see improvement.

2. Make it personal.

“Creating affirmations is an art. They must feel like they’re yours,” shares Ince. “Your affirmation has to create a feeling in order to change your neural pathways.” She shares an easy tip: Add your name to your affirmation, like “I, Melanie, find enjoyment in my work.”
[pullquote align=”center”]”Everyone has negative core beliefs, they just affect us differently. All of us can benefit from looking at what we’re believing.”
—Katie Sanford, Found Hope Counseling[/pullquote]

3. State your affirmation in the positive—avoid negative wording.

According to Ince, your positive affirmation shouldn’t include the phrases, “I don’t,” “I won’t,” or “I can’t.”
So rather than saying, “I won’t let people walk all over me,” your affirmation stated in the positive could be: “I am strong and my opinions matter.”

4. Resist comparisons to other people and moments in time.

The words “better,” “worse,” “less,” and “more” shouldn’t make an appearance in your affirmation. Don’t compare yourself with your past self or other people.
To make this easier, Ince explains that positive affirmations should be written in the present tense, not the future. Instead of “I will love myself,” say, “I do love myself.” Instead of “I’ll exercise more,” try: “I take care of my body every day.”

5. Be realistic, but stretch yourself.

“Your affirmations need to be realistic, or you’ll feel like you’re lying to yourself,” says Sanford. Your positive affirmation must be true yet helpful. In other words, it should feel attainable but push you toward empowerment and positive self-image.
If you don’t feel confident in a certain area, like your job, don’t create an affirmation that says you’re the next CEO. Instead, use an affirmation like, “I am skilled and resourceful. I can always figure things out.”

When and How to Implement Positive Affirmations

Now that we know how to create award-winning, life-changing affirmations, how the heck do we use them?
Combining a variety of methods works best, explains Ince. Aim to receive your affirmations visually and audibly as often as possible.
Write your affirmations on a sticky note and adhere them to your bathroom mirror or your computer monitor. “You can also record them using your cell phone and play them back to yourself,” shares Ince.
If you meditate regularly, repeat your affirmation over and over throughout your practice. “You can even write down your affirmation 10 to 15 times on a piece of paper. It can be surprising how well writing repetition works,” says Ince.
If you have a partner or friend who wants to help, they can even read or say your affirmation to you. When you hear your affirmation, like “Jasmine has fun in her life.” Respond with: “Yes, it’s true.” In this way, you’re both accepting and confirming your own affirmation.
“I’ve even used positive affirmations in group sessions. It’s helpful because as people are saying and hearing each other’s affirmations, they naturally begin to reaffirm them for each other. When someone says, ‘I’m capable,’ and a room full of people nod, the affirmation sinks in deeper,” Sanford says. She also notices that people’s postures change when they say their affirmations. Their heads are up and their shoulders are back.

The Best Time of Day for Positive Affirmations

Want your positive affirmations for success to really sink in? Start when you wake up, and end your day with them.
“In the morning, our brains are the most open to change,” says Ince. So when you’re lathering up your hair with shampoo or washing your face, repeat your affirmation a few times.
Include your affirmation in your bedtime routine, too, because your subconscious mind helps to install your affirmations as you sleep, Ince explains.
Here’s to kicking negative thoughts and dreaming easier!

How long does it take for positive affirmations to work?

Ever since Maxwell Maltz published Psycho-Cybernetics in 1960, it’s been believed that it takes 21 days to form a new habit. Newer research out of the University College London indicates that it actually takes around 66 days, or about two months. “Changing your self-image or a long-held belief can take longer than that,” explains Ince. “It’s important not to give up when there’s some resistance. Keep going.”
Implementing a positive affirmation doesn’t have to be a super serious endeavor, either, encourages Ince. “Think of it as a playful exercise, an experiment.” Try repeating your affirmation for three to four weeks to see what happens. What new opportunities pop up? What new feelings or beliefs do you have about yourself and the world?
“It doesn’t take long to use your positive affirmations every day. A few minutes in the morning or throughout the day are all you need. The more reminders, the better—and the faster the change will happen,” shares Ince.
“Everyone has negative core beliefs, they just affect us differently. All of us can benefit from looking at what we’re believing,” says Sanford. “Everyone can benefit from positive affirmations.”

Categories
No Gym Required Sweat

How Couples Yoga Can Strengthen Your Mind, Body, And Relationship

If you think finding a deeper connection with your partner, decreasing stress, enhancing your sexual relationship, and getting fit all at the same time sounds like a sweet deal, you might want to consider rolling out a yoga mat (or two).
Couples yoga is changing the way we look at the the role of exercise in relationships.

What are the benefits of couples yoga?

The benefits of couples yoga are similar to an individual yoga class and include stress reduction, increased range of motion, relief from pain, cardio and circulatory health, improved respiration and energy, better posture, and much more. Couples yoga takes these benefits one step further and also includes the element of bonding with your partner in a new way.  
By creating a shared experience, the poses in couples yoga allow you and your partner to listen to each other and work together. “Couples yoga helps bring couples closer physically, emotionally, and energetically,” explains Beth Shaw, founder and CEO of YogaFit.
The benefits, Shaw says, include physical bonding, unifying goals of getting in the pose, teamwork building, and improved communication. “Couples yoga also gives couples an activity to do together that they can both improve with as time goes on,” she adds.
Psychotherapist and certified yoga practitioner Stefani Reitter says couples yoga can be a lifesaver for relationships in a rut. “Yoga can actually shift relational dynamics by decreasing the ‘fight or flight’ tendency that couples get stuck in while arguing,” she explains. “I have specific partner yoga poses that I have clients do in session and then assign for homework, so they have something to integrate into their daily routine.”

How do you get your partner involved if they’re new to yoga?

If you’re ready to sign-up for a couples yoga class, but your partner is still undecided, Topnotch Resort’s yoga instructor and art therapist Melisa Oliva recommends a one-class pass or an introductory workshop, so your partner feels invited to explore without the pressure to commit for an unlimited period of time.
Once you both commit to the idea of doing couples yoga, make sure you choose a class and instructor that works for both of you. Try to find a class that is beginner friendly so the poses won’t seem intimidating.

Are there therapeutic benefits of doing couples yoga?

Every relationship goes through its own challenges, with some more difficult than others. Finding healthy and productive ways to work through conflict or any other issues that relationships go through can help enhance and strengthen your partnership.
One of the appeals of couples yoga is the therapeutic benefits partners can experience while moving through the poses together. In fact, a study done by Loyola University Health System found that partner yoga may help couples who are struggling with sexual dysfunction by strengthening their relationship emotionally, physically, and spiritually to ultimately build a deeper connection and improve sexual health according to one of the researchers and professors.
“Even just reflecting about their shared feelings after a couples yoga class can be very beneficial, and it can even bring back a ‘lost spark’ that couples are always trying to keep alive,” explains Oliva, “giving them the opportunity to touch each other, to breathe together, and to remember the deep connection between them.”

Couples Yoga Poses to Try Together

Participating in a couples yoga class can help you build the foundation of the poses and learn from the cues of the instructor. Once you feel confident that you can do the poses on your own, try this couples yoga workout designed by Diane Malaspina, PhD, Yoga Medicine instructor, and psychologist.

Breath Awareness

Start seated in a cross-legged position with your backs leaning into each other. Rest your hands on your thighs, close your eyes, and follow your breath. Be aware of your inhales and exhales, then shift your attention to your partner’s inhales and exhales. Try to sync the breath by feeling the subtle expansion and contraction of your partner’s rib cage. Practice for 3 minutes.

Seated Easy Twist

Start seated in a cross-legged position, facing one another with your knees touching. For both partners: Reach your right hand behind you, across your back, to reach the right fingers toward the left side of your waist. Reach your left hand across and grab your partner’s right hand. Communicate with each other as to how much you’d like your partner to gently pull on your right hand to deepen the twist. Hold for 10 breaths and switch sides.

Seated Wide Leg Forward Fold

Stay seated and spread your legs wide, joining the soles of your feet with your partner’s. Reach forward and grab each other’s wrists, walking your hands to reach for their forearms. Communicate to decide who will fold first. Slowly lean back, gently pulling your partner into a forward fold. Communicate how deep you’d like to fold. Hold for 10 breaths and switch.

Seated Easy Forward Fold

For this pose, one partner is in a seated forward fold and the other is in a supported backbend. Start seated in a cross-legged position with your backs leaning up against one another. Communicate to decide who will fold forward first. For the partner folding: Walk your hands forward coming into a fold. For the other partner: Lean back, keeping your bodies in contact and your hands on the floor alongside of you, palms turned up. Allow your head to rest on the rounding of your partner’s upper back. Relax and take 10 slow breaths, then switch.

Standing Forward Fold

Stand with the back of your hips leaning into each other. Bend your knees and fold forward. Once you’ve folded, reach back and grab each others’ hands, walking your hands toward their forearms, gently drawing your partner closer. Communicate on how deep you want to go into the pose. Knees can be bent or straightened. Hold for 10 breaths.

Tree Pose

Stand next to each other. The partner on the right will balance on the left foot, and the partner on the left will balance on the right foot. Bring the the non-standing foot on to the inner shin (toes can rest on the floor or on the shin) or the inner thigh. Avoid bringing the foot to the inner knee. Open the lifted knee to the side. Partner on the right: reach your left hand out to the side to join palms with the partner on the left (who will reach the right hand out to the side to join palms). Hold for 5 to 10 breaths and switch sides.

Supported Chair

Stand facing one another, feet pointing straight forward and hip-width apart. Clasp your partner’s forearms and walk your feet back so the arms are extended. Bend the knees and send the hips back as if you were about to sit on a chair. Use the bi-directional pull on each other’s arms to stay up. Hold for 5 to 10 breaths. To release, straighten the legs and step toward your partner.

Standing Backbend

Stand facing one another, feet pointing straight forward and hip-width apart. Leave about a foot of space between your toes and your partner’s toes. Clasp around each other’s forearms with your elbows bent. Bring a slight bend to the knees. Lift from your chest, arch your upper back up, look up (but keep the neck long). The arms will straighten. Draw the shoulder blades together to open the chest. Hold for 3 to 5 breaths. Return to standing.
The benefits of couples yoga are endless for both you and your significant other. If you’re interested in trying couples yoga, make sure you read through the instructions detailed in the above exercises carefully, and refrain from any poses that cause unusual discomfort or pain.

Categories
Healthy Relationships Wellbeing

Are You Demisexual? Here’s How To Tell

Ever feel like your sexuality is, well, a bit muted compared to your friends? While they’re busy swiping right, gushing over hotties at the gym, and spilling the details of last night’s hookup, you’re struggling to see how they can get turned on so quickly by people they hardly know. It’s not that you never feel a spark—it just tends to happen after you’ve spent time building a strong emotional connection with someone first.
Well, there’s a name for that—it’s called demisexual, and it’s totally normal.
“[Demisexuality] is … a way of engaging in the world, just like being heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual,” explains Cyndi Darnell, a sex and relationship therapist in New York City.
Curious about whether you might be demisexual? We sat down with Darnell to learn about the signs of this sexual orientation, how it fits into the asexual community, and tips on dating when you crave that strong emotional connection.

What is demisexuality?

There once was a time when you had two options to define your sexuality: straight or gay. Obviously, sexuality has always been much more dynamic and vibrant than that—it’s a spectrum, after all—but now we actually have the language to describe it. One such word that has been popping up lately is demisexual. But what is demisexuality?
“While the name is new, demisexuality is a sexual orientation that has been around since people have been having sex,” says Darnell. “People who identify this way tend to not experience sexual attraction to any gender or any person until a strong emotional connection has been established—that’s the core thing.”

Is being demisexual the same as being asexual?

Sexual orientation and attraction aren’t black and white experiences. Picture a spectrum with sexuality on one end and asexuality on the other. Those in the space between often identify as “gray-asexual,” or not identifying as totally sexual or totally asexual. This space includes demisexual people.
[pullquote align=”center”]“People who identify this way tend to not experience sexual attraction to any gender or any person until a strong emotional connection has been established—that’s the core thing.”
—Cyndi Darnell, sex and relationship therapist[/pullquote]
“Not strictly a variation on asexuality, demisexuals still experience sexual attraction but in a way that centers on emotions rather than lust,” says Darnell.
Darnell estimates that about 1 percent of the population falls on the asexuality spectrum, and a portion of that group is demisexual. Understanding what this means for you can help give you a sense of belonging and provide meaning to your life, says Darnell.
“We use these labels to help identify ourselves in a community or give context to our experiences, which is especially important for people who feel that they don’t fit into mainstream boxes,” she adds.

Signs You Might Be Demisexual

While desiring a strong emotional connection with sexual partners is a pretty common experience, there’s a difference between that and actually requiring a bond before you can feel  attraction at all, as tends to be the case with demisexuals. How can you tell if you’re actually demisexual?
“When it comes to sexual orientation, it’s difficult to say exactly how you know because, well, how do you know if you like pizza if you’ve never tried it?” says Darnell. “It’s really a process of coming to an awakening about yourself.”
The teenage years are typically the time that people start to notice and explore their sexuality. Remember when your classmates would decorate their bedrooms with posters of the pop idols and movie stars they thought were “cute”? If you found it challenging to understand exactly how someone could feel attracted to a person they’ve never met, that might be a sign you’re demisexual, explains Darnell.
Or maybe you find yourself deeply attracted to the personalities of people you’ve already befriended, putting their looks secondary. That primary attraction from a strong bond, rather than a hot bod, might also indicate that you’re demisexual.
“Demisexuals tend to notice that they only have those feelings of sexual attraction once they’ve developed some sort of connection to someone,” says Darnell. “They’ll be sitting around at a party, talking about who’s hot and who’s not, and they realize they don’t find anyone hot.”
A less fortunate way people tend to find out they’re demisexual is being regularly labeled as “prude” or “old-fashioned.” Your friends may have teased you that you wait too long to have sex with someone and that you don’t need to wait for “the one” to have some fun. But it’s not that demisexuals are afraid of sex or avoiding it—they just have to spend time building that strong emotional connection in order to get turned on by someone.
Tapping into the asexual community can be a helpful way to determine whether or not you’re demisexual. Darnell recommends exploring the forums of the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) and related Facebook groups.
“These are places you can go and hang out with other people who have been in those communities a bit longer and see what the different options are. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach,” she says.

Dating as a Demisexual

Between random hookups and online dating, it seems like the world has become increasingly casual about sex. There’s nothing wrong with that—but where does that leave people who need that deep emotional bond to feel attracted to someone?
Fortunately, there are some ways to make it work for you. Here are some tips for dating as a demisexual.

Choose progressive online dating platforms.

Bumble and Tinder tend to be more focused on hooking up, which might not make them the best place for demisexuals to have dating success, says Darnell.
“More progressive sites have categories where you can choose demisexual as part of your identity. Choose dating sites that will fit the expectation that you need to get to know someone first, and you don’t want to go near sex on your first few dates,” she says. Try OKCupid or Match.com, where you can include more information about what you’re looking for.
[pullquote align=”center”]It will feel truly refreshing when you meet someone who not only respects your intentions but also embraces them in an effort to build a deep relationship with you.[/pullquote]
That being said, you don’t have to publicly label yourself as demisexual if you don’t want to. Feel it out, and embrace the approach that feels most comfortable to you.

Be open about your needs.

Regardless of whether or not you slap the demisexual label on your online dating profile, it’s important to express your needs to people you’re dating. Be upfront about your desire to get to know someone before you want to jump into bed with them. These are totally normal desires in the dating world for demisexuals as well as people all over the sexuality spectrum. Letting potential partners know what would be a meaningful romantic experience for you helps you both evaluate whether or not the relationship is a good fit.

Stay true to your intentions.

People have all different expectations when they enter the dating world. It’s important to determine your intentions and stay strong if someone tries to sway you in another direction.
“Do not allow yourself to be ambushed or bullied into doing something you don’t want to do,” says Darnell. “It’s hard, because no one wants to feel rejected, but if someone is going to rush you into something you don’t want, that person is not listening to you, and there’s a strong possibility that he or she is not going to be a good match for you, no matter what.”
And it will feel truly refreshing when you meet someone who not only respects your intentions but also embraces them in an effort to build a deep relationship with you.

Consider dating other demisexuals.

While demisexuals comprise only a small school of all the fish in the sea, they might be your best bet for finding a great partner.
“Finding other folks in the community and on the gray spectrum might be a better match for you,” says Darnell. “But remember, there’s lots of people who may not identify as demisexual, but value strong emotional connections. You can be many things at once.”
Sexuality is a fluid thing for many people. Pay attention to what feels right for you, and embrace that—even if it changes throughout your life.
“A demisexual’s responsive desire may change and shift along with the libido levels of people of many orientations. A person can have multiple orientations, so someone may identify as demisexual alongside a lot of other labels that can give definition to one’s erotic place in the world,” says Darnell.